5/26/25 - ginger_reckoning - a song for silence sub 22, 5082 words, (V,L)

[ginger_reckoning]

Hey all! Thanks again for reading. This week skips a little bit again since I decided to rewrite the prior section. I might go back and still sub the missing portion at some point once I have rewritten it. Basically, A and S encounter a group of cursed people like A who are also fighters, who agree to help. They convince A to play the violin for them, which she hasn't done in a long time, and Silence finally admits to itself that it doesn't think that they should die, even if they are cursed. 

 

Anyway, I still feel like leaving some of the details of the plan that we see unfold here unexplained beforehand work, but I would like to know if it seems too out of nowhere or confusing. And if the action scene works or goes on for too long. Thanks! 

[Appol PhD they/he]

I’m glad you didn’t wait for me to critique the last one before submitting this. If I ever fall behind I’ll be planning to catch up quickly.

Overall: I like the dynamic of dragon S feeling the connectedness of everything and still trying to destroy the world, and A not being able to handle that same sensation being what stops her from succeeding. However, the parts before that comes in didn’t feel that distinct or connected to the larger story—I find fight scenes tricky because they have to stand out within the story that contains them, and I don’t think this one had much to take away from until the connectedness is brought up. Beyond that, we’ve DMed about how the larger arc around S and A’s views around the world could be overhauled, and I think doing so will let this scene stand out a bit more. Essentially, I think what’s here around dragon S’s viewpoints and the connectedness A feels from the orb is a solid starting point to work around.

As I go:

Pg 1. Part of the reason I’m not totally on board with A putting the question of PU on hold is that the dragon threat doesn’t seem especially pressing, and we don’t get callbacks to her motivation of focusing on it.

Pg 2-3. I still feel like I have a tricky time understanding what is and isn’t possible with magic in this world

Pg 5-6. I think some exposition in the dialogue here is fine, but right now it doesn’t feel like the dragon has a strong reason for talking with the party like this.

Pg 7. All right we get the motivation here. Maybe leading with this could help?

Pg 9-10. I don’t have a hook to be engaged with what GS is doing, so his beef with A mucking up the fight isn’t the most engaging to me

Pg 13-14. I think A’s emotions have potential to flesh out this fight, but they’re coming in pretty late into the game.