RippleGylf

Vending Machine: Sanderson edition (game)

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You get squashed by vending machine!

 

*Inserts Atium*

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You get a fully stored Atium bracelet with it's identity gone. Use it wisely.

*inserts the 100,000th post*

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You get a win! 

*inserts last post*

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1 hour ago, Spren of Destruction said:

You get a fully stored Atium bracelet with it's identity gone. Use it wisely.

WOOOO! NOW I CAN GET A CHILDS MENU!

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On 4/23/2020 at 2:20 PM, Mist said:

You get a win! 

*inserts last post*

You get beaten by the next person to post.

*inserts 100g of 90% enriched uranium*

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You get 1 kilo of Astatine 

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*Inserts Shardblade* 

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Oddly, all the buttons turn into smoke. You get nothing in return because you’ve killed the vending machine.

When the new one arrives, *inserts a colony of bees*

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You get a horror movie called "Bee's revenge 2"

*Inserts telescope*

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Gets information about the Cosmere.

*Inserts Covid-19*

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The vending machine gets a dry cough. Instead of one pack of hot Cheetos, if coughs up two!

*inserts vaccine*

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Gets a world of happy people.

*Insertes shard of Ruin*

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Gets a world of not happy people.

*inserts Shard of Preservation*

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The vending machine gets up and walks away. 
 

*inserts Chick-fil-a sandwhich*

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The vending machine corrects your spelling

*inserts Hoid's real name*

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You get a visit from some ninjas devoted to keeping Brandon's secrets!

 

*Inserts limitless joy*

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You get severely limited joy. And a bead of Atium.

*inserts ruby broam*

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You get Pokémon Ruby! As you play the game, you can see that a ruby broam was clearly worth it for such a classic game. 

*inserts a knight*

Edited by Truthless of Shinovar
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You get night time

*Inserts annoying sibling*

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*inserts a witty comment*

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The machine begins to violently tremble, as if every bolt and wire and steel beam wanted nothing more than to reject to what it had just been given as payment but couldn't. After a minute of shaking, the machine gives a mighty shudder, then goes still. A second later, a metal stick is thrown from the opening at the bottom, landing at your feet with a loud clatter, looking for all the world like a tree branch crafted of silver. Though it is difficult to tell for sure, you have a feeling that the faint glimmering on the surface of the stick isn't light reflected from the sun, but instead originates from the metal itself. Apprehensive, but curious, you reach down to pick up the strange stick.

The second your fingers make contact with it, you hear, no, you sense a voice screaming within your mind, hollering insults and verbal abuse, roaring as it draws forth the memories that you wish you had forgotten, moments of great embarrassment and shame. The voice reminds you of the time you accidentally called your professor "mom" in the middle of a busy lecture, it mercilessly recites the terrible poem that you had written in middle school, and replays the deeply personal and private rant you accidentally gave to a complete stranger when you had mistaken them for an old friend. You scream at the voice to stop, to cease with this torment, but it gives no indication that it cares, and launches into a story about the time you had managed to get lost in an office building, only finding your way out when a janitor heard you sobbing in the boiler room that you had inexplicably managed to lock yourself inside of. You raise your hands to your ears, and the voice stops mid-sentence. You look down and realize that the stick has fallen from your hand. You use a napkin to pick it up, being careful not to make direct contact, and think about what to do next. A thought crosses your mind and you smile. There were people out there who needed to be knocked off of their high horses. And now, you had a way to do just that.

-----

*Inserts a 300th Anniversary edition of the Words of Founding from a Scadrian bookstore*

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