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People you wouldn't want to meet in a dark alley


Voidus

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Well, I've been in the lab a while. I come back and we've been promoted to Subforum! @Voidus, I knew we'd go far, but I'd thought this wouldn't happen for another hundred cycles at least. I'm proud of all of you wonderful Denizens who have made the Alley what it is today. We've endured wave upon wave of copycat guilds who sought to mimic, subvert, and undermine us. But we've held firm to the lights of Science and Baking, as we shall for time increments to come.

Here's to the Future, the illusion of Time, and to Baked Goods that know no equal. 

TO SCIENCE!!!

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  • 2 weeks later...

Mack walked into the Dark Alley, with his robes on and a card in his hand. As predicted, he was stopped by the time he made it a few alleys in by a pair of guards.

"Listen, I just have a message for @Voidus, I need him to do something for me, can you guys deliver this card to him?" The guards grabbed the card, and turned and walked off.

The card read:

Hello Voidus,

I have recently discovered an interest in using hemalurgy in my creations, as it enables them to have more personality. Right now I am working on creating automatons, but I am running into issues in giving them free will and making them sentient. I was wondering if it would be possible for me to view the work that the DA has made in this area, so that I don't rediscover the wheel, so to speak. You know how to find me if you want to respond. Mainly because you can see everything and can teleport. Consider the 3 dozen samples of my soul that you have doubtlessly collected by now as your payment.

-Mack

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  • 2 weeks later...
On 8/25/2018 at 1:00 PM, Fatebreaker said:

Well, I've been in the lab a while. I come back and we've been promoted to Subforum! @Voidus, I knew we'd go far, but I'd thought this wouldn't happen for another hundred cycles at least. I'm proud of all of you wonderful Denizens who have made the Alley what it is today. We've endured wave upon wave of copycat guilds who sought to mimic, subvert, and undermine us. But we've held firm to the lights of Science and Baking, as we shall for time increments to come.

Here's to the Future, the illusion of Time, and to Baked Goods that know no equal. 

TO SCIENCE!!!

We came before and will endure til long after.

FOR SCIENCE!!!

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1 minute ago, MacThorstenson said:

Dissecting jackals is awesome! I was doing it last week in alley 542. Unless the jackals have been revived and over run that alley, they should still be dissecting them.

I actually just got a report from alley 542, they said that the jackals seem to have absorbed some energy from some spiked dinosaurs and were now creating a religion based around worshiping Kelsier.

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In light of the influx of new members and the promotion to subforum I thought it pertinent to share some insights and advice for all new and future Denizens. 

Firstly, nothing I say matters, never take anyone seriously because they might not be real. Not even me, especially me. The null hypothesis of my non-corporeality has yet to be rejected. 

Secondly, remember that imitation is the greatest form of flattery. All of the other guilds that have and will rise up to oppose, subvert, or otherwise defeat us are actually just fans of our work, subconsciously or otherwise. Don’t be too harsh on them, as they live as the mayfly, with a lot of energy for a short time.

Thirdly, remember the age old adage: Snacks sells.

 

Edited by Fatebreaker
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12 minutes ago, Fatebreaker said:

In light of the influx of new members and the promotion to subforum I thought it pertinent to share some insights and advice for all new and future Denizens. 

Firstly, nothing I say matters, never take anyone seriously because they might not be real. Not even me, especially me. The null hypothesis of my non-corporeality has yet to be rejected. 

Secondly, remember that imitation is the greatest form of flattery. All of the other guilds that have and will rise up to oppose, subvert, or otherwise defeat us are actually just fans of our work, subconsciously or otherwise. Don’t be too harsh on them, as they live as the mayfly, with a lot of energy for a short time.

Thirdly, remember he age old adage: Snacks sells.

 

Truly beautiful and amazing words. 

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and can cause no end of headaches. Wait, what was I saying? Oh yes, Further words of warning on Sense and Spikeablility:

Whenever you have a test subject you are harvesting for a piece of their Spirit Web, remember to grant them some for of healing via hemalurgy. This ensures higher durability for all test subjects, and improves the chances of harvesting multiple times from a single subject. Waste not want not.

If you do not understand the MLP fandom, or even dislike it, do not say anything about it. There are too many of them, trust me.

Always remember that even Eldritch Abominations had to start somewhere. Don’t let your lack of pseudopods get you down!

Similarly, if it exists on any plane, it can be Spiked.

However, I highly recommend not trying to Spike pseudotemporal subjects. It can lead to temporal misalignment, which wreaks havoc with your schedule and can cause no end of headaches. Wait, what was I saying?

Edited by Fatebreaker
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Fellow lurkers, I need to make an announcement.

Somebody has leaked the contents of alley 168 to the public, and people are finding out about it, under the name of http://www.scp-wiki.net/. Who ever is responsible for this breach of security needs to come to my office so I can spike their spirit web into oblivion find out how much damage was done, and correct it. Don't worry, I'm not mad*, I just need to punish those responsible correct this grievous error before its too late.

*DA  disclaimer applies.

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6 hours ago, MacThorstenson said:

Fellow lurkers, I need to make an announcement.

Somebody has leaked the contents of alley 168 to the public, and people are finding out about it, under the name of http://www.scp-wiki.net/. Who ever is responsible for this breach of security needs to come to my office so I can spike their spirit web into oblivion find out how much damage was done, and correct it. Don't worry, I'm not mad*, I just need to punish those responsible correct this grievous error before its too late.

*DA  disclaimer applies.

Well I figured that if we released the contents of our most harmless alley to the public then they might be a bit less suspicious.

Sorry guys, I may have dropped the ball on that one.

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