Tales from the RID: Presented by ThatOneGuyOverThere

[IAmThatOneGuy He/Him]

Let's give this a go.

So, for the past year or so, I've discovered that writing is actually decently fun.

By that, I mean my very soul has been sucked into it. 

Over a while, I've compiled a vast RID(Random Idea Dump). 

One of the reasons why I'm making this topic is that I've decided that I need actual feedback.
You see, over the time I've been writing, I have used AI to critique and edit my projects(please hold all gasping in horror, torch-lighting, and mobbing until the end). I didn't just blatantly ask it to write something, I would just send what I have and let it give feedback.

However, I have found that on numerous occasions, the line between me writing and AI editing and AI writing and me editing is very easy to cross. 

So, I hope that because of this topic, I will
1) depend less on AI
2) receive good, human feedback
3) Overcome any anxieties about sharing my stuff and receiving feedback
4) Get better at writing
5) Also spelling. Still need to work on gramar.
7) Maybe get a better sense of humor along the way
10) and a wide variety of other things.

Now that the insane ramblings are out of the way, I'll start with a snippet from my RID, just to get a taste...

Spoiler

Millennials

 

I am the Eternal Sovereign, Sempiternal Lord of Huuolia.

Except I’m not. Immortal, that is. Long-lived is a better term. For I am nearing the end of my days.

It has been coming for some time now. I’ve slowly been getting older for almost 500 years now. My days of youth have long passed. 

My empire, unlike me, has been going strong. I hope it lasts beyond my death. 

I have set up plans to search for the new Millennials, but it may prove difficult. I estimate them to have already been born, as I believe they come into the world when the old Millennials turn 975. That way, they reach the right age by the time the old die. 

I am not a good man. I have done horrible things. Things that would keep a man up at night. 

They did, for a while. But eventually, I considered myself above humanity

I once was normal, though. Before the Huuolian empire, before the conquests of Wiolr the Bloodsword. Just a normal man.

I was born many years ago. I’ve outlived many time measurements, so it is hard to remember. I had an ordinary birth. Absolutely nothing to signify my destiny. 

I can’t remember a lot of my early life. I don’t think my brain can handle the information of 1000 years, so I must have pruned many of my memories.

I do remember the night my parents died. Trying to look back, I assume a riot started, as there was much civil unrest during that time. 

I see fire. A blurry face. I can dimly recall being sent to a monastery. 

I still have trouble looking back on my years there, but I know that I lived there for a long time, almost until I was an adult. I met my first wife, Myla. I left the monastery and started a life with her.

If only I hadn’t been chosen. 

When I turned 25, I didn’t notice any changes. But as time passed, with my wife and kids getting older, and I staying younger, I wondered what was happening to me. People began to assume I was using dark magic to stay young. Myla began to wonder as well. Eventually, she died from a sickness, and that was that. People were convinced I was a warlock, including my own children. 

I wandered for a long time after that, fearing and hating myself. 

However, the change came when I was supposed to die. 

I was walking down a road when a bandit ambushed me, seeking to rob me. He pulled a knife and stabbed me. I didn’t die. I continued to fight, and I killed that robber.

My fear was replaced by the human traits of greed and pride. I viewed my eternal life as a gift from the gods. I began to view myself as higher. I learned combat, politics, strategy, and more. I gathered followers. Soon, my reputation had spread throughout the land. 

By this time, I was about 120, and I was becoming a completely different man than who I was before; a man who was cold and egotistical. 

The leaders of the land were worried by my appearance in the power dynamics of the realm, so they sent an army to kill my followers and me. They could not kill me, and eventually we drove them back. It only helped my reputation, and my ranks swelled. I was convinced I was chosen to be the ruler of the land, so I fully became Wiolr the Bloodsword, and my conquest began. 

By 300, I viewed normal people as either resources, obstacles, or inconveniences. I got to the point where I couldn’t care less if a village burned.

My fighting years were long and bloody. I took town after town, vanquished army after army, won battle after battle. Every loss was overcome by an even greater victory. With each fight, my experience, reputation, and ego grew. Soon, I had a sizable kingdom under my rule, and the people in it believed me to be a god. So did I.

Now, I realize my mortality. I was a proud fool, and a ruthless one at that. I know most of the sacrifices were worthy, but some were unnecessary. 

Soon, the rest of the kingdoms either surrendered or offered peace treaties. Huuolia was the largest empire in the known world. I had to trade my sword for a crown. I learned all I could about leading and established a strong government. I replaced temples with shrines to me, the Eternal Sovereign. I no longer thought I was chosen by the divine, but I was one myself.

But alas, my eternal youth was not so eternal after all.

As with when I turned 25, my change was very subtle. Sometimes it would be an ache in the morning or a slight tiredness. For a while, I convinced myself that it was merely the stress of leading. However, by my 590th year, I could see I was getting older. 

This was a blow to my immense pride, and I did everything I could to reverse it. I hid my ageing from the public and made servants swear on their lives to not tell a soul about the changes. But by my 660th year, the changes were becoming evident. So I turned to dark magic, the very thing the villagers convicted me of so long ago. However, the magic would not work on me. I did very bad things during those years.

By the time I was 800, I overcame my bitterness and decided I could hide no longer. So, as my body decayed, I began to search the history books once more. Eventually, I found examples of people living for many years in history, said to be up to a millennium. I have also heard rumors of a woman who lived as long as I have, but I have never met her.  So I composed a story to tell to my kingdom: That while my soul was divine, my mortal body that I had chosen could not last forever. I said that when the body died, the soul would transfer itself to another person, who would be the next Sempiternal Lord or Lady of Huuolia and a Millennial too. 

In my final years, I confess to this journal that I am not sure if that is the truth or not. Whatever it is, I have prepared the kingdom to search for the next Sovereign, or Sovereigns, depending on whether my theories are correct. When they find you, you will take my place, and you will read this record.

I realize that I cannot control you. No one can. You will be able to decide for yourself if you become the next emperor. But I hope that you do, for the sake of the people. If you decide not, devise a way to peacefully change the empire to give power to someone else.

Please know, Millennials, that I am sorry you must have this power. 

I do hope that your days may be happy.

Fire at will.

Edited April 7 by ThatOneGuyOverThere

[Adonalsium Will Return He/him]

Nice! I really like it. What time period is this? It’s pretty clearly not modern, but is it medieval or, IDK, 1700s?

[NerdSandwich she/her]

Yeah idk I've never really used AI; that sounds risky.

Cool! I didn't do an in-depth check, but it seemed grammatically correct to me. The only misspell I noticed at first glance was 'gramar', and that wasn't even in the story.

I'm actually cracked at grammar lol. My teachers always think I'm using AI.

Also, congratulations on spelling sempiternal right!

I think it is a great short story. It would also make a great beginning to a novel or smth.

[Through the Living Hopper He/Him]

15 hours ago, NerdSandwich said:

I'm actually cracked at grammar lol. My teachers always think I'm using AI.

Some one else feels the struggle! (I love em-dashes).

@ThatOneGuyOverThereThe only thing I noticed was that at the end "I" didn't make sense. You hadn't said that you were talking to the future Millennials. Other than that, it was pretty good!

[NerdSandwich she/her]

YES THE EM DASH
FEEL MY PAIN
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

[First of the Tide He/him]

As I understand it, you are asking for critique, but here's a spoiler box, in case I misinterpretted

Spoiler

"I have set up plans to search for the new Millennials, but it may prove difficult. I estimate them to have already been born, as I believe they come into the world when the old Millennials turn 975. That way, they reach the right age by the time the old die. "     

-feels a little awkward, with varying levels of specificity. 975 is a very specific number, but he's kinda listing it as a guess. does that make sense? like it feels like he isn't sure when exactly they're born, but also he's weirdly sure that it's exactly the age of 975

-does contextualize how old he is though, and is very effective at adding a sense of urgency

They did, for a while. But eventually, I considered myself above humanity

-feels awkward again. the rest of the piece reads as if he is writing/saying this while alive, but this kinda reads like he's writing this after having died. I might rewrite this to something like "But eventually, I have come to consider myself above humanity" or similar. something that shows the continuity and the mindset still happening, even as the character is presenting this info

I was born many years ago. I’ve outlived many time measurements, so it is hard to remember. I had an ordinary birth. Absolutely nothing to signify my destiny. 

-literally like most people were born many years ago. this feels unnecessary and obvious, and less descriptive than most of the other imagery describing his age

-this feels contradictory with the exact number of 975 again. if he doesn't remember his age, how does he know he's around 975?

-also not remembering your birth (which I'm pretty sure is what you're saying here) is like soooo very normal. If anyone remembers their birth, that's like really outlierish (Adrian Monk core)

 I don’t think my brain can handle the information of 1000 years, so I must have pruned many of my memories.

tone feels weird here, but I can't put my finger on why. maybe it's the wrong level of formality? I don't know it just feels wrong

"I still have trouble... including my children" 

the level of formality and/or certainty on this whole section fluctuates like  \sin^{2}\left(8\left(\cos2x+\sin x\right)^{5}\right)

I was gonna critique the whole thing, but the critiques are getting really repetitive. almost everything is just the little things, like why is he so certain about this but so unsure about this very related thing, and why is he sometimes talking like we're best buds just chatting and sometimes like he's leading a lecture hall

Overall I love it. love the Lord ruler vibes, and the urgency given by knowing when he's gonna die and the need for a successor. the concept and general writing is done really well, aside from your major room for improvement in tone, but I cant wait to see how you improve in the future

 

 

Edited April 9 by First of the Tide

[NerdSandwich she/her]

Yeah the specific numbers feel kinda specific sometimes

Edited April 9 by NerdSandwich

[IAmThatOneGuy He/Him]

On 4/7/2026 at 1:32 PM, Adonalsium Will Return said:

Nice! I really like it. What time period is this? It’s pretty clearly not modern, but is it medieval or, IDK, 1700s?

I thought of it as sort of medieval, but I suppose by the end of the 1000 years it could be in a Renaissance period.

18 hours ago, First of the Tide said:

As I understand it, you are asking for critique, but here's a spoiler box, in case I misinterpretted

  Hide contents

"I have set up plans to search for the new Millennials, but it may prove difficult. I estimate them to have already been born, as I believe they come into the world when the old Millennials turn 975. That way, they reach the right age by the time the old die. "     

-feels a little awkward, with varying levels of specificity. 975 is a very specific number, but he's kinda listing it as a guess. does that make sense? like it feels like he isn't sure when exactly they're born, but also he's weirdly sure that it's exactly the age of 975

-does contextualize how old he is though, and is very effective at adding a sense of urgency

They did, for a while. But eventually, I considered myself above humanity

-feels awkward again. the rest of the piece reads as if he is writing/saying this while alive, but this kinda reads like he's writing this after having died. I might rewrite this to something like "But eventually, I have come to consider myself above humanity" or similar. something that shows the continuity and the mindset still happening, even as the character is presenting this info

I was born many years ago. I’ve outlived many time measurements, so it is hard to remember. I had an ordinary birth. Absolutely nothing to signify my destiny. 

-literally like most people were born many years ago. this feels unnecessary and obvious, and less descriptive than most of the other imagery describing his age

-this feels contradictory with the exact number of 975 again. if he doesn't remember his age, how does he know he's around 975?

-also not remembering your birth (which I'm pretty sure is what you're saying here) is like soooo very normal. If anyone remembers their birth, that's like really outlierish (Adrian Monk core)

 I don’t think my brain can handle the information of 1000 years, so I must have pruned many of my memories.

tone feels weird here, but I can't put my finger on why. maybe it's the wrong level of formality? I don't know it just feels wrong

"I still have trouble... including my children" 

the level of formality and/or certainty on this whole section fluctuates like  \sin^{2}\left(8\left(\cos2x+\sin x\right)^{5}\right)

I was gonna critique the whole thing, but the critiques are getting really repetitive. almost everything is just the little things, like why is he so certain about this but so unsure about this very related thing, and why is he sometimes talking like we're best buds just chatting and sometimes like he's leading a lecture hall

Overall I love it. love the Lord ruler vibes, and the urgency given by knowing when he's gonna die and the need for a successor. the concept and general writing is done really well, aside from your major room for improvement in tone, but I cant wait to see how you improve in the future

 

 

Yeah, seeing the specific numbers now, it wouldn't make sense.

I thought of Millennials as being a safeguard against humanity's extinction. But living forever seemed kind of dull, so I made a very specific system of the Millennial life-cycle. They would be normal until about 25, then be immortal and unchanging for the next 475 years. When they reach 500, they would begin aging, though slowly. By the time they would be 975, the next Millennials would be born. So finally, the old ones would reach 1000 and die, and the new ones would be 25 and become immortal. I added the ages so it would keep in line with this life-cycle in mind.
So yeah, still got to work on it a bit. But I'm glad for the feedback.