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Having a Bad Day?: Get 'yer Hugs here!!


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On 8/19/2021 at 7:38 AM, Marukka said:

First of all, that reason is a very good one but something you really should not mention in an application or an interview. It might be interpreted as "I'm looking for something easy to relax". You should probably give reasons such as "lifelong dream" or such. But I guess that's something you already do. Another thing that might be worth trying is offering to do some sort of unpaid test week. Sort of like an unpaid intership, you'll need to be able to afford that of course but this way, even if nothing comes of it, you'll be able to list it as job experience in the next application. And you might be able to just ask the intended boss if this would be something to he/she'd like to better see your qualifications.

Again there is not much I can do to help other than listening. The job market is tough, even more so in the US than in Germany where it's mostly easy to get testwork. I'm keeping my fingers crossed for you to get the job you wish for! :)

I’m not wording it that way when they ask for the reason you want to leave. I’m wording it simply as ‘Looking for better opportunities’ since that is a very neutral way to say it without getting into the topic of the place I’m trying to leave being toxic and practically a cult.

Most places just have HR contact you and I’ve only had one phone call and didn’t get a follow up to schedule an interview. I also can’t do it through email since individual stores don’t tend to have an email and only list a corporate/head office email.

I’m just doing the strategy right now of applying for all positions within an hour’s drive from me just on the off chance they want me.

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In other news my dad is a moron. He’s only letting the people at his job that we have a cruise in November. He’s had since January to tell them that we’ve got one and he keeps putting it off. His excuse? “What if they cancel it because of COVID spikes?”

Now he’s going to have to figure out if they’ll assign him to be in the Orlando area so we can pick him up otherwise it’s going to be $314 to fly him round trip from O’Hare to Orlando. The final option is them not allowing this this ‘last minute’ vacation be approved meaning we’ll have to cancel his fare.

My question now is when the bloody storms was he planning on telling them? He’s had the whole year to tell them and now they’ll be wondering what kind of flake he is for ghosting them on this endeavor.

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  • 4 weeks later...

I'm trying to figure out what it is, but the older that I get the less that my art is able to act as a distraction or outlet when I get hit with one problem or another. I moved overseas a month ago into what I knew to be less than the most ideal situation. However, the nature of this predicament that I find myself in becomes worse by the day. It seems that rather important facts were simply left out of what was told to me by my landlord and my roommate. I came in and agreed to things with incomplete information. Now I am struggling to find a way out of the worst of it while minimizing the damage. In the past poetry would have allowed me to vent. The worry is blocking my attempts at that. It is consuming my focus to the point where my art is suffering or at the very least my ability to wield the written word effectively. If not for the shard I may not have an appropriate medium to vent. Thank you all for being you never stop!!

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On 9/25/2021 at 0:18 PM, Nathrangking said:

I'm trying to figure out what it is, but the older that I get the less that my art is able to act as a distraction or outlet when I get hit with one problem or another.

Poetry requires life experience, if you feel blocked take a walk. Then maybe sit on a bench and just experience. If no inspiration comes, that's OK too. Life is a series of moments. Give yourself the oppurtunity to experience them and enjoy them. You were born with a sensitive soul, but sensitivity implies sensation. Get out, the rest will follow.

I know this feeling, it's the coefficient of static friction. It's the ability of a body at rest to resist motion.

But the silver lining is that the coefficient of kinetic friction is always less. Things in motion tend to stay in motion. You got this brother. There is beauty yet undescribed, and the arc of a life is a discontinuous thing, but the arrow of time moves ever forward.

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I had one prospective job search that looked like it would go through and it didn’t. I went during a job fair and was the only person who showed up in job interview clothes. Got called in for a follow up and they were very impressed with me during the interview and praised me for figuring out the coinage in the cashier ‘math’ test which meant I was a shoe in for the job.

Then I got a generic rejection email a couple days later. You know that generic one where they just can’t think of any reason not to hire you? That’s the one I got.

This was the only one I got where I actually got to go in person, everything else has been either email, their career website system or phone interview.

It’s kind of annoying getting all these rejections but every time I go to a store just as a customer hearing employees complaining about there not being enough people hired or they’re desperate for new hires or a few people quit that week putting more strain on them.

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  • 4 weeks later...

Vacation coming up next month and things are getting weird. We had booked activities on our cruise and now they’re canceling some for some reason. A couple are drink seminars and one was restaurant related but they’ve got the restaurant and bar crew so it can’t be a staffing issue and it can’t be a capacity issue since they only cancel if there’s too few but that only happens once you’re on board.

Going to call tomorrow to see what the deal is since this was stuff we booked only because we had $4000 worth of credit and this is going to make it harder to use all that credit by the end.

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Been having some jaw movement past few years that has now left me with difficulty biting into food. Had to get braces at 41 years old 2 days ago and omg it SUCKS! Hurts to even have air move across my teeth. Big adjustments I’m having to make.

And the McRib is back and I want 5 or 6 of them and can’t. 
 

Im so hungry but even macaroni makes me scream right now.

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I have a severe cold and runny nose, and feel like crem. My room is filled with wadded tissues and I don’t feel like doing anything. I’m taking family pictures in two days, and I look like a zombie and my red is super red and raw. I’m 4K words behind on NaNoWriMo, and I’m stacked up on homework this weekend, and have 4 essays to work on. Plus I just lost my writing notebook, which had tons of notes on characters and worldbuilding. I wanna stay up late to write or do homework, but I’m already behind on sleep. Blargedorf. Just Blargedorf. 

Edited by #1_Taln_Fan
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I’ll be so glad to leave this place in January. I only have two weeks left after this week ends but technically it’s two months because of how vacation time worked out.

Anyway what’s got me bothered now is this free crem pilot program these two storming people ordered and have no idea what they ordered and didn’t bother telling us how much is coming. We’re on the third or fourth shipment of this stuff and the company making this has no idea how to pack stuff up. A pallet could have 30 boxes but when it’s all unloaded it could’ve been 5-10 boxes instead. What they do is put five pamphlet booklets in a box that could fit 10 college textbooks snuggly and fill the rest with brown packing paper. So much is sent that it fills up the dumpster we have, which is a problem when it’s filled on Monday but trash isn’t picked up until Thursday.

In other news getting ready for vacation and my mother hasn’t even started packing yet. I’ve got about half the clothes I’m going to wear picked out but she hasn’t even started picking her clothes. She claimed to want to do that the weekend before so she wasn’t up til 3/4AM the night before like last time but instead of doing any packing she instead decided it was very important I get sandals from Skechers. I don’t even wear that brand because I don’t find it very comfortable and the sizes run small but because she loves that brand she’s determined to have me get stuff from there as well. I just know she’ll wait until the night before again because last night she just sat and watched her shows instead of getting something picked out.

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  • 1 month later...

I was helping my mother take the decorations off the year round Christmas trees we have and on the first one she had me bring the small table we had the tree on over to where we were undoing the trees and as she sets the tree on the table she bonks her head on the tree but decided to claim I set the table on her toe. Instead of being the bigger person and realizing her mistake she wanted me to once again give her a no hearted apology that I’m storming tired of giving so she turned the lights off and started watching tv while I took all the decorations off, packed the ones to keep and undid another tree all in the dark. She refused to even help sort through the decorations and see what she wanted to keep and help pack until I give her that no hearted apology which I won’t do.

The craziest thing about apologies with her is when I give a genuine, heart felt apology she doesn’t accept but when I give half hearted and no hearted she does and wonders why I ‘never’ apologize for anything. When you only want crem apologies why should I oblige at that point?

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My home situation is getting worse and worse. When schools reopened, I went to talk to my counselor, but now its Christmas vacation, and every day is a struggle. Also there's a chance on a lockdown once again happening in my city (hence, schools closed) and I am pretty scared of that. I am hoping for online exams, but school was my only solace and I don't want that taken away. My counselor was the only one I could confide in. How do I cope with it all?

And I can tell you one thing to describe what is happening at my home, is that the situation is pretty much like Shallan's was in the fact that I am not hit, but I watch my little brother get hit almost constantly.

Plus, I am not allowed to go anywhere without my mother tracking my every movement.  And she constantly puts me down. She wont ever accept my views and if I say something she disagrees with, she'll shout about how what I am saying is wrong, and I how am very close minded. If I stay in my bedroom, and I am not studying, she'll tell me to keep the door open and that there is no reason for me to close it. She makes everything about her. I told her that I had nearly read 50 books this year (something I was very excited about) and she said that 50 books was not a lot and when she was younger than me she must have 50 books in two months. She tells me constantly how weird I am and how physically weak I am, and puts me down like that. If I read, she tells me to use my time in things that matter. Please help me, please give me some consolation. I hope I don't sound selfish right now.

Edited by Elf
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I'm so sorry you're having a bad time, Elf. *many, many hugs*  Keep hanging on and remember that things will get better (I know it sounds cliched, but my own home life is seven kinds of stormed up right now, and that's what I keep telling myself.) 

And you are not being selfish in any way. From what you said, you are definitely in a stressful situation, and it's completely okay and normal to feel sad, angry, or depressed. Remember that I'm always there if you want to talk.

*more hugs*

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Thank you. I just edited my post to have more detail cause I was being kinda vague. But thanks so much for your reply. 

And you deserve hugs too. 

*Lots of Hugs*

Edited by Elf
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Don't worry about sounding selfish, you don't! Furthermore, you should at least hear that asking for help is a smart thing. Always! Even when it makes you feel insignificant or even stupid for not figuring things out for yourself,  it is a smart thing to recognize when you need help. And you already said enough about your situation at home to really justify that. Most times here, you seem just like any other happy poster here, no one would guess the situation you're in. Carrying on like that only shows that you are a very strong person. Still, feel hugged right now. ^_^

Concerning Lockdowns... I really do not know how the country you live in deals with the pandamic. Mine (Germany) does very poorly. Even though the number of infected persons is skyrocketing, it is all but certain that there won't be another lockdown. The reasons for that are purely political and not at all connected to the overworked healtycare system. A few month ago we had elections and no one dared to do anything out of the fear of losing voters. The new government is completely overwhelmed with all the problems that have to be fixed and so far nothing happens. 

I'm sorry, I drifted off. My point was that there are some very stupid reasons to delay things like lockdowns and more often than not, politics stand in the way of otherwise good measures to fight the pandemic. At least in Germany. So perhaps a lockdown in your town/country is less likely than it seems. 

As always, keep your head up! *hug*

Edited by Marukka
Spelling is fun!
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5 minutes ago, Marukka said:

Don't worry about sounding selfish, you don't! Furthermore, you should at least hear that asking for help is a smart thing. Always! Even when it makes you feel insignificant or even stupid for not figuring things out for yourself,  it is a smart thing to recognize when you need help. And you already said enough about your situation at home to really justify that. Most times here, you seem just like any other happy poster here, no one would guess the situation you're in. Carrying on like that only shows that you are a very strong person. Still, feel hugged right now. ^_^

Concerning Lockdowns... I really do not know how the country you live in deals with the pandamic. Mine (Germany) does very poorly. Even though the number of infected persons is skyrocketing, it is all but certain that there won't be another lockdown. The reasons for that are purely political and not at all connected to the overworked healtycare system. A few month ago we had elections and no one dared to do anything out of the fear of losing voters. The new government is completely overwhelmed with all the problems that have to be fixed and so far nothing happens. 

I'm sorry, I drifted off. My point was that there are some very stupid reasons to delay things like lockdowns and more often than not, politics stand in the way of otherwise good measures to fight the pandemic. At least in Germany. So perhaps a lockdown in your town/country is less likely than it seems. 

As always, keep your head up! *hug*

Thank you so much for that! Your kind words mean a lot. What you said about lockdown, I do hope it's true. But there is a big chance of it happening. Still, thank you for everything you said and for calling me strong . :)

 I realised that asking for help is a good things and that's why I went to my counselor. That decision was partly becuase of the Shard due to when I posted in this thread in July and recieved so much of support from you and the other Sharders. So thank you for that too

 I do hope things get better in Germany, and I hope everything is in peace one day for everybody.

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Thank you so much for that. Your support means a lot to me. :).

And things will get better. I will do anything it takes to have the kind of life I've always desired. Soon my days will be filled with travelling, books, and tea, and I won't have to worry about anything.

Edited by Elf
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5 hours ago, Elf said:

My home situation is getting worse and worse. When schools reopened, I went to talk to my counselor, but now its Christmas vacation, and every day is a struggle. Also there's a chance on a lockdown once again happening in my city (hence, schools closed) and I am pretty scared of that. I am hoping for online exams, but school was my only solace and I don't want that taken away. My counselor was the only one I could confide in. How do I cope with it all?

And I can tell you one thing to describe what is happening at my home, is that the situation is pretty much like Shallan's was in the fact that I am not hit, but I watch my little brother get hit almost constantly.

Plus, I am not allowed to go anywhere without my mother tracking my every movement.  And she constantly puts me down. She wont ever accept my views and if I say something she disagrees with, she'll shout about how what I am saying is wrong, and I how am very close minded. If I stay in my bedroom, and I am not studying, she'll tell me to keep the door open and that there is no reason for me to close it. She makes everything about her. I told her that I had nearly read 50 books this year (something I was very excited about) and she said that 50 books was not a lot and when she was younger than me she must have 50 books in two months. She tells me constantly how weird I am and how physically weak I am, and puts me down like that. If I read, she tells me to use my time in things that matter. Please help me, please give me some consolation. I hope I don't sound selfish right now.

Firstly, *Hugs.*. Now that that that is out of the way. I cannot even begin to imagine what it's like going through what you are going through. That being said I think that you truly are strong as others have said!! You seek light in darkness and don't succumb to it. Yours is a strength that is to be admired. You certainly are not selfish for using the shard to vent. Lord knows in my years here I have vented so much that sometimes I'm surprised that the shard has not collectively told me to shove it. We are here for each other now and until the internet runs cold. There will be warmth again. Things will get better. If you ever need to vent or talk my DM's are open!

 

Fields of gold glistening in splendid light. A throne rises up and blesses both earth and sky. They sing in unison an endless song that bears power for all time. In the heights sun and moon gaze in envy at power they may never hold. While below warmth does descend as a cloak ready for the ruler who would sit upon the serenaded chair.

Edited by Nathrangking
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1 hour ago, Nathrangking said:

Firstly, *Hugs.*. Now that that that is out of the way. I cannot even begin to imagine what it's like going through what you are going through. That being said I think that you truly are strong as others have said!! You seek light in darkness and don't succumb to it. Yours is a strength that is to be admired. You certainly are not selfish for using the shard to vent. Lord knows in my years here I have vented so much that sometimes I'm surprised that the shard has not collectively told me to shove it. We are here for each other now and until the internet runs cold. There will be warmth again. Things will get better. If you ever need to vent or talk my DM's are open!

 

Fields of gold glistening in splendid light. A throne rises up and blesses both earth and sky. They sing in unison an endless song that bears power for all time. In the heights of sun and moon gaze in envy at power they may never hold. While below warmth does descend as a cloak ready for the ruler who would sit upon the serenaded chair.

THANK YOU! I love your poems :D Your poetry always makes me feel very calm and happy :D 

And thank you for everything you said and the offer of venting in your DMs. You have no idea how much your words mean to me. And if you ever need to vent then my DMs are open too. 

All the replies here are strengthening my resolve. I really thank the Shard for being what it is.

Edited by Elf
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