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Mandamon

20190701 - Facets of the Nether Ch 21 & Epilogue - 6094 words - Sub 20

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Hello all!

Alrighty--last one! Again, I apologize for the 6000 words, but this is the end! 

All comments are welcome, but please especially let me know what doesn't tie up satisfactorily for you, and if I didn't fulfill any promises, save what will be in book 3, of course.

Have at it!


Previously: E coaxed S out of his room after a strange chime went off. The maji are interested in S's new house. R got some information from a source, and M wants to restart the Society. R reveals the location of the Coalition's headquarters, but can't get there, and everyone is called to the Assembly, where the Coalition unveils an ancient being. E and R discuss the revelation, S visits the Eff in a private audience, and M continues recruiting. Re manages to meet with the coalition, learns E and I's true species, and confronts E. E trades herself for I and S takes I in.
The rest of the cast gathers at the wall, and meet the Eff. They learn some new things, then the chime stops as something comes through the wall. We go back to E, who discovers the Coalition's headquarters, and meets some new, strange friends. Back to S and Co at the wall, who finally find out what the chime was all about. We drop in on M, who showed the new two-house recruits what's he'd been doing. Meanwhile, S and I go through the wall with WW, and find out what's on the other side. E learns about her species from the others, and fends off an assault. Re observes one of the LC attack the Eff, but discovers a way to create a portal to their base.
Meanwhile, S and I explore the new facet with WW, and meet the ruler of that facet. M and co start work on the Device, and E learns more about the L.C. S and WW go to a new House, and Sam learns about a surprising ability. We switch to R and Co, who are infiltrating the LC's headquarters, where they come across a room of surprising artifacts. M and crew activate the device, but something goes wrong. Meanwhile, S also gets a feeling something big is about to occur, and E escapes with the other Ari.

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Oooh! Final chapter!

Overall

I'm...confused, mostly. Is it being insinuated that the voice S hears is a three house magus (and that S also is) and also probably evil? If not, I don't know what the point is of any of the Mand stuff, since nothing ever seems to come of it. The conflict with Ril and the Life Coalition seemed to fizzle pretty fast and I think I missed some motivations somewhere, or maybe WRS. 

I'm not clear, looking back, what the arc was for this book. I know it needs to set up book three (set up established) but it also needs a narrative of its own, yes? It's that narrative that I can't see. Sa got to kiss (yay!) and E/I got to use their powers, and R is evil. These are all fine. If the arc is supposed to be the evolution of the apprentices then, it would make sense for the book to wholly focus on their evolution, and much less on Mand and various other POVs.

I guess I'm not sure what this book gave me, in terms of closure. I have a lot of new questions but not too many answers. I think I might need something more substantial in terms of arc payoff. I'm still heavily invested in most of the characters, and I do love Sa's growth, but I need more meat, I'm afraid, before moving to the next course.

As I go

- pg 2: villains are a little mustachio-twirling here at the start

- pg 3: where are all the Ari right now?

- pg 5: was kind of hoping Sa might come out of the drain instead of the jello-monster

This Eff, BP, was an Ari like CV. Redundant. We already know this

- pg 12: ah, the random voice from book one returns!

- wait, how did the Ari get here? WRS? Weren't they all fighting?

- I do like the E and I reunion.

For an extinct species, there sure were a lot of them. LOL!

- well Re that...escalated quickly...

- .... I'm still not entirely certain what Mand's purpose is in this book

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Posted (edited)

I have mixed feelings about this. All the POV switching was satisfying in the sense that it allowed me to feel like I had a complete sense of how everyone was coming together. It was bring everyone's threads together all at once and the little bits of overlap transitioned well. On the other hand, it felt like it moved to quick and the constant jumping was making it hard to engage on the level I would want to be for the last chapter. I'm not 100% sure if this would've happened had I read it from begining to end over the course of a day or two like I do with novels.

I know this is going to sound vague, but I feel like I am missing something from the end and I really am not sure what it is or how to ask a more specific question to find out what it is.

20 hours ago, kais said:

I'm not clear, looking back, what the arc was for this book.

 

20 hours ago, kais said:

I guess I'm not sure what this book gave me, in terms of closure. I have a lot of new questions but not too many answers. I think I might need something more substantial in terms of arc payoff.

I think this might be part of what I am missing. The characters were all scattered, and they came together. Some of them grew and changed, and maybe a few threads resolved, like the E I S trio is back together and each member is a little evolved, but I feel like those were more subplots for individual POVs and not an arc for the whole book. 

If the rescue mission was supposed to be the big thing, then I feel like it kind of got lost in everything else that was going on. 

I just have this sense of things come together in a rushed manner, introducing something new and end abruptly without me knowing what was really resolved, if anything. It really didn't feel like an ending. 

Also, the voice coming back was a little jarring. I'd almost forgotten about it even though it was mentioned a couple times.

And what about the Dissolution? That wasn't mentioned in this last chapter or in the epilogue and I thought stopping that was one of the main goals these characters had. 

Edited to add:

I do want to reiterate that I love that everyone is together in the one place for this and the general concept of it could work with better set up and some tightening.

Slightly prescriptive and very ignorable comments / questions: Is there anyway to have a chapter where things feel resolved? A moment where everyone thinks they are more or less okay, and then this thing comes when they are all in one place already? Like as soon as they think they're safe and resolved, boom! They actually aren't.

More prescriptiveness:

What if it initially seemed like nothing came through the void? What if Sam felt something first, then the others arrived in the Eff's room thinking they've gotten away from the LC...then the LC shows up with this thing or pursued by it?

I feel like I'm not being super helpful, but the ending didn't quite work how I hoped even though I love these characters and this world. This wouldn't stop me from reading book 3, but I'd be grumbling about for a while. 

 

Edited by shatteredsmooth
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Over all, add me into the "feeling ambivalent with the ending" camp as well. @kais reminded me recently that this is the second book in this series, and looking back, I think that explains some of my sense of dissatisfaction with it. This whole thing seems to be suffering from second-book syndrome, where setting up the pieces for book 3 takes precedence over any real story or resolution happening in this book on its own. This feels like book 3, part 1, not a book 2 in its own right. I think it needs its own plot and character arcs that function away from setting people and locations into place for book 3, and looking back, I'm having a hard time thinking of anything that really fits that description in this. 

 

As I go: 

Is this O epigraph the same as the one last week? It feels very similar...

Ri is still feeling out of character for me. This version seems like a different person from the last time I saw her POV. I still think, of the two, I'd rather have O as the adult POV in this book, if one is necessary. Couldn't this scene be told as well from Re? I dislike him, but his POV would at least provide some consistency. 

This is the first I'm hearing of the prophesy, too. It feels too convenient to me.  Did it come up last book? If they're fanatics, and this is their guiding principal, how did they keep from telling anyone, ever, about it? 

Ri and her hand fetish. lol.  I am amused by that, but I am definitely not feeling much of any wonder out of this potential-superbaby/3house arrival. It just kind of pops up as a thing here in these last few chapters and there's just not been enough time for me to feel like this is a big deal. 

"I guess he’s sort of a relation to you, isn’t he?” -- Gentle reminder that not every minority is related to every other minority. Also, isn't this kind of like implying that every human is related to every other human? I mean, insofar as they are the same species, but that's not what's being meant here, is it? Did I miss the part where the queen said she was directly related to In somehow? 

"hadn’t been able to stop them"  -- Why would E want to leave people, any people, to torture and slavery of the kind she has herself witnessed? I'm not going to belabor the point this time, but it seems endemic to E and the Ari and it's not great. 

"They hadn’t, yet" -- Why would they? 

"They weren’t attacking, which meant they were waiting" -- At least I believe this sort of essentialist nonsense out of Ri more than I do out of E. 

I'm not sure what to make of Re's murder. Honestly, I'd've liked to have spent more time with him if this is supposed to be feeling momentous or important. I think right now I'm settling more on callous and yet another reason why I don't like him. Plus, I feel like I've barely even met this J person. Were they prominent in the first book? I don't understand why that one had to die, when, honestly, from the info I've read in this book, it's N who's the greatest threat and de facto leader. Has J actually done anything in front of Re to make Re want to kill them? N definitely has, since, at the very least, Re watched him attack the Eff... 

So they summoned the borg? I am again unsure what to make of this. It feels anticlimactic, and maybe a little unsupported. At least this meeting wasn't just talking? 

I'm unsure why M's section was there at the end. It didn't seem to do much to help the main plot and didn't feel like a strong end.

 

 

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Thanks to @kais, @shatteredsmooth, and @industrialistDragon!

16 hours ago, shatteredsmooth said:
On 7/2/2019 at 7:09 PM, kais said:

I'm not clear, looking back, what the arc was for this book.

 

On 7/2/2019 at 7:09 PM, kais said:

I guess I'm not sure what this book gave me, in terms of closure. I have a lot of new questions but not too many answers. I think I might need something more substantial in terms of arc payoff.

I think this might be part of what I am missing. The characters were all scattered, and they came together. Some of them grew and changed, and maybe a few threads resolved, like the E I S trio is back together and each member is a little evolved, but I feel like those were more subplots for individual POVs and not an arc for the whole book. 

 

12 hours ago, industrialistDragon said:

This whole thing seems to be suffering from second-book syndrome, where setting up the pieces for book 3 takes precedence over any real story or resolution happening in this book on its own

Great comments. Thanks for pointing this out. I think I really need to figure out which thread I want to focus on more and bump that up so this book doesn't feel too "sidequesty"

On 7/2/2019 at 7:09 PM, kais said:

The conflict with Ril and the Life Coalition seemed to fizzle pretty fast and I think I missed some motivations somewhere, or maybe WRS. 

 

12 hours ago, industrialistDragon said:

This is the first I'm hearing of the prophesy, too. It feels too convenient to me.  Did it come up last book? If they're fanatics, and this is their guiding principal, how did they keep from telling anyone, ever, about it? 

I think this will actually be my main plot thread going forward, so I need to add a lot more about this. There was a lot in the original draft of the first book on this which also got cut. I thought I could place it in book 2 but looks like I need to bring it forward a lot.

 

16 hours ago, shatteredsmooth said:

Is there anyway to have a chapter where things feel resolved? A moment where everyone thinks they are more or less okay, and then this thing comes when they are all in one place already? Like as soon as they think they're safe and resolved, boom! They actually aren't.

Hmm...that might be a better way to do this, especially if I bump up the threat from the LC more.

16 hours ago, shatteredsmooth said:

What if it initially seemed like nothing came through the void? What if Sam felt something first, then the others arrived in the Eff's room thinking they've gotten away from the LC...then the LC shows up with this thing or pursued by it?

That could also work, if the main cast runs away from what they've done in the shard room, but the LC seeks them out, pursued by the new critter.

12 hours ago, industrialistDragon said:

Ri is still feeling out of character for me. This version seems like a different person from the last time I saw her POV. I still think, of the two, I'd rather have O as the adult POV in this book, if one is necessary. Couldn't this scene be told as well from Re? I dislike him, but his POV would at least provide some consistency. 

Good point. I'm still debating the POV split between Ri, Re, and O, so I'll have to play with this.

12 hours ago, industrialistDragon said:

Gentle reminder that not every minority is related to every other minority

Definitely. This was more meant that the twins had felt a connection to the Eff, especially since the gene pool of their species is so small.

12 hours ago, industrialistDragon said:

I'm not sure what to make of Re's murder. Honestly, I'd've liked to have spent more time with him if this is supposed to be feeling momentous or important. I think right now I'm settling more on callous and yet another reason why I don't like him. Plus, I feel like I've barely even met this J person. Were they prominent in the first book? I don't understand why that one had to die, when, honestly, from the info I've read in this book, it's N who's the greatest threat and de facto leader. Has J actually done anything in front of Re to make Re want to kill them? N definitely has, since, at the very least, Re watched him attack the Eff... 

I think this may be some idiot plotting from me, trying to force the situation I want in the next book. I'll take a look at this and see if I can make it smoother.

On 7/2/2019 at 7:09 PM, kais said:

I don't know what the point is of any of the Mand stuff, since nothing ever seems to come of it.

Yeah, I really really like his thread, but as you said, this may be something that needs to turn into the epigraphs for the whole book to describe his journey in the background, and then put all his POVs into a novella about restarting the Society. I'll have to mull this over.

17 hours ago, shatteredsmooth said:

I feel like I'm not being super helpful,

You are, in fact, incredibly helpful, @shatteredsmooth!

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(page 1)

- "the results they enact on this universe are simply a side-effect?" - I like this conclusion a good deal, but... 'results' is a very emotive word, consistent then for a 'scientist' to use that word, but this is the last chapter: I'm looking for drama, something like 'destruction', maybe?

- "trained in martial arts" - this is a bit vague/inspecific, and therefore less engaging. Can it be more specific in terms of names of martial arts, or style, or something?

- "for one proficient" - This reads like R is the proficient one, but the sense of the sentence (grammar) is that it's N. Confused.

- "should we be attending to whatever the Drain is doing?" - argh, more tension, more urgency. This is out of character, IMO. O would be demanding her attention, surely, not timidly (seeming) asking her in this way, IMO.

- "Now the void had proved"

- "who had shown up" - Urgency! Drama!* Like, 'who had burst into the room', or whatever.

[* I know we've had this discussion before about how you work by ramping up tension and drama in the consequent drafts. Having said that, I"M STILL GOING TO CALL IT!! :D  I shall use the abbreviation NED (=Not Enough Drama).]

- "watched her back" - chance to show his mood, loathing, angry contemptuous.

- "was squirming, and growing" - R has her gaze locked with N, so how is she also seeing the void? I figured it was behind her.

- "were welcome changes" - Huh? In what sense?

- "made up for it with her good suggestions" - Ergo, not useless. First thought needs qualification.

- "void seeds,” she told..." - same sentence.

(page 2)

- "rough compressed material" - more specific is more interesting.

- 'displacing' is not a compelling word. Surely it's more like ruining or invalidating or something. Also, boo: the standoff between R and N was tense, good conflict, waiting to burst into violence at any second, while they sparred verbally as a nice counterpoint. This new encounter better be better than that or I'll be disappointed.

- "setting off all the seeds at once" - repetitive of the same phrase a few lines before.

- "Careful planning scattered to the volcano’s pit by pure luck" - But no, the pure luck has realised the same thing that the careful planning was trying to achieve, by the sound of it. So the planning isn't really scattered at all.

- Can it be a rematch if the first match did not even start, really?

- "Another C came up behind" - Ooh, this is very Basil Exposition: random NPC comes up to explain the plot to the reader. The blocking of this scene is now rather comical. Someone comes up to one shoulder, someone comes up on the other side, another person comes up on the other side.

(page 3)

- "Everything can be proved by study" - I have not said it for a while, because I had not really had cause--because his part in the story is not large--but I just love O, O is A1, IMO. (Imagine that, grumpy old engineer identifies with grumpy old theorising, detailed obsessed character. Who'd have thunk it :lol:.)

(page 4)

- "hiding what was really inside" - This is certainly good tension. I am rapt. It could be at this level from closer to the start of this scene, getting us to this point sooner, or having greater tension as the background to the exchanges that precede this point. I was going to mention before, there were an awful lot of different voices speaking before.

- "Z?" - I don't remember who Z is, so this drops the tension for me.

- "It was good to face it" - Good is a word that does very little here, NED!

(page 5)

- The end of this section is rather weak. the creature being all blobby drops the tension, since it has not eyes that might glare, no claws that might rend, no mouth that might bite.

- "How had he not realized that many notes were missing" - This can be read two ways. I suggest removing the doubt by rephrasing.

- "with mental fingers" - bleh. Let me just pluck this apple that I can reach so easily because of how low it's hanging on this tree.

- "The contracting circle..." - Huh? What circle? Where did the circle start?

- "if I tried something like that" - missing word.

(page 6)

- "do great things" - Ooh, ooh - I've got another acronym, Low Hanging Fruit = LHF.

- "took in a deep breath" - This is the third such phrase in the space of the page: it's tiresome by this point.

- "but not from the arrogant K" - bit harsh for me. While that is true, it's also not quite that simple, I feel. S knows O better now, I wonder if he would make such a superficial assessment.

- "was getting suspicious" - a bit LHF, phrasing-wise.

(page 7)

- "They're either all at M A's..." - This is way too simplistic an analysis. (1) Surely there's no way they would be at R's apartment, unless E had been recused. In the space of only a day, when I don't think they had located the LC's base before S and I went off? Also, the statement is a self-fulfilling prophecy: either they're at A, or they're any other place that isn'y A. I know that's a bit harsh, but read in isolation, it does seem like a rather unproductive thing to say.

- "But no one was at the former Councilor's apartment either" - negative phrasing un-engaging. The first episode of the Death of 1,000 Cuts podcast featured the excellent advice, don't tell us what isn't the case. So like 'The former callers apartment was empty too.'

- "The LC? E?" - Well of course that's where they are! In the last chapter of a story, I want to see our hero(es) taking charge of the situation, showing the competence, showing where their arc has brought them, not still staggering around not doing what's going on. NED alert (Level 7!) 

- I'm speed reading now, I need to find the moment.

(page 8)

- "I'm just the surgeon" - No way does the surgeon leave his patient's side to go find someone. There must be other people who can do that? What if the Ef takes a sudden down turn? This is tantamount to the captain going with an away team: terrible command skills.

(page 10)

-  "the prophet" - Who's the prophet? I forget. Is that supposed to be WW?

- Okay, so, here we have people in a room talking and I'm fewer than 10 pages from the end of the book proper (excluding Epilog). What has become apparent over the last page or so, I believe, is: (a) the end of the world is not what's at stake in this book, because there is NO WAY you tie up the end of the world in 9 pages then we are not even in it; (b) there is no realistic of the threat of the LC (okay, N stabbed the Eff, but...) presenting a threat to the Assembly, based on how things are arranged at present. So, I don't know what the threat is anymore, I've lost sight of the stakes.

(page 11)

- "there are more important matters" - Which he's not going to tell us about even though we're less then the pages from the end of the book?

(page 12)

- The big orange slug-thing is hard to relate to, hard to feel any sense of wonder in the presence of. It's rather disappointing, like a slightly dodgy Doc Who villain.

- Arrrgghh: cliffhanger. Boo, hiss. S recognises the voice, but doesn't reveal. In this instance, I would suggest doing to Brandon. BS has talked more than once in the context of cliffhangers that he likes to make the reveal then cut away, leaving the reader to wonder over the potential consequences of the reveal. I think that could work really well in this situation, especially since the reader is not getting the stakes that they thought they were: i.e. then end of the world.

- "stepped through the portal after the LC" - no need for the comma there, IMO.

(page 13)

- I had forgotten about the 5 asses. WRS, sure, but you might play up even more before we cut away from E in her last scene what a huge potential threat they are/will be to her friends.

- I like the whispered warning.

- "The LC huddled together, but they didn’t have their manacles and collars now" - Why is there a 'but' here? The first part of the sentence is not in opposition to the second part, they are complementary.

(page 14)

- "There was too much going on" - I'm inclined to agree. There's an awful lot of cutting around, and as I noted above, no clear indication of what the threat is, or what the stakes are.

- "she could have told them it was riddled with flaws" - Aye, you see I think you're falling into dumb villain syndrome here (DVS, yay!). The LC are made to look really stupid in this section. There's no way they are they naive, or they would not have got as far as they have, ergo, this sudden weakness . indecisiveness, etc. is not convincing.

(page 15)

- "concentration of power" - this is an awkward phrase before it gets repeated three times in quick succession.

- When did R discover P was an Ar? I don't remember that. Was it not discovered by S and the knowledge brought back by him? When did the others get it?

- "For an extinct species" - Lol, but then 'species' is repeated in quick succession referencing another group.

- "fin on its back waggling back and forth"

- "A voice cut through the separate conversations in the room" - No, I don't buy this. A completely unknown race of creature is present among them and no one is paying attention to what it's saying? Not  plausible, IMO.

(page 16)

- There can be peace but still conflict (of sorts). These are not mutually exclusive.

- "S clutching his head, E and I gathered around him" - <sigh>, S takes a massive backward step again.

(page 17)

- Why would the LC know ay more than anyone else? Doesn't seem very astute from R. More than this, so close the ending of the book, this seems like the start of another mystery, the beginning of another puzzle that will not be answered here.

- "with whom" - This doesn't sound like Re's internal voice.

- "They’d spoken of access to great power in their prophesy" - this sounds like the power is literally in the prophecy. 'They'd spoken in their prophecy of access to great power.'

- "listening to the Symphony paint the energy" - mixed metaphor, methinks.

- Re has got all the agency in this situation. Everyone else is just standing around, and we're cutting away from him for the last page of the book. There is no conceivable chance this can end in a satisfying way, just none. Things aren't coming together her, it feels like they are flying apart as more and more new questions arise and no existing promises or questions are kept or answered.

- "he felt his body shutting down" - the actual death of (Sam's) agency.

- "A discordant jangle" - There's good potential for this scene to be really tense if it was clear what S was able to hear and what the others can or cannot, but it's not clear to me at all at this point. I'm still very concerned at this point about not being satisfied by the ending.

(page 19)

- The El are not working for me. They've got no personality. I'm put in mind of Daleks when they come through and make their announcement. It's really quite corny, if I'm honest. These are the big bad? I want badder; I want personality. The sharing of the peace has potential, but it's a wee bit 'You will be assimilated.'

- I'm not going to talk about the ending until I've read the epilogue.

- "and none of us thought to question that, even K" - I know it's G and dialogue has license in terms of grammar and diction, but this is the end of the book and it needs to flow and punch hard, with clarity.

- "better to see your own tail" - this is a great idea, but I'm not sure the logic scans. I tried to think of what was up with it and my approach to that was to consider how it might be clearer. I thought of 'The way to see your tail is to look over your shoulder' or 'You only see your tail by looking over your shoulder.' I dunno.

- "m of the Houses of G and P" - it's not one house.

- "clenched a hand and banged in on his thigh" - It's not going to make a bang on his thigh. It would bang on a table, maybe, although I would say thump was better. He would slap his thigh, and it would make a slappy sound.

- "Why had he assumed" - he's better than this, we've seen this in other stories. I think this needs a review in the edit to show his uncertainty, but it's like the only option they've go. It's more tense if he's unsure, less confident, but nonetheless determined. There's even scope for conflict among the members of the Society, although I appreciate that will add to M's word count.

(page 20)

- "conclusively say this was a different universe" - What is 'this' referring to? Unclear.

- "One piece of good news" - That's pretty lazy logic too, not worthy of M.

(page 21)

- I don't think 'of Book 2' is appropriate. It's just 'End' surely?

OVERALL 

1 - Bottom line: I'm not satisfied by the ending. The epilogue is okay, can be punched up, but it's still a weighty concept, the death of a universe.

2 - In S's POV, there is still a creature attacking the attendant people. There is an immediate threat unresolved and the book is over. What do I do now? Am I satisfied? Or could be dead, Ri could be dead, or Re. S, E and I are in full flight. How can I be satisfied with that?

3 - What is the status of the end of the world? The D is still approaching, presumably? How far away is it? What are all the Ar assassins doing at this point? The LC? We're right in the middle of this story, and in the middle of a fight.

I'm going to process this some more and might comment further.

<R>

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Thanks @Robinski!

18 hours ago, Robinski said:

I shall use the abbreviation NED (=Not Enough Drama)

I think this pretty much needs to be stamped all over my first drafts...

18 hours ago, Robinski said:

but I just love O

Lol...That's why he's in so many books!

18 hours ago, Robinski said:

I want to see our hero(es) taking charge of the situation, showing the competence, showing where their arc has brought them

Yep. I think I completely missed this on the second half of the book. Hopefully I can correct that this edit.

18 hours ago, Robinski said:

S recognises the voice, but doesn't reveal. In this instance,

This is a fault of my setup. You're supposed to know what the voice is but I didn't set it up enough.

19 hours ago, Robinski said:

the actual death of (S's) agency.

Lol. I'm working through the audiobook now, which is really helping me see how S developed in that one and shows how much I regressed him in this one! I'm going to go back and give him a lot more agency...

19 hours ago, Robinski said:

These are the big bad? I want badder; I want personality. The sharing of the peace has potential, but it's a wee bit 'You will be assimilated.'

Fair point. I'll ponder.

19 hours ago, Robinski said:

1 - Bottom line: I'm not satisfied by the ending. The epilogue is okay, can be punched up, but it's still a weighty concept, the death of a universe.

Glad this is still hitting, at least, but I'll punch it up.

19 hours ago, Robinski said:

2 - In S's POV, there is still a creature attacking the attendant people. There is an immediate threat unresolved and the book is over. What do I do now? Am I satisfied? Or could be dead, Ri could be dead, or Re. S, E and I are in full flight. How can I be satisfied with that?

Yep. S. needs more agency. Will correct.

19 hours ago, Robinski said:

3 - What is the status of the end of the world? The D is still approaching, presumably? How far away is it? What are all the Ar assassins doing at this point? The LC? We're right in the middle of this story, and in the middle of a fight.

This one I may keep at least mostly similar. I'm intending book 2 and 3 to come out very close together, so I don't see ending with things still in motion as a huge problem.

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8 hours ago, Mandamon said:

I'm going to go back and give him a lot more agency...

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8 hours ago, Mandamon said:

This one I may keep at least mostly similar. I'm intending book 2 and 3 to come out very close together, so I don't see ending with things still in motion as a huge problem.

Interesting. I'm trying now to think of examples of this being done in written form (as opposed to TV, where it happens all the time, obvs).

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3 minutes ago, Robinski said:
8 hours ago, Mandamon said:

This one I may keep at least mostly similar. I'm intending book 2 and 3 to come out very close together, so I don't see ending with things still in motion as a huge problem.

Interesting. I'm trying now to think of examples of this being done in written form (as opposed to TV, where it happens all the time, obvs).

It's popular as a selling technique in a lot of indie markets, so I'm trying it out with this one. My plan is to release book 2 and 3 together, give a little space, then release 4 and 5. I plan for there to be more of a complete arc after book 3. We'll see how it works...

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Posted (edited)

15 minutes ago, Mandamon said:

then release 4 and 5

:blink: 

You'd better get your skates on!!

Edited by Robinski
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52 minutes ago, Robinski said:

I'm trying now to think of examples of this being done in written form

Off the top of my head, there was the dual release of Red Threads of Fortune and Black Tides of Heaven by JY Yang relatively recently.  I could probably dig up a bunch of "within 9 to 14 months" sequel releases, which is a relatively tight turnaround, but I don't know if that's quite what you're meaning. 

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57 minutes ago, industrialistDragon said:

Off the top of my head, there was the dual release of Red Threads of Fortune and Black Tides of Heaven by JY Yang relatively recently.  I could probably dig up a bunch of "within 9 to 14 months" sequel releases, which is a relatively tight turnaround, but I don't know if that's quite what you're meaning. 

Yep, there's a lot of them, especially with the indie authors I follow. I'm planning to release book 3 maybe a couple months after 2, which of course means I need to finish both of them up first!

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