The Battle for the Sandwich

[Immortal Platypus]

I, using my platypus powers of smell, detect that the sandwich i am holding is better. I keep my sandwich and say, "You can eat your sandwich, it's okay."

[NerdyAarakocra They/Them]

While you are using your platypus powers to sniff the sandwich, I take it away with one of those sticky rubber hand thingies.

[Immortal Platypus]

I take it back with a stick rubber ankle thingyTM.

[NerdyAarakocra They/Them]

I use a grappling hook to recover it.

[Immortal Platypus]

I throw your grapple aside in disgust. How did I get it? I got it when I took the sandwich from you obviously.

[NerdyAarakocra They/Them]

I yoink the sandwich while you are distracted by giving continuity reference.

[Lord Gregorio he/him]

YOINK! I delight as I shrivel away on to nothing buts seeds at the use of one of my favorite words. "I shall return!!!" Are my last words.

[Cinnamon]

Lord Gregorio was unspecific in what is was he yoinked so he didn’t realise that he yoinked an electric eel that electrocuted him and his shriveled seeds. While nerdy and Greg are distracted I take the Sandwich and emit an evil cackle while doing a jig.

Edited February 26, 2023 by Cinnamon
Seriously? I tried to put “spelling” here but I can’t even spell that. Ah the irony

[Lord Gregorio he/him]

I was delighting in Nerdy's use of yoink. I didn't yoink anything. But I guess as you snatch the sandwich, before I dissolve to nothing but seeds I leap forward and grab the sandwich for one last time before dissolving from acid.

[Immortal Platypus]

I, being boring, take the sandwich without using the word "Yoink." Wait. I just did? Confound it. I give the sandwich back because of my failure. Then I take it again cause I want it.

[ThroughTheLivingSequence she/her/they/them]

I decide that this process is far to complicated, and frame you for some crime you didn't do so that you get thrown in jail and I can take the Sandwich as "evidence".

[AltonicKeys he/him]

I am still working in forensics. I examine the sandwich, and take it out for further examination.

[ThroughTheLivingSequence she/her/they/them]

Due to the fact that I am simply more forensic than you, I steal the Sandwich from your lab and get away scot free while you get arrested on charges of leaving old appliances in your front yard.

[Immortal Platypus]

That was a crime?? I take the sandwich from you and take it to jail with me as I get arrested for the same thing as Altonic. The police let me keep it because they're nice and the the prison guards let me keep it because otherwise I'd sue them for taking my lunch and not giving me food that I can eat. They don't know my diet, after all.

Edited February 27, 2023 by Being of Cacophony

[ThroughTheLivingSequence she/her/they/them]

I stand outside your prison cell, glaring at you. "How about this. Give the Sandwich to me, and I'll shave a few hundred years off your sentence."

[Immortal Platypus]

"No deal. I'm happy here. No one can take the sandwich without me knowing."

[ThroughTheLivingSequence she/her/they/them]

Sequence scowled. "Okay, if you give me the Sandwich, I'll add a couple hundred years onto your sentence, and get you all the slightly-inferior sandwiches that you can eat."

[Immortal Platypus]

"Still no deal. I want my sandwich."

[Edema Rue she/her]

The Mushroom climbs out of the sandwich and hands it to Sequence. Having betrayed its purpose, it falls over dead.

[Immortal Platypus]

Using the Mushroom's corpse, Platypus retrieves the sandwich, adding a little to his sentence for desecrating a corpse.

[Edema Rue she/her]

Unfortunately, the mushroom had disintegrated, and was not of use.

[NameIess]

Fortunately, I am able to steal the sandwich with the power of justice.

[Immortal Platypus]

I sue the prison for letting my emotional support sandwich be stolen. They get it back and give it to me.

[ThroughTheLivingSequence she/her/they/them]

Unfortunately, I am a corrupt judge and pay someone to sue both of you over the Sandwich and in the end I rule that the Sandwich be turned over to the court for... investigation.

[NerdyAarakocra They/Them]

But I am the investigator! I recognize this scandal for what it is and publish an exposè. I get to keep the sandwich in the tumult that follows.