Defeating the Nightmare Bagel

[Factor She/Her]

8 minutes ago, Keteᛕ said:

Your doorstep.

Let that sink in.

  Reveal hidden contents

He's been waiting outside for like 4 days now

 

Factor stares at Ketek in shock until she is hit with a fake plant.

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Also, huh! I’m on the top posters here! Didn’t think I would get that anywhere. *promptly loses it*

 

Edited Friday at 07:38 PM by Factor

[Conure1243 He/Him]

Conure makes human meatball ice cream for @Factor

Don't ask me where I got the supplies for it.

You don't wanna know

[GG0z He/Him]

What if i want to know? 

[Ink and Embers Any pronouns]

Ink fills up several hundred IKEA sinks with water and puts xir sharks in them. Xe then puts the spaghetti shark in a saucepan and starts trying to hit Conure on the head with it. 

[Conure1243 He/Him]

Conure gets a concussion and promptly stabs the same bystander he previously killed

[GG0z He/Him]

GG0z stares at the both of them in utter disbelief and confusion

[Conure1243 He/Him]

What's the point of murdering bystanders if you can't murder them twice?

Also, the souls of the dead likely go to IKEA anyway

[Factor She/Her]

Probably. It’s the only place big enough to fit everyone who’s ever died.

[Conure1243 He/Him]

2 hours ago, Factor said:

Probably. It’s the only place big enough to fit everyone who’s ever died.

"Underworld is infinity,

but IKEA is creepier, deeper, and infinity + 1, and...

WAIT AREN'T WE SURROUNDED BY DEMONS WHO ARE TRYING TO KILL US?!

Shouldn't we be doing something about that?!"

[Keteᛕ He/Him/His]

"Nah."

[GG0z He/Him]

39 minutes ago, Conure1243 said:

"Underworld is infinity,

but IKEA is creepier, deeper, and infinity + 1, and...

WAIT AREN'T WE SURROUNDED BY DEMONS WHO ARE TRYING TO KILL US?!

Shouldn't we be doing something about that?!"

"No, philosophy is better"

[Conure1243 He/Him]

"Philosophy is confusinnnnng"

Edited 12 hours ago by Conure1243

[Keteᛕ He/Him/His]

"That's the entire point of philosophy. Its purpose is to be confusing so you have to think about it."

[Conure1243 He/Him]

10 minutes ago, Keteᛕ said:

"That's the entire point of philosophy. Its purpose is to be confusing so you have to think about it."

"thinking... I don't do that often!" Conure says, triumphantly

[Keteᛕ He/Him/His]

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hehehe you left your sentence without punctuation....

before realizing it took thought for him to say that, at which point his head explodes.

[Conure1243 He/Him]

"Oop! My head exploded again. Glad I learned to speak through my neck and hands after last time."

Conure produces a bandage for his neck.

[GG0z He/Him]

20 minutes ago, Conure1243 said:

"Oop! My head exploded again. Glad I learned to speak through my neck and hands after last time."

Conure produces a bandage for his neck.

GG0z decides that this is now normal

[Conure1243 He/Him]

Conure can no longer see, and crashes into a nearby isle

[GG0z He/Him]

GG0z pulls Conure back,  but it's too late. He crashes into a sentient meatball

[Keteᛕ He/Him/His]

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PUNCTUATION 

of little robots that attack him until he is tied against a palm tree, bound by his own arms.

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Oh that still works haha.

 

[Conure1243 He/Him]

"I don't like meatballs of metal," Says Conure, grumpily.

[GG0z He/Him]

33 minutes ago, Conure1243 said:

"I don't like meatballs of metal," Says Conure, grumpily.

"Too bad"

[Conure1243 He/Him]

*Odd length of silence*

[Ink and Embers Any pronouns]

4 hours ago, Conure1243 said:

*Odd length of silence*

"HELLO!"

Ink falls out of a cupboard in the kitchen department, accompanied by a cascade of clattering pans.