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The North Sea


Archer

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Klasten practiced a focusing technique he'd learned from his mentor. He breathed deeply, teeth barred in pain, and concentrated on what he could do. Stop the wind from smashing int his face? Nope. He ignored that. Make the pain stop? No. It too was ignored then. Prevent the coin from breaking his back? Maybe. He tried to straighten his spine, lifting his legs against the force of gravity. It didn't help much, but it gave him something to do. 

He closed his eyes and counted the seconds until the terrifying ride stopped. Exactly seventy-eight later, the sensation of being dragged stopped, and he tumbled onto something hard. I used to like flying. Also, I need immediate medical attention, he thought loudly, hoping someone nearby was telepathic. 

********
"Now look what you've done. How's he going to interact with anyone if he's mute?"

I'm working on it.

"You do realize what all this fourth wall breaking is going to do to him, right?"

Yeah. Like I said, I'm working on it. 

"Should've stuck with a Feruchemist."

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Koran cocked his head at Nogard, rubbing his horns with both hands, a nervous gesture common to his people. "We don't have any cities on this planet. We just brought animals and stuff here with us. Though I could ask Zehr to bring you to Valnore, my planet." 

********

You realize that any human from a cosmere planet would probably explode if they went to Valnore, right?

"Yeah, but the look on their faces would be worth it."

Maybe you can break canon for once and ignore the godlings' tectonic and hormonal disruptions. 

"I guess I could... but... why should I?"

Just quit it. Investiture and godling-influences aren't quite base opposites.

"Okay, fine."

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Rick waited, his snakes was whispered to him of what things happen here, on the other side of the world. And he wanted to meet the mysterious benefactor that saved him from the wrath of the cosmic being. 

~~~~

The being stood on the cliff, above the spirit barrier. They could see one of their Beloved Ones waiting below. They smiled, it was almost time to meet him. 

~~~~

In the mime headquarters.

Mimes ran about, waving their hands. There was nothing they could do to stop the beings from breaking through the Wall. 

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Enter: Elite Mime Task Force

They unsheathed their blades. Black face paint instead of white, they were color inverted mimes. And they had honorblades. They Flew towards Rick, holding blades out. They stopped, the lead one opened his mouth, then- started miming. Duel me! he said, miming it.

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Nogard looked at Koran in surprise. "Are you not native to this island?"

@AxeliustheGrizzled

---Far Away---

I felt the others break the fourth wall and winced. Had nobody else thought of bribing the mimes to create a controlled hole?

I inspected the Thread for a moment and frowned. What in the world...

I lifted my voice and called out

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Seriously, guys, who are you talking to?

I turned my head back to the world I had just stepped into. Flames filled the ground for as far as I could see. I frowned. This would never do.

I waved my hand, freezing them like the flames in the Ascension room. I stepped forward onto the glossy black ground and nodded. Perfect.

Now, to get down to business.

I waved my hand again and created a dais with a throne. I walked up the steps and sat in it. Now, I was ready.

I started to wave my hand again, but stopped. Didn't want to overuse it, after all. I clapped instead.

A bright light flashed and a figure appeared. He looked around in confusion. Then he saw me. His eyes widened, and he fell to his knees, opening his mouth to speak.

I silenced him with a gesture. "Yes, Rekaerb. It is me. Xinoehp512 himself."

Edited by xinoehp512
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The cosmic being, or the Benefactor, as he called himself, was ready. He stepped through, into his chosen realm. The he snapped his fingers, summoning Rick.

~~~ 

Rick prepared to stab the first mime in the gut, but was suddenly transported away, to stand in front of a strange man. This man, or being, as no man could glow with so much power, was very odd looking. He wore a crisp white shirt, tie, and vest, but with a silver sash and baggy pants that were tucked into shiny black boots. He wore a top hat, and a very odd coat: It had the cut of a fitted trench coat, but appeared to be made from a wizard's robe, with long sleves, and silver trim. The coat was covered with patches from various groups. The being held a scepter with a glowing golden sphere held in a dragon's claw on top. 

Rick fell to his knees, muttering that he was not worthy. The being shook his head.

"Get up idiot, we have much to discuss"

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I looked at my creation with the eye of a creator. I wasn't entirely certain what that was, but it seemed to have an effect on Rekaerb.

I waved towards him. "Stand up. We have a lot to talk about."

He scrambled to his feet. "Master-"

I cut him off, again. "Yes, I know. Now, to business." I rose from my chair, mentally commanding it to sink back into the floor. I stepped down from the dais and waved towards Rekaerb. "Walk with me."

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Koran nodded at Nogard. “I, and all others on this island, are native to the planet Valnore. We simply rent this island.”

Andy whistled to the tune of ‘Eye of the Tiger’ by Survivor. She realized she was breaking the fourth wall and switched to ‘Kiss’ by Prince without missing a beat. 

Suddenly, a figure in torn-up baggy jeans and a Calvin and Hobbes shirt appeared about five feet above the whale in the sky. He fell onto his knees, wincing as they were doubtless scratched up, then spun around and came to his feet smoothly, pulling the collar of his shirt and straightening his shoulders self-consciously. He then slowly strode towards the group of people at the other end of the whale. The Winged saw him and immediately fell onto their knees in awestruck disbelief, while Andy waved her hand at him and began to sing the first two lines of ‘Bohemian Rhapsody.’

“Is this the real life? / Is this just fantasy?” 

“Caught in a landslide / No escape from reality,” Axel answered.

Edited by AxeliustheGrizzled
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Nogard raised his eyebrows. "Rented from whom?" @AxeliustheGrizzled

---Far away---

I started walking away, Rekaerb following. "Where are we, anyway?" he asked.

I slowed to let him catch up. "We are in the Realm of Dreams. It's inside the Ring of Death, the band of deadly and difficult zones that surround the mountain where I, along with others like me reside." I resumed my original speed. "That way," I said, gesturing to the right, 'or, well, what would be that way if we were outside, is a flat plain where it's so dry even the air turns to powder and falls on the ground." I smiled a little, remembering something. "The ground's covered with it, and it makes it impossible to gain traction of any kind against the ground. You can't even walk, let alone run." I turned and pointed the other way. "That way is a nearly impossible maze. Not only is it three dimensional, with ladders and staircases, but everything moves. You could wander around in there for a thousand years and not even get close to finding a way out. Of course," I continued, "you wouldn't last a thousand years. The monsters would get you long before that."

 Rekaerb started to ask a question, then stopped, looking at me for confirmation. I waved at him to continue.

"What's so difficult about this place?" he asked. "It doesn't seem very dangerous in here."

I smiled maliciously. "That's because you're with me. If a normal person wandered in here unaided, they would basically wander into one of their dreams. Little to no logic, and literally anything that they can imagine. Death and injuries aren't real, but," I shot a look at Rekaerb, "pain is. And what you get is tied to your emotions. Die, and you're almost guaranteed to get stuck a nightmare. It's a downward spiral after that."

Rekaerb shuddered. I didn't blame him.

"But you won't have to do any of that," I assured him. "Your tasks lie elsewhere. First," I said, handing him a card, "send a clone to this alley."

He looked at the card and nodded. "Done".

I smiled.

Edited by xinoehp512
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"We rented it from the Landlord," Koran said. "I think he owns this half of the planet, so he demands a lot of money for even one island. The tourist revenue is just enough, though we're going back to Valnore soon, so this tour is free. Just be glad you don't have to come to our planet; the hormonal anomalies usually drive outsiders insane within hours." 

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A man sat at his desk, reading. What he was reading intrigued him. It seemed the other Sharders had decided to inject themselves into the story. What had started out as a simple cruise and exploration of an island, had turned into a complete and utter fracturing of the fourth wall. It made him wish he had made the decision to join in on the fun earlier, and created a character when this thread was starting, so he could hop in as well. Well, no time like the present. What's stopping me anyway? I don't need a character here to be able to interact with the world myself do I? Maybe Fae won't get accepted into the Spacefaring group, and she can join me here later. As the man began to ponder this, the rift in the fourth wall grew stronger, as it seemed to be ripping away at the walls of his own apartment. 

Suddenly the patio door shattered, and the contents of the apartment began flying out into the void. My magic cards! Why did I leave my backpack on the kitchen table again? Why couldn't I just put them away for once. Hearing the meowing of cats, the man stood up and ran to the hall, scooping them up, and putting them in the bedroom. That should keep them safe. At least long enough for this damage to be repaired. Although I don't think maintenance will be able to handle a job like this, especially right before Thanksgiving. Deciding he wanted to look the part, the man went and changed into his Renaissance Festival outfit, and grabbing his sword, went to the edge of the rift. I doubt this will help much, but hopefully all that time spent LARPing will prove useful. Not waiting any longer, the man jumped off the edge, into the swirling abyss.

***************

After what seemed like an eternity of falling forever into darkness, the man opened his eyes, and discover he was in fact still falling. Below him he saw a bountiful island, full of unknown dangers. Well, they can't be too unknown, seeing as I'll be the one writing them. How's that going to work anyway? Now that I'm here, who is typing this out for the others to read? Who knows. The quickly approaching ground reminded his that he was, in fact, still falling, still. Spotting a nice looking hill from which he could survey the area, he simply wrote himself there, and there he was. He looked out at his surroundings. Hm, that tree is a little too tall for me to see over, let's fix that. As the tree suddenly lost about 20 feet in height, the man was more easily able to observe what lay beyond it. In the direction he looked was the beach where most of the characters were currently gathered, and turning, he saw the Mountain of the Gods. I thought I would have landed closer, though maybe the break in the barrier between reality and fantasy has grown bigger? Unsure of where he should go, the man sat down, and rested a moment. Inter-reality travelling was not easy, and he had already had a long day at work, so a moments rest was welcome.

Suddenly a group of mimes popped up, looking furious. "Come on guys! I literally just sat down. Couldn't you have shown up 3 sentences ago?" hearing this seemed to send a wave of agony through the group. With a sigh the man stood to his feet, and drew his sword. He counted the number of mimes, though maybe he missed one? The stripes made it hard to tell where one ended and another began. Alright, I've faced worse odds. Let's do this. Taking a defensive pose that any real swordsman would scoff at, the man stepped forward, ready to face the wrath of the Guardians of the Fourth Wall. "Come on you storming mimes, I don't have all day." Deciding to save himself the effort of writing it all down, the man defeated all but the last mime, who seemed to be their champion. Standing face to face, they locked swords in a match of strength, the man's height and weight giving him an advantage. Suddenly the mime stepped back, and taking advantage of his opponent's momentary instability, the mime swung his sword straight at the man's head, cracking him right in the skull. "Ha! Headshots are against the rules! Only torso and limb shots count!" the man said, as the sword bounced harmlessly off his head, without leaving a mark. Stepping forward, he tapped the mime in the chest, and proclaimed "Dead. Thanks for the challenge, I haven't fought solo against a group this size in, years probably. Now which way don't you want me to go? Cause that's probably the place I'm needed the most right now." Looking dejected, the mime pointed inland, as he and the rest of his group picked up their stuff and teleported back to Mime HQ.

Straightening his trench coat, and adjusting his bandoleer, the man began walking. It would of course be much easier to appear there, but half the fun was in the journey. At least that was what he had been told.

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All of a sudden, Andy spotted another Winged flying towards the skywhale. He landed and carefully set down his ward, Dusk, then folded his wings behind his back. "How in Rieshi's name did you manage to get wings?" Andy demanded of Wereci, her princessly nature undoubtedly coming out. Wereci somehow managed to do that to her. 

Wereci shook his head like a wet dog would, spraying what looked like fresh blood all over the back of the whale, though his hair remained a light blond, without noticeable stains. Oddly, his curly hair wasn't in a tail, instead standing up on his head and making him look even taller than he already was. "Easkalish is revived in this version of the non-canon plot, Tez," he calmly explained, then tapped the twin hilts peeking out from both of his shoulders with his wings. Dusk opened his mouth quickly, but didn't speak before Andy. 

"What's up with the swords?" she asked. Dusk put his head in his hands in despair while Wereci grinned a savage, lupine grin. 

"They're my shoulderblades, thank you." Wereci did a back-handspring in satisfaction, hurling himself off the whale. Andy took a half-step forward in shock as Dusk rolled his eyes in annoyance. 

"Does he do that often?" Andy asked of Dusk, panicked. Was Wereci going to fall in the water? Winged weren't nearly as good at swimming as they were at flying, so what would happen to Wereci if he landed in the water?

"That pun? Yes, incessantly. He came up with it when he was thirteen and never stopped saying it. Even the first time, it only slightly funny. He has to have said it at least a thousand times at this point. That kid..." Dusk's utter nonchalance put Andy off.

"No, I mean the constant putting himself in danger, idiot," Andy snapped sharply. 

Dusk broke into riotous laughter instantly and Andy got the feeling she'd said something really stupid. Dusk stopped himself with some effort, then said, "He's Wereci, lass, he does nothing else. You saw the blood he sprayed all over the whale?" Andy nodded. "He got that in his hair by slaying thirteen Zosan soldiers. In one go. He's unnatural, but I'm glad he's on my side." 

Dusk was not there a second later. Andy spun and followed with her eyes the winged form of Wereci towing Dusk up into the sky, powerful shoulder muscles bringing both of them higher and higher. Andy thought she heard Wereci shout, "I'm on my own side, queen!" 

Then Dusk was falling. Dropping like a stone; the comparison came to Andy in a half-second. Wereci folded his wings and dove after Dusk, managing to catch the older soldier seconds before he would have hit the water. A grotesque image came to Andy's brain, that of how her mother had described a suicide off of a bridge. Entrails splattered about, crushed, blood everywhere, the corpse barely recognizable. 

Wereci began rising again, winging higher and higher. He stopped at one point, drifting on an updraft. Andy thought she saw him and Dusk kissing, and turned away in disgust. "It's not natural," she muttered, then rose her voice to a shout that Dusk and Wereci wouldn't be able to hear. "You're ten years older than Wereci, Dusk! Shame on you!" Another fact bothered her more, however. Dusk had somehow managed to win over the taciturn Wereci despite the fact that Andy was trained in many seduction tactics and had tried all of them on Wereci. Apparently, the Tesan simply wasn't as easy as all the nobles in Arashea had been. Something else will work, Andy thought, perhaps a touch desperately. A quote from her mother came to her instantly. Every man has his trigger. Your father's was kindness.

Her father. He'd remained a wild card with her mother many years after his death, though Andy had been seven when he'd died. She didn't remember her mother ever crying for him; Mya said that that kind of coping only ended badly, though neither of the sisters had the will to confront their mother about it. 

A moment later, Wereci landed back on the skywhale, bare feet thumping as he jogged for a moment to slow his momentum. He dropped Dusk carefully, and Dusk stood up, brushing off the sleeves of his coat, which was actually Wereci's coat as evidenced by that fact that it was way too big for Dusk, with a rare truly happy smile on his face as he watched Wereci continue jogging to the end of the whale and jump off, soon visible again as he flew high above the whale. Andy thought she heard Dusk say, "That's pure disaster on wings, that is." 

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Sorry if I've offended anyone's Catholicism. 

“Say, Dusk, why is he in love you?” Andy asked the tall soldier.

Dusk’s expression was of surprise. “He isn’t in love with me. That’s ridiculous.”

”But why were you kissing, then?”

”We weren’t. He was just carrying me. Though, from this angle, it might looked like that.” Dusk shaded his eyes and looked up at the sky, then back at Andy with an amused spark in his eyes. “You have a suspicious mind, sister.”

“That’s a distinct possibility,” Andy said, sure that her face was growing progressively redder. 

Edited by AxeliustheGrizzled
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Do you have anything planned for the Landlord character, Axelius?

Rekaerb stood dumbfounded. What in the world...

Suddenly, he noticed that the doorway hadn't closed entirely. He walked over and looked through.

Beyond the doorway was a circular room with black walls. Red stylized flames lined the sides of the chamber, and far below- or so it appeared- flames raged. In the middle was a raised platform.

Rekaerb took a hesitant step through the doorway. Without warning, it snapped shut behind him. He jumped. Casting his eyes around the room, he realized that there were no doors or windows. He shivered, even though the room was quite warm.

Uncertain of what to do, he wandered over to the center platform and climbed up on it. He stood on it, waiting.

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The Landlord picked at his teeth with a, you got it, toothpick. He leaned back in his fine mahogany chair, a butler at his side asking, “Do you require more pizza, sire?” 

“No, Frank, thank you,” the Landlord said, “and please do not call me ‘sire.’” Frank nodded, his finely-oiled mustache quivering, perhaps with displeasure or confusion. Usually, men as rich as the Landlord ignored their servants. The Landlord himself had once done the same, but in his old age he’d come to realize that those men who served him were to be treated as well as they treated him. It was only fair, and anyway, he needed someone to take over his job when he died, since he had never had any children. His wife had only given birth to three children, all of them girls, and stillborn. Frank was a good, honest man, a potential heir, thought the Landlord would have to train him in he was to truly have the necessary skills. 

There are too many options, the Landlord thought. The cook is a fine man. He would be a good Landlord. Another in the line that we have sustained for many millennia. Landlords had unnaturally long lives, the Landlord himself was one hundred forty-three. One hundred fifty was the average, so the Landlord was prepared to die. He’d lived plenty long.

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On 21.11.2018 at 11:38 PM, Karnatheon said:

 I doubt this will help much, but hopefully all that time spent LARPing will prove useful.

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Another LARPer :lol: That's great!!!

Since she felt like Riathor wouldn't answer in a while, Damaya turned around and asked Mari to follow Araha.  Catching up with her she smiled at her friend.
"What is going on here?"
@Badadah

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