gatorprof
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This thread is for all your favorite cosmere dad jokes! Read them and groan. Add your favorites.
How many Shards does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Only one, but it has to have the intent to do it.
Why did the Shard cross the road?
Because that was its intent.
Why don’t Shards like doing carpentry?
Because they keep getting splinters.
What does a Shard eat off of?
Shardplates
How does the Lord Ruler like his punch?
Spiked
19

Yo Mama’s Day Cosmere Jokes
in General Brandon Discussion
Posted
Mother’s Day is close, so here are some jokes to celebrate. With apologies to all mothers everywhere - we wouldn’t be here without you.
Yo mama’s so slow when she burns electrum she sees what she did yesterday.
Yo mama’s so weak her spren only becomes a butter knife.
Yo mama’s so weak when she lashes herself downwards she just stays in place.
Yo mama’s so weak when she taps her goldmind she gets sicker.
Yo mama’s so fat her ironmind taps into her.