Introducing The Stormlight Archive to My Wife, or: A Hilarious Series of Names

[Use the Falchion]

49 minutes ago, Goatbringer said:

This is from the latter part of Part 3 to the chapter where Hoid tells Kaladin about the Wandersail. We’re in the home-stretch now, people!

Names:

Tanavast = Tabasco "The spiciest of all the Shards"
Lopen = Gancho 

Hot Takes/Reactions:

Tay was very switched on for the chapter “Child of Tanavast” and inundated me with questions about the Cosmere. I explained the Shattering of Adonalsium to her (“So they straight-up Julius Caesared him?”) as well as Shards, Vessels, Splinters… the whole thing.

In one chapter Kaladin wakes up and "raises a hand to his breast":
TAY: Okay I see. Sexism reversed. Please tell the people of Mind Readers that I officially rescind my statement about Shallan being sexualized as Kaladin is too.
ME: Mind readers?
TAY: Yeah, the website you post my reactions on?
ME: It’s the 17^th Shard – you’ve been on there.
TAY: I feel like I'm close enough.

Tay was very satisfied that Shallan got found out re: stealing Jasnah's Soulcaster and was ditched in the Kharbranth hospital. This feeling is soured, however, since she knows Shallan is the flashback character in book 2 (I talk about these books too much).

Tay was insanely upset that Kaladin ditched the Shardblade after winning it in Alethkar. She, quite astutely, compared it to coming into a fortune’s worth of Nazi gold. While it is a tainted treasure, it could definitely be donated to a Jewish charity or something to try to do good with it. Admittedly, he tried to give it to a darkeyes, but Amaram dealt with that. 

Later on that night, Tay was chopping something with a knife:
TAY: Hey look, I’m Kaladin.
*drops the knife and walks away*
TAY: *under her breath*: Idiot.

She was also blown away by Amaram’s betrayal of Kal. This followed:
TAY: I want a spoiler. Does Slaveboi get to kill Amaram?
ME: Do you want a full explanation or a yes/no?
TAY: Just a yes or a no.
ME: No.
TAY: Damnation!

Dalinar noticing that the Parshendi fight in male/female teams:
“This has led to the belief that there are no dwarf women!” - Sneakly little LotR reference for ya.

My last little thing was that I decided to quiz Tay on who was in the Bridge Four poster that was released by Team Sanderson earlier today and, well, she was actually pretty spot-on with most of her guesses. I thought it would be funnier, but as much as she would deny it, I think she’s super into Stormlight now. Guess I’ve succeeded guys! We'll probably have one last post with her reactions to the end of the book that should come within the next couple weeks. 

Here are her guesses, incidentally.

WOOT WOOT ONE OF US! ONE OF US! If your wife thinks Tabasco is the "spiciest of all shards," I can't wait for you to explain Autonomy to her. She did a great job with the movie poster cast! Granted, Renarin would be pretty impossible to guess right now, good jobs all around! 

Thank you again for posting these - they are hilarious and we love them. 

[Elsecaller_17.5]

2 hours ago, Goatbringer said:

She was also blown away by Amaram’s betrayal of Kal. This followed:
TAY: I want a spoiler. Does Slaveboi get to kill Amaram?
ME: Do you want a full explanation or a yes/no?
TAY: Just a yes or a no.
ME: No.
TAY: Damnation!

Hehehe.

[Frustration]

3 hours ago, Goatbringer said:

Tay was insanely upset that Kaladin ditched the Shardblade after winning it in Alethkar. She, quite astutely, compared it to coming into a fortune’s worth of Nazi gold. While it is a tainted treasure, it could definitely be donated to a Jewish charity or something to try to do good with it. Admittedly, he tried to give it to a darkeyes, but Amaram dealt with that. 

Later on that night, Tay was chopping something with a knife:
TAY: Hey look, I’m Kaladin.
*drops the knife and walks away*
TAY: *under her breath*: Idiot.

 

Well she doesn't understand what a Shardblade is yet, so I can't be too mad, whew, calm yourself. *Whispers* it was Syl.

[Karger]

6 hours ago, Goatbringer said:

ME: Mind readers?

We do occasionally read minds. 

[datalaughing]

Quote

Later on that night, Tay was chopping something with a knife:
TAY: Hey look, I’m Kaladin.
*drops the knife and walks away*
TAY: *under her breath*: Idiot.

Truth be told, I felt that way the first time I read that scene too.

[Karger]

9 hours ago, Goatbringer said:

Tay was insanely upset that Kaladin ditched the Shardblade after winning it in Alethkar. She, quite astutely, compared it to coming into a fortune’s worth of Nazi gold. While it is a tainted treasure, it could definitely be donated to a Jewish charity or something to try to do good with it. Admittedly, he tried to give it to a darkeyes, but Amaram dealt with that. 

1 hour ago, datalaughing said:

Truth be told, I felt that way the first time I read that scene too.

That is not a wrong way to think of it but Kaladin sees the shards as an atrocity like a bio weapon.  He is to depressed to to believe that the shards would be better off with him so he ditches them in favor of someone who thinks they have a shot. That being said the story of what would have happened if Kaladin had picked up the shards and walked into camp with them so that everyone knew would be interesting. 

Edited May 6, 2020 by Karger

[Iarwainiel I]

 

@Goatbringer this recent post https://www.17thshard.com/forum/topic/89882-peeps-before-death/ (stunningly brilliant dirama! + tasty!)

reminded me of this excellent LEGO creation https://www.tor.com/2014/03/21/the-way-of-kings-as-interpreted-through-lego/

When you get to the Battle of the Tower, maybe share these with your dear wife?

[Now I want some Peeps, but the shops are all closed...]

Edited May 7, 2020 by old aggie

[king of nowhere]

5 hours ago, Karger said:

That is not a wrong way to think of it but Kaladin sees the shards as an atrocity like a bio weapon.  He is to depressed to to believe that the shards would be better off with him so he ditches them in favor of someone who thinks they have a shot. That being said the story of what would have happened if Kaladin had picked up the shards and walked into camp with them so that everyone knew would be interesting. 

actually, it was more or less the first scene brandon had written, in what we call way of kings prime.

and brandon ended up ditching that because the character was not interesting.

that said, it was still an idiotic decision.

Edited May 7, 2020 by king of nowhere

[Karger]

Just now, king of nowhere said:

actually, it was more or less the first scene brandon had written, in what we call way of kings prime.

Not exactly what I was going for.  Prime has other issues.  What I was going for was making Kaladin more of a Ronnin figure.  He would learn to use his shards and then instead of going to the plains would do the more classic errantry wandering around Alethkar and picking up the slack that none of the other highprinces are doing maybe starting a correspondence with other important alethi figures like Dalinar and Jasnah. 

[The Deity]

I have no idea why, but her giving Lopen the "Gancho" title is the most Lopen thing to do.

[Vissy]

On 3/13/2020 at 9:31 AM, Goatbringer said:

- Kaladin and Syl are going to fall in love.

You cannot escape Syladin!

[AonEne]

19 hours ago, Frustration said:

Well she doesn't understand what a Shardblade is yet, so I can't be too mad, whew, calm yourself. *Whispers* it was Syl.

If I’m remembering correctly, it was actually Rock. 

(Ah yes, my favorite Bridge Four character, Who’s In Bridge Four Again. He’s the best.) 

[Frustration]

4 hours ago, AonEne said:

If I’m remembering correctly, it was actually Rock. 

(Ah yes, my favorite Bridge Four character, Who’s In Bridge Four Again. He’s the best.) 

I was referring to him rejecting the blade but that's my opinion.

[AonEne]

4 minutes ago, Frustration said:

I was referring to him rejecting the blade but that's my opinion.

Whoops, I think I was looking at the wrong quote from the post above. My bad.

[Goatbringer]

We’ve done it Cosmerenauts!

We have finished The Adventures of Slaveboi! What a wild ride it’s been… we’ve had a whole lot of fun and the journey really has been more enjoyable than the destination. There’s been a whole lot of stuff that went on with us around the end of the book, so buckle up:

So the first bit of news is: I’ve been fired as narrator.

Just to give you some background, in the wake of COVID-19, the South African government was proactive and decided to go onto a full lockdown on 1 April – meaning only the most essential trips out of your home were justified: no going for runs, no going to a bookstore… everything was closed except for like pharmacies and grocery stores. Anyways, on 1 May, the lockdown started lifting in phases, so Tay and I decided that we would start to talk morning walks around our neighbourhood again. Since we’re in the homestretch of The Way of Kings, Tay asked if there was an audiobook of it so that she could listen to it as she walked. I said there was, and downloaded Graphic Audio’s version of it.

One minute into the first chapter she listened to and I was fired. A voice cast? Sound effects? Musical accompaniment? Damnation, it is something else.

So long story short, we just listened to the ending on graphic audio and had a lot of fun doing so.  

HOT TAKES ON THE ENDING:

When she realizes Sadeas is abandoning Dalinar at the Tower, as opposed to her intense reaction to Amaram taking Kaladin’s Shards, the only reaction she gave was a little: “Huh. What a dick.”

She was absolutely blindsided by Taravangian being Szeth’s master. I’ll admit that this was a great twist that I definitely take for granted now ten years after having read it for the first time. Fantastic writing.

She came up with her own theory! So admittedly, this was a theory she gave right before the chapter where Jasnah tells Shallan her theory about the Voidbringers, but it’s a pretty decent theory anyways:

She knows that from how the Parshendi reacted to Kaladin being “Super Saiyan” at the Tower, they obviously have knowledge of the Knights Radiant or are tied to them somehow. She thinks that they are behind the war and killed Gavilar in order to make chaos on a grand scale so that the Radiants are forced to return due to the chaotic nature of the world. She knows that Odium is involved somehow, but can’t place it. However, she doesn’t think the Parshendi have anything to do with Odium. I think this is a really good theory – she’s obviously got the details right but the conclusions wrong as

Spoiler

This sounds exactly like what the Sons of Honor were trying to do, and a lesser extent the Envisagers in causing chaos and danger in order for the Radiants to return.

And then… we got to the end. She loves the idea of the Parshmen being the Voidbringers ("I told you Odium had something to do with it!") and that Princess Jasmine is out to save the world, and likes the idea of Slaveboi being Guardboi to Dalinar. Tay gave it a solid 3 out of 5 but said she wasn’t entirely sure she’d read the second book. Fair enough, I thought... I'd been hounding her for years to read it and now she'd given it a good ol' fashioned shot and liked it, but wasn't sure she was going to commit to nine more books. 

So (time for the second bit of big news) I then summarized the entire second book for her the day after we finished book 1. By the time I had finished and explained Wit’s epilogue with Jasnah, two hours had passed, my throat was completely dry and I was trying to figure out how to explain what Nightblood was to her without needing to explain the entire magic system of Warbreaker to her (she was getting frustrated with how convoluted Surgebinding was… I wasn’t about to explain Awakening). What was her reaction after I had finished narrating the entirety of Words of Radiance?

“Well if I had known it was going to be that exciting, I would have listened to the audiobook!”

Derp.

Anyways, she’s decided that she’s still interested in where the books go, except now that she knows the entire plot of the second book she’s not about to go through 60 hours of narration (even if it’s top quality) – so she wants to listen to some of the key scenes that are like the ‘greatest hits’ of Words of Radiance… the scenes that she found most exciting when I described them to her. Here’s what I was thinking:

- The attack on the Wind’s Pleasure
- Szeth attacking the Pinnacle after the Highstorm
- Adolin & Kaladin vs Four Shardbearers
- Lift’s interlude
- Kaladin & Shallan’s banter in the chasms where Kaladin low-key falls in love with her
- Kaladin & Shallan fight off the Rock Lobster
- Kaladin speaking the Third Ideal
- The Sanderlanche in general from where Dalinar and co get to Narak to being transported to Urithiru
- Adolin giving Sadeas the ol’ stabby-stab
- Wit & Jasnah’s epilogue

What about you guys? What are your ‘can’t miss scenes’ from Words of Radiance?

[LordTheodore]

1 hour ago, Goatbringer said:

What about you guys? What are your ‘can’t miss scenes’ from Words of Radiance?

All of them

[Shard of Reading]

4 hours ago, Goatbringer said:

What about you guys? What are your ‘can’t miss scenes’ from Words of Radiance?

When Kaladin fights Szeth in the highstorm.

Kaladin swearing the third oath.

Dalinar fighting Szeth

The story of Fleet.

[Use the Falchion]

4 hours ago, Goatbringer said:

We’ve done it Cosmerenauts!

We have finished The Adventures of Slaveboi! What a wild ride it’s been… we’ve had a whole lot of fun and the journey really has been more enjoyable than the destination. There’s been a whole lot of stuff that went on with us around the end of the book, so buckle up:

So the first bit of news is: I’ve been fired as narrator.

Just to give you some background, in the wake of COVID-19, the South African government was proactive and decided to go onto a full lockdown on 1 April – meaning only the most essential trips out of your home were justified: no going for runs, no going to a bookstore… everything was closed except for like pharmacies and grocery stores. Anyways, on 1 May, the lockdown started lifting in phases, so Tay and I decided that we would start to talk morning walks around our neighbourhood again. Since we’re in the homestretch of The Way of Kings, Tay asked if there was an audiobook of it so that she could listen to it as she walked. I said there was, and downloaded Graphic Audio’s version of it.

One minute into the first chapter she listened to and I was fired. A voice cast? Sound effects? Musical accompaniment? Damnation, it is something else.

So long story short, we just listened to the ending on graphic audio and had a lot of fun doing so.  

HOT TAKES ON THE ENDING:

When she realizes Sadeas is abandoning Dalinar at the Tower, as opposed to her intense reaction to Amaram taking Kaladin’s Shards, the only reaction she gave was a little: “Huh. What a dick.”

She was absolutely blindsided by Taravangian being Szeth’s master. I’ll admit that this was a great twist that I definitely take for granted now ten years after having read it for the first time. Fantastic writing.

She came up with her own theory! So admittedly, this was a theory she gave right before the chapter where Jasnah tells Shallan her theory about the Voidbringers, but it’s a pretty decent theory anyways:

She knows that from how the Parshendi reacted to Kaladin being “Super Saiyan” at the Tower, they obviously have knowledge of the Knights Radiant or are tied to them somehow. She thinks that they are behind the war and killed Gavilar in order to make chaos on a grand scale so that the Radiants are forced to return due to the chaotic nature of the world. She knows that Odium is involved somehow, but can’t place it. However, she doesn’t think the Parshendi have anything to do with Odium. I think this is a really good theory – she’s obviously got the details right but the conclusions wrong as

  Reveal hidden contents

This sounds exactly like what the Sons of Honor were trying to do, and a lesser extent the Envisagers in causing chaos and danger in order for the Radiants to return.

And then… we got to the end. She loves the idea of the Parshmen being the Voidbringers ("I told you Odium had something to do with it!") and that Princess Jasmine is out to save the world, and likes the idea of Slaveboi being Guardboi to Dalinar. Tay gave it a solid 3 out of 5 but said she wasn’t entirely sure she’d read the second book. Fair enough, I thought... I'd been hounding her for years to read it and now she'd given it a good ol' fashioned shot and liked it, but wasn't sure she was going to commit to nine more books. 

So (time for the second bit of big news) I then summarized the entire second book for her the day after we finished book 1. By the time I had finished and explained Wit’s epilogue with Jasnah, two hours had passed, my throat was completely dry and I was trying to figure out how to explain what Nightblood was to her without needing to explain the entire magic system of Warbreaker to her (she was getting frustrated with how convoluted Surgebinding was… I wasn’t about to explain Awakening). What was her reaction after I had finished narrating the entirety of Words of Radiance?

“Well if I had known it was going to be that exciting, I would have listened to the audiobook!”

Derp.

Anyways, she’s decided that she’s still interested in where the books go, except now that she knows the entire plot of the second book she’s not about to go through 60 hours of narration (even if it’s top quality) – so she wants to listen to some of the key scenes that are like the ‘greatest hits’ of Words of Radiance… the scenes that she found most exciting when I described them to her. Here’s what I was thinking:

- The attack on the Wind’s Pleasure
- Szeth attacking the Pinnacle after the Highstorm
- Adolin & Kaladin vs Four Shardbearers
- Lift’s interlude
- Kaladin & Shallan’s banter in the chasms where Kaladin low-key falls in love with her
- Kaladin & Shallan fight off the Rock Lobster
- Kaladin speaking the Third Ideal
- The Sanderlanche in general from where Dalinar and co get to Narak to being transported to Urithiru
- Adolin giving Sadeas the ol’ stabby-stab
- Wit & Jasnah’s epilogue

What about you guys? What are your ‘can’t miss scenes’ from Words of Radiance?

Big YAY and Big OOF. But you did your best with the information you had! As others have added, Kaladin's imprisonment (including Wit's story and Adolin's imprisonment), Kaladin learning to ride a horse, Eshonai and Venli interludes, and maybe the one with Ym.

[AonEne]

Taln’s interlude! And any time Hoid shows up, including that Shallan flashback. The flashbacks in general - they might get her to feel a little more sympathy for her. The prologue. Taravangian’s interlude. Honestly, all of it. 

[+Q10fanatic]

Shallan meeting Kaladin. Shallan meeting the Alethi.Shallan using the Pattern-blade in the caravan.

[Aminar]

Try to convince her that she'll miss lots of hidden details if she only hears the best parts. Especially with Shallan's arc, so much of the emotion in Kaladin's recognition of her pain comes from those uncomfortable dark flashbacks. I have no idea what Licensing is like in your area, but the more standard audiobook is only like 48 hours long and if you train her to speed up can be done much quicker than that.(Graphic audio is great but I often find that the attempts at filmifying just don't work because the soundmixing for the voices never feels like its actually in the described space. When you don't try for that it at least feels more natural. I have no idea where your wife sits on portrayl of Trauma but the Stormlight Archive has some of the best deepest most hopeful takes on it out there. And Audiobooks are great for all kinds of chores. You could always try to convince her that chore-time becomes also audiobook time where you throw the audiobook on while you two clean/do dishes/etc. Its great if you're bad at home maintenance because it incentives the work and its great if you're good at it because it becomes a communal activity. But I'd seriously try to get her to read WoR. There's so much that she'll miss.

[Frustration]

Everyone saying WoR made Shallan better is wrong, the best parts of the book aren't even about her.

As to highlights to read, just read all of it, it's better that way.

Also @Goatbringer you need to get your job back this one just wasn't as good as the others.

[Aminar]

28 minutes ago, Frustration said:

Everyone saying WoR made Shallan better is wrong, the best parts of the book aren't even about her.

As to highlights to read, just read all of it, it's better that way.

Also @Goatbringer you need to get your job back this one just wasn't as good as the others.

Sorry man but no. The best written most poignant parts of the book are about Shallan. You don't have to like her but the amazing way it details how she became who she is is a masterclass in keeping hope amidst dark dark subject matter.

[Frustration]

19 minutes ago, Aminar said:

Sorry man but no. The best written most poignant parts of the book are about Shallan. You don't have to like her but the amazing way it details how she became who she is is a masterclass in keeping hope amidst dark dark subject matter.

Best parts are about Kaladin: fighting Szeth, the arena, saying the third ideal etc.

    Shallan's backstory was meh, at best, and she acts like a different person back then. I never have cared about Shallan and this book didn't change that in fact it might have made it worse.

     And dark subject matter, have you read Oathbringer, that is dark, what Shallan went through nope. People keep saying Shallan's past is dark and perhapse in the real world I would agree, but compared to the Titans of Dalinar and Kaladin she has nothing.

[Aminar]

1 minute ago, Frustration said:

Best parts are about Kaladin: fighting Szeth, the arena, saying the third ideal etc.

    Shallan's backstory was meh, at best, and she acts like a different person back then. I never have cared about Shallan and this book didn't change that in fact it might have made it worse.

     And dark subject matter, have you read Oathbringer, that is dark, what Shallan went through nope. People keep saying Shallan's past is dark and perhapse in the real world I would agree, but compared to the Titans of Dalinar and Kaladin she has nothing.

Shallan's struggles are real struggles people have. I work with those people. I help those people. Not many people are out there waging war. That's a far less human problem and it distances people from its effects. War may be dark, but domestic violence is a much bigger and closer to home problem for most of the planet. Fighting for you life is understandable. Beating your helpless family is not. That said, Dalinar's arc in Oathbringer is also fantastic. But they take trauma from very different angles and that's important because trauma hits everyone different.

As for Kaladin's arc... Sorry but no. Kaladin is whiny, petulent, and bigoted through most of that book. He's being an idiot. Him realizing that and finally being a good person is a relief, not epic. And Shallan leads him straight to those realizations in the chasm.