Worst Thing to Say

[AonDoor he/him]

Where the heck are all the radiants?

When the Assasin in White shows up on your doorstep

[Guest]

"Hello. Would you like some tea?"

When you're the Assassin in White and someone offers you tea

[AonDoor he/him]

Master, may I have some tea?

When someone breaks your oathstone

[Guest]

"Thank you."

When someone punches you.

[AonDoor he/him]

You... you should have... gone for the head.

When someone opens the door for you

[Robin Sedai she/her]

"Get my bags, boy."

When you're rapping along to Hamilton

Edited December 19, 2021 by Robin Hatter
why oh why do I keep forgetting to bold text?

[Guest]

"Its a good thing they shot that vile Alexander Hamilton!"

When someone insults your favorite character

[Szeth Pancakes he/they]

"But Moash is the best!"

When someone kills your entire family

[Guest]

"We'd agreed on 1000 dollars per kill, right?"

When someone destroys a book

[AonDoor he/him]

At least it wasn't Bra— THAT WAS BRANDON SANDERSON?!

When you're watching your friend in a play

[Thaidakar the Ghostblood he/him]

KILL THAT ROLE, wait your a tree. oh wait ur the main character you just look like a tree.

when you get slapped.

[Robin Sedai she/her]

mm. nice. do it again.

When you discover that the police are actually living custard creams

[Szeth Pancakes he/they]

Ooh, so you’re bulletproof?

When you’re trimming the Christmas tree.

[Robin Sedai she/her]

Make sure the fairy's dead, we don't want a repeat of last time!

When you're eating a delicious chocolate cake

[Szeth Pancakes he/they]

Mmm, delicious blood~

When you’re walking down a dark alleyway at night

[AonDoor he/him]

(Loudly) I sure hope I do not get mugged.

When you're chasing chickens

[Flaming Coinshot he/him]

Dinner! Get back here!

When your friend's expensive car shows up damaged in your driveway. 

[Eluvianii he/him]

*calling friend* What a crazy night it was. Anyway, you can come pick up your car now... Huh? No, I can't take it to your place, it doesn't move now. 

WTWTTSW you destroy your sibling's homework? 

[Szeth Pancakes he/they]

Mom! McK says the dog ate her homework! Funny, right?

When you’re eating an apple.

[AonDoor he/him]

Thanks for the apple, stepmother.

When you break a school computer

[Flaming Coinshot he/him]

"It wasn't that expensive."

When your friend drops the entirety of Mistborn into a fire. 

[AonDoor he/him]

When your country's being invaded

[Szeth Pancakes he/they]

Hey, let's send all our troops to deal with this minor border scuffle and leave the rest of the country wide open!

When you're looking for a good book.

[Robin Sedai she/her]

Whatever you do, don't read Brandon Sanderson's books. I hear his fanbase is craazzyy.

When you're in a fistfight with someone over a good book.

[AonDoor he/him]

I'm telling you, Wuthering Heights is way better than The Way of Kings. And it's shorter too!

When a cat walks on your keyboard