ElephantEarwax

The Longest Thread (Misadventures)

37,685 posts in this topic

15 minutes ago, xinoehp512 said:

Michael closed his eyes. "Show me," he whispered.

The pen buzzed in his hand.

In front of him, a small podium with a painting on it materialized into existence, depicting a man standing impassively in a field, watching chaos...

...and then it began to move.

On 3/12/2020 at 4:31 PM, xinoehp512 said:

Jacob watched the events unfolding with interest. He summoned his clipboard. Then he summoned his pen.

But nothing came.

 

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"Am I... missing something?" Granite asked.

Sophie hushed him. "Shh!! Let the plot happen!"

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Nameless decided to start a war. He went to recruit some legendary heroes to help him battle the deadly warrior-mages of Atlantis and Themyscira. He picked Chitori the Parsh warrior, sole user of heroform, Jamek king of Boomland, wielder of the blastaxe of DOOM, Saral the amazon, champion of Olympus, and Cheldeth, Dustbringer of the fifth ideal, spiked with allomantic pewter and bronze, wielder of Amberite, and a mighty sand Mastrell.

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Truthless laughed as he summoned Chuck Norris to defeat them all.

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FT knitted a hat, quietly, in the corner.

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10 hours ago, Truthless of Shinovar said:

Truthless laughed as he summoned Chuck Norris to defeat them all.

Nameless summoned Taln and Kaladin to defeat Chuck Norris.

9 hours ago, The Awakened Salad said:

Salad asked why Nameless started so many conflicts. 

Nameless decided to test his warrior's strength by attacking Salad.

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But no one would ever break the walls of the Cup God’s Cup Fort, it was just a fact of life.

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Because the walls fell over on their own.

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Which was assumed to have been sabotage by enemies of the state.

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But it was really just shoddy workmanship, gravity, and a little wind.

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A.C moved the cup fort to space, where there was no gravity or wind. Now the cup fort was impenetrable. 

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But the cup fort was unable to keep out the solar radiation.

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15 hours ago, The Awakened Salad said:

Salad asked why Nameless started so many conflicts. 

Author Void seconded this.

50 minutes ago, Ishar said:

But the cup fort was unable to keep out the solar radiation.

Due to the gaping hole in its roof.

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17 minutes ago, Jaywalk said:

Author Void seconded this.

Nameless looked over at Author Void from the ruins of Salad's house, and asked him if he could repeat what he just said.

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Butt Venture ventured out of GHANDERFLAFFLE empire to observe all the crap that went on.

Edited by Yvainnie
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Nameless recruited him.

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Little Bear summoned the giant rainbow Caterpillars of Peace to calm Nameless.

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2 hours ago, Nameless said:

Nameless looked over at Author Void from the ruins of Salad's house, and asked him if he could repeat what he just said.

“WHY YOU BE VIOLENT?”

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8 hours ago, Nameless said:

Nameless decided to test his warrior's strength by attacking Salad.

Salad put up an impenetrable lettuce shield and asked why Nameless was fighting them. 

2 hours ago, Nameless said:

Nameless looked over at Author Void from the ruins of Salad's house, and asked him if he could repeat what he just said.

Salad asked why Nameless wanted to destroy their house. 

19 minutes ago, Jaywalk said:

“WHY YOU BE VIOLENT?”

“YES, WHY YOU BE A VIOLENT HUMAN?” 

Edited by The Awakened Salad
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59 minutes ago, Jaywalk said:

“WHY YOU BE VIOLENT?”

"ME IS VIOLENT BECAUSE VIOLENT IS FUN!"

41 minutes ago, The Awakened Salad said:

Salad put up an impenetrable lettuce shield and asked why Nameless was fighting them. 

Nameless pulled out the bedrock breaking guide.

44 minutes ago, The Awakened Salad said:

Salad asked why Nameless wanted to destroy their house. 

Nameless continued to grief everything in sight with his merry band of "heroes"

45 minutes ago, The Awakened Salad said:

“YES, WHY YOU BE A VIOLENT HUMAN?” 

"ME LIKE BE VIOLENT HUMAN. IS FUN!"

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On 4/2/2020 at 9:55 PM, xinoehp512 said:

The pen buzzed in his hand.

In front of him, a small podium with a painting on it materialized into existence, depicting a man standing impassively in a field, watching chaos...

...and then it began to move.

 

On 3/12/2020 at 4:31 PM, xinoehp512 said:

His heart rate jumped up a beat or two. He tried summoning it again. No luck.

What was this? His pen should be completely invulnerable to theft. It was completely cut off from everything. He'd hidden it practically inside his soul, for goodness sake! 
And besides, he had Fate protecting it. He would never allow another Author to steal such a valuable possession. Surely?
Feeling unease creep through his veins, he called Fate to answer for what had happened.

No answer. No answer.

Jacob began to break into a cold sweat, attempting to summon his pen again and again. Still, no luck.

He kept his demeanor calm, however. The worst that could happen to him was only death, after all.

 

The message-painting continued to play.

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7 minutes ago, xinoehp512 said:

The message-painting continued to play.

Nameless slapped his forehead and asked @xinoehp512 if he could fast-forward things a bit.

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Once upon a time there was a jellyfish. It was inside an anti-violence forcefield. 

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But not an anti-combat, anti-murder, or even an anti-death forcefield, so Nameless hacked it into pieces.

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