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Hey all, So I've been workshopping a vanilla character with @Chasmfiend, and I realized that although we encourage new people to make vanilla/human characters as well as epics, we don't really have a good list of suggested roles for vanillas to fill. Now obviously the roles available to vanillas vary city to city, so I'd invite the other G.M.'s (when they have time) to post a list of suggested roles here. Other players are also free to post suggestions as well, of course. I can copy and paste master lists into this post, if others agree, so that it's easy to find. Corvallis Vanilla Roles: I hope these help as a starting point. Individual players can give blanket consent if they want to people making servants or workers in certain sectors.
So yeah, this is what I made for the Tyrannopotomus Rex prompt in a recent episode. Enjoy, if you can Trouble was coming. The bull Tyrannopotomus Rex could sense it; smell it in the air. But of course trouble was coming. It's always coming at the beginning of stories; if there were no trouble, there would be no drama, and therefore no way for ridiculous and silly things like the Tyrannopotomus Rex to become ridiculously popular with the masses. However, you have been lied to. I don't know how, or where, or why, or when, but it has happened once in your life. Also just now when I lead you to believe that trouble was immediatly forthcoming. The truth is, the trouble our heroic Tyrannopotomus Rex feared was not to arrive until hours after his original observation. I could have used a short, efficient timeskip, but I chose to do this instead to help you have some empathy for the poor animal. He literally did nothing but stand in a river for 10 hours, and I hoped to impress on you the insane levels of boredom he heroically endured. He cleverly took a nap to pass the time, boldly leaving his herd defenseless for hours in end, despite the fact that he knew danger was coming. Now, I’ve already wasted a lot of your time, but I have decided that you still cannot empathize with our Most Excellent Protagonist™, so I have added the following intermission. No, I’m not going to let this up. Quit trying to convince me. You won’t deceive me with your lies; this is not ruining the flow of my story, no matter how you slander me. This is boring? I suppose… but that’s the point! Oh, fine. The trouble eventually did come, in the form of a tribe of Tribicerasontops. They were charging at the river the Tyrannopotomus Rexes(Rexs? Rexii?) were resting in, running from something; probably their own collective shadows, or perhaps a groundhog. The bull Tyrannopotomus Rex prepared to fight, because he was an animal, and had no concept of diplomacy or even getting out of people’s way. The other Tyrannopotomus Rexii fled, leaving the bull alone. He did not care. In fact, it is likely he did not notice, and was distracted by an insect floating in the water. That hypothesis would also explain why, when the charging herd of furry monstrosities crashed into the river, the bull Tyrannopotomus Rex did nothing to defend himself and was ingloriously slaughtered by the bovisaurs. As he fell, the ugly brute reflected one the fragility of life, and regretted abandoning his herd(he had, by this point, noticed the herd had gone; however, he assumed that he had somehow wandered downriver). How he did this, despite being--as we established earlier--a dumb animal, is a question still debated by scientists to this day.
Since I finally changed my wall calendar to December I decided to introduce a couple of holiday writing prompts, just for the heck of it. Since it was the first one to pop into my head, this first one will be Christmas themed, but I don't want to exclude any other holidays like Hanukkah, so by all means give me suggestions. Credit will be given to the original creators. The only stipulation is that they have to be random. Like so: First, listen to this lovely modern Christmas carol by famed minstrels Relient K. Prompt: It is Christmas Eve. You are driving your car [make and model of your choice—it doesn't even have to be a car!] when you see a bearded, heavyset man in a red coat hitchhiking. You stop and ask if he needs a lift. He breathlessly explains that his sleigh broke down and he needs someone to drive him around the entire world in just one night so the little children of the world aren't disappointed come Christmas morning. "Whatever you need most, I'll give it to you!" he says. Do you take him up on his offer? If so, why? If not, what happens when you drive away?