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2 hours ago, Shining Silhouette said:
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I went whitewater rafting a couple weekends ago and there was this one girl there that I hadn't ever really talked to ever. I got to know her on the bus ride there, and learned she was naturally mischievous after she kept tapping my shoulder with her paddle the whole time we were in line then acting righteously angry whenever I accused her. Anyway we start the rafting and eventually we get to this one part that's called "Jump Rock"- this like 40-55 ft rock in the middle of the river where people who want to jump can go up. Naturally, I went up to do it and funnily enough that girl's right next to me. So I jokingly ask if anyone wants to push me off and then she goes "I would love nothing better" and proceeds to shove me right off the side into a majestic flailing side flip into the water.

Don't you guys think I should be a professional comedian?

When you run cross country

If it doesn’t hurt, you’re doing it wrong! ;) 

When you get food poisoning...

Posted

*Flips through ‘Teaching for Noobs’ book* “Man I sure wish I was qualified for this… anyway, flip your textbooks to page 34, and start scribbling all over it with crayon- oh hello Mr. Principal!”

When you break an entire museum. 

Posted (edited)

Oh, don't listen to these people. They don't know what they're saying.

When you're on a rocket about to launch into space.

Edited by The Bookwyrm
Posted

Go, on, Stormfather! I DARE YOU!

When you laugh really hard at a joke and look up to realize that everybody else is staring at you.

Posted (edited)

“Guess I’m the only person here who’s not too dumb to get the joke, am I right everybody?”

When you start a war in sub-Saharan Africa so you can make a profit by selling weapons to both sides.

Edited by Landing Sequence
Posted (edited)

Now, I know you will never use this ever again, but lets find the solution to this impossible problem.

When you forget to write something

Edited by EmulatonStromenkiin
Posted

Here we have a not-so-fresh frog, blue rare, with a side of formaldehyde.

When you finish a 46-hour movie marathon

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