Stevent

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About Stevent

  • Birthday 06/24/1983

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  • Website URL
    https://www.jerkbrain.com

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  • Gender
    Male
  • Location
    Tulsa, Oklahoma
  • Interests
    Not only am I revising my first fantasy novel, I'm writing a cyberpunk serial.

    www.jerkbrain.com/2020/08/02/biotank-unit-x/

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  1. I've always been partial to a flame-whip a la Castlevania.
  2. Chapter 15 probably isn't the best place for me to start reading any novel, especially one I'm trying to look at critically. That said, I tried to take it as a short story and enjoy the slice of lifeness of the piece. Overall, I like the character's interactions. It feels natural. I do have to agree with an above comment that the revolutionary character does seem like they are in it out of boredom. This isn't necessarily an issue on its own (unless of course it contradicts something in earlier chapters). There are people in the real world who get involved in political and social issues for no other reason than that they don't have anything better to do. This could be a fascinating thing to explore in a character - especially if Su's newfound comrades begin to feel that she isn't as devoted as they are. Is she a true believer? A weekend warrior? A spy? Whatever the case, there is real potential there for conflict with not only the authorities but the revolutionaries as well.
  3. The only Moorcock I've read is a few issues of the Corum comic adaptation (and that was like 25 years ago) so I'm starting with Knight of the Swords. I'm enjoying Eye of the World and am interested in where it goes. I'm finding the second act to be a slight slog. Oh, what's this? Rand and Mat are in another village juggling and avoiding Darkfriends? Wonderful. And yeah, I've been accused of comma abuse a few times. Punctuation isn't my strong suit; that's why I'm here. Usually I just drop commas wherever I feel like there should be a pause.
  4. thanks, I'm looking forward to it being read!
  5. Thanks for the welcome! So far so good with Eye of the World. I'll at least read the next couple of books, but the entire series is a bit daunting. My to-be-read pile is pretty big, I'll probably tackle some Michael Moorcock next I think.
  6. Hi, my name is Steven and I'm a writer. I'm currently creeping through the last chapters of the 1st draft of an 80-90k word fantasy novel. The 2nd draft will be so much fun [/sarcasm]. It's my first attempt at fantasy - it didn't start out as such - but I think I've got it firmly within my grasp. I think. I'm mostly an outline-writer, but I'm trying to experiment more with making things up as I go. Mainly that experimentation comes in the form a cyberpunk serial story I'm posting to my blog. Otherwise, I'm just some random dude on the internet. I read all kinds of things but generally I gravitate towards the weirder end of things. Dempow Torishima's "Sisyphus" is pretty good. Presently reading "Eye of t he World" on my wife's recommendation. Pleased to meetcha!
  7. I can't plan for character/emotional beats beforehand. Plot, I can do. The character stuff either comes out as I'm writing... or it gets figured out later and dropped in where needed on the second draft.
  8. I think the trick here is for the character - if you want them to be sympathetic - to not believe (or know) that the organization is a terrorist one. The question must be asked, how does the character view the group? "Terrorist" is a term so relative that it may as well be meaningless. If you see a band of violent militiamen as freedom fighters it will be a lot easier to convince yourself that joining up is the morally right thing to do. But, if you see that same group as terrorist from the get-go, your joining will likely require some coercion, duplicity, or personal gain. Perhaps they are forced to join because they have some special skill the group needs. Maybe they're an undercover agent who means to undermine them only to be brought to their side. Maybe they just want to make a quick pile of cash. See every heist movie ever for reference. I think what I'm saying here is this: Throw out the buzzword of "terrorist" and start investigating how the values of the group compare/contrast with those of the character.
  9. So I'm 55k into my novel (looking like it'll be about 80k total) and am switching POV every chapter. My question is, how many POVs is too many? I have four who are what I'd call the 'main' characters but several others get a chapter or two when I need to show things that don't directly involve the MCs. Is there a point where switching POVs gets tiring for the reader? I know I enjoy getting multiple viewpoints when I'm reading a novel, but I'm not sure how others generally feel about this sort of thing.
  10. Yo! My name is Tyler. By day I drive people around town via lyft/uber and attend classes in pursuit of a degree in English education. Free time is spent with my wife, three dogs, and a cat. Currently, I'm about 55k into a sci-fantasy novel. A meeting with an editor at a local writing conference has bolstered my confidence and am eager to get this first draft done (then revised and rerevised). Currently reading Battle Royale by Koushun Takami. Before that I read the City & the City by China Mieville. Eagerly anticipating Stormlight IV.
  11. I like the idea behind this. A person who can be ripped apart and then reassembled has a lot of potential. Despite some clunkiness with the prose, I was compelled to push forward to see where it was going. My biggest question/recommendation is this: who is the POV character in this scene? I think if you figure out whose eyes I'm supposed to be viewing this story through and then shape it to fit that character's particular voice, you could really have something here.
  12. My biggest piece of advice would be to consider what ramifications your magic/technology would have on the real world. Can people teleport? Then think about what that would do for transportation. Can people get nutrition from sunlight? Well, what's that going to do for agriculture? And so on and so on until you've got something that feels developed.
  13. This is the direction I'm leaning. What I've got in my head -and I'll have to do a bit of sketching to puzzle it out- is a cross between a viking longship and a zeppelin. I like the idea of 'rowers' working the mechanism that turns the propellers. Thanks!
  14. There is some magic involved but, so far, it is all magic generated by people (i.e. transmutation, healing, etc). What I've been thinking -in a nutshell- is that the underside of the ship has a lattice of magic metal, which, when properly charged, generates anti-gravity. My issue lies in how that antigrav material is charged (likely a man-powered generator) and how to push the ship forward once it is in the air. Possibly a pair of rear facing antigrav panels?
  15. I'm new here so, welcome to me. I'm hoping that you fine folks can help me solve a puzzle. I'm working on a fantasy novel set in a pre-industrial society. This means skyships and very limited firearms. I already know what gets the ships off of the ground -I just don't know what pushes them forward. What I'm looking for is some system of powering these things that isn't fossil fuel based. That is to say, no steam. I'd also like to avoid sails. Any help is much appreciated.