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Introducing The Stormlight Archive to My Wife, or: A Hilarious Series of Names


Goatbringer

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What are Tay's predictions for:

  • Will any rock lobsters be involved in the book?
  • What new spren will make an appearance? What new spren would she like to see in the book? ("Spren" is plural in both questions - i.e., more than one.)
  • It's probably pretty obvious that Kaladin and Adolin will eventually meet - when that happens, will they be friends? enemies then friends? friends then enemies? or ???

Not re: a prediction, but I canNOT wait to hear her response to the Lift interlude!!

Thanks for sharing all of this with us! :-)

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8 hours ago, Goatbringer said:

Good day one and all! As promised, here is Tay's take on your questions. We will continue to make our way through Words of Radiance and try to contribute regularly in this long, hard 110 day waiting period between now and when Rhythm of War is finally released. In the meantime, enjoy Comedy Stormlight Archive Wife (as she has been graciously dubbed by the members of this forum) once again. 

Tay: Okay, so Szeth is going to like, go and try to kill Dalinar, but Dalinar's "godly goodness" is going to win him over! And he's going to fight by Dalinar's side. 

Me: That's an... interesting take.

This has been censored because of the many swears - just know that these were not Cosmere-appropriate when she said them. 

Tay: Ungh. Sadeas can (verb) my (appendage). He's just going to be stupid and like plotting dumb (excrement) like how to take down Dalinar or take down the King (because I'm pretty sure he still wants to do that). I think he's just going to be plotting and manipulative and stuff behind the scenes. I bet he's going to be really pissy that Dalinar outsmarted him and go away on the battlefield - and he's going to try to take it out on Dalinar in any way he can because he's slimy and underhanded and has a little (appendage).  

Rock Lobsters

Tay: Rock lobsters are a common feature of the... Cosmere? Yes, the Cosmere. I think everybody needs to understand that I have very in-depth knowledge of the - um - flora and fauna of... this... society. 

Me: Would you like to elaborate some more on the flora and fauna of Roshar? Other than rock lobsters of course, since you know so much about them. 

Tay: Oh yes I know all about them. Also there are chorls.

Me: Yes, chulls. Crab-cows.  

Tay: Yes. There are plants that shrink in Highstorms. Yes, that's most of them. I guess you could say I'm a botanical expert. 

Spren

Tay: don't understand spren! This is something I'm still not getting. Spen are giant freakshows that try to terrorise you and kill you like what happen to Jasnah in the prologue and then take you into the Spooky-Spook? But they can also be super cute like Syl and make sassy comments on your shoulder and everyone finds her endearing! OR you can trap them in lamps! I'm not understanding the spren situation and it upsets me. As a result, what kind of spren do I want to see introduced? I don't know! Maybe something that makes sense of what spren are!   

Kadolin

Tay: While I'm really hoping for love at first sight - I don't think that's going to happen. 

*discussion ensues where I remind her that Kaladin and Adolin have met before in Book 1 on two occasions - Sadeas' warcamp and on the Tower where Kaladin does the Bavarian Fire Drill*

Tay: Oh yes! I remember - he sees him on the battlefield and Adolin's all like "who tf this slontze?" Yes. While I want them to fall madly in love with each other at first sight, I don't think that's going to happen. I feel like Adolin's going to be kind of pissy about some low-born guy just swanning in and getting a seat at the table. I think he rates himself a good guy, but he's a judgemental (appendage) really. I also think Adolin's going to be suspicious of Kaladin and his intentions. Why would you just happen to save us - why would you, Slaveboi, risk your own life to save us? Adolin doesn't understand that Kaladin's all magical and stuff and has an honor issue. 

Me: Everyone on Roshar has an honor issue. 

Tay: But yeah, he's going to be super suspicious of Kaladin. And then maybe if they can get past that, they can be homies. But that's Adolin's thing to get over, not Kaladin.  

I saw that you had updated and had a screaming session in my head where I just said Yes! Over and over and over again. Keep up the good work.

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17 hours ago, Goatbringer said:

While I'm really hoping for love at first sight - I don't think that's going to happen. 

But that's Adolin's thing to get over, not Kaladin.  

SHE SHIPS IT! 

Does she think Kaladin still has anything to get over? 

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6 hours ago, AonEne said:

SHE SHIPS IT! 

Does she think Kaladin still has anything to get over? 

Tay: He's gotta get over his 'Savior Complex' - like "Ungh, I didn't save my brother! Ungh, I didn't save my family! Ungh, I didn't save.... uh, bridgemen whose names I've forgotten."  He wants to save everybody. It's just holding you back, Slaveboi - you've got to let yourself soar

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7 hours ago, Goatbringer said:

Tay: He's gotta get over his 'Savior Complex' - like "Ungh, I didn't save my brother! Ungh, I didn't save my family! Ungh, I didn't save.... uh, bridgemen whose names I've forgotten."  He wants to save everybody. It's just holding you back, Slaveboi - you've got to let yourself soar

But he's Saveboi now, because he's not a slave.

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On 7/29/2020 at 4:01 AM, Goatbringer said:

Kadolin

Tay: While I'm really hoping for love at first sight - I don't think that's going to happen. 

*discussion ensues where I remind her that Kaladin and Adolin have met before in Book 1 on two occasions - Sadeas' warcamp and on the Tower where Kaladin does the Bavarian Fire Drill*

Tay: Oh yes! I remember - he sees him on the battlefield and Adolin's all like "who tf this slontze?" Yes. While I want them to fall madly in love with each other at first sight, I don't think that's going to happen. I feel like Adolin's going to be kind of pissy about some low-born guy just swanning in and getting a seat at the table. I think he rates himself a good guy, but he's a judgemental (appendage) really. I also think Adolin's going to be suspicious of Kaladin and his intentions. Why would you just happen to save us - why would you, Slaveboi, risk your own life to save us? Adolin doesn't understand that Kaladin's all magical and stuff and has an honor issue. 

Me: Everyone on Roshar has an honor issue. 

Tay: But yeah, he's going to be super suspicious of Kaladin. And then maybe if they can get past that, they can be homies. But that's Adolin's thing to get over, not Kaladin.  

That is so interesting! It's like she sees Adolin in a similar way to how Kaladin sees him in the book. And I think she (like most of us, probably) is going to be surprised at these two personalities. Plus, what we learn about Adolin throughout the book makes his actions near the end even more shocking (but satisfying too).

(Also, you're right & I was wrong about them meeting for the first time; but in WoR they actually get to know each other. so that's probably where I got confused.)

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On 3/27/2020 at 1:38 AM, Goatbringer said:

TAY: Wait – really? Oh damnation I’m good at this!

Catching on to those Rosharan curse words quickly. :D 

5 minutes ago, Honor is dead said:

- When Bridge Four is training and following orders from Kaladin, Tay likes to sing "I'll Make a Man Out of You" from Mulan. We then had a nice laugh imagining Teft, Rock, and Moash in concubine drag breaking into Kholinar Palace.

:lol::lol::lol:

That is so perfect haha.

Edited by Honor is dead
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7 hours ago, Goatbringer said:

Hello everyone! I can see you’re all eagerly awaiting our next post. I have to admit, it has been a long time coming and we’re only on, like, chapter 9 right now. Basically what happened was that, as you all know, Tay is a high school English teacher, and trying to navigate the weird new world of online and in-person schooling right now is proving to be incredibly exhausting. As a result, it took us six tries to get through chapter one since she fell asleep so fast at the end of the day. Please respect your teachers, folks. They work harder than Kelsier trying to escape the Pits.  

Six tries you guys. I stayed awake through each attempt, so by our last try I could quote most of Shallan’s dialogue.

The point is – we made it through to the other side, and now Tay is on a three-week break from teaching so we can probably get some proper listening in. Here are some of the reactions from the first chapters or Word of Radiance:

--

TAY: Moash is getting his bridge four tattoo on his arm? Don’t you want a bridge four tattoo on your arm?
ME: Yes.
TAY: Ha! So you’d be like Moash! And you hate him for some reason so haha!

--

*Encountering early Pattern bumping into table legs and being generally dumb*

TAY: Man, it would be so fitting for Shallan to have a stupid spren. What is he? An idiotspren? Shallan’s the worst.

--

*After Jasnah’s explanation that spren are the formation of human’s collective observation, Tay spent a good 10 minutes trying to convince me that there must be a Taylor Swift spren because she is thought about so often by humanity, particularly due to her new album*

*I actually couldn’t disagree – could T-Swizzle have a cognitive shadow due to our collective thoughts regarding her? A sort of pop/country tulpa? Do I think about these things too much? Maybe*

*Also - Swiftspren in Kholinar in book 3... it's all coming together.*

--

*Navani scolds Dalinar for his talking about God being dead and says he’ll “end up like Jasnah”*

TAY: Ungh. Navani is just like my mother.
ME: Why?
TAY: She’s acting like if someone is like her daughter it’s the worst thing ever! “Tay, sometimes you can be a bit… intense.”

--

*Tay visibly cringes each time Dalinar and Navani kiss or act lovely together*

--

*Dalinar’s vision of the Thunderclast*

TAY: I like those spren things. They will be skeletonbois.

--

*Honor mentions challenging Odium to a battle of Champions*

TAY: The champion for the good guys is going to be Kaladin, right?
ME: Read and find out!
TAY: I hate you.

*10-minute conversation ensues with her trying to guess who Odium’s champion would be*

--

TAY: I know it’s not going to happen…
ME: You sound apprehensive.
TAY: But I kind of want Dalinar and Kaladin to get together.
ME: No! He’s Kaladin’s father figure, Tay!
TAY: But he keeps talking about getting lost in Dalinar's ‘unfathomable eyes’! So dreamy!

--

TAY: Yes, Shallan. Soulcast the ship into water. What could possibly go wrong with that idea? Idiot.

--

There it is everyone! First reactions from book 2. We may not be going through the books as quickly as the Overlady, but hey, we’re making progress. Things are about to heat up in book 2, so I’m sure we’ll have some fun reactions for you soon!

Journey before destination!

Considering the reaction she had to my question about Sadeas, I bet you'll have to heavily censor her reaction to quite a few of Moash's scenes... 

I hope teaching gets easier!  It's not easy in person, I can't imagine how difficult having to figure out online lessons must be.

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