Mistrunner

The Knights Awkward

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35 minutes ago, Grey Knight said:

 

Wow I joined an hour ago nad already I'm famous

Also thanks Grey Knight :D

 

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". . . I shall be the doom of the Knights Awkward."

Jeirid looked up, "Doom? I thought we ordered waffles!  Also, if I choose to be here, is it really enslavement. . ."

Then, pondering the nature his own question, he walks into the blazing fireplace on accident.  His hair proceeds to combust awkwardly, as he ponders the nature of doom.

Edit: He himself seems to be fireproof

Edited by RubiksCube
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Le Sigh stood with mouth slightly agape as nothing happened around him. Nobody stepped up to stop him. The only guy doing anything was standing in the fireplace, mumbling about enslavement and waffles.

As a matter of fact, where was everyone? Le Sigh looked around. The Fanshendi leaders had told him there were a bunch of humans running around here. However, the place seemed empty. It was... well, awkward. For all that effort he'd put into that dramatic speech, nobody was there to hear it.

At least, nobody who might appreciate it, the warrior thought, scowling at the man on fire. Better go interrogate him.

Le Sigh walked up to the man standing in the fireplace, grabbing him by his shirt and lifting him up so their faces were level. "Where are the other Knights Awkward? Where have they gone?"

Edited by Le Sigh
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"Even though he hadn't yet sworn an Ideal, Edgerunner glowed with Stormlight (would it still be Stormlight for a Knight Awkward?). Power rippling through him, he spoke:

Books before friends.

17th Shard before the real world.

Release dates before birthdays.

His faint glow sparked into a bonfire of Light."

Do I have to swear an Ideal and join an Order now, or can I do that later?

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Jeirid looked up at Le Sigh's question.  "It has something to do with the night's special meditation form called Awkward Pause. We -- " 

He cuts off as Edgerunner spoke the ideal of awkwardness filling with Booklight (see pg. 23 for a refrence.  Yes, I read through the first 23 pages [for the second time] before posting. . . ).

"There's another knight awkward there," he said, pointing at edgerunner.  Then, he notices he is in the fireplace, and yelps, jumping out of the flame, stumbling into Le Sigh.  

"Sorry," he mumbles.

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Inklingspren walks in, confused at the place he had encountered. people were gathered, saying words of power. "What the heck is this place?" Ink asks.

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Le Sigh swiftly turned to look towards the two new people - one who, completely disregarding his obvious dangerousness and awesomeness, had spoken the Ideals of a Knight Awkward right in front of him - and the other person didn't look like he was a Knight at all, or that he wanted to be one.

Le Sigh pointed a gauntletted finger at the one who had spoken the Ideals. "YOU!!!" he boomed. "How dare you speak those vile oaths in this place of- GAH!!!"

This last word came from when the man who had been standing in the fireplace noticed that he was on fire, and crashed into Le Sigh in an attempt to escape. The large warrior soon found himself lying on the ground under the Knight.

"Get. Off," Le Sigh said through gritted teeth. "NOW."

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"Sorry," Jeirid says again, mortified.  He climbs off, and proceeds to hide in the corner with his third copy of Way of Kings and a random bookie.

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Silva awkwardly trailed in. Initially she'd assumed this had been simply a necro that would fall dead again, though that had yet to happen. 

How strange. She thought, taking in the room's inhabitants.

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Le Sigh stood up, dusting himself off. So far, he was rather unimpressed with - as well as seriously pissed off at - the Knights Awkward. From Forium's descriptions, he'd imagined a bunch of strong and honorable warriors, not a bunch of weak, clumsy weebs who couldn't even be bothered to acknowledge a major villain when they saw one.

He walked over to Edgerunner (OOC: Not bothering to tag him as he is currently a dead user), who had just spoken the Oaths and then asked him a question about how Surgebinding works. As if he'd ever be allied with these bumbling fools.

"You," he said imposingly, pointing a finger at the Knight like every anime villain ever. "You want to become a Knight Awkward? Then you will have to go through me!"

He waited for a tense minute. Then another. And another. Edgerunner continued to stare at him.

"Hey, uh, you there?" Le Sigh asked. He waved a hand over the Knight's face. "Hold on a sec."

Le Sigh used the Surge of Meta-tation. Immediately, he gained insight to everything about Edgerunner; his reputation, his followers, his content count... and the time he last visited.

"Ah, hell. He's a dead user." Le Sigh lowered his arm. "Figures, it could've been a great battle scene. I've always wanted to try out the Surge of Adherence and see how it could work in combat..."

The giant warrior turned to the other three people in the room - @RubiksCube, @Inklingspren, and @Silva - who were presumably still alive. Well, not for long, at least, he thought. One Knight and two others; he suspected this would be rather easy.

"Very well, then," Le Sigh said. "Your doom is neigh. The Knights Awkward shall fall once and for all."

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"Well technically I never swore any oaths to make me one of the Knights Awkward," Silva says innocently. "So is my doom also nigh?"

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Le Sigh shot Silva a suffering look. "No, of course not. I only hate humans who happen to be YES OF COURSE YOU WILL DIE!!!" the warrior snapped.

Then he suddenly became serene. Raising his Awkwardblade, he spoke. "Pray I make this swift, all of you. Come at me. Show me what the Knights Awkward (and whatever you two represent) are made of." Le Sigh assumed Wordstance. The combat had begun.

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Silva threw up her hands. "Um, couldn't we talk about this or something?" She knew it was hopeless, but being pacifist at heart there was no way she wouldn't try. Either way, she moved closer to the door just to be safe. Since, you know, being pacifist and all, Silva had no clue how to fight.

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Ink groaned. "I never did anything to you, man," he said. "I'm not even one of these... whadda ya call em? Knights awkward? Also, how do you become one? Cause I want superpowers."

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Jeirid stands up, taking an offensive stance and summoning his awkwardblade.  "That name . . . Rubikscube . . . is not the name I go by, because it makes no sense in this reality.  For bringing up that dichotomy I will not show you what I'm made of!"

He hesitates.  "Though it's mostly water, if you're curious."

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(OOC to @RubiksCube: Le Sigh wasn't actually saying your username, but I just put it there so you guys know I'm talking about you. Though, since he can channel the Surge of Meta-tation, I guess...)

@Silva @Inklingspren

"No," he replied to Silva. "You humans have plagued my- have plagued our home long enough. It is time that you left this place, whether you like it or not. This world belongs to the Fanshendi, which you humans took from us. And yes, you did do something to me, Inklingspren. Your entire race did."

Then, as RubiksCube - or, as he apparently went, "Jeirid" - made a speech that would've been inspiring and rousing if it's actual content hadn't been meaningless, Le Sigh smiled. "Then you shall die, and Forium shall reign." He lunged at the man with his Blade.

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But Le Sigh bumped backwards. There appeared to be an invisible wall preventing him from harming Jeirid or as he'd soon find out, anybody. Silva didn't feel bad doing a little god-modding - she wanted to see how things would play out if violence wasn't an option.

@Le Sigh

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Ink watches, wondering why the heck he is here. He takes a sip of dihydrogen monoxide, wondering why mister sigh was so angry. "I don't represent 'my race,' I'm just a lone person. I don't know what my people did or why they did it, but I'm sorry for... whatever they did to you."

Edited by Inklingspren
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So wait, what if a release date happens on my birthday? I mean Skywards release just happens to fall on the day of my birth so it can't really be before. Either way, happy birthday to me I guess, I mean, its not everyday that you get a birthday present like that...and I'm rambling. This is awkward. Can't wait for Skyward!

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@Silva @Ladrian

@RubiksCube @Inklingspren

Le Sigh charged right at Jeirid - and then found himself flying in the opposite direction. He landed hard on his Awkward-plated bottom. "Ugh! What... the hell?!" Le Sigh squinted, channeling a bit of Meta, and could sort of make out the structure of a sort of force that would normally be intangible to the human eye. "Clever," the warrior appraised grudgingly.

At that moment, a sodium bookie clanked against Le Sigh's feet.

The huge explosion shook the room, knocking over many books and destroying countless others. The fires were not only limited to the fireplace. Soot and ash was everywhere. And where Le Sigh had formerly been was a large crater in the stone floor.

A crater in which Le Sigh currently sat, Booklight streaming from the countless cracks in his armor.

"That," he said, "Hurt."

At that moment, Inklingspren began apologizing to Le Sigh, some sort of speech about "his race" having nothing to do with the Fanshendi, but that he was . "Hmm... now that you mention it, you do look different from the humans I and my people have encountered. I accept your apology, so long as you stand down."

Then, some random guy walked through the doors and started talking about how the release date for some book was on the same day as his birthday. Not only did it break the tension, it was fairly Out-Of-Context and cheesed Le Sigh off a bit (despite the fact that he had already channeled the Surge of Metagaming twice now). "Does this look like a chatroom to you?!" the Fanshendi warrior snapped.

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Fura was minding his own business on the shard, when he suddenly heard a bunch of noise as if a battle was happening to his left.  Instead of turning away and running, he turned towards the noise.  What was happening? He walked over to the wall, and felt around, and found a secret door.  He pulled on the handle and saw a fancy door behind the secret one.  This door was engraved with the words:

Books before friends.
17th Shard before the real world.
Release dates before birthdays.

These words looked strangely familiar to Fura, but he wasn't sure why.
As he opened the door, he was greeted by an explosion.  Before he knew what he was saying, Fura spoke the words, "I will read all Brandon, even if it is not Cosmere".

A bunch of books on the walls sprang to life and shielded Fura from the explosion.

Quote

I spoke the first ideal when I read my first Brandon Sanderson book. : )

 

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" *Sodium bookies explode?  I thought Sadeas and Odium would get along because they deserve each other."  Jeiried then remembers that he was going to reread WoR, and activates a secret passage on one of the bookshelf walls, entering a reading room, and leaving Le Sigh hanging in his quest to disembowel Jeirid and see what he is made of inside (or so Jeirid thinks).

* - Goto this page, and this page for the birth of bookies and of sodium bookies

 

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But the explosion wouldn't have hurt Fura anyways because of Silva's previously instituted no violence policy. 

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But Fura didn't realize that.  Similar to the "rubber hand illusion" psychology experiment.  If you feel like you will be hurt, regardless to whether you will or not, you will still respond as is you will be.

(Plus, I didn't read all 33 pages of this thread before posting... Shame on me... : )   )

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