Captains Domon

Entertainment Reviews(and Debate)

167 posts in this topic

In this topic, you can vent your feelings about any movie, tv show, actor, etc. I tried this in a topic in @Quiver's Spider-Man: Homecoming and worked pretty well. (I got a downvote.) Here, you can vent your feelings and I'll make a rule. Don't give people downvotes. It is their honest opinion and if they hate something in a movie you people like, you can counteract their claim with whatever you come up with. This is officially the Entertainment Discussion debate topic. It'll basically be a negative review. Let's begin with one of the worst superhero movies ever. X-Men Origins: Wolverine.

I have a lot of problems with this movie. First and foremost, DEADPOOL!! 20TH CENTURY FOX, WHAT THE $%#@ WERE YOU THINKING???!!! DEADPOOL HAS NONE OF THE POWERS SHOWN IN THAT STUPID MOVIE!! SHOOTING LASERS?? KATANAS IN HIS ARMS?? GETTING CONTROLLED BY A COMPUTER?? FREAKING HAVING HIS MOUTH STITCHED UP???!! There is a reason Deadpool is called the Merc with a Mouth, and looking like a cheesy knockoff of Slender Man isn't it! Second, Gambit. I'm not saying he wasn't good, it's just that he's barely in it. He's one of the best parts of the movie, but his screen time is way too short. Thirdly, the CGI. All of the CGI is poorly done in this film, especially Wolverine's claws, the fake Patrick Stewart, and that part when Logan is chopping up the ladder. Fourthly, Agent Zero. Out of all the terrible characters in this film, he was the cheesiest and the most annoying and I'm glad he died.

Finally, the continuity issues. In future films, they manage to fix errors pretty well. But there are two major ones not fixed. One, STUPID STRYKER. :angry: The guy who played him was a terrible actor to begin with, but in Days of Future Past, he looks younger and it's a little confusing, because Logan hasn't changed the timeline yet. Second, if Logan and Sabretooth fought in the Vietnam War, and were sentenced to death, what happened to Sabretooth? Stryker apparently doesn't find them, but Logan is shown in the U.S. later, in 1973. Sabretooth's fate in the X-Men Universe is left unexplained, which is disappointing, because I thought he was good. (They announced he might appear in Logan which would've been amazing but he never did.:() Anybody is welcome to respond to me but please. This is an opinion, so either read and leave it or debate it. Have at it.

Edited by Captains Domon
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Let's do another one. How about.....hmmmm, well, since I did X-Men Origins, let's do The Wolverine! I'll do one for Logan as well.

I have mixed feelings about The Wolverine. While it is an immense improvement from X-Men Origins, this film felt lacking in a lot of things. First of all, this movie has a ton of bad actors in it. From the young actor who played Yashida(the man obsessed with stealing Logan's healing factor) to Mariko Yashida(gag me), there is a lot of bad performances in this movie. Though the performances of Hugh Jackman and Famke Janssen were good as ever. Also, there is like 6% character development in this film. I wish the movie would've delved deeper into the Yashida family, especially Shingen(the stereotypical abusive, stern, slash-and-hack Japanese father) who was a stereotypical abusive, stern, slash-and-hack Japanese father. My other big problem was that the way they inhibited Logan's healing factor in this one was stupid. FOX, WHAT ARE YOU DOING!!??? YOU SHOULD BE SHOWING HOW POWERFUL LOGAN'S HEALING SHOULD BE, BUT INSTEAD YOU'RE LIKE, "OH, GEE, LET'S MAKE HUGH GET HURT MORE AND HAVE PEOPLE WORRY ABOUT HIM, WHEN WE SHOULD BE SHOWING THE ACTUAL HEALING TO REMEDY YET ANOTHER MISTAKE WE PUT IN X-MEN ORIGINS(that being they didn't utilize Logan's healing factor enough)THAT'LL BE FUN FOR EVERYONE!! YEAH!!" MORE LIKE NOT!!!!! LOGAN CAN HEAL WOUNDS FOR A REASON!!! USE IT!!! 

And now, the Silver Samurai. TWENTIETH CENTURY FOX!!!! ARE YOU TRYING TO KILL THE X-MEN UNIVERSE?? THE SILVER SAMURAI IS A FREAKING BEAST, USING ENERGY TO POWER HIS SWORD, AND THEN YOU GUYS WERE LIKE, "OH, HEY LET'S MAKE ONE OF THE BEST JAPANESE MARVEL VILLAINS A STUPID GIANT ROBOT CONTROLLED BY AN OLD MAN WHO SHOULD REALLY BE LOCKED UP IN A SOVIET MENTAL ASYLUM!! EVERYONE WILL LOVE THAT!!" NOOOOO!! NO, I SAY! I WILL NOT STAND FOR THIS! YOU STUPID HOLLYWOOD EXECUTIVE HAVE RUINED THE MR. LOGAN GOES TO TOKYO STORYLINE!!!!!

Despite these appalling problems, I really enjoyed seeing Logan living out in the Yukon wilderness like Sasquatch. It kind of showed more of Logan's animal side. The dreams that Logan has about Jean Grey were also cool to see. Finally, my favorite part of the movie was probably the post-credits scene. (Which says a lot about my view of the movie.) Seeing Ian and Patrick come up to Hugh and saying, "Wanna erase the terrible conclusion of our last adventure?" then Hugh just goes, *grunt*. was pretty fun. 

That's my opinion of The Wolverine. Feel free to comment.

Edited by Captains Domon
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Dishonored is great! Great plot, great missions! Also, the DLC is excellent.

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2 minutes ago, Straw said:

Dishonored is great!

I actually really liked the cutscenes. They made the gameplay more intrguing, and the game more fun over all.

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Bayle here. I'm going to review a very controversial superhero movie. Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice. A lot of people have said they love this movie. A lot hate it. But here are my thoughts.

I was quite disappointed in Superman. The character they made in Man of Steel was replaced by a bland, flat character who mopes around and plays in the tub. In this universe, he seems to be ignorant of the lives he ruins, and that really bothers me. They tried to make him feel guilt in the movie, but it didn't work at all. Another thing that confuses people was their version of Doomsday. If you guys have ever read DC Comics, Kryptonians can unleash a burst of energy quite like an atom bomb.(@Quiver, correct me if I'm wrong) But Doomsday has so much energy that he has to release it frequently, in order to not explode. Doomsday worked for me, but I would've preferred one closer to the comics. I think Lex Luthor was great. He was no Gene Hackman, but Jesse Eisenberg put a new, interesting twist into the character that I really liked.

Batman is a whole different story. I loved him. Christian Bale's Batman stuck to "real-world" situations, suffering losses and struggling. Ben Affleck's Batman is a veteran. He knows the drill. He has suffered and fought countless villains. But he has learned to do what is necessary, just exactly what Bale couldn't do. Some people have complained about Batman using a gun, or outright killing people. Everyone, go look at Michael Keaton's Batman. He kills a lot of people. Alfred was pretty funny as well. He has more sass than Michael Caine, and isn't afraid to talk back.

Wonder Woman was a fine addition as well. She's already out there, doing what she can to stop evil. I can't wait for her solo movie to debut. But this movie did concern me. I feel that the DCEU is rushing into this. They've already killed Superman, they've introduced the Justice League, and Superman is returning in the Justice League movie. To truly enjoy the DC universe, you must put Marvel aside and take DC as it is. Then these movies are pretty decent so far. If anyone feels like this is lacking, please comment.

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11 hours ago, Captains Domon said:

If you guys have ever read DC Comics, Kryptonians can unleash a burst of energy quite like an atom bomb.(@Quiver, correct me if I'm wrong)

You mean the solar flare, right?

So far as I know -which isn't enough, my user name really ought to be Jon Snow- that's a fairly new move, so I'm cautious about adding it to the canon of Superman's powers; the fact that we've only seen New 52 Supes use it once, and it hasn't been seen since, does a good job of suggesting it might not be a permanent addition to his powerset.

(As a comparision... the fact that Spider-Man, for a while, had stingers isn't generally considered one of his "iconic powers", and has kind of been quietly forgotten about)

On the other hand, the solar flare made it's way into the Supergirl show, and Kryptonians can burn their powers out under specific circumstances; Clark lost his for a year after the Infinite Crisis, and that says nothing of the effects of Kryptonite. So... DC Canon can be weird. Shocking, I know :P

Anyhow. Entertainment rambles after work; I have a few topics in mind I've been wanting to talk about for a while. The kind of stuff I'd ordinarily post in the Random stuff thread, but... :ph34r:

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Rodel here. Today, I'm going to finish the Wolverine trilogy up with Logan. This one will be a little weird, because I've only seen it edited.(I'm not of legal age yet.) But I'll do my best. (SPOILER WARNING!!) SFX: Way Down We Go by Kaleo(Trailer Music)

Logan is a different movie. It's almost a different reality. In here, the titular character is world-weary, has chronic pain, and literally dying, slowly and surely by the very thing that was supposed to help him(ish). It's a better future than Days of Future Past, being clear, but having all the X-Men dead isn't. Logan's just living his days hustling for drugs and cutting arms off. (And quite a bit of cussing.) The movie has a great story, and an even better one when you watch X-Men: Apocalypse before it, because it just connects so well with this movie. The characters are intriguing in a way that you love them whether or not they're bad.

Logan, the title character, is a very different person now. Even though he takes care of Xavier and works as a chauffeur, he is even reluctant to escort Laura to Eden, because he's just tired. But as he goes along this journey, he finally realizes that not everything has to be about himself. It's actually quite surprising how selfish he has been in past movies, such as refusing Charles and Erik in First Class or stopping Yashida just to save Mariko in The Wolverine. One could argue that he agreed to go back in time to save himself, not caring about who or what else was saved. But the fact that Laura was his daughter and Xavier's death(spoiler) happened, pushed him into reality. He begins to do things for other people, and recognizes the ramifications of his mistakes. (Xavier and the Munsons.) So by the time we see Logan die(spoiler), it's truly a beautiful death.

Xavier is very different too. He's a hundred years old and suffers from Alzheimer's disease, which makes his psychic attacks deadly, as he can't control them. In 2029, he's probably the most dangerous mutant alive. During the hunt, Xavier's mind manages to stay relatively clear. I really liked the way his relationship with Logan was at the beginning of the movie. When he dies, he remembers a psychic attack he had that killed most of the X-Men (spoiler) and laments to Logan (actually X-24). It is a tender and heartfelt good-bye to our Professor X, but a necessary one to push Logan's character in the right direction.

I loved Laura. Dafne Keen was incredible. Having her not speak for nearly most of the movie was a stroke of mastery on Fox's part. She helped Logan see that mutants could still survive. After that, I really don't have much to say. It was just fun to see how the dynamics of Logan and Laura's relationship went.

The other characters were pretty decent, especially Caliban. Besides Logan, I would say my favorite character was Caliban. Most of his development happens before the movie's events. He aids the Essex company with finding mutants, and realizes his mistake. Going into hiding, he helps Logan take care of Xavier. Throughout the film, you can feel the guilt he has, and the determination to do better. I really liked his drive. When the Reavers find Logan, Caliban sacrifices himself(spoiler) so that Logan and Laura can escape. Donald Pierce was a whole different kettle of fish. The erratic moods we see in him make him a spectacular opponent for Logan. He has no mercy, no sympathy, and a sarcastic view of life and death. Zander Rice, though, didn't work for me. He was the mind behind the scheme, but to base the whole thing on just his father's death is kind of rocky for me.

Concluding, Logan is definitely the best film in the X-Men Universe, perhaps the best that ever will be. It is Marvel's The Dark Knight. It is a work of art. I thoroughly enjoyed every single minute and look forward to seeing it again.

Edited by Captains Domon
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 As a young kid, I loved Harry Potter. It still holds a special place in my heart, but has weakened as of late because of one thing. The Cursed Child. This pathetic excuse of an "eighth book" was only made to please fans, but it failed to do even that! Here are my thoughts.

One thing I was perpetually disappointed in was Ron. In the actual books, Ron is an idiot but slowly grows up and develops. In Cursed Child, HE'S BACK TO BEING AN IDIOT!!!! WHAT HAVE YOU DONE, ROWLING?? RON BECAME A BELOVED CHARACTER, BUT NOW YOU'VE MADE HIM THE CRAZY UNCLE WHO PULLS THEIR NIECE'S NOSE OFF!! AND LET ME ASK YOU, WHAT HAPPENED TO GEORGE?? HE SHOULD BE IN CHARGE OF WEASLEY WIZARD WHEEZES, NOT RONALD!! DID HE DIE OF AN EAR INFECTION? DID HE?? DID HE?? YOU MADE SO MANY PLOT HOLES!!!

Another thing I was mad about was Hermione. Not because they cast a black woman, however. (People are allowed to interpret the character any way they like, but in my mind, I've always seen Hermione as an Emma Watson type.) It is because they FREAKING MADE HER THE FREAKING MINISTER OF MAGIC!!! NOBODY, AND I MEAN NOBODY, BECOMES THE HEAD OF THE WIZARD COMMUNITY THAT QUICKLY. I WAS UNDER THE IMPRESSION THAT KINGSLEY SHACKLEBOLT WAS THE MINISTER, NOT HERMIONE!! MAYBE LATER IN LIFE, BUT NOT RIGHT NOW! Also, in one of the parallel dimensions, it appears that Hermione and Draco Malfoy are becoming a "hot ticket" UHHHHH, GAG!!! ARE YOU DETERMINED TO KILL HARRY POTTER?? THAT IS NOT COOL, J.K.!!!

The characters of Albus and Scorpius was....odd. I didn't have a huge problem with it, but they made it feel awkward. Albus does have the temperament and attitude that defines his sexuality, but it's just weird. (I personally don't approve of this, but again, interpretations are a thing.) One of the most confusing things was the time jumps and the parallel dimension stuff. I couldn't follow any of it at times, and it just made the book (or play or whatever) a lot worse.

And finally, the biggest problem in the book. You all knew this was coming, and I have the right to smack this down, because it destroys Harry Potter continuity as we know it. This blemish is......THE TROLLEY WITCH!!! DUH!!!! J.K. ROWLING, I RESPECT YOU, BUT THIS MISTAKE ALMOST MADE THAT RESPECT FLY OFF THE CLIFFS OF INSANITY!!!!! WHAT IN THE THUNDERBIRD WERE YOU THINKING!!?? THE FREAKING TROLLEY WITCH IS A REAL PERSON!! SHE'S NOT "THE SENTINEL OF THE TRAIN"!!! SHE DOES NOT HAVE PUMPKIN PASTY GRENADES!! AND SHE DOES NOT HAVE A FREAKING SPIKED MACE FOR AN ARM!!! IF SHE ACTUALLY WAS THE SUPPOSED "GUARD", THEN WHERE WAS SHE WHEN THE DEMENTORS CAME ON BOARD?? WHERE WAS SHE WHEN HARRY AND RON FLEW A CAR OVER THE TRAIN?? SHE WASN'T THERE TO HELP HARRY WHEN HE GOT PWNED BY MALFOY! SHE WASN"T THERE WHEN THEY TOOK LUNA!! I WILL NOT STAND FOR THIS!!! I WILL NOT!!! HARRY POTTER AND THE CURSED CHILD HAS EARNED ITS PLACE AT MY BOOK BURNING!!!

To sum things up, if I didn't make it quite clear, I thought that The Cursed Child was the worst piece of fan fiction I've ever read. And it was written by the author! Anyone is welcome to challenge me. Go on. I dare you.

Edited by Captains Domon
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Rodel here. Today, I am reviewing Doctor Who. Let's begin.

Doctor Who focuses on an alien called the Doctor who(ha, ha, wasn't intended) travels through time in a police box. Occasionally, he will travel with a companion. When I first heard of Doctor Who, it was mainly because of the Google doodle that came out to celebrate its 50th anniversary. Here it is. I felt confused so I asked my dad. He hadn't watched it either, but he suggested we watch it. And we did. We started with Christopher Eccleston's Doctor. It was rough. I was actually kind of terrified for the first few episodes. But as time went on, I got used to it. Then enter left: David Tennant. Wow. At the point when David Tennant became the Doctor, I began watching an episode everyday. He was quirky and funny, and I loved it. In present time, I have seen at least three episodes of each classic Doctor, so I could get into the feel of them. There's no Doctor that doesn't work for me. I love the different attitudes, even if the Sixth Doctor tried to strangle his companion.

Companions are different. Some are useful, some are annoying, some are awesome. But there are some I really hate. First, Adam Mitchell. Anyone who's watched New Who should know who this is, and I shouldn't have to explain. Another is Martha. She always moped about how the Doctor didn't love her, and she wasn't that useful. Peri Brown from the classic series is not very entertaining either.

Captain Jack Harkness. Don't worry, I'm not hating on him. Seeing him act in a different way then other people was cool. The Ninth Doctor was fine with it, the Tenth Doctor was annoyed by his antics. I just feel they made it awkward at times. I'm not hitting on homosexual things, I think that it was just rocky. River Song was done much better. (In case you didn't know, she is bisexual) Hints are dropped to what kind of a person River is, and I feel it was much more smooth than Jack.

Doctor Who is one of those shows that I will show my kids. It has earned its keep in the greatest sci-fi classics.

 

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Rodel here. Today, I'm going to review the Hobbit trilogy. ..............This is going to be fun. Let's begin.

The first mistake is that they split one, easy to read, children's book into THREE!!! PETER JACKSON, WHAT ON MIDDLE-EARTH MADE YOU DO THIS??!! THE LAST MOVIE IS LITERALLY FIVE PAGES LONG IN THE BOOK. YOU'VE JUST BECOME A MONEY MILKER HAVEN'T YOU? Second, there are so many continuity issues that I can't forgive, because they practically butchered the book anyway. First off, Azog is supposed to be DEAD!! BOLG IS THE ORC THAT ATTACKS, AND HE DOESN'T EVEN DO THAT UNTIL THE FIVE PAGES!!! They also made the dwarves younger looking than I thought they would. The only one who looks his age is Balin. I was also mad about how they used Radagast, who should have been in the Lord of the Rings to begin with, but I guess they're just using one of the most powerful beings on Middle-Earth as COMIC RELIEF!!! YEAH, I GUESS THAT WILL BE FINE WITH EVERYONE! THINK AGAIN, CARROT MAN!!

Now I thought that Tauriel was......wait......who's Tauriel? Oh, that's right. TAURIEL DOESN'T EXIST!!!!! THEY MADE UP A CHARACTER IN ONE OF THE GREATEST FANTASY EPICS WE'VE EVER KNOWN, AND THEY'RE SUPPOSED TO THINK EVERYONE'S HAPPY??? NO!!! YOU GUYS MADE HER FALL IN LOVE WITH A DWARF!!! A FREAKING DWARF!!! ELVES AND DWARVES HATE EACH OTHER!! THE ONLY EXCEPTION TO THE RULE IS GIMLI AND, OH YEAH, LEGOLAS!! LEGOLAS HAD A WAY BIGGER PART THAN I EVER THOUGHT HE WOULD. I THOUGHT HE WOULD JUST POP OUT IN THE FOREST AND THEN DURING THE BATTLE, BUT NOPE. ALL THE GIRLS JUST HAD TO SEE ORLANDO BLOOM DEFY THE LAWS OF PHYSICS!!

The CGI was terrible. In Lord of the RIngs, they hardly use it, relying more on natural sets and cool makeup. But in the Hobbit, they made everything CGI. The goblins, the orcs, the wolves, the spiders, the Battle of the Five Armies, the sets, and the dragon. It's just too much. I like the makeup better. One thing that I did like, however, was Sherlock and Watson facing off against each other. No matter what anybody says, they did that on purpose. They totally did.

That's my view of the fanfic trilogy. Keep it secret. Keep it safe.

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I did not like the new Star Wars trailer.

Please. Allow me to explain.

I just don't feel it was necessary. While The Force Awakens trailers were pretty good, this one felt lacking for some reason. It had nice clips, like Kylo Ren, Rey, and Luke, but felt the only part of the trailer that made me feel excited was when those speeders were racing across the sand. It also showed Finn mostly dead, and that's fine because I actually didn't like Finn as a character in Episode VII. 

My overall opinion is that releasing the trailer was pointless and that they should just leave it shrouded in mystery until December 17. That would be fun. (Also, I'm afraid that we're just going to see a carbon copy of Empire Strikes Back.)

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I had a Jurassic Park marathon over the weekend. So I'll review all four movies here today. SFX: Welcome to Jurassic Park!

The first movie, Jurassic Park, is a great movie. I loved the effects, the characters, the suspense, and the music! Oh, the music! Hopefully you checked out the SFX. One thing I loved was, of course, all the classic quotes that spawned out of that film. Like, "Hold onto your butts." My favorite characters were Robert Muldoon, the gamekeeper, and Ian Malcolm, duh. I loved the way they managed to make the suspense real. There was only one character I didn't like and that was Lex.

If the first movie was the main course, then The Lost World: Jurassic Park is the flat root beer your uncle gives you. There are great parts in this movie, but there are also completely stupid parts as well. There is one great character, and that is Ian Malcolm, but even saying that is a stretch. The characters in this movie are so flat and one-sided that the entire feel of the movie was ruined. One thing I liked, though, was the action. (Also, what's up with the San Diego sequence? Why does it feel like a completely different movie?)

The first thing you realize when you pop Jurassic Park III into the DVD player is that you make some pretty poor life choices. Everyone loves to hate on this movie, but by the time I watched it, it actually wasn't bad. There are pretty great characters in the movie (except the kid) and it actually does a good job of creating suspense. The part I really despised, however, was the ending. UHHHHH, WHAT???!!! WHERE DID THEY COME FROM?? ELLIE DOES NOT HAVE ACCESS TO DO THAT, AND EVEN IF SHE DID, THEY COULD NOT GET THERE THAT QUICKLY!!! THEY HAVE TO GET PERMISSION FROM THE COSTA RICAN GOVERNMENT!!! But it was an okay movie. (But saying that takes effort)

Jurassic World is a great improvement. It has many callbacks to the first installment, but has enough new things in it to stand on its own, so it doesn't feel like a glorified reboot, unlike some movies.....*cough* Force Awakens *cough*. It doesn't have memorable quotes, but has great characters, cool action, and amazing suspense. I was actually terrified when the Pteradons got loose! It has a great ending, and thoroughly cannot wait for the sequel.

That's my opinion. Enjoy.

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On 4/25/2017 at 2:02 PM, Captains Domon said:

To sum things up, if I didn't make it quite clear, I thought that The Cursed Child was the worst piece of fan fiction I've ever read. And it was written by the author! Anyone is welcome to challenge me. Go on. I dare you.

Did J.K. Rowling write it? I was under the impression that she was more of a supervisor. But even that's still pretty bad that such a result came about.

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If you don't mind, I would like to vent a particular thorn in my side: Avatar the Last Airbender (read: the movie)

As a devoted fan of the original series, this full film remake was an utter catastrophe, like the Ember Island Players had come to the real world but without Sokka's help and their stage effects. IT. WAS. BRUTAL. Now I would like to say that I'm not a biased person, so I'll try to explain in from the viewpoint of someone who has not seen the original series. Basically, you have this kid, who acts like he's old but really can't pull it off. He's off to save the world through a campaign against the enemy, and ends up in the North where he staves off a whole bunch of lizard riding masked men. Oh yeah, he has some siblings to help, one who can move water and the other who's basically there for a less-than-a-week relationship with a princess who turns into the moon. Some of these people can move dust, others can move torches. Still others can catch fish and melt ice. Yep, those are your special power options.

I was disappointed. The lines were cheesy, the graphics were cheesy, and the chemistry between EVERYONE was cheesy! It literally hurt my soul to watch. On a tone of the bending, from the POVs of both fans and non fans, seriously, how long does it take you to move some Earth or produce fire? Those Earthbenders were extremely disappointing; a bunch of uncoordinated grunts and lunges and all that happens is: Ta Da! A wall of dirt! Yay! And the Firebenders! Point: they do not need to be next to a source of fire to bend fire. That would've seriously restricted their movements in the original series. Get it right M. Night Shyamalan. Oh actually, don't try, it would probably be another fail. 

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On 4/27/2017 at 8:21 AM, Captains Domon said:

Second, there are so many continuity issues that I can't forgive, because they practically butchered the book anyway. First off, Azog is supposed to be DEAD!! BOLG IS THE ORC THAT ATTACKS, AND HE DOESN'T EVEN DO THAT UNTIL THE FIVE PAGES!!!

THANK YOU!!!! Thank you for noticing that! That bothers me so much! 

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STOP!!! I'd like to review one of the worst movies ever for a second. Superman IV: The Quest for Peace.

The 30th anniversary of this movie is coming up, and since I've been on a Superman binge, I'll give my thoughts.

The only good thing about this movie is that it is fun to watch with a bunch of friends. We all start pointing out and making fun of the mistakes and sins of this movie. Whatever you think of when you see this movie, you're absolutely right. The story and script is total cringe all the way through, the special effects could have been made in my basement, and the acting is terrible. If you thought Superman III was horrifying, wait till you see this sucker. It obvious this movie was made to milk out some more money, but it miserably failed to do even that. The first and foremost thing I hated about this pathetic excuse of a film was NUCLEAR MAN!! Oh, yes, let's just take this totally not made up character in Superman lore and throw him in the movie! He's basically a lame Sabretooth/Negasonic Teenage Warhead mashup that can fly. The premise was so, so very stupid as well. Taking all the nuclear missiles in the world and throwing them into the sun? Yup. Totally makes sense. It totally wouldn't give Lex Luthor the upper hand as all the countries buy kryptonite from him to retaliate. Yup, that makes perfect sense.

Who approved this movie in the first place? The special effects are so disgusting to look at. Superman can't rebuild the Great Wall of China with his x-ray vision!! He doesn't fall to a scratch from Nuclear Man's plastic claws! It's just so...no, no, I can't do this anymore! I CAN'T TALK ABOUT THIS MONSTROSITY ANY LONGER!!!

In conclusion, this is probably the worst movie I've seen, besides Supergirl and the movies they show on Mystery Science Theater 3000.

 

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19 hours ago, ryshadium90 said:

If you don't mind, I would like to vent a particular thorn in my side: Avatar the Last Airbender (read: the movie)

As a devoted fan of the original series, this full film remake was an utter catastrophe, like the Ember Island Players had come to the real world but without Sokka's help and their stage effects. IT. WAS. BRUTAL. Now I would like to say that I'm not a biased person, so I'll try to explain in from the viewpoint of someone who has not seen the original series. Basically, you have this kid, who acts like he's old but really can't pull it off. He's off to save the world through a campaign against the enemy, and ends up in the North where he staves off a whole bunch of lizard riding masked men. Oh yeah, he has some siblings to help, one who can move water and the other who's basically there for a less-than-a-week relationship with a princess who turns into the moon. Some of these people can move dust, others can move torches. Still others can catch fish and melt ice. Yep, those are your special power options.

I was disappointed. The lines were cheesy, the graphics were cheesy, and the chemistry between EVERYONE was cheesy! It literally hurt my soul to watch. On a tone of the bending, from the POVs of both fans and non fans, seriously, how long does it take you to move some Earth or produce fire? Those Earthbenders were extremely disappointing; a bunch of uncoordinated grunts and lunges and all that happens is: Ta Da! A wall of dirt! Yay! And the Firebenders! Point: they do not need to be next to a source of fire to bend fire. That would've seriously restricted their movements in the original series. Get it right M. Night Shyamalan. Oh actually, don't try, it would probably be another fail. 

I know this is crazy, but I'd like to defend the Last Airbender movie:

Spoiler

I'd really like to.

 

Edited by Retsam
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2 hours ago, Retsam said:

I know this is crazy, but I'd like to defend the Last Airbender movie:

Go ahead! I really don't want to down anyone. That was just my extreme bias. I've heard of lots of people who actually like it, and it's not like I'm going to go all chasmfiend on them.

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Sorry, that was an attempt at humor that apparently swung and missed.  I'd really like to defend the Last Airbender movie, because I'd really like it to be worth defending.  (But it's not, so I can't)

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Heh. Sorry. I'm super bad at picking up humor on a computer chat.  But attempt appreciated!

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1 hour ago, Who Sharded? said:

Jack and Jill is a below average movie.

What is that movie?

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On 5/8/2017 at 8:53 AM, ryshadium90 said:

Did J.K. Rowling write it? I was under the impression that she was more of a supervisor. But even that's still pretty bad that such a result came about.

She didn't write it; she just licensed her characters out to Jack Thorne, who wrote the script. But she did heartily endorse it and promote the storms out of it for at least two months prior to opening night, as well as being involved with the play as a sort of supervisory consultant (my impression anyway). So even if she didn't write it, she would have been well aware of its flaws and plot holes. 

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Okay, minor thing I want to comment on regarding Samurai Jack, season 5. Spoilers for episode 7.

So... I get the motif they were going for; Jack finds balance and is returned to his "normal" state. And that's cool. I just don't agree with how they executed it.

For one thing, the "Mad Jack" iteration claimed that he was the reason Jack survived so long. Except, in all the episodes to this point, Jack was haunted by and rejected that spirit's advice. Mad Jack said he wanted things "to end," but Jack didn't stop fighting. If "Mad Jack" was trying to lure Jack down the path of being more brutal, more pragmatic, and more willing to compromise his ideals, that wasn't really how it came across to me.

More than that... Mad Jack looked like Jack. So, when Jack attained balance within himself... he resembles Mad Jack? Shouldn't he have hit a mid point between who he used to be and who he had become; the samurai outfit, the sword, but keeping the beard, maybe a bit more neatly trimmed and regal? I dunno, I'm just not sure how the end result of episode 7 is him achieving the balance he was told to seek.

Still a good show I recommend everyone watch, though :ph34r:

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Hello! It's Rodel! Time for another epic post. I'm going to review one of the greatest adventure franchises of all time. Indiana Jones. SFX: Theme Song you Play when you run on a Hike

The first movie is Raiders of the Lost Ark. I love the way this movie has made a permanent impact on pop culture. It has great action sequences, terrific characters, and the best opening ten minutes you'll ever find in a movie. It is also surprising (and funny) how many mistakes made the final cut in the film. There are so many mistakes, but WHO CARES??!! THIS MOVIE IS FREAKING AMAZING!! This one actually disturbs me more than Temple of Doom did. There are many violent parts, it is almost shocking. But this movie is a classic that deserved Best Picture at the Oscars. (However, I'm not complaining about Chariots of Fire. That movie was great.)

The Temple of Doom is wildly different from its predecessor. It is a prequel and takes place in India. Indy and his friends face off against the Thuggee cult......... This is my favorite Indiana Jones movie. Everyone loves to bash on this one, including Steven Spielberg, but I love the way this film is executed. It is darker, but like Raiders it has a deep message that you perceive more and more you watch it. This is the most violent of the movies though, so that may scare away some people. (It did create the PG-13 rating) But this movie has earned my appreciation.

Unlike Temple of Doom, everyone loves to heap praises on this third movie, The Last Crusade. The Nazis return as the villains in this one, but they actually don't feel as menacing as they did in Raiders. Nonetheless, this movie always kicks into my nonstalgia, seeing the great characters and memorable action. And the ending just makes you feel like it is the end. (It's not) But the morals in this film are great ones to be acknowledged. I don't really have much more to say on this one. It's a great movie.

Pressurized by fans and because they "wanted" to, Steven Spielberg and George Lucas made the worst mistake of their lives. (In George's case, it was the second worse) They made Kingdom of the Crystal Skull. Everyone is right. This movie is an embarrassment. The CGI is terrible, the Russians are stupid villains, Harrison and Karen are wasted, and the thought of Shia LaBeouf taking over as the greatest action hero is horrifying. Despite all the negative reaction, there were some things I liked. The story is great and sound, (UNTIL THE STUPID ALIEN SHOWED UP!!) seeing Indiana was awesome, and the opening sequence is probably my favorite part of the film. (Except the refrigerator) I actually liked the ending with the marriage too. Shia picks up the hat and Harrison is like, "Screw YOU, kid! I ain't done yet." Then they leave.

It is not the end. A fifth(and probably final) Indiana Jones film is scheduled for release in 2020. Harrison Ford, Steven Spielberg, and John Williams are all returning, and hopefully will give us a fitting end for the greatest hero of all time. This franchise will always live on, and I'm going to show it to everyone I meet.

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