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The Tragedy of Thaylen Field


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  • 1 month later...
17 hours ago, Ark1002 said:

Thanks! This was great!

My one problem, even if odium got Dalinar, wouldn't there be at least some minor victories for the other side?

I get what you're saying and I probably could have included a few more nicer moments to contrast the bad. I still let Renarin beat the thunderclast, I couldn't off him without at least giving him that but I will take this into account for the next couple of chapters (It looks like this will only last 2 or 3 more chapters). Thanks for the feedback!

11 hours ago, LadyLameness said:

Jebus, your Taln fan girl is showing :P 

But, wow. Way to give us hope then take it away D:

Yeah, I'm not even going to hide the fact I goddamn love Taln. I would have had him singlehandedly save all of Roshar this chapter but I felt that would have gone against the spirit of this fic. I'm glad I had the desired affect!

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  • 3 weeks later...

Thanks a lot for this! And I really like the bit with Rock saying Kaladin would be back. This is probably the most masterful one so far.

Also, how did they help with the chapter?

Hey, @Ooklalord Jebus, any interest in joining a writer's guild? Cause I think you'd fit right in.

Edited by Ookla the Ookla
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5 hours ago, Ookla the Ookla said:

Thanks a lot for this! And I really like the bit with Rock saying Kaladin would be back. This is probably the most masterful one so far.

Also, how did they help with the chapter?

Hey, @Ooklalord Jebus, any interest in joining a writer's guild? Cause I think you'd fit right in.

Glad you liked it!

Alyssum helped me a lot with grammer and capitlisation (I'm really bad at remembering 's and punctuation around speech marks, they're good at them). Ladymxdnight helped with the plotting and pacing of a lot of it. For example, I originally had them appear inside the Oathgate building until Lady pointed out that the platform is a wide open space that, in Thaylen City, had been converted into a statue garden so I had to rewrite that whole section.

And I've never thought about it really. This is my first time writing something this long and complex. Most of my writing projects never break 5k (Tragedy is now up to 13k).

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21 minutes ago, Ooklalord Jebus said:

Glad you liked it!

Alyssum helped me a lot with grammer and capitlisation (I'm really bad at remember 's and punctuation around speech marks, she's good at them). Ladymxdnight helped with the plotting and pacing of a lot of it. For example, I originally had them appear inside the Oathgate building until Lady pointed out that the platform is a wide open space that, in Thaylen City, had been converted into a statue garden so I had to rewrite that whole section.

And I've never thought about it really. This is my first time writing something this long and complex. Most of my writing projects never break 5k (Tragedy is now up to 13k).

So, Do you want to join?

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Happy to help, Jebus! I really enjoyed this chapter. It's so interesting to see this exploration of how things could have gone (though admittedly, I am very displeased by Taln's and Renarin's deaths). Eager to see what's next for Jasnah and Ash since right now I'm anxious for their safety. Also, Szeth

EDIT: I still have hope for Ash okay, you can't murderate two Heralds even if you're psycho!Dalinar

Edited by ladymxdnight
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On 29/11/2018 at 6:45 PM, Ookla the Drunk said:

So, Do you want to join?

Oh I didn't realise I was being propositioned for a specific guild! Maybe some other time :D

On 29/11/2018 at 10:47 PM, ladymxdnight said:

Happy to help, Jebus! I really enjoyed this chapter. It's so interesting to see this exploration of how things could have gone (though admittedly, I am very displeased by Taln's and Renarin's deaths). Eager to see what's next for Jasnah and Ash since right now I'm anxious for their safety. Also, Szeth

EDIT: I still have hope for Ash okay, you can't murderate two Heralds even if you're psycho!Dalinar

If I was you, I'd be worried for everyones safety.

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On 11/29/2018 at 11:11 PM, Ookla the Dragon Reborn said:

But you can if you're me. Read the Sanderson elimination. I did kill two Heralds.

gasp you monsteR

21 hours ago, Ooklalord Jebus said:

If I was you'd, I'd be worried for everyones safety.

bUT you've killed everyone else that matters to me! (well, maybe i'm a bit worried for Shallan, too...)

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  • 3 weeks later...
On 12/3/2018 at 8:18 AM, Ooklalord Jebus said:

Oh I didn't realise I was being propositioned for a specific guild! Maybe some other time :D

On 11/29/2018 at 2:47 PM, ladymxdnight said:

Is a guild for writing... we just discuss writing, less a guild then a group talking about our works... but okay.

Also, hope you don't mind, but I completely stole your idea and I'm writing a story of if Ruin won.

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  • 2 weeks later...
  • 3 weeks later...

Here's a little post-word for those interested:

Spoiler

 

Hi everyone!

I hope you’ve enjoyed The Tragedy of Thaylen Fields. This is by far the largest writing project I’ve ever completed and I’ve thoroughly enjoyed it.

First things first, I’d like to thank @Alyssum314for their continuous efforts to make sure my apostrophes and commas were in the right place. Turns out I absolutely suck at knowing when to end speech with a full stop or a comma and Lyss helped me a lot with this. I’d also like to thank @ladymxdnight for helping me with plotting, structure and another general grammar checker. If it weren’t for her, you’d have had Amaram using the Destruction sure and would have more than a few sections end on duds. Lastly, thank you to Jaffa6 on discord for his help with grammar and wording.

Now, if you’d indulge me, here’s some fun facts about the writing of Tragedy:

● The entire reason I wrote this fic was the scene where Nightblood kills Pattern. For years, people have asked what would happen if NB and a Shardblade clashed. My answer, since before OB came out, was that NB would eat the Shardblade immediately. Ever since NB turned up in WoR, I’ve hoped we’d see this in the books but until then, I wanted to write my interpretation of it. I wanted it to be Syl originally but I foolishly killed Kal in the first chapter so couldn’t use him! I liked how it turned out anyway.

● Something that surprised me was that Shallan was the hardest character for me to write, by a long shot. I almost didn’t write any PoV’s for her because I struggled so much with her. By contrast, Jasnah came to me as the easiest by far. I don’t know if it’s just because we don’t see anywhere near as much of her internal thoughts so it makes it easier to fill in those gaps with my own interpretation of the character or because I’m just more like her irl than I am Shallan. Either way, this is why we got a lot of Jasnah PoV’s.

● Another inspiration of this fic is a sequence known as the Eclipse from the manga Berserk. If you’ve read it, I hope this makes sense. If you haven’t, I highly recommend Berserk under the warning that you’re going to see some crem in it that makes my fic look likes a kids book. I tried to emulate the feelings I had during the Eclipse in this fic. Of horror and disgust and just a brutal emotional ride. I hope I succeeded.

● For the Dalinar chapters, I went back and read the Marsh chapters from HoA. Those were heavily influential in those parts, with Dalinar both moving on his own within the orders that Odium had given him and other times completely controlled by Odium.

Anyway, I hope you enjoyed this terrible, awful ride. Thank you to everyone for reading and your feedback. I appreciate every single comment I get on these. Never forget, if you ever want to do something like this yourself, all you have got to do is write.

I doubt this will be the last thing I ever write, and hopefully this won’t be the last thing you ever read of mine.

Thank you all, and see you around.

 

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@Overlord Jebus, I’m screaming into my pillow for two reasons right now: 

1. All of the deaths... I’m honestly in shock. 

2. This story is over. 

Thank you so much for a great 2-3 months of heartbreak and incredible writing. I look forward to seeing what you write in the future, because in all honesty, this is the best Cosmere fan work I’ve had the privilege of reading. :D 

Edited by Ashspren
Typos, typos, and more typos.
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