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So over in the You Know You're a Sanderfan When... thread, there was a pretty hilarious digression of Cosmere Hogwarts. I decided to make a full topic about it (mostly because I missed out on most of the original and wanted to contribute without derailing that thread any more :P ) So here goes...

You see, the real problem when the cosmere invaded Hogwarts was that the Seekers all joined the Quidditch teams and replaced the snitches with Southern Scadrial Allomantic flying machines that they could keep track of with their Allomancy. But then the Lurchers kept on Pulling the snitches away from them, and the Coinshots would try to send them back to the Seekers. The Seers burned atium so knew what everyone was going to do and dominated. Thugs would grab people off of their broomsticks and throw them around. The final straw, however, was when the the double gold Twinborns would go crazy, harm themselves, then heal. Eventually, it was all stopped. No Allomancers were allowed to play Quidditch ever again.

That was when the Feruchemists decided to get in on the action.

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So over in the You Know You're a Sanderfan When... thread, there was a pretty hilarious digression of Cosmere Hogwarts. I decided to make a full topic about it (mostly because I missed out on most of the original and wanted to contribute without derailing that thread any more :P ) So here goes...

You see, the real problem when the cosmere invaded Hogwarts was that the Seekers all joined the Quidditch teams and replaced the snitches with Southern Scadrial Allomantic flying machines that they could keep track of with their Allomancy. But then the Lurchers kept on Pulling the snitches away from them, and the Coinshots would try to send them back to the Seekers. The Seers burned atium so knew what everyone was going to do and dominated. Thugs would grab people off of their broomsticks and throw them around. The final straw, however, was when the the double gold Twinborns would go crazy, harm themselves, then heal. Eventually, it was all stopped. No Allomancers were allowed to play Quidditch ever again.

That was when the Feruchemists decided to get in on the action.

Chromium, Pewter, and Steel Ferrings as Beaters. 'Nuff said.

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The feruchemists were much more strategic than the allomancers because they didn't want to get banned. They always wore their bracers under their quiditch robes and were careful to "throw" a couple of plays so that it didn't look to bad. They always used Chromium ferrings as their goal keepers so that they could make miraculous saves. They used steel ferrings for the chasers so that they could make amazing plays, tin ferrings for seekers so they could see the snitch, and pewter compounders for beaters. Nobody ever got in the way of the beaters. The first year the Feruchemists took over quiditch Hogwarts saw the first fatality from a bludger. It wasn't pretty, Neville fainted, Collin Creavies cousin took a photograph, and proffeser Flitwick was so short that he puked because he was so close that he could see all the mess.

 

Edit :Arg.. I swear I came up with my ideas before seeing Shaggai's post. He ninja'd me.

Edited by CalebTheGeek
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I hope somebody writes the crossover fanfic with Harry the Windrunner, Hermione the Awakener, and Ron the Mistborn fighting Voldemort the Fullborn...

Edited by Two McMillion
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Meanwhile in Cosmere Hogwarts, Kaladin was busy whining about his broomstick.

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Sudden realization like apricity: when Harry's parents died, they were protecting those who could not protect themselves.

So I guess this makes Harry a Windrunner, Ron a Stoneward, and Hermione a Skybreaker.

Edited by Kobold King
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Sudden realization like apricity: when Harry's parents died, they were protecting those who could not protect themselves.

So I guess this makes Harry a Windrunner, Ron a Stoneward, and Hermione a Skybreaker.

Wouldn't that be his parents, not him? So I guess on Roshar, Harry's parents wouldn't get killed: they'd summon their sprenblades, have awesome flying battles with Voldy the Honorblade wielder, and then chop him down. Then they'd live happily ever after with their weekly hypercanes and their man-eating crustaceans.
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Hagrid would love Roshar.

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Sudden realization like apricity: when Harry's parents died, they were protecting those who could not protect themselves.

So I guess this makes Harry a Windrunner, Ron a Stoneward, and Hermione a Skybreaker.

 

(Vomits rainbows of admiration at the ingenuity)

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Hagrid would love Roshar.

His blast-ended skrewts would feel right at home there, too.
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Hermione's S.P.E.W. workings would probably end up expanding to encompass parshmen, and Hagrid would spend much of his time bawling and demanding the gemheart hunts stop immediately. Harry and Kaladin would get together for some quality angst time while Hoid and Dumbledore settle down for a long chat.

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Meanwhile in Cosmere Hogwarts, Kaladin was busy whining about his broomstick.

 

And Syl was suspiciously watching those potionspren.

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Crying from laughter here guys. Good Job!

 

So we find out that McGonagall was a Kandra Elsecaller all along, resulting in her transformation transfiguration of pretty much everything, while Barty Crouch Jnr is a Hemalurgic master resulting in Malfoy's short period as a rat through hemalurgic spiking. Lupin and Wormtail were kandra too, but Wormtail was controlled by Ruin and betrayed Harry's parents. Barty Crouch Jnr is actually OreSure playing Voldemort because the contract doesn't count anymore so he's allowed to be evil and awesome.

 

Crab and Goyle are both Thugs, obviously, while (dare I suggest it?) Slughorn is Kelsier gathering a little crew of his own.

And Dumbledore's army is full of windrunners and their squires, including Aberforth.

 

Also, Hogwarts is Kredik Shaw.

Edited by Delightful
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I was thinking of McGonagall as a Elsecaller, but I really like the Kandra addition. Ernie McMullen is obviousl a Feruchemist, he's so proud of his heavily magical bloodlines. Are the death eaters voidbringers, or Inquisiters? I feel like they lean more towards inquisiters. Dumbledore is a Elantrian with his focus of power being Hogwarts. Proffeser Sprout is a Edgedancer(?), it definitely feels the most organic anyway.The giant squid is a Santhid. The centaurs feel like they were a horse who got spiked with a human, which is why they have prophetic abilities.

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Death Eaters make more sense as Inquisitors is Voldemort is a Metalborn. Oh! Idea! Instead of Horcruxes. Voldemort uses a mixture of hemalurgy and feruchemy to store aspects of his consciousness- so if he ever dies, all his followers have to do is spike some poor sap.

 

But if Dumbledore is an Elantrian, how does his power work so far away from Hogwarts? I think it would make more sense is Dumbledore was a Returned.

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"Hey Harry, did you read,in the Prophet that a Norwegian Ridgeback and a Chasmfiend got into it in the middle of a muggle city? Yeah eventually some Dustbringers and Stonewards showed up to deal with Crabby and some Windrunners and Mistborn teamed up with Wizards to take out the Dragon. 'twas Awesome'

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There's no way in Damnation that the wizarding world would be able to hide greatshells from the general public.

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But if Dumbledore is an Elantrian, how does his power work so far away from Hogwarts? I think it would make more sense is Dumbledore was a Returned.

 I guess it meams that Dumbledore is also a Nicrosil Ferring.

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Cause he can store his power and tap it later.

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When the Alethi exchange students came, duels were immediately banned, because when a wizard pulled out his wand the Alethi summoned a Shardblade. It always ended up with a mountain of scroll work... Also all Alethi males failed every class ever.

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Also all Alethi males failed every class ever.

No, they just have a really good excuse to get girls to do their homework for them.... and pray for oral exams.

Edited by Awesomeness Summoned
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Hehe oral exams huh?

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