Delightful Posted July 29, 2015 Posted July 29, 2015 The life of a chicken farmer has many trials and tribulations, often centered around the chickens themselves and their unusual egg-laying habits. Fortunately for me, the life of a chore-delegating chicken farmer's brother is packed with all the worst trials and tribulations. You are a terrible brother
Kobold King he/him Posted July 29, 2015 Posted July 29, 2015 You are a terrible brother 'Twas kidding. I'm the one who got them out, with a long shovel and a prayer that I wouldn't have to come closer. Unfortunately we weren't sure how old the eggs were, so they went to the dogs and to the cats. Why are you posting that here? Call the news and tell them about your superhuman (super...chicken?) chickens that lay eggs underneath cacti like it ain't no thing! Seriously, how do they even get past those thorns? The spot is ringed with cacti, but there are a couple of gaps at ground level that a small, clever chicken can squeeze through without getting pricked. Why they like laying their eggs in such dire places is beyond me. 2
TwiLyghtSansSparkles she/her Posted July 29, 2015 Posted July 29, 2015 'Twas kidding. I'm the one who got them out, with a long shovel and a prayer that I wouldn't have to come closer. Unfortunately we weren't sure how old the eggs were, so they went to the dogs and to the cats. The spot is ringed with cacti, but there are a couple of gaps at ground level that a small, clever chicken can squeeze through without getting pricked. Why they like laying their eggs in such dire places is beyond me. I read that if you put an egg in a bowl of water and it lies flat, it's good; if it floats, it's gone bad. Maybe they're trying to see how much of a badchull you are when it comes to collecting eggs? This could be their version of a reality show. 3
Delightful Posted July 29, 2015 Posted July 29, 2015 Maybe they're scared of the evil human who steals their eggs 3
Kobold King he/him Posted July 29, 2015 Posted July 29, 2015 (edited) Maybe they're scared of the evil human who steals their eggs Evil? I believe we've made our pact with them quite clear: We will give you free shelter; We will protect you from all predators that wander onto the farm, to the best of our ability; We will supply you with abundant food and water; We will care for you when you're sick; In return for us taking care of you in every conceivable way, you will allow us to eat your eggs. Not the eggs you want to incubate; we will always allow you to hatch those and raise them the way you see fit. We're only interested in the daily eggs that you lay and abandon. The eggs that would rot if we didn't pick them up and eat them. I don't like to throw the word "ingrate" around lightly, buuuut.... Edited July 29, 2015 by Kobold King 5
Kestrel she/her Posted July 29, 2015 Posted July 29, 2015 Chickens can get crafty with hiding eggs because they don't like people stealing them.
TwiLyghtSansSparkles she/her Posted July 29, 2015 Posted July 29, 2015 Evil? I believe we've made our pact with them quite clear: We will give you free shelter; We will protect you from all predators that wander onto the farm, to the best of our ability; We will supply you with abundant food and water; We will care for you when you're sick; In return for us taking care of you in ever conceivable way, you will allow us to eat your eggs. Not the eggs you want to incubate; we will always allow you to hatch those and raise them the way you see fit. We're only interested in the daily eggs that you lay and abandon. The eggs that would rot if we didn't pick them up and eat them. I don't like to throw the word "ingrate" around lightly, buuuut.... I'm sticking to my "the chickens are watching Extreme Egg Collecting: Kobold Edition" theory. 6
Kobold King he/him Posted July 29, 2015 Posted July 29, 2015 I'm sticking to my "the chickens are watching Extreme Egg Collecting: Kobold Edition" theory. If they keep it up I'll have to add a new clause to the pact. "Thou shalt not concoct ways to make us suffer for your perverse avian amusement." 3
Delightful Posted July 29, 2015 Posted July 29, 2015 So basically they've promised you their firstborn eggs 1
Kobold King he/him Posted July 29, 2015 Posted July 29, 2015 So basically they've promised you their firstborn eggs 1
Kestrel she/her Posted July 29, 2015 Posted July 29, 2015 tfw your friend gets her driver's license and she is like "hey i can drive you now!" but you literally don't trust her with anything and she starts nagging you about it and you don't want ?? to go in a car with her at all. she's that one person who saw me forget my water for band one day but by the time i was close enough to speak with her she forgot she was going to tell me i was like ten feet away nope not getting in a car with you I don't care how high you scored on the driver's test 1
Kestrel she/her Posted July 29, 2015 Posted July 29, 2015 this pixel killed me inside never animating wings again. 4
TwiLyghtSansSparkles she/her Posted July 29, 2015 Posted July 29, 2015 this pixel killed me inside never animating wings again. It looks awesome, though.
Kobold King he/him Posted July 30, 2015 Posted July 30, 2015 this pixel killed me inside never animating wings again. I want to hug him and cuddle him and feed him treats and call him George. 5
Kestrel she/her Posted July 30, 2015 Posted July 30, 2015 Thanks guys ^^ Her name is Sky. I think. She so blue. Why does anyone have a character that blue. Idk i just do what my commissioner wants 1
Kobold King he/him Posted July 30, 2015 Posted July 30, 2015 (edited) Thanks guys ^^ Her name is Sky. I think. She so blue. Why does anyone have a character that blue. Idk i just do what my commissioner wants Sounds cool. Did your commissioner provide a link for reading more about the character? In other randomness, here's a reptile from the middle-Triassic period with a unique flying style. While birds, bats, and pterodactyls have all used their forelimbs for flight and gliding... ...Sharovipteryx said "I'll do it my own way, thanks." Edited July 30, 2015 by Kobold King 4
TwiLyghtSansSparkles she/her Posted July 30, 2015 Posted July 30, 2015 In other randomness, here's a reptile from the middle-Triassic period with a unique flying style. While birds, bats, and pterodactyls have all used their forelimbs for flight and gliding... ...Sharovipteryx said "I'll do it my own way, thanks." I never wondered what the prehistoric equivalent of a car with rear-wheel drive would look like, but now I know. 4
Kobold King he/him Posted July 30, 2015 Posted July 30, 2015 I never wondered what the prehistoric equivalent of a car with rear-wheel drive would look like, but now I know. Sometimes I think God gets bored of His generic designs every now and then, and every other geological era creates a random experiment like this one. Personally, I'm not complaining. This gives my inspiration for new aliens, as all prehistoric creatures do. 3
Kestrel she/her Posted July 30, 2015 Posted July 30, 2015 Nah, they just gave me the link. They probably have a bio up somewhere though. You know who you'd have a blast with, Kobald? A good friend of mine on wolfquest/flight rising who goes by Sato Crow. He's awesome, and creates some sweet creatures. look at how cool I've always loved his critter/pet icons. Eeee those dinos! I love
Guest Posted July 30, 2015 Posted July 30, 2015 Today, I got up from my grandparents' Jacuzzi, and looked out the window, in a magnanimous, peaceful, and Jacuzzified mood. The first thing I saw was a hawk on a branch, with a raggedy hand towel draped over the branch under its talons. Upon further examination, the hand towel became a squirrel, and the "raggedy," bits of internal organs and brains hanging down. 'T'was quite a shock, but suffice it to say, I watched the hawk rip into that squirrel for quite some time. The circle of life continues...
Orlion Blight he/him Posted July 30, 2015 Posted July 30, 2015 A vulture returned to visit his dad after being estranged for a few years. He found him on the side of the road next to some roadkill, where vultures are wont to be. "What do you have there?" he asked his father "Carrion, my wayward son." "Will there be pieces when you are done?" And we'll say this all took place somewhere in Missouri. Near Kansas City. 5
TwiLyghtSansSparkles she/her Posted July 30, 2015 Posted July 30, 2015 Remember how I said I would consider naming my pug Obliteration? Well, at first I thought the best nickname would be Obi, but that meant everyone would assume he was named Obi-Wan. Then I thought of a better nickname for little Obliteration: Blitzy. 5
Delightful Posted July 30, 2015 Posted July 30, 2015 Remember how I said I would consider naming my pug Obliteration? Well, at first I thought the best nickname would be Obi, but that meant everyone would assume he was named Obi-Wan. Then I thought of a better nickname for little Obliteration: Blitzy.Which sounds to me like a nickname for blitzkrieg, which is totally in theme.
Kobold King he/him Posted July 30, 2015 Posted July 30, 2015 Ready to have your minds blown, boys and girls? Tomatoes, having seeds, are actually fruits. Already know this? Well prepare for a more disturbing revelation... Since tomatoes are fruits, this means that ketchup is technically a jelly.
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