Aon Ati

Rules for Surviving a Fantasy World

233 posts in this topic

174. If you're a villain, DO NOT MONOLOGUE. No matter what.

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On 7/27/2018 at 11:08 AM, AonEne said:

174. If you're a villain, DO NOT MONOLOGUE. No matter what.

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175. Always keep a piece of cake in you pocket. You never know when you need to bribe someone.

176. Don't follow a treasure map, especially if they tell you that the treasure is still there. There is a reason for that!

177. Never ever enter an unknown cave.

178. Don't go to suspicious meetings on a graveyard.

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13 hours ago, Sorana said:

177. Never ever enter an unknown cave.

178. Don't go to suspicious meetings on a graveyard.

179. Never enter a known cave.

180. Don't go to any meetings anywhere with anyone ever.

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181. All myths and tales are automatically true, or close to true.

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182. Don't talk about religion with the inhabitants. You never know if they have an inquisition lurking around.

183. Don't talk with the inhabitants in general.

184. Expect everyone to deceive you.

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185: If your friend vanished under mysterious circumstances, and you find evidence that they were talking with strange people/demons, don’t go looking for them. If they are not dead, then they are the protagonist and if you look for them, you will die. If they are already dead, then you will become the protagonist and everyone you care about is 80% more likely to die painfully.

 

Edit: 300th post! Yeah!

Edited by Life&Death
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186. Don't cross Hoid's plans.

Edited by Sorana
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2 hours ago, Sorana said:

186. Don't carry any metal on your body.

this one is probably too specific.  it would work in mistnorn, but get you killed in Shadows for Silence

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7 hours ago, Dunkum said:

this one is probably too specific.  it would work in mistnorn, but get you killed in Shadows for Silence

You're right, I forgot about that one. I'll edit

I was thinking about some ents we met and didn't Think it the. Sry

Edited by Sorana
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187. In the event you are in space, don't answer distress calls.

188. In the event you ignored rule 187, make sure to do a thorough scan of the distressed ship before going aboard. If there are no obvious signs of life, immediately turn the ship around and leave.

189. Don't get in a fight with your significant other right before they go on a quest. This greatly increases the chance you will die while they are gone.

190. Stay away from dark alleys.

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191. Pirates can be jolly good fun half the time, and the other half they aren't. 

192. Only stay away from dark alleys if the guy in the alley is offering you cookies, but doesn't specify what's in them. 

193. Keep your back to a wall when you're searching a dark room. Or any room. 

194. Don't trust artificial life forms.

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195. Aliens will always either try to kill you, or help propel you to the next stage of evelution. Either way you should avoid them at all costs.

196. Anything to do with Artificial Intelligence will end badly and with lots of people dying.

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197. If you live in a rural, pastoral, or otherwise idyllic area, not generally regarded by the world, you are about to become the protagonist;)

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198. If you're working for a villain, don't tell them the hero or heroine is dead when you technically don't know that. You will be wrong.

199. Don't decline stories from men with white hair. (Looking at you, Miss Savage.)

200. Use common sense. It sounds so obvious, but just...do.

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I haven't read them all, so sorry if this is a repeat.

201: if it looks haunted, it is.

202: listen to old guys, they are very wise.

203: don't go into the forest at night.

204: carry food with you always.

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In the unfortunate case you’re a protagonist....

205. If you trust someone, they’re your enemy

206. If you think your life isn’t at all special, check again 

207. Don’t assume anything. For all you know you could have been switched at birth and are really important 

208. All plans go wrong, so don’t plan

209. Don’t ever be mean. Payback  will come.

210. Someone you meet is going to save your life - thank them in advance

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211. In the case that you're a mentor character... Don't get used to living.

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212. If someone invites you on a quest to defeat some evil force/being stay close as the life you save is your own.

213. Never refuse the request of the old beggar at your door it will end badly.

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214. If someone seems crazy, they most likely aren't; but rather a guide who will aid your quest.

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215. If you've found yourself not dead yet but not the protagonist, immediately become a direct opposite to the protagonist in any way conceivable, thereby solidifying you as the fan favorite (and now unkillable) edgy rival.

Edited by QueenOfInk
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216. Don't force your father to disembowel himself.

217. READ THIS LIST.

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218: If you break the fourth wall, be ready for weird side effects.

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219: In case you ignored rule number 2 and are in any sort of suspicious place (IE a dark forest, abandoned city or temple, monster cave, other cave, etc.), do not lie to your mentor/friend/anyone at all really who asks if you took anything.

220: Be the protagonist. While you may have some emotional damage by the end of the story, you will very likely remain alive.

221: In the event that you are far from home, and your main storyline is about you getting back home, do not stop for ANYTHING.

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222: If you find yourself alone, and hear a strange noise, run.

223: if you are the protagonist and are gravley injured, dont worry! You'll be healed one way or another. Unless its a horror story.

224: in the event that you wake up with powers one day, be ready for tough times ahead.

225 (for @Ashspren): If a person does anything remotly strange around another person of the gender they are attracted to, its a crush and/or romance.

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