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Everything posted by Mage

  1. I just listened to the prophet's message about hope and gratitude, and just want to say how grateful I am that we have a living prophet who leads our church. You all need to go watch that. It was so good!
  2. So, this year I signed up for NaNoWriMo. I've been writing fiction for a while, but it has never been the main thing in my life, just a fun hobby. I planned out a novel series, and started writing the first book. Then I heard about national novel writing month, and decided to sign up. 50,000 words over 30 days comes out to 1667 words a day, and I did that today, but today is also a Sunday (an extra long Sunday for those in areas that do daylight savings). So, does anyone have any advice about doing this, or just writing in general? Also, does anyone want to be NaNoWriMo buddies, to help motivate each other?
  3. Alright. I think I am going to be going off the forums until I get a chance to read Rhythm of War. I don't know if I am going to buy it right as it is released, so I am at the mercy of my library as to when I am able to read it. I would hate to have it spoiled accidentally, so farewell everyone, and I will see you all in a post-RoW world.

    1. Ookla the Tortured

      Ookla the Tortured

      Bye! Be back soon!

  4. Yeah. We weren't having church anyway, but we are switching from stage three down to stage two. It has been way to long since I have been in church. I'm excited to hear Pres. Nelson's message on Thursday though.
  5. I would just like to take a moment to remember the greatest game show host of all time: Alex Trebek. Jeopardy was my childhood. I learned so much random--but good--stuff on that show. It was a fun activity that I would do with my family, and brought us closer together. So I'd like to thank Mr. Trebek for that. Rest in peace Alex.
  6. Forshadowing?
  7. Thanks for the feedback. I'll get into Gordge's backstory more, but maybe I should give a little more up front so that people aren't confused. And you're right, that other point is a bit unclear. I'll take a look at that and see what I can do to fix that error.
  8. Okay, so @HoidWasTaken, you pointed out to me that I was coming up on 100 posts. Thanks for that. Knowing me, I probably would have blown right by that without even knowing. I couldn't think of any great memes, or unifying theory of the cosmere, to celebrate this. Instead, I figured that I might post some of the novel I am working on. It isn't fantasy (sorry). I know we are all fantasy fans. I have a fantasy series planned, but I am currently working on a sort of sci-fi, thriller, doesn't really fit in a genre, but think Mission Impossible, but in a book and with more character development (don't get me wrong, I love MI, but the characters don't really change at all, they just shoot stuff and climb things). So, I guess for my 100th post I'll post the prologue and chapter one. Don't judge. Well, do judge. I appreciate any feedback, but this is a rough draft, so grammar feedback isn't as important to me at this point. But uh, here goes I guess: Swear words have been *ed, for your protection , and yes Gordge is spelled the way it is on purpose. Thanks, Mage
  9. Alright. 10 days in, and I am mentally exhausted. This is so hard to write this much every day. However though, it is crazy how much I have written and I can see my writing improving. This is a mental workout if I had ever had one. It feels the same mentally as running a cross country race. I want to quit, but I know that I can't.
  10. Not really. But I think that it demonstrates what the Guild of Masters is, by showing where they have spread their influence. Armstrong was an agent for the Masters who was infiltrating NASA. After his landing on the moon, he continued to rise through the hierarchy of the Guild until he became Grandmaster. I also feel like it would relate to the reader better. They know who Neil Armstrong is, and can then somewhat relate more to the story. I probably could do it with a fictional character.
  11. I've got something like 17 chapters written, and I have been writing a lot recently, so I figured I would post a chapter a day until it caught up to me. This time though, I did a spell check first, and added some subtle things to contribute to the characterization (I think. It may have been for a later chapter. Don't exactly remember). So, for all interested parties I present, Chapter 2: The thing I would most appreciate feedback on is verb choice, and characters. Thanks! Oh! I just remembered 1 more thing. What do you think of having Armstrong as a character. It might be weird considering that he is a famous historical person, and also dead. I don't know. What do you guys think?
  12. I hated this in starsight, when spensa was talking to Cuna and it referred to Cuna as ‘they’ I was always so confused because I’m used to they as a plural.
  13. Thanks for the feedback guys. Unfortunately the whole Sherlock scene drained most of my funny banter reserves, so there is less of that in the next chapters. but in future drafts I’ll try to add more. Any ideas would be appreciated. I’ll explore Caesars motivations more in the future. It is more than just bringing back Rome. I just don’t want to give away caesar’s identity yet.
  14. I also today just checked out his autobiography from the library. My hold coincidentally came available on Saturday. It is really good, and I recommend it, though I will warn that there is some language. I got a copy of the audiobook, and the readers are Alex himself and Ken Jennings. It is really cool to know his story, along with the Alex we knew from TV.
  15. Hotheaded Lord Buckethead skatesd around the stone Scadrial spaceship spore to annoy 25,000 angry dinosaurs, but 90 groovy chickens danced with 4,000,000 dead and rotting buffalo skin couches imploded.
  16. @Channelknight Fadran, I just read chapter one, so I can't speak for your plotting or worldbuilding skills, but I do know that you are a master of the English language. As someone who appreciates good writing, but isn't quite as able to imitate it, I think that this is the best non-professional fiction I have ever read. Beautiful sentence structure, and excellent verb choice. Very well done.
  17. Okay, so when I am just drafting I am not that funny. I have to plan it more, and then implement the humor, but I did manage to find this in my manuscript. It might be a little bit funny, especially when taken out of context.
  18. The man walked to the hardware store to sell 2000 Rosharan chickens.
  19. The Manheim Steamroller version is my favorite. It is an awesome song, but the context of a Gregorian chant with bells just ups the coolness.
  20. Bartholomew Rogers stopped walking and looked up at the brownstone in front of him. He stood, hands on the hilts of his two silver daggers, for what felt like a long time. His journeying was over, but he had left the trials and adventures of his childhood on Threnody only to come to begin a new adventure in Alley city. Bart wouldn't admit it out loud, but deep down he felt a lack of purpose. While he acted like he new what he was doing, with so much determination that he forgot about other people, he didn't really know what he wanted. A life fighting shades in forests didn't satisfy him. So he had left the Cosmere. The Alleyverse was his last chance to find his purpose, and he wouldn't leave until he knew what everything was for. Bartholomew breathed deeply, looked up at the sun setting behind the worldspike, then walked into the boarding house to see about a room.
  21. I know that everyone else seems to love this chapter, but if I'm being completely honest, it wasn't my favorite. I thought that the interactions between Kaladin, Syl, and his parents were a little bit cringey. I'm glad that Kaladin is back with his parents and all, but I feel like this chapter wasn't the most well written. Just my opinion, but I see where everyone else is coming from in loving this chapter.
  22. Got it. One of the best parts in the book. As I remember it they were supposed to be having an insult battle, but Kelsier like usual didn't want to play by the rules.
  23. Ok. I've got a quick easy one. from who to who and in what book?
  24. @Shard of Reading I think I joined the same day as you, and you have over 1000 posts whereas I have less then 100. I'm thoroughly impressed.
  25. Was it mother or grandmothers?