Jump to content

TLR and Peter's Evil Overlord List


Newan

Recommended Posts

Rashek should have read Peter's Evil Overlord List.  

Edit: Not our Peter.  Some other Peter.  At least... I think so. *GASP!* New conspiracy theory!

For those of you who haven't read it, why?  Read it.  Read it now.  http://www.eviloverlord.com/lists/overlord.html

 

And now I will be listing the rules that the Lord Ruler broke.  Feel free to join in if I missed any.  

 

 

6. I will not gloat over my enemies' predicament before killing them.

 

12. One of my advisors will be an average five-year-old child. Any flaws in my plan that he is able to spot will be corrected before implementation.

 

22. No matter how tempted I am with the prospect of unlimited power, I will not consume any energy field [shardpool] bigger than my head.

 

24. I will maintain a realistic assessment of my strengths and weaknesses. Even though this takes some of the fun out of the job, at least I will never utter the line "No, this cannot be! I AM INVINCIBLE!!!" ["God cannot be killed! God cannot be overthrown!"] (After that, death is usually instantaneous.)

 

29. I will dress in bright and cheery colors, and so throw my enemies into confusion.

 

36. I will not imprison members of the same party in the same cell block, let alone the same cell. If they are important prisoners, I will keep the only key to the cell door on my person instead of handing out copies to every bottom-rung guard in the prison.

 

74. When I create a multimedia presentation of my plan designed so that my five-year-old advisor can easily understand the details [or my old rival's journal that documents my origin story], I will not label the disk "Project Overlord" and leave it lying on top of my desk.

 

98. If an attractive young couple enters my realm, I will carefully monitor their activities. If I find they are happy and affectionate, I will ignore them. However if circumstance have forced them together against their will and they spend all their time bickering and criticizing each other except during the intermittent occasions when they are saving each others' lives at which point there are hints of sexual tension, I will immediately order their execution.

 

132. Before appointing someone as my trusted lieutenant, I will conduct a thorough background investigation and security clearance.

 

137. Before spending available funds on giant gargoyles, gothic arches, or other cosmetically intimidating pieces of architecture, I will see if there are any valid military expenditures that could use the extra budget.

 

151. I will not set myself up as a god. That perilous position is reserved for my trusted lieutenant.

 

158. I will exchange the labels on my folder of top-secret plans and my folder of family recipes. Imagine the hero's surprise when he decodes the stolen plans and finds instructions for Grandma's [Alendi's] Potato Salad.

 

170. I will be an equal-opportunity despot and make sure that terror and oppression is distributed fairly, not just against one particular group that will form the core of a rebellion.

 

186. I will not devise any scheme in which Part A consists of tricking the hero into unwittingly helping me and Part B consists of laughing at him then leaving him to his own devices. [Oops, that was Ruin.]

 

187. I will not hold lavish banquets in the middle of a famine. The good PR among the guests doesn't make up for the bad PR among the masses.

 

188. I will funnel some of my ill-gotten gains into urban renewal projects. Although slums add a quaint and picturesque quality to any city, they too often contain unexpected allies for heroes.

 

208. Members of my Legion of Terror will attend seminars on Sensitivity Training. It's good public relations for them to be kind and courteous to the general population when not actively engaged in sowing chaos and destruction.

 

220. Whatever my one vulnerability is, I will fake a different one. For example, ordering all mirrors removed from the palace, screaming and flinching whenever someone accidentally holds up a mirror, etc. In the climax when the hero whips out a mirror and thrusts it at my face, my reaction will be "Hmm...I think I need a shave."

Edited by New One
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Rashek should have read Peter's Evil Overlord List.  

Edit: Not our Peter.  Some other Peter.  At least... I think so. *GASP!* New conspiracy theory!

For those of you who haven't read it, why?  Read it.  Read it now.  http://www.eviloverlord.com/lists/overlord.html

Why?! Why?! Because some Evil Overlords have the sense not to share this kind of wisdom with everyone in order to maintain an edge! Aaaaah! Do you know how many times I've gone to share this and then been like... "Nah, better not. Might need to conquer the world, and if I share the advice therein I'll lose the advantage."

 

(In all seriousness, it's awesome, isn't it?! I saved a backup a couple of years ago because I was worried the site would be taken down).

Link to comment
Share on other sites

However, the lord ruler was being influenced by ruin to act that way, so it makes kinda sense.

Yeah I know.  I love how Mistborn subverts all the tropes, so that even when an evil emperor acts like an evil emperor, there is a deeper meaning to it.  

 

That's why my favorite of these is #186 applying to Ruin.  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

I like the list.  A lot.  Of course, Mistborn also explains why these things are done by evil overlords in some circumstances...

 

In the case of the feasts, for instance, that's as much the nobility's doing as TLR.  Lording over other people seems to be built in to us at a deep level.  Stopping it is like stopping the tide:  even TLR couldn't do that once the power of the well left him.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 2 weeks later...

 All right, he might have survived if he followed all those rules. But some aren't really realistic. A city doesn't need to be controlled by an evil lord to have slums, for example, and they are a hard problem to solve. And if you set your trusted lieutenant in the position of god, he might be the one to betray you.

Edited by Link Start
Link to comment
Share on other sites

That's supposed to be one of the benefits of Evil Overlorddome, though. Without worrying about popularity or reelections or the laws of God or man, it should be significantly easier to get rid of slums. Right now, if we wanted to tear down an eyesore building and put a new, better one in its place, there would be locals complaining about construction noise, we'd have to find the taxes to pay for it all, the people living there now would protest and complain. Evil Overlords get to tell people: "Exit your building now with whatever you literally cannot live without. You have ten. Nine. Eight..."

 

You're right about Trusted Lieutenant and God, though.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

That's supposed to be one of the benefits of Evil Overlorddome, though. Without worrying about popularity or reelections or the laws of God or man, it should be significantly easier to get rid of slums. Right now, if we wanted to tear down an eyesore building and put a new, better one in its place, there would be locals complaining about construction noise, we'd have to find the taxes to pay for it all, the people living there now would protest and complain. Evil Overlords get to tell people: "Exit your building now with whatever you literally cannot live without. You have ten. Nine. Eight..."

 

This wouldn't so much destroy the slums as force them to move.  Unless you want to kill the people who are about to be displaced?  Possible for an evil overlord, but that comes with its own set of problems.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

 Even for him it would still take a lot of money and workforce to rebuild the slums to something more urbanized. And the whole point of his kingdom was to keep the skaa living in sub-human conditions. Sure that if he treated the skaa better, rebellions would be uncommon, but why did he treat them like that, first of all? I guess it was Ruin's influence.

 Also, I edited my post. I hate it when a accidentaly write something in High Imperial.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

You'd have to push quite hard on that metal, but TLR probably could, and I guess that was the point of the linchpin spike on the inquisitors.

 Good point. In the end of the first book, he could have killed Marsh easily like that, if he was able to push agains Vin's body, but instead left him alive. Why?

Edited by Link Start
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • 1 month later...

TLR also kind of went against #104 

"My undercover agents will not have tattoos identifying them as members of my organization, nor will they be required to wear military boots or adhere to any other dress codes."

 

Also #109 is a really good idea

"I will see to it that plucky young lads/lasses in strange clothes and with the accent of an outlander shall REGULARLY climb some monument in the main square of my capital and denounce me, claim to know the secret of my power, rally the masses to rebellion, etc. That way, the citizens will be jaded in case the real thing ever comes along."

Edited by gjustice99
Link to comment
Share on other sites

  • Chaos locked this topic
Guest
This topic is now closed to further replies.
  • Recently Browsing   0 members

    • No registered users viewing this page.
×
×
  • Create New...