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Having a Bad Day?: Get 'yer Hugs here!!


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Hi.

New in this thread, but I definitely need to get 'ma hugs.

I've had... a ROUGH time lately. I'm constantly stressed and overwhelmed even when I have no homework or tests or show choir competitions or friend issues.

I sprained my ankle late August last year (the 29th) and I'm still having issues; saw four different doctors, three physical therapists, got a ton of x-rays and MRIs... nothing. But somehow it still manages to feel like there's a thorny dagger stuck in my ankle/foot/shin region. This has caused me to have to sit out of show choir rehearsal a LOT. I was sitting out all of show choir again today (as in sitting out the whole time, hadn't danced AT ALL) and I heard someone say my name, so I looked up, thinking it was one of my friends come to check on me. Turns out it was Annabelle's little brother who said, "Hey, your dancing's been awesome today!" He meant it as a joke, but I still nearly cried. I managed to force a smile and then I went back to drawing on my music.

I get home at night sometimes and I just fall apart. There are spells where I can't handle any social interaction, and I get frustrated at people when they try to talk to me. Some days I get messages and I open them and stare at them and then even though I love the person who sent it to me, I turn off my phone and just... don't respond. I don't know. I've just been struggling a lot.

There's more but this is already a plenty long rant ;P

Hewp. 

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43 minutes ago, Kajsa :) said:

Hi.

New in this thread, but I definitely need to get 'ma hugs.

I've had... a ROUGH time lately. I'm constantly stressed and overwhelmed even when I have no homework or tests or show choir competitions or friend issues.

I sprained my ankle late August last year (the 29th) and I'm still having issues; saw four different doctors, three physical therapists, got a ton of x-rays and MRIs... nothing. But somehow it still manages to feel like there's a thorny dagger stuck in my ankle/foot/shin region. This has caused me to have to sit out of show choir rehearsal a LOT. I was sitting out all of show choir again today (as in sitting out the whole time, hadn't danced AT ALL) and I heard someone say my name, so I looked up, thinking it was one of my friends come to check on me. Turns out it was Annabelle's little brother who said, "Hey, your dancing's been awesome today!" He meant it as a joke, but I still nearly cried. I managed to force a smile and then I went back to drawing on my music.

I get home at night sometimes and I just fall apart. There are spells where I can't handle any social interaction, and I get frustrated at people when they try to talk to me. Some days I get messages and I open them and stare at them and then even though I love the person who sent it to me, I turn off my phone and just... don't respond. I don't know. I've just been struggling a lot.

There's more but this is already a plenty long rant ;P

Hewp. 

*Hugs*

That sounds terrible, I only know what a few of those things feel like. But to have them all together must be really rough. I can't know all of your pain, but I am here to let you know that you aren't alone.

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10 hours ago, Kajsa :) said:

Hi.

New in this thread, but I definitely need to get 'ma hugs.

I've had... a ROUGH time lately. I'm constantly stressed and overwhelmed even when I have no homework or tests or show choir competitions or friend issues.

I sprained my ankle late August last year (the 29th) and I'm still having issues; saw four different doctors, three physical therapists, got a ton of x-rays and MRIs... nothing. But somehow it still manages to feel like there's a thorny dagger stuck in my ankle/foot/shin region. This has caused me to have to sit out of show choir rehearsal a LOT. I was sitting out all of show choir again today (as in sitting out the whole time, hadn't danced AT ALL) and I heard someone say my name, so I looked up, thinking it was one of my friends come to check on me. Turns out it was Annabelle's little brother who said, "Hey, your dancing's been awesome today!" He meant it as a joke, but I still nearly cried. I managed to force a smile and then I went back to drawing on my music.

I get home at night sometimes and I just fall apart. There are spells where I can't handle any social interaction, and I get frustrated at people when they try to talk to me. Some days I get messages and I open them and stare at them and then even though I love the person who sent it to me, I turn off my phone and just... don't respond. I don't know. I've just been struggling a lot.

There's more but this is already a plenty long rant ;P

Hewp. 

*hugs*

That sounds really difficult and frustrating. I don't feel qualified to give any advice, but I hope you get though it okay. Wish you all the best.

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17 hours ago, Kajsa :) said:

Hi.

New in this thread, but I definitely need to get 'ma hugs.

I've had... a ROUGH time lately. I'm constantly stressed and overwhelmed even when I have no homework or tests or show choir competitions or friend issues.

I sprained my ankle late August last year (the 29th) and I'm still having issues; saw four different doctors, three physical therapists, got a ton of x-rays and MRIs... nothing. But somehow it still manages to feel like there's a thorny dagger stuck in my ankle/foot/shin region. This has caused me to have to sit out of show choir rehearsal a LOT. I was sitting out all of show choir again today (as in sitting out the whole time, hadn't danced AT ALL) and I heard someone say my name, so I looked up, thinking it was one of my friends come to check on me. Turns out it was Annabelle's little brother who said, "Hey, your dancing's been awesome today!" He meant it as a joke, but I still nearly cried. I managed to force a smile and then I went back to drawing on my music.

I get home at night sometimes and I just fall apart. There are spells where I can't handle any social interaction, and I get frustrated at people when they try to talk to me. Some days I get messages and I open them and stare at them and then even though I love the person who sent it to me, I turn off my phone and just... don't respond. I don't know. I've just been struggling a lot.

There's more but this is already a plenty long rant ;P

Hewp. 

I know I'm late, but that's terrible. I'm sorry things are going so rough, especially since there's nothing to do about it. Everyone has those days, and you don't need to feel bad for struggling with it. Keep trying! You're awesome.

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4 hours ago, Aes Sedai said:

I know I'm late, but that's terrible. I'm sorry things are going so rough, especially since there's nothing to do about it. Everyone has those days, and you don't need to feel bad for struggling with it. Keep trying! You're awesome.

Thank you <333

You guys are so kind :) 

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21 minutes ago, That1Cellist said:

I am paranoid.

I really want people to make sense. I want to understand. I want to know what to say and do. I don't.

I'm scared.

I don't even know anymore.

And the language fails me.

I don't know really how to act around large groups of people. If I don't know a person, I am uncomfortable around them til I get to know them. 

People are spontaneous and weird and hardly seem to make sense. I don't know how to really act around people. I find myself molding to the group if it is a group of friends or I don't and I feel left out and alone.

I don't quite know how to describe it either Cellist, but I know the feeling that you are trying to describe. And it is hard to describe and to deal with. Hard to live with always feeling alone when not with family or friends.

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1 hour ago, The Wandering Wizard said:

I don't know really how to act around large groups of people. If I don't know a person, I am uncomfortable around them til I get to know them. 

People are spontaneous and weird and hardly seem to make sense. I don't know how to really act around people. I find myself molding to the group if it is a group of friends or I don't and I feel left out and alone.

I don't quite know how to describe it either Cellist, but I know the feeling that you are trying to describe. And it is hard to describe and to deal with. Hard to live with always feeling alone when not with family or friends.

A bit of a tangent: Yup, and when you don't know how to make friends and other people talk to you, but then you realize they have a much larger friend group beyond you and very close friendships. Mind you I really appreciate them, but it's hard to fit into large groups once you are introduced to them, and I don't know how to make close friends with people, especially in high school :/. Frankly the only person I can talk to ends up being the person who introduced me to their friend group. Anyhow just thought I'd share my greif over high school friendships lel

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23 hours ago, That1Cellist said:

I am paranoid.

I really want people to make sense. I want to understand. I want to know what to say and do. I don't.

I'm scared.

I don't even know anymore.

And the language fails me.

Sometimes I think people are just comfortable in their social circles, and sometimes I wrongly think that they’re new and somehow became part of that group. I’m clueless too. 

But people usually give you benefit of the doubt. I do, but I don’t know, because people are hard, except for the ones I talk to. 

*hugs*

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So on Friday at lunch I was sitting with my friends and they started talking about religion and forgot I was there. None of them are religious. In fact most of them are entirely against religion. So they're talking about religion mainly about how much they hate it and they go so far as to say things like ''is not even a you do you and I'll do what I want, its none of them should get to be religious" and "all religions are just cults". And then they remembered I was there and they tried to tell me that I wasn't a part of this group of people they were talking about. But that doesn't really work. So as much as I could on Friday and Saturday I avoided them. Now one of my friends who wasn't a part of this noticed. He happens to also be the boyfriend of one of those friends, he talked to me about what was going on and then we started talking about their relationship. She has been avoiding him because she claims to have lost feelings but he doesn't know that. He is also worried about fully committing to their relations because he says he has feelings for me too. So now I need to convince her to talk to him so they can figure this out. Which will likely end in them breaking up which means I will be busy comforting at least one of them. And I have to do all of this without yelling at any of them because they have a tendency to forget I have feelings other than happy and that its okay for me to be upset every once in a while. 

Yay. Drama.

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8 minutes ago, InfiniteInsanity said:

So on Friday at lunch I was sitting with my friends and they started talking about religion and forgot I was there. None of them are religious. In fact most of them are entirely against religion. So they're talking about religion mainly about how much they hate it and they go so far as to say things like ''is not even a you do you and I'll do what I want, its none of them should get to be religious" and "all religions are just cults". And then they remembered I was there and they tried to tell me that I wasn't a part of this group of people they were talking about. But that doesn't really work. So as much as I could on Friday and Saturday I avoided them. Now one of my friends who wasn't a part of this noticed. He happens to also be the boyfriend of one of those friends, he talked to me about what was going on and then we started talking about their relationship. She has been avoiding him because she claims to have lost feelings but he doesn't know that. He is also worried about fully committing to their relations because he says he has feelings for me too. So now I need to convince her to talk to him so they can figure this out. Which will likely end in them breaking up which means I will be busy comforting at least one of them. And I have to do all of this without yelling at any of them because they have a tendency to forget I have feelings other than happy and that its okay for me to be upset every once in a while. 

Yay. Drama.

I'm sorry.  (Sending you hugs)  I know how some of those things feel, and they suck.

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8 hours ago, InfiniteInsanity said:

So on Friday at lunch I was sitting with my friends and they started talking about religion and forgot I was there. None of them are religious. In fact most of them are entirely against religion. So they're talking about religion mainly about how much they hate it and they go so far as to say things like ''is not even a you do you and I'll do what I want, its none of them should get to be religious" and "all religions are just cults". And then they remembered I was there and they tried to tell me that I wasn't a part of this group of people they were talking about. But that doesn't really work. So as much as I could on Friday and Saturday I avoided them. Now one of my friends who wasn't a part of this noticed. He happens to also be the boyfriend of one of those friends, he talked to me about what was going on and then we started talking about their relationship. She has been avoiding him because she claims to have lost feelings but he doesn't know that. He is also worried about fully committing to their relations because he says he has feelings for me too. So now I need to convince her to talk to him so they can figure this out. Which will likely end in them breaking up which means I will be busy comforting at least one of them. And I have to do all of this without yelling at any of them because they have a tendency to forget I have feelings other than happy and that its okay for me to be upset every once in a while. 

Yay. Drama.

*Hugs* This is an unfortunate thing. Hopefully you will be able to figure this out.

Spoiler

On another note, I'm totally going to bring this up next time I need to talk about why girls are scary. Communication, people.

I mean, I guess I'm bad at talking too.

Sorry of that's insensitive.

 

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9 hours ago, InfiniteInsanity said:

So on Friday at lunch I was sitting with my friends and they started talking about religion and forgot I was there. None of them are religious. In fact most of them are entirely against religion. So they're talking about religion mainly about how much they hate it and they go so far as to say things like ''is not even a you do you and I'll do what I want, its none of them should get to be religious" and "all religions are just cults". And then they remembered I was there and they tried to tell me that I wasn't a part of this group of people they were talking about. But that doesn't really work. So as much as I could on Friday and Saturday I avoided them. Now one of my friends who wasn't a part of this noticed. He happens to also be the boyfriend of one of those friends, he talked to me about what was going on and then we started talking about their relationship. She has been avoiding him because she claims to have lost feelings but he doesn't know that. He is also worried about fully committing to their relations because he says he has feelings for me too. So now I need to convince her to talk to him so they can figure this out. Which will likely end in them breaking up which means I will be busy comforting at least one of them. And I have to do all of this without yelling at any of them because they have a tendency to forget I have feelings other than happy and that its okay for me to be upset every once in a while. 

Yay. Drama.

Humans are the best, and also the worst. I get the feeling of friends bad mouthing religion, it stinks. You got this.

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I just did a science test and it was three pages. The first two pages I think i got everything right, and then the last page had a question which I'd never seen before and I was so confused. I pretty much wrote down nonsense as my answer and I'm just sad because it was going so well and then my brain sort of crash landed right at the end.

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19 hours ago, The Sibling said:

I just did a science test and it was three pages. The first two pages I think i got everything right, and then the last page had a question which I'd never seen before and I was so confused. I pretty much wrote down nonsense as my answer and I'm just sad because it was going so well and then my brain sort of crash landed right at the end.

That’s the worst! Just remember what you did well. There’s nothing you can change now, so you don’t need to keep worrying about it; if you did good, you did good. If you fail, you fail.

*hugs* 

You’re amazing.

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  • 2 weeks later...

There's this person. They have a bad habit of manipulating people. And they had a bad habit of physically hurting people. And they got better on the second part but not on the first. And something about them my brain has just gotten so used to all the manipulating and everything that it's hard for me to recognize because I'm just used to it. But then because I'm scared I won't recognize it I just kind of shut down a little. 

This person came and sat and talked to me and couple of other people this morning before school and I couldn't take it and I just started to slowly shut down. And then when they left I just kept shutting down and I couldn't stop it which freaked me out which made me break down. 

But I've also noticed that if I can connect anything people say or do to something that person did in the past I start to shut down too. And I have no control over those connections and I don't know what to do about it. I could literally shut down at any moment because of any little thing someone did.

I want it to stop but I don't know how.

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*hugs*

Uh... I'm not exactly sure what to say here. The only thing I can think is to have a talk with the person and see if they're trying to improve on the first part. If they are, I think (I hope might be a better term) your mind will calm down a little bit. If they're not, I'd just ask them to try to improve. Sorry if that's not helpful. I don't really know what to say. 

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55 minutes ago, InfiniteInsanity said:

There's this person. They have a bad habit of manipulating people. And they had a bad habit of physically hurting people. And they got better on the second part but not on the first. And something about them my brain has just gotten so used to all the manipulating and everything that it's hard for me to recognize because I'm just used to it. But then because I'm scared I won't recognize it I just kind of shut down a little. 

This person came and sat and talked to me and couple of other people this morning before school and I couldn't take it and I just started to slowly shut down. And then when they left I just kept shutting down and I couldn't stop it which freaked me out which made me break down. 

But I've also noticed that if I can connect anything people say or do to something that person did in the past I start to shut down too. And I have no control over those connections and I don't know what to do about it. I could literally shut down at any moment because of any little thing someone did.

I want it to stop but I don't know how.

*hugs*

I'm not sure about this either. I've had my own experiences with shutting down, and sometimes it's hard to address because addressing it or talking to the person could make you shut down.

It would be a good idea to check in with this person like @Being of Cacophony said. If that's too stressful, maybe message them online or something to avoid a direct confrontation. If you can't manage either of those, try talking to someone else who you trust about it, it can really help to express it to someone and talk it through. I'm sure plenty of people, including myself, would be glad to listen on here, although it could really help to talk to someone in person.

Take care of yourself, you'll get through this.

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On 1/13/2023 at 4:59 PM, Kajsa :) said:

Hi.

New in this thread, but I definitely need to get 'ma hugs.

I've had... a ROUGH time lately. I'm constantly stressed and overwhelmed even when I have no homework or tests or show choir competitions or friend issues.

I sprained my ankle late August last year (the 29th) and I'm still having issues; saw four different doctors, three physical therapists, got a ton of x-rays and MRIs... nothing. But somehow it still manages to feel like there's a thorny dagger stuck in my ankle/foot/shin region. This has caused me to have to sit out of show choir rehearsal a LOT. I was sitting out all of show choir again today (as in sitting out the whole time, hadn't danced AT ALL) and I heard someone say my name, so I looked up, thinking it was one of my friends come to check on me. Turns out it was Annabelle's little brother who said, "Hey, your dancing's been awesome today!" He meant it as a joke, but I still nearly cried. I managed to force a smile and then I went back to drawing on my music.

I get home at night sometimes and I just fall apart. There are spells where I can't handle any social interaction, and I get frustrated at people when they try to talk to me. Some days I get messages and I open them and stare at them and then even though I love the person who sent it to me, I turn off my phone and just... don't respond. I don't know. I've just been struggling a lot.

There's more but this is already a plenty long rant ;P

Hewp. 

This is definitely a bit late, but I might be able to help at least a little bit. I didn't sprain my ankle, but I hurt my back bad, I mean really bad like a year ago. It's better, but it still hurts a lot. I used to do a lot of sports, but now, most of the time it's all I can do to stay standing. That also seriously affected my mental health, along with moving to a new school. I had a really hard time motivating myself to do anything. Hell, I still have a hard time motivating myself to do anything. It sucks. Injuries suck, people don't care, but you still get the feeling that they're watching you sit out and not do things that cause so much pain and judging you for not joining in. (well most don't care). In the end, I've found that it's worth it to stay in contact with the people you care about. It really helps to have someone to talk to who isn't judgmental. Praying also helps a lot. 

Sorry, That might have gotten a bit ranty, and I have no idea if this will actually help, but I hope I was able to do something good.

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On 1/30/2023 at 1:31 PM, InfiniteInsanity said:

There's this person. They have a bad habit of manipulating people. And they had a bad habit of physically hurting people. And they got better on the second part but not on the first. And something about them my brain has just gotten so used to all the manipulating and everything that it's hard for me to recognize because I'm just used to it. But then because I'm scared I won't recognize it I just kind of shut down a little. 

This person came and sat and talked to me and couple of other people this morning before school and I couldn't take it and I just started to slowly shut down. And then when they left I just kept shutting down and I couldn't stop it which freaked me out which made me break down. 

But I've also noticed that if I can connect anything people say or do to something that person did in the past I start to shut down too. And I have no control over those connections and I don't know what to do about it. I could literally shut down at any moment because of any little thing someone did.

I want it to stop but I don't know how.

I’m not always the best with human, but the best I can say is to try to think through the things they say. Step back and look at the situation from a distance when you aren’t with them. Imagine they’re a book character? 

That sounds really nerdy, but it’s easier to do these things when it doesn’t feel as directly related to you.

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So, you might not know this from my activity here on the shard, but I've been having a really hard time lately. Some family issues have been breathing down my back and it's really taken a toll on me. I haven't really felt like myself. It's been difficult, and I've been struggling mentally and emotionally for a very long time.

But then today, for the first time in probably a couple of months, I realized that I really felt comfortable being myself again. And it felt wonderful. It wasn't a dramatic surge of excitment or a powerful wave of joy, more like a feeling of contentment, but still! I haven't felt that in a long time. I know things won't ever be the same or even the way that I really wish that they'd be, but things will be okay. Even though my family might be falling apart, I can still be happy. 

But it's hard. And I could still use a couple of hugs

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16 minutes ago, Shining Silhouette said:

So, you might not know this from my activity here on the shard, but I've been having a really hard time lately. Some family issues have been breathing down my back and it's really taken a toll on me. I haven't really felt like myself. It's been difficult, and I've been struggling mentally and emotionally for a very long time.

But then today, for the first time in probably a couple of months, I realized that I really felt comfortable being myself again. And it felt wonderful. It wasn't a dramatic surge of excitment or a powerful wave of joy, more like a feeling of contentment, but still! I haven't felt that in a long time. I know things won't ever be the same or even the way that I really wish that they'd be, but things will be okay. Even though my family might be falling apart, I can still be happy. 

But it's hard. And I could still use a couple of hugs

As you know I am here for you, always my friend. *Hugs*

I'd give everyone I knew was having a bad time if they were all near my. My message to all of you is that you are loved. Even if you don't believe that god loves you, know that I will love you just for who you are.

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38 minutes ago, Shining Silhouette said:

So, you might not know this from my activity here on the shard, but I've been having a really hard time lately. Some family issues have been breathing down my back and it's really taken a toll on me. I haven't really felt like myself. It's been difficult, and I've been struggling mentally and emotionally for a very long time.

But then today, for the first time in probably a couple of months, I realized that I really felt comfortable being myself again. And it felt wonderful. It wasn't a dramatic surge of excitment or a powerful wave of joy, more like a feeling of contentment, but still! I haven't felt that in a long time. I know things won't ever be the same or even the way that I really wish that they'd be, but things will be okay. Even though my family might be falling apart, I can still be happy. 

But it's hard. And I could still use a couple of hugs

*hugs*

That sucks. Remember that you can always say if you're feeling down, on here and in real life, if you're comfortable with it.

I'm glad you're feeling better! Contentment is good. There's no need to expect or hope for a constant intense happiness, that's pretty unrealistic. Feeling content means stability, and stability is good.

As for the family issue, it's good that you've come to terms with the situation. You can hope that things will get better, but if they stay just okay that's fine too.

Like Wizard said, we're always here for you.

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