ElephantEarwax

The Longest Thread (Misadventures)

17,394 posts in this topic

And decided to have a competition to determine who could do the most epic backflipz.

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One of them broke his back.

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Posted (edited)

Because his grandson had stepped on a crack.

Edited by Lunamor
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Posted (edited)

...causing the third World War.

Edited by Taradiddle
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And a bombshell had been launched directly into his back.

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Posted (edited)

Fortunately for him, there wasn't a bomb inside.

Edited by Gancho Libre
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It still broke his back, though.

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He was paralyzed for the rest of his life...

and, unfortunately, in the Beyond.

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It stunk. So did the skunk next to him named...

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He was very self conscious of his smell. 

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So he bought Febreeze religiously. 

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Meaning he bought it in order to worship it.

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Posted (edited)

Kelsier was jealous of all of the attention Murathulian paid Febreeze, so he had new statues of himself built all over Roshar.

Edited by Shard of Thought
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Posted (edited)

Unfortunately, they made them of Himself, not Kelsier. He was furious.

Edited by Lunamor
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So furious, in fact, that he...

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Decked the builders of the statues.

What else?

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That's all he knows. :P

The builders fled to Nalthis safety.

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And promptly had their Breaths stolen.

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They promptly Suffocated.

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they recovered from the gasp

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But were still Drab. This made them depressed.

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so they wore bright colors

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Not bolded.

So they decided to take someone else's Breath away.

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Posted (edited)

With a beautiful performance of a song!

Edited by Lunamor
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