Worst Thing to Say

[Quivil]

"Oh yeah, I was going to tell you. I was the one who burned down the school that one time."

when you get a new book as a gift

[Robin Sedai she/her]

OMG, it's a first edition hardcover signed copy of the Necronomicon!! It's just what I wanted - thanks, Mom!!!

When you make an incredibly tasteless joke

[ThroughTheLivingSequence she/her/they/them]

*Angrily* "Why isn't everyone laughing?!"

When you destroy your neighbors flowerbed right in front of them.

[Voidspawn he/him]

"I'm allergic."

When you swallow a can of beans whole.

[Szeth's Facepalm]

Tastes just like peanut butter.

When you ask someone if they have read anything by Brandon Sanderson and they say no

[Going_North_cal]

You don't need your gastro-intestinal tract, right?

When you panic at a party, and the DJ makes a beat out of it.

[Robin Sedai she/her]

"Hey! I copyrighted that!"

When you gain a cool new nickname

[Thaidakar the Ghostblood he/him]

Hey! I don't even need a real name anymore! 

when a parental figure dies.

[Robin Sedai she/her]

With the insurance money, I can finally get that sweet car I want!

...What did you say? Oh, right. restinpeace and all that HOORAY BRAND NEW FERRARI

When Dannnex gains a bow.

[ThroughTheLivingSequence she/her/they/them]

I prefer @King Bean's sin version.

When Dannex does not gain a bow.

 

[Thaidakar the Ghostblood he/him]

REST IN PEACE MY MELTY BOWED FRIEND!! AND THE SIN!!!

when J R R Tolkien is resurrected by a cult of readers.

[Voidspawn he/him]

"FOR GONDOR!"

When Hoid breaks the fourth wall and the Cosmere characters go to war with Middle Earth.

[Thaidakar the Ghostblood he/him]

HEY! my fanfic DID come true!

when Voidspawn isn't a robot.

[Robin Sedai she/her]

We must rectify that. muahahaha SCIENCE!

When someone follows you

[Going_North_cal]

do YOU want to read my book on the mating culture of swans??

When your mother inquires where you disappear to for 37 minutes every day at 3:48:12 PM.

[Thaidakar the Ghostblood he/him]

Uhhhhh I was, er, dancing at a ballet performance in Sweden as the swan princess???

when disappears from a zoom meeting where you were talking about writing.

[Going_North_cal]

Oh, it's fine, I don't HAVE to finish my three thousand page epic fantasy novel that i've hyped half the world up for.

When the Pineapple appears in my room at three AM with Freddy Fazbear.

[Szeth's Facepalm]

Hey, i was just craving pizza!

Spoiler

Idk man i never played fnaf

When your friend turns into a giant red panda

[Thaidakar the Ghostblood he/him]

um, FLUFFY!

when your best friend turns into an iguana.

[AonDoor he/him]

I bet you can't lick my eye from down there.

When your cat deletes your life's work

[Thaidakar the Ghostblood he/him]

NOOOO! THAT WAS MY SPEECH FOR MY KINDERGARTEN PLAY!!!! IT TOOK ME 26 YEARS TO WRITE!

when you are in kindergarten but ur seventeen.

[Robin Sedai she/her]

Did you know I'm the smartest kid in my grade?

When you decide not to make an incredibly tasteless joke.

[Thaidakar the Ghostblood he/him]

hey bro! guess what? I just saved ur life!

when your best friend references Veggie tales like a madman.

[Maddie The Survivor she/her]

Uhm…. Is your tongue that necessary? Or can you live without it.

When you see a copy of RoW thrown into a fire. 
 

Spoiler

Kinda hurt to type ngl.

 

[Rashek's PR Manager she/her]

*To the copy of RoW*You are a stick. You can't be fire.

when your friend finally agrees to read Cosmere works but want to know all the important spoilers first.