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My parents keep using chatgpt or whatever to give me feedback on my college essays- and when I tell them to not do that, they acts like I'm being unreasonable. For reference, this is the intro to my college essay (be warned, it's political. If you disagree with what it says, just move on lol, I'm not in the mood for arguments)
SpoilerOn the 14th of June, 2025, Melissa Hortman was assassinated. Three months later, Charlie Kirk was killed in broad daylight in front of thousands of college students. Every day, the world is growing more violent and divided. So honestly? I’m scared. It’s been a harrowing few years in the world, especially in America. Insurrections, the pandemic, riots- a lot has happened in the past few years that worries me. The political right has grown more extreme worldwide, more racist, homophobic, anti-immigrant, and so much else. We’ve all grown obsessed with conspiracies about stolen elections, vaccines, climate change, and higher education. The worst part is how powerless I am against it. I’m just a scared kid- even with all the will in the world, there’s only so much I can do to change the world. I do what I can to get my voice heard, writing to my representatives, the newspapers, and to anyone who will listen. But there’s the issue: how can I convince people to listen to my point of view when I’m not even a person to them?
While this is what my dad wants to re write it as:
SpoilerThe assassination of Representative Melissa Hortman in June and the killing of Activist Charlie Kirk in September made one thing terrifyingly clear: our political landscape has become dangerously fractured and violent. I refuse to accept this as the inevitable. These targeted attacks solidified my conviction that the greatest threat to our nation is not some external foe, but our own failure to maintain civil discourse and democratic integrity at home. This division has become intensely personal, manifesting in legislative and judicial threats to the foundational rights of people like me. Rights as fundamental as marriage, equality in the workplace, and personal safety are in jeopardy. My generation inherited this divided America, but I believe we have the capacity and the moral responsibility to rebuild it. This commitment to active, solutions-oriented engagement drives every choice I make and defines my purpose for pursuing higher education.
THIS SOUNDS LIKE GODDAMN CHATGPT WROTE IT!THE WHOLE POINT OF A COLLEGE ESSAY IS FOR IT TO SOUND LIKE A PERSON WROTE IT.
