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The Last Post Wins!!!!!


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18 hours ago, Truthless of Shinovar said:

The scraggly dog was excited to see the world. Or at least all of the scraggly dogs that the world had to offer. Thousands came from all across the world, ranging from small dogs to large dogs, golden retrievers to golden doodles, all of them scraggly. People travelled from distant cities to behold this mass gathering of scraggly dogs. History had never seen the likes of this before, and the world itself seemed to hold its breath as he judges judged every dog. But they stopped dead in their tracks when they saw the scraggly dog. 

“This... t-this dog.... ITSOSCRAGGLY!!!!” The first judge said.

”Scraggly.... oh so scraggly...” the second judge said, falling into madness upon seeing such scraggliness.

”This dog gets first place! No question!!!” The third judge announced.

The judges didn’t even bother judging the rest of the dogs; they already knew that the scraggly dog was the scraggliest dog on the earth. That’s why the scraggly dog decided to go to the universe competition.

 

The scraggly dog hopped on a handy-dandy FTL spaceship and flew all the way to the Universal scraggly dog contest. Beings from around the galaxies came, all hoping for the title of the universes most scraggly dog, whether they were actually a dog or not. Centipede-like creatures with wings circled around the skies, while beasts with long antenna and tails burrowed beneath the ground, and dogs with bioluminescent fur bounded about. Things with thousands of heads, plant creatures growing from one place to the other, dragons that looked like chickens, chickens that looked like dragons, small creatures smaller than a thumbnail, and thousands of other kinds of creatures milled about the place, all waiting for their turn to be judged. To win, they needed all three of the judges absolute approval. The judges were a tough lot to impress as well. They had been gathered from the depths of the universe, the hardest men and women to be impressed. Rocks were more likely to gasp at the scraggliness of the dogs.

The judges began to make their way to the scraggly dog. He felt very very confident; there was nothing near his level of scraggliness. The judges were just three dogs away from him, and his heart began to beat faster. 

Two dogs away, and he began to sweat. Despite his confidence, he couldn’t help but feel worried.

One dog away, and the scraggly dog began to pace. This was it. 

The judges came to the scraggly dog.

 

”HOLY SMOKES! THIS DOG IS THE SCRAGGLIEST THING I’VE SEEN IN MY LIFE!” The first judge said, utter surprise showing on his face. The scraggly dog’s heart began to soar. He was the scraggliest dog alive!

 

 

”THIS.

DOG.

IS.

THE.

SCRAGGLIEST.

THING.

I.

HAVE.

EVER.

SEEN.”

the second judge said, falling to his knees in awe at the pure scragliness he saw. The scraggly dog jumped for joy. He was going to win! 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

“Meh. I’ve seen better,” the third judge said.

Edited by Truthless of Shinovar
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