Messydesk

Shallan and Adolin's wedding gifts from Cosmere characters

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After finishing Oathbringer and being really disappointed we didn't get to see the actual wedding;_; I was wondering what Kaladin and Bridge Four would give Adolin as a wedding gift. Definitely not a sword like everyone else did since that would be too "normal". Adolin would deserve something similar as Shallan with those boots.

First I thought about posting this on the Stormlight Archive section and list what other characters would've given them, but then I thought it would be funnier to include all Cosmere characters.

So, what do you think other characters would've given Shallan and Adolin for their wedding gift? I'll start with few and probably write down some more at work today since it'll be a slow day anyway.

Ruin (and probably Harmony too now that I think about it) would give an earring for each.

Wit would give a lengthy insult in a form of a musical.

Wayne would trade a half eaten rollkebab chouta to a sketch from Shallan's sketchpad.

Jasnah would give a lecture for both about how to be in a proper relationship since single people usually give the best relationship advice anyway.

Vin would give Adolin a chance to duel a Mistborn.

Sazed (not yet Harmony) would give a presentation of few religions out of his copperminds to offer a replacement for dead Almighty.

Pattern would happily buzz the permission to mate.

Kelsier... would probably just rob them and give nothing except a smile when leaving the party with his loot.

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And Odium would give them

Spoiler

Neverending hate in the form of an infinite cycle of incredibly painful and extremely messy torture. :D

 

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Posted (edited)

Marsh(inquisitor-form under Harmony's reign) would probably try to give a reasonable wholesome wedding gift. Yaknow normal stuff but fails on giving it cause everybody freaks out seeing a huge person who can glide midair and have railroad spikes in place of his eyes. 

Ham would send a wedding card with a philosophical thought inside. Shallan would be psyched , adolin would ask where the actual gift is.

Stormfather would most likely just threaten them not to break oaths. That's it no gifts if they insist on giving a gift he might just send a highstorm. He'd consider that a gift

Aona(if alive) would revel on their marriage and devotion so she probably things for their betterment. Skaze(if alive) would probably just send bdsm tools with notes of instructions. 

Sadeas would send a cake baked with poison.

Tensoon would send a letter saying "no I will not attend your wedding" and MeLaan would decline politely but would already be in the wedding without them knowing anyways.

 

(Did I do things correctly ?) 

 

Edited by goody153
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Steris would give them her anatomy book (with pictures :o)

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23 hours ago, I think I am here. said:

And Odium would give them

  Reveal hidden contents

Neverending hate in the form of an infinite cycle of incredibly painful and extremely messy torture. :D

 

Poor present, they already did to themself... it's called marriage :P

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On 2.10.2018 at 11:50 AM, I think I am here. said:

And Odium would give them

  Reveal hidden contents

Neverending hate in the form of an infinite cycle of incredibly painful and extremely messy torture. :D

 

7 hours ago, Yata said:

Poor present, they already did to themself... it's called marriage :P

I wonder if Shallan will create another version of herself to act as the perfect or "perfect" wife... Okay most likely not since she already spends time with Adolin in each of her current versions. But it would be funny. Though I am interested in seeing how their marriage works out and how it'll evolve their relationship.

10 hours ago, goody153 said:

Marsh(inquisitor-form under Harmony's reign) would probably try to give a reasonable wholesome wedding gift. Yaknow normal stuff but fails on giving it cause everybody freaks out seeing a huge person who can glide midair and have railroad spikes in place of his eyes. 

Ham would send a wedding card with a philosophical thought inside. Shallan would be psyched , adolin would ask where the actual gift is.

Stormfather would most likely just threaten them not to break oaths. That's it no gifts if they insist on giving a gift he might just send a highstorm. He'd consider that a gift

Aona(if alive) would revel on their marriage and devotion so she probably things for their betterment. Skaze(if alive) would probably just send bdsm tools with notes of instructions. 

Sadeas would send a cake baked with poison.

Tensoon would send a letter saying "no I will not attend your wedding" and MeLaan would decline politely but would already be in the wedding without them knowing anyways.

These are perfectxD! Poor Marsh... I bet Kelsier set him up, promising he would come with him so people wouldn't be so scared of his appearance and then Kel ditches him and goes rummaging around the palace. And I can totally see Stormfather sending a highstorm and calling it a gift. Kaladin would consider it a gift though.

MeLaan... damnation I wish she could be in Roshar causing trouble. 

7 hours ago, Solant said:

Steris would give them her anatomy book (with pictures :o)

Haha Shallan would probably draw her own version of that book!

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Rock will make them stew.

Lift will steal that stew, consume half, and give Adolin and Shallan the other half.

She will then proceed to consume the last half.

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Posted (edited)

Kaladin held back a smile as Adolin held up the jacket.  Skar and Drehy had gleefully been sent to scour the market for the most absurd looking piece of "fashion" they could find.  They had not disappointed.  It was a ridiculous bit, ruffs and fluffs in the strangest places with buttons that defied logic.  The colors were....an interesting choice as well.

"In case you need a spare outfit for the next trip Shadesmar," Kaladin said.

Adolin gave a whistle. "This is incredible, bridge boy."

"We thought so too," he said back with a smile.

"Did you look through my folios?  I mean, you got all the details.  It's even incorporating the new half flip style out of Thaylenah."

Kaladin's smiled slipped. "What?"

Adolin was turning the jacket back to front.  He wasn't....actually admiring the storming thing was he?

Edited by Zellyia
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Posted (edited)

Breeze would come claiming he'd brought no gift and just wanted to enjoy their wine and food, but he'd be soothing away all anxiety and stress to make sure the couple had a happy wedding day.

I'm pretty sure Gavinor would try to give them each a pair of Gavinor sized cake and frosting hand prints on their clothes, but hopefully someone stepped in and prevented that.

Edited by Singer
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Siri and Susebron would give an awakened doll for their child(ren) to play with.

Wax would give each a gun.

Demoux would give copies of Sazed's books. 

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Silence would send them Elkohar's shade in a box, a bag of silver dust and a silver knife. On the package would be a note with instructions on the care and feeding of shade.

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Marasi would give them a book about murders and other crimes in married couples and give looong advice how to avoid that.

 

Tanavast would jump out of the cake and shout "April you fools, I am alive all the time!!!" 

 

Wayne would teach Shallan how to steal accents.

Lopen would stick Adolin to the wall and court Shallan to be king of Aletkar again without realizing, that Adolin is potential heir, and not Shallan.

Chasmfiend would passionately ki(ss/ll) both of them.

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On 3.10.2018 at 11:31 PM, Zellyia said:

Kaladin held back a smile as Adolin held up the jacket.  Skar and Drehy had gleefully been sent to scour the market for the most absurd looking piece of "fashion" they could find.  They had not disappointed.  It was a ridiculous bit, ruffs and fluffs in the strangest places with buttons that defied logic.  The colors were....an interesting choice as well.

"In case you need a spare outfit for the next trip Shadesmar," Kaladin said.

Adolin gave a whistle. "This is incredible, bridge boy."

"We thought so too," he said back with a smile.

"Did you look through my folios?  I mean, you got all the details.  It's even incorporating the new half flip style out of Thaylenah."

Kaladin's smiled slipped. "What?"

Adolin was turning the jacket back to front.  He wasn't....actually admiring the storming thing was he?

I want this to be canon so bad right nowxD! Just perfect.

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1 hour ago, NoiseSpren said:

Tanavast would jump out of the cake and shout "April you fools, I am alive all the time!!!" 

Random dude: "Who invited this guy ?"

Szeth : "Assassin !" 

Dalinar: "Where have you been ?" 

Bridge 4: "should we uhm muscle this guy out"

Odium: "wat" 

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Vin and Elend would probably congratulate them on marrying the one they love.

Cultivation would... cultivate their love!

Nightblood would offer to bring death to whatever they deem evil

Hoid would be random

Khriss would ask them to demonstrate Stormlight and Shardblades so she could analyze them for her Arcanum

Wayne would exchange all the presents for something he deems appropriate but isn't

Susebron and Siri might offer them a chance of getting a taste of true color by giving a few breaths from the treasury

Spook would give them something but they'd be confused by his street slang to know what exactly it is

I could imagine Sarene offering Adolin a chance to fence and beat him at it

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Hoid would give Adolin some priceless musical instrument with a neat history that we'll never really know, perhaps a lyre and play it fantastically with an equally enthralling story as the accompaniment. Adolin would narrow his eyes and wonder what's the joke but play it off because he's awesome like that. Hoid would than expect Adolin to play it fantastically well on his way through Roshar later on and tell him not to lose it. 

Source, am Hoid.

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