The Island of Epistolary Fantasy

[CoderDrag0n8 He/They]

1 minute ago, SpiritOfWrath said:

Umm… you might send a letter to the Imperiatos, stating that their terms were unacceptable.

Or you could notice that the coordinates were in the middle of the Bermuda triangle.

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No, like the Rehctaws went there and then what?

 

[Through the Living Wrath he/him]

1 minute ago, CoderDrag0n8 said:

 

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Well the meeting was to discusss terms - I could have greatly angered you.

 

[IcedOutPenguin He/Him]

45 minutes ago, SpiritOfWrath said:

High Guild,

        Unfortunately, my lands were razed in a dragon passing. Praise the Imperiato.

Terribly Sorry,

        Archibald Lennox

To the Lennox family

My condolences for the burning that consumed your lands; it will be difficult for the planting season.

I assume the rocks were not harmed? If so, that must have been some dragon. 

Sincerely, 

Ichor Mining Guild

[Through the Living Wrath he/him]

Just now, IcedOutPenguin said:

To the Lennox family

My condolences for the burning that consumed your lands; it will be difficult for the planting season.

I assume the rocks were not harmed? If so, that must have been some dragon. 

Sincerely, 

Ichor Mining Guild

Ichor Mining Guild

        They were reduced to lava. We had to move away for a time. Praise the Imperiato.

Sorry,

        Archibald Lennox, Vassal of Imperiato

 

[CoderDrag0n8 He/They]

15 minutes ago, SpiritOfWrath said:

 

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What were the terms and what were they for?

 

[IcedOutPenguin He/Him]

3 minutes ago, SpiritOfWrath said:

Ichor Mining Guild

        They were reduced to lava. We had to move away for a time. Praise the Imperiato.

Sorry,

        Archibald Lennox, Vassal of Imperiato

 

Lennox family

This news has created an interesting new opportunity for our geologist teams; they would like to survey the land after such a catastrophe, believing it could provide valuable insights into metamorphic rocks, as well as dragons.

Sincerely,

Ichor Mining Guild

[Through the Living Wrath he/him]

Just now, CoderDrag0n8 said:

 

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Terms of you giving tribute to the imperiato

 

[CoderDrag0n8 He/They]

Just now, SpiritOfWrath said:

 

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Oh.

huh

Dear Lennox,

You have made an enemy of the Rehctaw family. We send you an invitation too our manor. Just enter the woods. No harm there.

Come Looking,

The Rehctaw Family

[Through the Living Wrath he/him]

8 minutes ago, IcedOutPenguin said:

Lennox family

This news has created an interesting new opportunity for our geologist teams; they would like to survey the land after such a catastrophe, believing it could provide valuable insights into metamorphic rocks, as well as dragons.

Sincerely,

Ichor Mining Guild

 

 

6 minutes ago, CoderDrag0n8 said:

Dear Lennox,

You have made an enemy of the Rehctaw family. We send you an invitation too our manor. Just enter the woods. No harm there.

Come Looking,

The Rehctaw Family

Mysterious Rehctaws,

        I’ve done heard of the dangers in the words. I politely decline.

Healthily Wary,

        Archibald Lennox, Vassal of Divinity

11 minutes ago, IcedOutPenguin said:

Lennox family

This news has created an interesting new opportunity for our geologist teams; they would like to survey the land after such a catastrophe, believing it could provide valuable insights into metamorphic rocks, as well as dragons.

Sincerely,

Ichor Mining Guild

Ichor Mining Guild,

       Interesting proposition. I will deliberate with the Divinity.

Interested,

        Archibald Lennox, Vassal of Divinity

 

@mippo

Esteemed Imperiato,

        I have a few problems. The Rehctaw Family refused to offer tribute to your Divinity. They are obstinate in the matter.

        On another note, the Ichor Mining Guild would like access to my lands to study the molten stones. Should I request a tariff?

Anciously Awaiting Divine Guidance,

        Vassal Lennox

[CoderDrag0n8 He/They]

5 minutes ago, SpiritOfWrath said:

 

 

Mysterious Rehctaws,

        I’ve done heard of the dangers in the words. I politely decline.

Healthily Wary,

        Archibald Lennox, Vassal of Divinity

Ichor Mining Guild,

       Interesting proposition. I will deliberate with the Divinity.

Interested,

        Archibald Lennox, Vassal of Divinity

 

@mippo

Esteemed Imperiato,

        I have a few problems. The Rehctaw Family refused to offer tribute to your Divinity. They are obstinate in the matter.

        On another note, the Ichor Mining Guild would like access to my lands to study the molten stones. Should I request a tariff?

Anciously Awaiting Divine Guidance,

        Vassal Lennox

Lennox,

You have made an enemy. You will come to regret this.

See you soon,

Rehctaw

[Through the Living Wrath he/him]

12 hours ago, CoderDrag0n8 said:

Lennox,

You have made an enemy. You will come to regret this.

See you soon,

Rehctaw

Rehctaw,

        Your face offends me, and we have a poodle who would like to claw it off. Praise the Imperiato.

Not if I Have Anything to Say About It,

        Holy Vassal of the Divine

[___ He/Him]

13 hours ago, SpiritOfWrath said:

Esteemed Imperiato,

 

        I have a few problems. The Rehctaw Family refused to offer tribute to your Divinity. They are obstinate in the matter.

        On another note, the Ichor Mining Guild would like access to my lands to study the molten stones. Should I request a tariff?

Anciously Awaiting Divine Guidance,

        Vassal Lennox

Good Vassal,

      I see. I will send a shout out to their Manor and observe, and then we can take more drastic action

      Regarding the Ichor Mining Guild, their house leader is a good friend of mine, they may inspect them for free.

Sincerely, 

      Alistair Imperiato

[Through the Living Wrath he/him]

Just now, mippo said:

Good Vassal,

      I see. I will send a shout out to their Manor and observe, and then we can take more drastic action

      Regarding the Ichor Mining Guild, their house leader is a good friend of mine, they may inspect them for free.

Sincerely, 

      Alistair Imperiato

@IcedOutPenguin

Ichor Mining Guild,

        His Divinity has granted you permission to inspect our lands without fee.

A Humble Scion,

       The Vassal of Divinity

[CoderDrag0n8 He/They]

1 hour ago, SpiritOfWrath said:

Rehctaw,

        Your face offends me, and we have a poodle who would like to claw it off. Praise the Imperiato.

Not if I Have Anything to Say About It,

        Holy Vassal of the Divine

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Why do I feel the intense Intrusive thought for Rehctaw to just respond with a single curse word.

Vassal of the Underworld,

You wife must have bad taste, because your face looks like a dumpster fire.

Sincerly,

Rehctaw

[Through the Living Wrath he/him]

1 minute ago, CoderDrag0n8 said:

Vassal of the Underworld,

You wife must have bad taste, because your face looks like a dumpster fire.

Sincerly,

Rehctaw

Hectaw

        You must be married to justice, because only a blind girl would marry you. And your tongue is as sharp as a soup spoon!

Not very sincere,

        Holy Vassal of Divinity

[CoderDrag0n8 He/They]

1 minute ago, SpiritOfWrath said:

Hectaw

        You must be married to justice, because only a blind girl would marry you. And your tongue is as sharp as a soup spoon!

Not very sincere,

        Holy Vassal of Divinity

Oh Dumpster fire with the vague shape of a person,

When did an Ugly Racoon crawl over your face? Oh, right it just looks like that.

Yeah, 'holy',

Rehctaw

[Through the Living Wrath he/him]

1 minute ago, CoderDrag0n8 said:

Oh Dumpster fire with the vague shape of a person,

When did an Ugly Racoon crawl over your face? Oh, right it just looks like that.

Yeah, 'holy',

Rehctaw

Reeky Claw,

       At least something living crawled over my face

         Holy Vassal of Divinity

[CoderDrag0n8 He/They]

31 minutes ago, SpiritOfWrath said:

Reeky Claw,

       At least something living crawled over my face

         Holy Vassal of Divinity

'Vassal'

It appears you incredible intellect has finally deduced that you are getting insulted! Maybe one day you will figure out why you don't have any friends.

When someone goes into the forest, this time i'l keep them,

Rehctaw

[IcedOutPenguin He/Him]

On 7/28/2025 at 8:51 AM, SpiritOfWrath said:

@IcedOutPenguin

Ichor Mining Guild,

        His Divinity has granted you permission to inspect our lands without fee.

A Humble Scion,

       The Vassal of Divinity

Lennox Family,

We will come by to survey your lands in a fortnight. We appreaciate your cooperation.

Sincerely,

Ichor Mining Guild

[___ He/Him]

@SpiritOfWrath

Dear vassal,

      Please post some guards when the Ichor Mining Guild comes.

Sincerely,

      Alistair Imperiato 

[Through the Living Wrath he/him]

On 7/28/2025 at 12:12 PM, CoderDrag0n8 said:

'Vassal'

It appears you incredible intellect has finally deduced that you are getting insulted! Maybe one day you will figure out why you don't have any friends.

When someone goes into the forest, this time i'l keep them,

Rehctaw

In Awe of your Retching,

        Maybe I’ll bring some oil and lanterns.

        What’s not there can’t hurt me

You Would Never Catch Me,

        The Holy Vassal of Divinity

5 hours ago, IcedOutPenguin said:

Lennox Family,

We will come by to survey your lands in a fortnight. We appreaciate your cooperation.

Sincerely,

Ichor Mining Guild

Ichor Mining Guild,

        Thank you. We will be posting a guard, for all of our safety. Don’t wander into the forest… the guards are really just watchers for the Rehctaws.

Great Thanks,

        Lennox, Vassal of Divinity

5 hours ago, mippo said:

@SpiritOfWrath

Dear vassal,

      Please post some guards when the Ichor Mining Guild comes.

Sincerely,

      Alistair Imperiato 

Your Divinity,

       We have done so. I thought you would like to know that the poodle left behind a cluster of puppies. We have begun to domesticate them - these will be used. Did you know they breath fire?

With Great Awe,

        Your Loyal Vassal

[CoderDrag0n8 He/They]

Just now, SpiritOfWrath said:

In Awe of your Retching,

        Maybe I’ll bring some oil and lanterns.

        What’s not there can’t hurt me

You Would Never Catch Me,

        The Holy Vassal of Divinity

Wow thats a stupid name,

You think they don't exist? We protect you. See how yo fair without protection.

We wouldn't be the ones doing the catching,

Rehctaw

Spoiler

Acompanying this message, House Lennox finds all their farmland ravanged and destroyed by monsters. They never see the monsters, but what else could it be?

 

[Through the Living Wrath he/him]

Just now, CoderDrag0n8 said:

Wow thats a stupid name,

You think they don't exist? We protect you. See how yo fair without protection.

We wouldn't be the ones doing the catching,

Rehctaw

  Reveal hidden contents

Acompanying this message, House Lennox finds all their farmland ravanged and destroyed by monsters. They never see the monsters, but what else could it be?

 

Not As Bad As Yours,

        We are this close to letting our demon poodles loose on the woods. They clone themselves, you know? We haven’t been able to kill them.

Because We Won’t Be Caught,

        Holier than Thou

[CoderDrag0n8 He/They]

1 hour ago, SpiritOfWrath said:

Not As Bad As Yours,

        We are this close to letting our demon poodles loose on the woods. They clone themselves, you know? We haven’t been able to kill them.

Because We Won’t Be Caught,

        Holier than Thou

have you even even seen my face?

We welcome them. They can be killed. We've dealt with them before.

You sure?

Rehctaw

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Along with this message, the demon puddles increase dramatically overnight. Far far far faster then they have ever been able to clone themselves.

 

[Through the Living Wrath he/him]

On 7/29/2025 at 8:30 PM, CoderDrag0n8 said:

have you even even seen my face?

We welcome them. They can be killed. We've dealt with them before.

You sure?

Rehctaw

 

We’ve met, oh thou of Fallible Memory

       These are a special breed. Dog treat smugglers.

Oh Yes Sir!

        Archibald Lennox, Vassal of the Divine

@IcedOutPenguin

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You find a decades old treasure chest peeking out of the ground