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Posted
20 minutes ago, Unintelligenius said:

Unfortunately the Martians left and then the humans realized they were stuck in space with no fuel or food.

Fortunately, they developed a way to grow meat based off their own cell cultures. 

Posted
3 hours ago, Ashkaloda said:

Fortunately, they developed a way to grow meat based off their own cell cultures. 

Unfortunately every human alive is a vegetarian.

Posted
1 hour ago, Unintelligenius said:

Unfortunately every human alive is a vegetarian.

Fortunately, they remembered their heavy-duty radio equipment and sent out a distress signal to the entire system. 

Posted
3 hours ago, Ashkaloda said:

Fortunately, they remembered their heavy-duty radio equipment and sent out a distress signal to the entire system. 

Unfortunately, it was picked up by hostile aliens.

Posted

Fortunately, “Hostile Aliens” was the name of their race, and there was some sort of translation error. A better translation would have been “the cutie patootie super nice aliens” due to their charming appearance and very hospitable culture. 

Posted

Unfortunately, per the rules of their culture, they could only be friendly and charming to strangers for a maximum allotted time of two minutes and thirty-two seconds before they had to vaporize them. 

Posted
1 hour ago, Ashkaloda said:

Unfortunately, per the rules of their culture, they could only be friendly and charming to strangers for a maximum allotted time of two minutes and thirty-two seconds before they had to vaporize them. 

Frotunately the humans vaporize them first.

Posted
7 hours ago, Unintelligenius said:

Frotunately the humans vaporize them first.

Unfortunately, that makes them committers of genocide, so they'd rather not do that

Posted
11 hours ago, Ink and Embers said:

Unfortunately, that makes them committers of genocide, so they'd rather not do that

Fortunately, they banished genocide from under the law, being the last remnants of human civilisation, and thus clearing themselves of any genocidal crime they might have committed by vaporizing the aliens. 

Posted
On 2/8/2026 at 10:17 AM, Ashkaloda said:

Fortunately, they banished genocide from under the law, being the last remnants of human civilisation, and thus clearing themselves of any genocidal crime they might have committed by vaporizing the aliens. 

Unfortunately, galactic law states that they must all be imprisoned for life for their crimes. The space police come to take them away.

Posted
30 minutes ago, Unintelligenius said:

Unfortunately, galactic law states that they must all be imprisoned for life for their crimes. The space police come to take them away.

Fortunately, that meant that they were no longer about to starve to death. 

Posted
15 minutes ago, Unintelligenius said:

Fortunately, they keep traveling until they find a planet that is inhabitable and with aliens who will let them stay there.

Unfortunately, they all die, because the planet is inhabitable.

Posted (edited)

Unfortunately (for everyone else), the clones started executing all non-clones.

Edited by Bones

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