Magic System!

[+Invocation]

So I've been developing a magic system and a new world and I need some input on what y'all think about it. Here's the details:

Spoiler

People are tested at a young age for the ability to Ascend (placeholder term until I get something better). Ascension is a process of making yourself more in-tune with the magic/technology hybrid by making yourself a hybrid. The Zesten are the highest ranking of the ones able to do this, and they are revered as gods, able to summon storms, cause earthquakes, firestorms, anything they want and have the power for.

The powers:
There are several categories of the powers Zesten can access, and no two Zesten are precisely the same unless they work towards it.
The Elemental Abilities: Storm, Air, Fire, Earth, and Water (storm is hard to access and control unless you’re really strong, as it incorporates some of all of the others)
The Physical Abilities: Strength, Speed, Memory, Speech, and Thought (strength is also hard to control)
Full arm replacements can have two, half arms can have one, legs can have one because replacing your upper legs goes badly most of the time.

Process of gaining adaptations:
1. Spend time focusing, meditating even, on whether you think you can handle an(other)
adaptation and what that should be
2. Build the clockwork limb by hand for however long you take, being certain to leave room for the
gems of the actual adaptation to nestle
3. Go into the caves beneath the Zesten enclave in search of power to bond to the limb
4. Find it or die
5. If you die, end of story, you’re dead, left haunting the caverns for the rest of eternity.
6. If you find it, you extend the clockwork towards the node of the power and wait for it to settle in
and form the appropriate gem
7. Bond the clockwork to your limb in the very painful process. Hope you’re strong enough to
remain conscious or you could botch the process. That’s never good.

8. Make your way out of the caves
9. If you make it to this step, good job! You have earned the adaptation and a feast will be held in
your honor back at the Enclave.

So, thoughts? Suggestions? @Pagliacci I know you like this stuff.

[Pagliacci]

1 hour ago, Invocation said:

So, thoughts? Suggestions? @Pagliacci I know you like this stuff.

 

You've got the groundwork for an interesting worldbuilding element here. From what I've read I'm assuming anyone has the potential to harness this magic, so one's class and influence is probably determined by one's aptitude, no doubt the upper classes would hoard most knowledge and understanding. It'd be fascinating to explore how control over natural forces could be implemented in a nation's development (control of weather, temperature, etc) and in warfare (earthquakes, bush fires, absence of/excessive rains).

The technological aspect is interesting as well.

1 hour ago, Invocation said:

Build the clockwork limb by hand for however long you take

Would there not be an entire industry of artisans that could sell their services to craft such designs? Watchmakers?

On the whole this magic reminds me a lot of Allomancy, particularly in how it fits into the worldbuilding. The main differences (to me) being anyone has the potential to harness this magic (however without the knowledge exclusive to the elite this would be difficult) and that these powers are potentially much more devastating/influential on a continental scale.

 

Does this magic have any thematic relevance/importance in this story of yours?

 

Hope this helps!

 

[Ixthos]

@Invocation Interesting ideas :-) A few quick questions

 

Does having the limb give the abilities to the whole body, so replacing an arm could give Memory, while the arm functions as a normal limb? And if the limb is destroyed, does the ability remain

Do the limbs function at the same level as a normal limb, and can they feel touch and pressure and temperature?

How does the Elemental abilities tie to what the limb can do?

Is it a combination of an Elemental ability with a Physical one, or is it that one can have an Elemental ability and/or a Physical one, but they don't "combine", so if you replace a full arm you don't have "Storm strength" but rather "Storm" and "strength" as an example?

Could you replace all your limbs and gain more abilities?

Does anyone who dies there - even if they didn't go to try to bind a limb - become a ghost?

 

Sounds like an interesting system :-) 

[Quantus]

I really like it!  The physicality of having to craft the clockwork limb as the physical focus is really intriguing, and visually all kinds of steampunky fun.

In addition to @Ixthos's, I have questions:

• Is the replacement body-part functionally critical, in that design and materials make a significant difference? Or is it more about the element of Sacrifice (where theoretically a peasant could work something up with lesser materials and/or craftmanship that would still work?
• Does the magic support the amputation before Ascension (ala Hemalurgy), or is it going to require a medical professional to help the person survive the removal and replacement of the arm, eye, etc?
• Are the Rankings about power and/or skill with a single chosen specialty, or about the mastery of multiple? Or both? Is there an upper limit to how many can be possessed at once?
• Is there any body part that is entirely off-limits, either functionally or just social taboo (heart, brain, etc)? As in, is it possible that there any Zesten that are 100% replaced Argo's?
• Who does the testing, is it fair, and can anyone access the Caves if they are willing to take the risk?

[+Invocation]

7 hours ago, Pagliacci said:

Would there not be an entire industry of artisans that could sell their services to craft such designs? Watchmakers?

It doesn't work if someone else makes it. You have to be intrinsically familiar with the workings of it, having shaped it by your own hands, for the merger to work.

7 hours ago, Pagliacci said:

and that these powers are potentially much more devastating/influential on a continental scale.

They have a tendency to be pretty destructive when someone that's strong enough gets ahold of them, yes, particularly Storm.

7 hours ago, Pagliacci said:

Does this magic have any thematic relevance/importance in this story of yours?

Yes, it does. The world itself is a cyclical world, where major events ripple through time, and most of those relate to the powers going haywire or a threat to those wielding the powers (kind of deservedly, they're not exactly...good people most of the time.

49 minutes ago, Ixthos said:

Does having the limb give the abilities to the whole body, so replacing an arm could give Memory, while the arm functions as a normal limb? And if the limb is destroyed, does the ability remain

If the limb bonds correctly, it distributes the power, yes. If the limb is completely destroyed, you lose the powers because you lose the link to the power and the channeling device to it as well. If you can rescue the gems, you can potentially build another one and attempt to reinsert the gems, but that doesn't always work. If the limb is just damaged, but the gems are intact, you can repair it and it'll work just fine.

51 minutes ago, Ixthos said:

Do the limbs function at the same level as a normal limb, and can they feel touch and pressure and temperature?

They do function pretty much exactly like a normal limb, albeit one that can transmit powers, including pressure and stuff. Picture the Pacific Rim mind-drift thing. It's pretty much that.

53 minutes ago, Ixthos said:

How does the Elemental abilities tie to what the limb can do?

It's one of the powers granted from the source of power, which is really just a massive concentration of natural energy that people have figured out how to communicate somewhat with, and it's distributing powers in an attempt to protect itself, with the Elemental abilities supposed to be used to protect the nature it sources from.

54 minutes ago, Ixthos said:

Is it a combination of an Elemental ability with a Physical one, or is it that one can have an Elemental ability and/or a Physical one, but they don't "combine", so if you replace a full arm you don't have "Storm strength" but rather "Storm" and "strength" as an example?

They are separate, though if you have Strength, it will have a slight boost on your power using Elemental abilities. I've been typing it as storm/strength, for example. 

56 minutes ago, Ixthos said:

Could you replace all your limbs and gain more abilities?

They do that (kind of). There are leg enhancements, though they can only replace the bottom of the leg because it gets hectic trying to replace the whole leg. If you're talking about replace individual fingers for usage with channeling a power, that doesn't work. Too much power, not enough space to channel it, plus the gem doesn't fit. The clockwork smaller than an entire limb has a tendency to explode like an egg in the microwave.

58 minutes ago, Ixthos said:

Does anyone who dies there - even if they didn't go to try to bind a limb - become a ghost?

Some people do, some people don't. Most just get reincarnated as various trees and wildlife. Ghost is a little bit of a misnomer, though, it's more like they become nature spirits, except those who die in the process of bonding, who become more like poltergeists, messing with future challengers.

1 hour ago, Quantus said:

visually all kinds of steampunky fun.

That's why it's there. I love steampunk aesthetics.

1 hour ago, Quantus said:

• Is the replacement body-part functionally critical, in that design and materials make a significant difference? Or is it more about the element of Sacrifice (where theoretically a peasant could work something up with lesser materials and/or craftmanship that would still work?

Materials don't matter. It's the spirit of the thing, the time you put in, and the sacrifice that matter more than craftmanship.

1 hour ago, Quantus said:

• Does the magic support the amputation before Ascension (ala Hemalurgy), or is it going to require a medical professional to help the person survive the removal and replacement of the arm, eye, etc?

You don't actually really amputate the limb beforehand. It's more like the clockwork merges with your limb. Still very painful, though.

1 hour ago, Quantus said:

• Are the Rankings about power and/or skill with a single chosen specialty, or about the mastery of multiple? Or both? Is there an upper limit to how many can be possessed at once?

There are two forms of ranking: one for power and one for skill. Power is set upon testing, because that's how they know how hard they can push you to train, and you really can't (with a couple rare exceptions) get around that. Skill is a versatile ranking that depends on your skill with whatever adaptations you have, all of them together and individually.

The endcap for how many powers you can have is how many limbs you can replace. Your arms can have two each and your legs can have one, and replace more than that is an issue and is nearly unsurvivable. Some people stop at one arm, some people stop at two arms, some people don't even do their arms and go straight to legs. It's up to the user. Full hardcap is 6 powers.

1 hour ago, Quantus said:

• Is there any body part that is entirely off-limits, either functionally or just social taboo (heart, brain, etc)? As in, is it possible that there any Zesten that are 100% replaced Argo's?

You can't 100% transform because it doesn't work. Delicate and vital tissues (brain, heart, lungs) don't allow you to survive the merging process for them, which is why you're limited to the arms and legs.

1 hour ago, Quantus said:

• Who does the testing, is it fair, and can anyone access the Caves if they are willing to take the risk?

The testing is fair and impartial. It's more or less just a scan of each person to see if they've got enough raw natural connection to undergo the process and have a good chance of surviving. 

Theoretically, anyone can access the caves, but they don't. There's a major taboo around it, plus the fact that the caves change, guiding the worthy and confusing the unworthy, lead to major issues for someone sneaking in.

[Quantus]

@Invocation I like it!  That all makes a lot of sense.  How would you feel about adding Eyes to the list of possible (if perhaps difficult) prosthetic, maybe allowing for Senses to be one of the Physical Enhancements?  It's not as critical in functional terms as most major organs.  You could even go really crazy and allow clockwork Ears or a Tycho Brahe Nose attachment, but the Steampunk glowing crystal Eye in particular is really cool image. 

[Chinkoln]

I think that what has been put down is great. Here is a theory about magic systems. Imagine an Elantrian goes to Scadrial. If he/she also happens to be an allomancer then when they snap then will automatically have the instinct to use that power. All powers come from the shards, which come from Adonalsium. I think this theory would work for any system.

[+Invocation]

3 hours ago, Quantus said:

How would you feel about adding Eyes to the list of possible (if perhaps difficult) prosthetic, maybe allowing for Senses to be one of the Physical Enhancements?

The eyes aren't a connection point, so there'd be no way to bond them anyway. You'd just be sticking a metal ball in your eye without bonding it to let you see. Worth noting, though, is that the eyes can glow when you use the powers, if you choose to let them (most users do, because it looks cool and intimidating).

[Quantus]

1 minute ago, Invocation said:

The eyes aren't a connection point, so there'd be no way to bond them anyway. You'd just be sticking a metal ball in your eye without bonding it to let you see. Worth noting, though, is that the eyes can glow when you use the powers, if you choose to let them (most users do, because it looks cool and intimidating).

Fair enough, your call.  I just liked the image of a glowing gem-eye Mad Eye Moody equivalent.  

[+Invocation]

2 minutes ago, Quantus said:

Fair enough, your call.  I just liked the image of a glowing gem-eye Mad Eye Moody equivalent.  

Trust me, I tried to get it to work, but I could never justify it.