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MCrockett

Pattern trying to explain Testament

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I just finished the book and I was coming here specifically to ask what Pattern was doing in Chapter 75 when Shallan was spying on the potential Restares (but it was actually a different human).

Quote

Pattern's pattern swirled small and tight. "I try to be worthy of trust. That is not a lie. But I have brought someone for Shallan to meet. I think it is important."

He stood with a smooth inhuman motion, then gestured behind him with one long-fingered hand...

Standing near a statue behind them was a dark figure wearing a stiff robe. Like Pattern's, but dustier. And a head trapped in shadow. Twisted and wrong.

In reviewing the book, I realized this was Testament. Holy cow, that is so good! I don't know anyone personally who is reading this series so I don't have anyone to talk to about this... I just want to say, this was so, so, so good. I never suspected Shallan was bonded to a different Cryptic earlier in her life. And it was so sweet to finally see Veil's purpose fulfilled.

Anyway, I guess this is a weird topic. I just wanted to throw that out there. Thanks.

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I had completely forgotten about this scene.

The first time through I simply gobbled up the book, in too much of a hurry to process everything.  I knew in the back of my mind that there were things I didn't get, things I was missing... but I needed to get to the end!!!!  I'm rereading slowly now, savoring it, but I'm only on ch. 44.  I didn't even remember that this had happened.  Thanks for posting it!

I know I didn't figure out Testament until Shallan did.  I'm not the mystery-solving type generally, preferring to wait and be surprised along with the characters.  And this WAS a delicious surprise.  It's almost heartbreaking now to see how tortured poor Pattern was; all he ever wanted to do is help his Radiant, but Shallan is so afraid of her hidden memories and doesn't know what she needs.  He TRIED to tell her the truth, but he could see how much pain it was causing her.  So he decided to go along with the lies.  Now he finds that he has to talk to others behind her back, keep secrets from her, SPY on her, in order to try to help her.  You can tell it's hurting HIM to have to do these things, but he's in a box and sees no other way out.

And suddenly, there is Testament, in Lasting Integrity!  Maybe seeing her will be the thing that allows Shallan to get past the lies.  Maybe THIS what it will take to make everything all right.  He makes the incredibly difficult and brave choice to show Testament to Shallan, hoping it will help, but KNOWING it will hurt.  My eyes are literally tearing up right now, because I've been in that situation, fighting to make the right choice about how to help someone I love, someone who's in pain, and who may need to go through MORE pain before they can get better.  When the person you love thinks you are hurting them, rather than helping them, it's agony like no other, and I think Pattern knows exactly what he is risking.  Nobody can hurt you like the people you love most.  Pattern knows Shallan can easily KILL HIM, simply by saying the wrong words.  In this moment, Pattern is a storming hero.  He chooses to risk his own life - AGAIN - in an attempt to help Shallan.

But it doesn't work.  Shallan bolts, choosing to run from the pain again.  Pattern cuts his losses - Shallan is still in denial, but at least she didn't kill him yet.  He lives to fight another day.

Such a beautiful scene.  Thanks for reminding me of it.

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