Aeoryi she/her Posted January 14 Posted January 14 1 minute ago, Theory said: eheheheh nooooooo still cis hehe sure sure sure Lily sure sure sure 6 minutes ago, Hmmm lies said: Dysphoria as an egg felt like a complete disconnect from the male gender. I was "a guy" but I never felt like one. I was just "A person who happens to be male". I felt a greater affinity for the female gender, and was somewhat frustrated that I couldn't be a part of it. (I had some incorrect ideas about transness at the time, again, I'll go more in depth later) Lies does a really good job at explaining this imo. I can definitely say that above was a pretty accurate description of what I felt. 1
Kansas Stormcursed he/him Posted January 14 Posted January 14 3 minutes ago, Theory said: eheheheh nooooooo still cis hehe idk ive always been "weird." but how do i know if its disconnect? Riight Lily
Usseewa ✾ She♡Her ✾ Posted January 14 Posted January 14 Just now, Aeoryi said: sure sure sure Lily sure sure sure hehe 1 minute ago, Kansas Stormcursed said: Riight Lily how do i...uhmm....make it so my brain knows you are talking to/about me when u say Lily? 1
Kansas Stormcursed he/him Posted January 14 Posted January 14 2 minutes ago, Theory said: hehe how do i...uhmm....make it so my brain knows you are talking to/about me when u say Lily? Time Time is the answer
Usseewa ✾ She♡Her ✾ Posted January 14 Posted January 14 (edited) Just now, Kansas Stormcursed said: Time Time is the answer nice cool thx Edited January 14 by Theory
Kansas Stormcursed he/him Posted January 14 Posted January 14 Just now, Theory said: nice cool And also us calling you Lily a whole lot, Lily 1
Aeoryi she/her Posted January 14 Posted January 14 2 minutes ago, Theory said: hehe how do i...uhmm....make it so my brain knows you are talking to/about me when u say Lily? you get more people to call you Lily, of course! You can also use it to mentally refer to yourself. I had very little problems switching to use Hazel because it was basically like I was never using my deadname in my head, but switching from Hazel to Tessa was difficult- I ended up going down the rubber band route by just inflicting pain onto myself whenever I referred to myself as anything but Tessa or externally referred to myself as Tessa- it leaves marks but not that bad marks. Also having other people call me Tessa in real life (specific cases) and online helped a *lot* Just think. Lily is your name. You are Lily. Also sometimes talking to yourself can help; try writing something about yourself in third person, etc
Usseewa ✾ She♡Her ✾ Posted January 14 Posted January 14 (edited) 1 minute ago, Aeoryi said: I ended up going down the rubber band route by just inflicting pain onto myself whenever I referred to myself as anything but Tessa or externally referred to myself as Tessa Uhmm... I believe that's called self-harm and it's not healthy... tho maybe a little different, probably not the best idea.. 2 minutes ago, Aeoryi said: Just think. Lily is your name. You are Lily. Also sometimes talking to yourself can help; try writing something about yourself in third person, etc Good tip, thx Edited January 14 by Theory
Kansas Stormcursed he/him Posted January 14 Posted January 14 1 minute ago, Theory said: Uhmm... I believe that's called self-harm and it's not healthy... tho maybe a little different, probably not the best idea.. Good tip, thx It's not really self-harm, as it's not intended for the purpose of really causing pain. It's a small reminder
Aeoryi she/her Posted January 14 Posted January 14 Just now, Theory said: Uhmm... I believe that's called self-harm and it's not healthy... it worked okay. And it doesn't hurt that bad. It's immediate pain and then a somewhat stingy-like feeling for a few minutes afterwards. The entire point is that you hate it. It's only a problem if it becomes addictive. Very effective. You can try it if you're desperate, but I highly encourage self-dialogue using the name Lily instead :3.
Usseewa ✾ She♡Her ✾ Posted January 14 Posted January 14 Just now, Aeoryi said: it worked okay. And it doesn't hurt that bad. It's immediate pain and then a somewhat stingy-like feeling for a few minutes afterwards. The entire point is that you hate it. It's only a problem if it becomes addictive. Very effective. You can try it if you're desperate, but I highly encourage self-dialogue using the name Lily instead :3. im...gonna pass on the former. I'll try the latter. what kind of self-dialogue?
Aeoryi she/her Posted January 14 Posted January 14 Just now, Theory said: im...gonna pass on the former. I'll try the latter. what kind of self-dialogue? when I got knocked over by a 250 lb person and didn't get back up, I told myself "it's going to be alright Hazel, it's going to be alright" repeatedly other things is like when I'm coming up with things to do, like, cleaning my room for example, I tell myself "You got this Tessa" or that kind of thing. I used to leave myself messages on my journal that said things like "make sure to drink water, Tessa" or things like that. I've stopped externalizing since but it's never a bad place to begin. 2
Shatter He/Him Posted January 14 Posted January 14 4 hours ago, Aeoryi said: when I got knocked over by a 250 lb person and didn't get back up, I told myself "it's going to be alright Hazel, it's going to be alright" repeatedly other things is like when I'm coming up with things to do, like, cleaning my room for example, I tell myself "You got this Tessa" or that kind of thing. I used to leave myself messages on my journal that said things like "make sure to drink water, Tessa" or things like that. I've stopped externalizing since but it's never a bad place to begin. mmm. I do this too. I'm training for the military, and I'm like “You got this, [name], keep on jogging,” and “You have to eat breakfast, [name]”. Also, how were there 189+ replies when I got back to this thread today. I CHECKED IT YESTERDAY.
Usseewa ✾ She♡Her ✾ Posted January 14 Posted January 14 (edited) 10 hours ago, Aeoryi said: when I got knocked over by a 250 lb person and didn't get back up, I told myself "it's going to be alright Hazel, it's going to be alright" repeatedly other things is like when I'm coming up with things to do, like, cleaning my room for example, I tell myself "You got this Tessa" or that kind of thing. I used to leave myself messages on my journal that said things like "make sure to drink water, Tessa" or things like that. I've stopped externalizing since but it's never a bad place to begin. I mean, I talked to myself in my head kind of, calling myself Lily, last night. And had to stop since I couldn't fall asleep lol. edit: I think that's what made it so I slept pretty terribly that one night I tried calling myself it a bit in my journal (which I rarely use...) also...I think I'm feeling euphoria, but idk. And...can it be manufactured? Like am I just telling myself to feel good when I call/get called Lily, when I think of being a girl or think of myself as a girl, etc., which would mean I'm not trans? How do I know... Also is "giddy" even the right word? I looked up the definition and it seems a little more intense than what I feel. For me, what I've been feeling is like I smile, I get a feeling in my chest or something and like my breath gets weird like I wanna make happy noises but hold.myself back cuz it would be weird. maybe i get a little warmer, heart a tiny faster idk. Anyway, Tess and everyone else, thanks for all the tips and help 5 hours ago, Shatter said: Also, how were there 189+ replies when I got back to this thread today. I CHECKED IT YESTERDAY. Idk, sometimes we post a lot ig. When someone's having a crisis or figuring something out Edited January 14 by Theory 2
Hmmm lies she/her Posted January 14 Posted January 14 Just now, Theory said: I mean, I talked to myself in my head kind of, calling myself Lily, last night. And had to stop since I couldn't fall asleep lol. I tried calling myself it a bit in my journal (which I rarely use...) also...I think I'm feeling euphoria, but idk. And...can it be manufactured? Like am I just telling myself to feel good when I call/get called Lily, when I think of being a girl, etc., which would mean I'm not trans? That all sounds like euphoria to me. Maybe you are telling yourself to feel good, but I don't think it would work unless you really were trans. 6 minutes ago, Theory said: Also is "giddy" even the right word? I looked up the definition and it seems a little more intense than what I feel. For me, what I've feeling is like I smile, I get a feeling in my chest or something and like my breath gets weird like I wanna make happy noises but hold.myself back cuz it would be weird. maybe i get a little warmer, heart a tiny faster idk. Euphoria varies from person to person, and time to time. But that does sound like gender euphoria, I think I've felt similar. 1
Usseewa ✾ She♡Her ✾ Posted January 14 Posted January 14 (edited) 1 minute ago, Hmmm lies said: That all sounds like euphoria to me. Maybe you are telling yourself to feel good, but I don't think it would work unless you really were trans. Euphoria varies from person to person, and time to time. But that does sound like gender euphoria, I think I've felt similar. okie....doesnt mean im trans hehehe....hehe...*objection dies out* still cis tho (my favorite line. Got it from eggirl or smth) Edited January 14 by Theory
Shatter He/Him Posted January 14 Posted January 14 (edited) 9 minutes ago, Theory said: I mean, I talked to myself in my head kind of, calling myself Lily, last night. And had to stop since I couldn't fall asleep lol. edit: I think that's what made it so I slept pretty terribly that one night I tried calling myself it a bit in my journal (which I rarely use...) also...I think I'm feeling euphoria, but idk. And...can it be manufactured? Like am I just telling myself to feel good when I call/get called Lily, when I think of being a girl or think of myself as a girl, etc., which would mean I'm not trans? How do I know... Also is "giddy" even the right word? I looked up the definition and it seems a little more intense than what I feel. For me, what I've been feeling is like I smile, I get a feeling in my chest or something and like my breath gets weird like I wanna make happy noises but hold.myself back cuz it would be weird. maybe i get a little warmer, heart a tiny faster idk. Anyway, Tess and everyone else, thanks for all the tips and help Idk, sometimes we post a lot ig. When someone's having a crisis or figuring something out That is giddy. Or at least, how I feel like it is. Just like really happy and you want to meep or whatnot. Like… you want to stand on your tippy-toes. It usually happens to me when I'm not depressed. Like rn. Edited January 14 by Shatter 1
Usseewa ✾ She♡Her ✾ Posted January 14 Posted January 14 (edited) 3 minutes ago, Shatter said: That is giddy. Or at least, how I feel like it is. Just like really happy and you want to meep or whatnot. Like... you want to stand on your tippy toes. YESSSSSS EXACTLY!!! I WANT TO MEEP! (i think so.....whats meep? like eep? basically like squeaking out that sound?) Edited January 14 by Theory 1
certifiedcranedriver she/her Posted January 14 Posted January 14 just had to quickly check identity theft law in the United States. we good. 2
Usseewa ✾ She♡Her ✾ Posted January 14 Posted January 14 (edited) 1 minute ago, certifiedcranedriver said: just had to quickly check identity theft law in the United States. we good. lol. wdym? for me? also who says i live in the states... Edited January 14 by Theory
certifiedcranedriver she/her Posted January 14 Posted January 14 1 minute ago, Theory said: wdym? for me? also who says i live in the States lol nah, myself 1
Usseewa ✾ She♡Her ✾ Posted January 14 Posted January 14 (edited) Just now, certifiedcranedriver said: nah, myself oh, good...Ihop e Edited January 14 by Theory
Kansas Stormcursed he/him Posted January 14 Posted January 14 7 minutes ago, Theory said: okie....doesnt mean im trans hehehe....hehe...*objection dies out* still cis tho (my favorite line. Got it from eggirl or smth) Lily 4 minutes ago, certifiedcranedriver said: just had to quickly check identity theft law in the United States. we good. Hhuh 2
Usseewa ✾ She♡Her ✾ Posted January 14 Posted January 14 is meep giddy like....you wanna hold your hands up to ur face and and move around a little? I'll see if i can find something online... here (just ignore the meme text) Spoiler Giddy feeling has left... My face muscles turned back into the usual frown-esque...
Honors Spectral Image She/her Posted January 14 Posted January 14 11 hours ago, Aeoryi said: alrighty alrighty The name I'm currently using is Tessa. I like it very much. Hi lies! cryptic behavior. I'll read the GDB later then. I think it's a pretty good resource, right? Ooooo I love Tessa it’s such a good name I’m sorry I can’t read the TWO WHOLE pages since I was last on but yah love yall and lilys a great name 1
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