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What’s the Weirdest Thing You’ve Heard Other People Say About You?


Draginon

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So like the title says what’s the weirdest or strangest thing you’ve heard someone say about you?

I’ll start. One of the weirdest I’ve had was a teacher at the school I work at think I was both a student and that my mom was my wife! What leaps of logic brought her to the choice of “Young enough to be in middle school but old enough to be married to someone in their 60’s”? Also the married assumption happened because apparently she’s never seen two people with the same last name and it automatically means husband and wife and I guess assumed all her students were married to their parents by her logic.

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Oh that's a can of worms and a half. I've had people tell me I'm immortal, tell me I'm the Antichrist, tell me I'm secretly a time traveller (even from myself, apparently), tell me I'll be dead before the year is out, tell me I'll live into my two hundreds, tell me I'll visit space, tell me the depths of the ocean are where I'm supposed to be, tell me that everything I'll do will stand in stone for a thousand years, tell me that everything I'll do will turn to dust before my very eyes, tell me I'm their long-lost husband of 30 years with amnesia, tell me I'm literally dead, tell me I'm the Second Coming of Christ (long story on that one), and tell me that my soul has seen guilt over the ages and it ages me prematurely. 

Long story short, shenanigans. 

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1 hour ago, Invocation said:

Oh that's a can of worms and a half. I've had people tell me I'm immortal, tell me I'm the Antichrist, tell me I'm secretly a time traveller (even from myself, apparently), tell me I'll be dead before the year is out, tell me I'll live into my two hundreds, tell me I'll visit space, tell me the depths of the ocean are where I'm supposed to be, tell me that everything I'll do will stand in stone for a thousand years, tell me that everything I'll do will turn to dust before my very eyes, tell me I'm their long-lost husband of 30 years with amnesia, tell me I'm literally dead, tell me I'm the Second Coming of Christ (long story on that one), and tell me that my soul has seen guilt over the ages and it ages me prematurely. 

Long story short, shenanigans. 

To be fair, if you are immortal then your work can still stand for a thousand years as well as turn to dust before your eyes ... :-P

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Regarding Facebook profiles circa 2005, a classmate told me: “You should set your sexual orientation to ‘Robot’.”

By which I figure he meant that I don’t come across as much of a horndog, and not that he thinks I got the hots for teh bots.  But I considered it weird anyway.

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6 hours ago, Invocation said:

Oh that's a can of worms and a half. I've had people tell me I'm immortal, tell me I'm the Antichrist, tell me I'm secretly a time traveller (even from myself, apparently), tell me I'll be dead before the year is out, tell me I'll live into my two hundreds, tell me I'll visit space, tell me the depths of the ocean are where I'm supposed to be, tell me that everything I'll do will stand in stone for a thousand years, tell me that everything I'll do will turn to dust before my very eyes, tell me I'm their long-lost husband of 30 years with amnesia, tell me I'm literally dead, tell me I'm the Second Coming of Christ (long story on that one), and tell me that my soul has seen guilt over the ages and it ages me prematurely. 

Long story short, shenanigans. 

I really want to know the context of these.

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"So, wait. You're a four year old demon baby, and you throw ties at people?"

"But have you considered that you might be a demon?"

"You're such an Earth muffin."

"You amphibious bottle of shoes!"

"You have the brain equivalent of a donkey fried with a Shard of knowledge."

There is way to much context around these to even begin explaining them.

Edited by ChickenLiberty
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I've had three separate people come up to me over the years and begin speaking Romanian to me. Upon learning that I do not speak Romanian and indeed am not Romanian at all (to the best of my knowledge) these people always express genuine surprise and tell me I "simply must be." 

Again, as far as I can tell, I have exactly zero Romanian heritage and I don't even look particularly Romanian by my cursory Google searches :P 

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1 hour ago, Ammanas said:

My wife complains about me being a “visionary man”. My two sons also murmur against me for the same reason.

Seriously though it was probably when someone said I sounded exactly like Bill Parcells. I was around 17 and he (Bill) was probably around 65 at the time.

Just make sure you give them good blessings when you die. Not kandra spike kinds, though I guess that works too.

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This isn’t necessarily weird, but I have a (very small) fan base. I was in the TMEA All-state symphony orchestra this year, and I played 2nd bass clarinet in The Rite of Spring. There is a non-zero amount of people who are more obsessed with me than is really necessary. It’s weird because like these people talk about me as if I’m some sort of bass clarinet god or something.

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On 9/11/2019 at 11:35 AM, Ammanas said:

My wife complains about me being a “visionary man”. My two sons also murmur against me for the same reason.

You didn't try to name a river and a valley after your two sons to help that did you?

I don't know if this counts, but to a specific subset of people, I'm known as "Professor Cardigan" for reasons that are long and complicated.

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40 minutes ago, Lord Furret said:

At my school, a person who doesn't like me decided to tell everyone I was going to shoot up the school. Needless to say, I am now in trouble for that, but hopefully I can clear everything up.

Oh my gosh, no! I hope you can explain to them that the kid was just being a jerk and that you would never do anything like that. 

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23 hours ago, Lord Furret said:

At my school, a person who doesn't like me decided to tell everyone I was going to shoot up the school. Needless to say, I am now in trouble for that, but hopefully I can clear everything up.

Faith in Humanity -1000.

So today I got compared to a scalpel- which was interesting to say the least.

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