Sami Posted November 18, 2018 Author Report Share Posted November 18, 2018 (edited) Spoiler Edited November 18, 2018 by Sami resized 13 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mistrunner Posted December 5, 2018 Report Share Posted December 5, 2018 Why couldn't Beethoven find his music teacher? Because he was Haydn! 9 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ashspren Posted January 20, 2019 Report Share Posted January 20, 2019 (edited) Near or far, wherEEEEEEver you are, I do know that this thread must live on... Edit: Should I put the images in a spoiler tag? Yes, yes I should. Spoiler Edited January 20, 2019 by Ashspren 10 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Showman Posted January 31, 2019 Report Share Posted January 31, 2019 Why did the percussionist play the crash cymbals? He couldn't handle the suspense! 8 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Ink Posted February 3, 2019 Report Share Posted February 3, 2019 (edited) Oh man, that’s surprisingly accurate. I’m probably the 2nd on T-bone, but most of the others are the first edit: to this one beneath me. It got moved Edited February 4, 2019 by Ink 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vogelsang Posted February 3, 2019 Report Share Posted February 3, 2019 My previous post was deleted because I was an idiot and had language not allowed on forums in it. Yeah, I really should of known the rules regarding language in pictures. Anyway, I did my best to edit the language into an understandable and viewer friendly form. 9 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Jaywalk Posted February 4, 2019 Report Share Posted February 4, 2019 On 2/3/2019 at 11:49 AM, Daybone said: My previous post was deleted because I was an idiot and had language not allowed on forums in it. Yeah, I really should of known the rules regarding language in pictures. Anyway, I did my best to edit the language into an understandable and viewer friendly form. This is so true... 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vogelsang Posted February 5, 2019 Report Share Posted February 5, 2019 This beauty has been hanging up in my school’s band room all year, so I figured I’d show it to you. 6 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kureshi Ironclaw Posted February 6, 2019 Report Share Posted February 6, 2019 On 2/4/2019 at 5:49 AM, Daybone said: My previous post was deleted because I was an idiot and had language not allowed on forums in it. Yeah, I really should of known the rules regarding language in pictures. Anyway, I did my best to edit the language into an understandable and viewer friendly form. Every Bari sax player I've met is female. Am I doing this wrong? 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Zephrun’s Imperium Posted February 7, 2019 Report Share Posted February 7, 2019 Alright, funny story. In our band we only have two percussionists, so a lot of times we have other players fill in for different parts. Anyway, our teacher asked if our percussionists could fit the triangle into the song we're playing. Immediately one of the tubas raised their hand and our teacher said, "Not a chance, tubas, you guys didn't pass the test in 5th grade." 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sami Posted February 16, 2019 Author Report Share Posted February 16, 2019 9 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sunbird Posted February 18, 2019 Report Share Posted February 18, 2019 On 2/15/2019 at 9:17 PM, Sami said: Alternatively: "Gotta go to marching band practice." 5 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Faceless Mist-Wraith Posted February 21, 2019 Report Share Posted February 21, 2019 13 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kelsier'sGodComplex Posted February 26, 2019 Report Share Posted February 26, 2019 Why couldn't the string orchestra find their conductor? He was Haydn. What is Beethoven's favorite food? BANANA-NAAAA 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kelsier'sGodComplex Posted February 26, 2019 Report Share Posted February 26, 2019 Middle C, E flat, and G walk into a bar. "Sorry, we don't serve minors." 2 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kelsier'sGodComplex Posted February 26, 2019 Report Share Posted February 26, 2019 My sister, @Mailnaise plays viola, so I'm allowed to do this one. What do a viola and a lawsuit have in common? Everyone is relieved when the case is closed. 4 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kidpen Posted February 26, 2019 Report Share Posted February 26, 2019 Hey, fyi God Complex, the moderators frown on posting multiple times in a row. If you have more to say, just edit your original post. The jokes are very good though! 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kelsier'sGodComplex Posted February 27, 2019 Report Share Posted February 27, 2019 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mailnaise Posted February 27, 2019 Report Share Posted February 27, 2019 22 hours ago, Kelsier'sGodComplex said: My sister, @Mailnaise plays viola, so I'm allowed to do this one. What do a viola and a lawsuit have in common? Everyone is relieved when the case is closed. Correction, it means you aren't allowed, okay? What about cello jokes, @Kelsier'sGodComplex, huh? I play in better tune than you do... (jkjk) 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kelsier'sGodComplex Posted February 27, 2019 Report Share Posted February 27, 2019 1 hour ago, Mailnaise said: Correction, it means you aren't allowed, okay? What about cello jokes, @Kelsier'sGodComplex, huh? I play in better tune than you do... (jkjk) Cellos aren't the butt of any jokes that I know of. Of course you could change any music joke to make a cello joke, but there is no original ones. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mailnaise Posted February 27, 2019 Report Share Posted February 27, 2019 1 hour ago, Kelsier'sGodComplex said: Cellos aren't the butt of any jokes that I know of. Of course you could change any music joke to make a cello joke, but there is no original ones. How convenient...I bet there are cello jokes if you looked for them 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kelsier'sGodComplex Posted February 27, 2019 Report Share Posted February 27, 2019 I'd rather remain ignorant of them, if there is any. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Sami Posted March 3, 2019 Author Report Share Posted March 3, 2019 On 28/02/2019 at 2:48 AM, Kelsier'sGodComplex said: Cellos aren't the butt of any jokes that I know of. Of course you could change any music joke to make a cello joke, but there is no original ones. A violinist noticed at the end of each rehearsal break, one of the cellists would look at the inside flap of his jacket before he sat down to resume rehearsal. This continued for several decades, and the violinist became quite curious about it. One day, during hot weather, the cellist took off his jacket and went off on break. The violinist waited until everyone was off the platform, looked around, and sneaked over to the jacket. He pulled back the flap and saw a little note pinned on the inside. It read: "Cello left hand, bow right." yeah I looked it up. who knows if it's original or not. 1 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Kelsier'sGodComplex Posted March 3, 2019 Report Share Posted March 3, 2019 13 hours ago, Sami said: A violinist noticed at the end of each rehearsal break, one of the cellists would look at the inside flap of his jacket before he sat down to resume rehearsal. This continued for several decades, and the violinist became quite curious about it. One day, during hot weather, the cellist took off his jacket and went off on break. The violinist waited until everyone was off the platform, looked around, and sneaked over to the jacket. He pulled back the flap and saw a little note pinned on the inside. It read: "Cello left hand, bow right." yeah I looked it up. who knows if it's original or not. That's just mean, but some the cellists in my orchestra need that. One of them stopped in the middle of a preformance to BRUSH HIS HAIR! When I talked to him about it later, he accused me of doing it. I do not like that cellist. 0 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Showman Posted March 6, 2019 Report Share Posted March 6, 2019 (edited) *spoilers didn't work out as planned, just open everything* Here's a couple: First, I got this song in band. It's not supposed to be a joke (it's a very serious song), but it's hard not to laugh at it. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eb-efaaygH4 These are the pictures of the music. The first page is mostly resting. (poor flutes on oboe parts play 21 notes total) The back is just ridiculous. I think the song should be summarized like this: Lastly, a band joke my science teacher told me: A Russian, a Cuban, a Band Director, and a Trumpet player are on a train. The Russian takes out some vodka, takes a sip, and throws the bottle out the window. The others are aghast. "Why would you do that?" they asked. "That's authentic, expensive vodka!". The Russian waves them away. "I've got plenty where I live. It's common. I don't need it." Next, the Cuban pulls out a cigar, takes a smoke, and throws the cigar out the window. The others, once again, are astonished. "Why would you do that?" they asked. "That's an authentic, expensive cigar!". The Cuban waves them away. "I've got plenty where I live, almost too many. They're too common. I don't need any more." Then, the band director picks up the trumpet player and throws him out the window. Edited March 6, 2019 by Showman Spoilers didn't work out 7 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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