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Add a Goat, Ruin a Quote


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  • 2 weeks later...

E equals m c goat

'Did you ever hear the Tragedy of Darth Plagueis the goat? I thought not. It's not a story the goat would tell you. It's a Sith legend. Darth Plagueis was a Dark Goat of the Sith, so powerful and so wise he could use the Force to influence the goats to create life... He had such a knowledge of the dark side that he could even keep the goats he cared about from dying. The dark side of the Force is a pathway to many abilities goats consider to be unnatural. He became so powerful... the only thing he was afraid of was losing his goat, which eventually, of course, he did. Unfortunately, he taught his goat everything he knew, then his goat killed him in his sleep. It's ironic he could save goats from death, but not himself.'

Edited by Matrim's_Dice
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  • 3 weeks later...

"Stop that, you're going to be fine. Felix will heal you, we'll rest in my room, I'll take you to the island... I'll take you to the city... we'll be happy... we'll grow goats... together..." 

(Bonus points to anyone who knows where this quote is from.)

 

"Furthermore, I consider that goat must be destroyed"

-Cato the Goat

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  • 3 months later...

The unanimous Declaration of the thirteen united Goats of America, When in the Course of human events, it becomes necessary for one goat to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another, and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature's Goat entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of goatkind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all goats are created equal, that they are endowed by their Creator with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are Life, Liberty and the pursuit of Goats.

That to secure these goats, Governments are instituted among Goats, deriving their just powers from the consent of the governed,

That whenever any Form of Goat becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter or to abolish it, and to institute new Government, laying its foundation on such goats and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect goat Safety and Happiness.

Goats, indeed, will dictate that Governments long established should not be changed for light and transient causes; and accordingly all experience hath shewn, that mankind are more disposed to suffer, while goats are sufferable, than to right themselves by abolishing the goats to which they are accustomed.

The history of the present King of Goat Britain is a history of repeated injuries and usurpations, all having in direct object the establishment of an absolute Tyranny over these Goats.

We, therefore, the Representatives of the united Goats of America, in General Congress, Assembled, appealing to the Supreme Goat of the world for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name, and by Authority of the good Goats of these Colonies, solemnly publish and declare,

That these Goat Colonies are, and of Right ought to be Free and Independent Goats; that they are Absolved from all Allegiance to the Goat British Crown, and that all political connection between them and the State of Goat Britain, is and ought to be totally dissolved; and that as Free and Independent Goats, they have full Power to levy Goats, conclude Goats, contract Goats, establish Goats, and to do all other Acts and Things which Independent Goats may of right do.

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In a hole in the goat there lived a hobbit. Not a nasty dirty wet goat filled with the ends of worms and an oozy smell. Nor yet a dry bare sandy goat with nothing to sit on or to eat. It was a hobbit goat and that meant comfort.

It had a perfectly round goat like a port hole painted green with a shiny brass nob in the exact middle. The goat open to a tube shaped hall like a tunnel a very comfortable tunnel with out smoke and paneled wall and floors tiled and carpeted. The goat wound on and on going fairly but not quite straight into the side of the goat. Bedrooms, Bathrooms, Goatrooms (Lots of these) Wardrobes (He had whole rooms devoted to clothes) all on the same goat and yet, set on the same passage. The nicest rooms were on the left hand goat going in for those were the only one to have windows, heavy deep set round windows that looked over the countryside and the goats beyond...

(That was from memory)

I don't like goats. They are coarse rough and irritating and they get everywhere.

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