Rellar

Mistborn Jokes

112 posts in this topic

Where would the Hermalurgic Olympic Games take place?

The Kolosseum

Edited by Arcoss
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What do you call it when a Lurcher flirts with you?

Pullin'. 

 

 

I regret nothing

Edited by bleeder
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What is the shapeshifting wife of a presidential candidate?

MeLaania Trump

 

Ok done now

Edited by bleeder
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What do you call it when a Faceless Immortal says two things that can't both be true?

A kandra-diction!

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On 8/28/2016 at 8:54 PM, bleeder said:

What is the shapeshifting wife of a presidential candidate?

MeLaania Trump

 

Ok done now

I laughed so hard I think I died

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Just now, Adurna said:

I laughed so hard I think I died

I dole out puns with no regard to race, sex, religion, or socioeconomic status. I'm a rusting saint, I am.

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Where are young Mistborn grown and fermented?

Vinyards.

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An Augur, an aluminum gnat, and a duralumin gnat walk in to a bar...

...

...

Nothing, because there all useless.

 

Edited by Vaatuu
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What did one emaciated nobleman corpse say to another?

Not much.

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Ouch. Some of these are painful. I'll do my best...

What have Marsh and Wax's coach-driver got in common? You should av-Hoid both of them.

Why do Wax and Wayne get on so well? They both enjoy steeling things.

What kandra is the best at imitating hands? Paalm.

I'm sorry.

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1 hour ago, The True Survivor said:

What kandra is the best at imitating hands? Paalm.

 

duuuuude

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6 hours ago, goody153 said:

duuuuude

Yeah, I know. Sorry.

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Woah, why did that slave start killing his masters?

I dunno, he just snapped

What did the Pewterarm say to Coinshot?

Stop Pushing in.

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What does The final empire and pokemon have in common?

 

Too much ash!

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What did Vin accomplish in order to measure herself next to Kelsier?

 

She took out the Lord('s) Ruler.

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This isn't mine, though I don't remember where I saw this one.

What do you call a fight between two coinshots?

Spoiler

A boxing match!

 

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46 minutes ago, Tariniel said:

This isn't mine, though I don't remember where I saw this one.

What do you call a fight between two coinshots?

  Hide contents

A boxing match!

 

Or a coinincidence?

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14 minutes ago, Eki said:

Or a coinincidence?

damnation 

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10 hours ago, Eki said:

Or a coinincidence?

Arghhh... That was good :)

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What do you call a pewter ferring who makes his own beer? 

A Brewt.

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On 10/29/2016 at 9:27 PM, Savanorn said:

A Brewt.

I am Brewt.

 

Here's another batch of (really) dumb jokes:

If Straff had a son that loved exploring, would he be called Ad Venture?

What's a coinshot's favorite British holiday? Boxing day!

What does a grumpy old Kandra say to squatters? Get off Me Laan!

That joke about the Atium compounder is always so funny! I know, right: that one never gets old!

What do drunk Allomancers do? It really depends: some Steel your stuff; others Lurch around drunkenly, and some start Smoking.

Why do Mistborn look so strange? Because they have a Tin Eye and a Pewter Arm.

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 This thread's been too quiet lately...

 

 What would you get if you cloned Kelsier's crew?

A pair o' Dox!

(I'll just leave now)

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Crappy pickup lines incoming!

Hey girl, are you a duralumin Ferring? Because I'm feeling a real connection.

Hey girl, I must be a Seer, because I'm seeing you in my future.

*Disclaimer: make sure before using lines that target is not actually metalborn. I am not responsible if any coins find their way into your head*

 

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