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People you wouldn't want to meet in a dark alley


Voidus

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On 1/10/2018 at 1:30 AM, Voidus said:

Didn't someone start using that place as storage for our spare intelligence spikes? Last I heard the penguins had build a giant death star like construction.

Yes, we were actually testing whether their tendencies towards colonization lead to militarized conglomorations or individualized territorially focused pseudosocieties.

However, our research primarily shows that intelligence spikes have simply lead to a proclivity for puns. While in the field I heard a plethora of puns, such as: "My mother is getting older, I think she may be hard of herring." and "My cousin was a travelling salesman, but he wasn't very good. He could never seal the deal."  and "Teeth."

So far I have classified this as a rousing success. Further testing currently underway.

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A door opens from the end of the alley, a young man with a black waistcoat and pants, with a tattered shirt walks through, Hey there! I’m looking for some spikes  I... mean... Cookies! You see, our Canton of Combat is running pretty low, how much would they be? I can only pay in boxings or spheres, I’m rather low in funds...

additonally, due to our... er... Proximity... we would like a representative come join! I nominate @Maelstrom for the position!

Edited by Nohadon
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Depends, our pricing is generally focused on three things.

1. How many cookies, if you buy in bulk, we sell cheaper.

2. Cost of transportation. Due to the fact that you are in an under ground fighting club, we could open up an alley right next door, or even into the main fighting room. This would cause transportation costs to be 0. 

3. Whether or not you are returning your spikes. The spikes are expensive and we would rather like to keep the stolen investiture. If you don't want spikes in your cookies and/or you return the spikes, then the price of the cookies drops.

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Or the scream of an eldritch horror beyond human comprehension, birthed from a dimension of chaos and darkness.We only have one of the smaller infinities of them and R&D have them booked out. I want to test this theory on acoustic resonance and Connection.

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41 minutes ago, The Gecko said:

What do I need to do?

@The Gecko All you need to do is make cookie sale and then you'll be free to move up in one of our many state-of-the-art laboratories and start researching Hemalurgy. Good luck! Also, what do you mean by cookie potential from rats?

Edited by The Forgetful Archivist
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22 hours ago, The Forgetful Archivist said:

@The Gecko All you need to do is make cookie sale and then you'll be free to move up in one of our many state-of-the-art laboratories and start researching Hemalurgy. Good luck! Also, what do you mean by cookie potential from rats?

He pointed out that if we gave rats lerasium and they were able to burn it, we could breed them rapidly and use them to farm hemalurgic spikes en masse.

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After having looked over their oaths and the manner in which you said them, I wouldn't think so. At our heart, we are scientists, bakers, and businessmen. So long as your oaths don't impact all of those duties you should be fine. 
 

Also, you don't have to sell cookies past the first. Personally I find it beneficial to do all three, theorize, sell cookies, and bake, but you don't have to. 

@LopenTheTwoArmedHerdazian

I Have found it useful to use this link to recruit more people.

 

Edited by MacThorstenson
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Good, job on the cookies!
The Baking can apply to either part. The more delicious the cookies/assorted baked goods are, the more people will eat them.

Also, word to the wise, it's considered bad form to post multiple times in a row, if you have more information that you want to add, it's advised to edit your previous post or wait till someone else posts.

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Thank you. I’m quite inexperienced on the 17th shard. So, here’s a question. In a perfect world, where all alleys are dark alleys, do we still sell cookies, or do we share our cookies with our dark alley brothers in exchange for baking and theorizing work? Or will we create a monopoly and then slowly bring up our prices without losing customers because we have reached a level of baking where our cookies are incredibly addictive? Either way, I’m game.

Edited by LopenTheTwoArmedHerdazian
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1 hour ago, LopenTheTwoArmedHerdazian said:

Thank you. I’m quite inexperienced on the 17th shard. So, here’s a question. In a perfect world, where all alleys are dark alleys, do we still sell cookies, or do we share our cookies with our dark alley brothers in exchange for baking and theorizing work? Or will we create a monopoly and then slowly bring up our prices without losing customers because we have reached a level of baking where our cookies are incredibly addictive? Either way, I’m game.

Well, to understand this, one must understand the alleyverse. I am not a master of alleymatics, but from what I understand all of the dark alleys are in place called the alleys which is located in the alleyverse. Other places in the alley verse include the roundabout and the highway. Inside of the alleys you have places like the dark alleys, the light alleys, and the mediocrity lit alleys. You enter the alleys by walking into an alley in the human world, so in a way this perfect world has come to pass.\

With that in mind. Our goal is to discover the limits of Hemalurgy and push those limits as far as they can be pushed. So we will continue selling cookies as long as we can, because we still need test subjects to experiment on. We don't actually make any money off of most of the cookie sales*. They buy our cookies with their soul. Considering that rarely do our test subjects survive the first round of experiments, there is very little need to make our cookies addicting, except for consumption by fellow dark alley members. I hope that answers your question.

On an unrelated note have we outfitted you with the basic benefits? (Gold compounding to heal your self when you remove a spike and copper feruchemy to store memories in.)

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