I am the owner of a wonderful restaurant called The Happy Inquisitor. Please visit us in the RP section!
I am also the self-proclaimed ruler of the Forum Games.
I wrote an extended version of The Girl Who Looked Up. Here’s a link if you would like to read it. Brandon Sanderson said this about it, which makes me very happy:
Disclaimer: Any and all typos will be used against you.
If you ever need someone to talk to, feel free to PM me!
I have had this page be mostly empty for far too long, so here are some random stats! (None of these are up to date (Like literally none, it’s a problem at this point))
Spambots helped to vanquish count: 270
Average number of posts per day: About 33
Number of times I have changed my rank: 5
Number of different reputation levels I have had: 56
How many years it would take me to individually post enough content to double the current post number: 68.3
Number of RP characters of mine who have been shipped: 2
Number of times I have growled at people (since 4/29/19): 38
How many people’s hearts I have made ache (using sad stories, not spikes): 7
My alleyverse character, Lily:
Name: Lillian “Lily” Tovar
Investiture: She is a first ideal Truthwatcher.
Skills: She is very smart, and those who know her consider her to be a genius, although she would never admit it. She is also a rather skilled thief.
Equipment: A bright blue and green Aviar named Sky with investiture hiding/coppercloud abilities.
Weakness: She will do anything to protect Sky, even if it costs her life. She has very low self esteem and constantly underestimates herself.
Family: The Tovar Family (7th Dahn)
Home Planet: Roshar
Backstory: She was raised in the household of a fairly low dahn family and was a very sheltered child. Her parents were worldhoppers, but they never told her. As a child, she just assumed that they went on lots of business trips, but now she is starting to question what they were really up to. They brought back an Aviar named Sky with them for her from what they told her were their “travels”. They claimed that he was from Shinovar. Her parents suddenly disappeared when she was 17 years old, and she never found out why. She suspects that someone or something took them unwillingly. She always keeps Sky with her to remember them and loves him fiercely. The disappearance of her parents distressed her so greatly that she developed enough cracks in her spirit web for a Truthwatcher spren to approach her. Her spren is named Lumi, and he is her best companion. She has not sworn any oaths above the first ideal, however, as she is too frightened of attracting whatever took her parents from her.
Guild: None (at the moment)
Psyche: Friendly and generous.
Personality: Shy and not very trusting.
Appearance: Black hair streaked with red and blonde (due to her mixed blood) that goes just past her shoulders (she keeps it in a ponytail whenever she feels like she needs to focus), bright blue eyes, 5’6, slender
Fighting Style: Sneaky
* My jabbering (Sorry it’s inside of Lily’s bio, it wouldn’t let me put in two spoilers or anything after this spoiler)
Having been commanded to jabber, Luna decided to tell a random story. It would be a story about a man named Bob. Bob was a very friendly man. But not everyone was so friendly. There was also a man named Joe. Joe was not a friendly man. He was, in fact, evil. So evil that he wanted to destroy all of the apples in the world using his evil device, the Apple Destructor. Bob didn’t like this. Apples were his favorite food! So, he went on a quest to stop the evil Joe. Joe lived in the great swamps of Galvania. The great swamps of Galvania were very far from where Bob was, and he needed to go there to destroy the Apple Destructor. However, he didn’t have a method of getting there. So, he went to his local Horsemart to purchase a noble steed. After walking past many rather mean and lazy horses, he found the best horse that he had ever seen. Its gleaming white coat and silver hooves looked amazing, and it looked very powerful. But after checking the price tag, Bob quickly walked away lest he accidentally damage it. He did not have near enough money to buy it, so he had to settle for a mean and lazy horse instead. He named it Nippy, on account of how it tried to nip him whenever he got too close. To mount Nippy, he had to get a running start so that he would be on top of Nippy before he noticed him coming. Bob led Nippy to the line at the cash register. He stood in the line, which seemed to go on for nearly a mile, for several minutes without it moving. So, he decided to use the self checkout station. The only problem was that he had no idea where the barcode was to scan on Nippy. He checked behind an ear, but it wasn’t there. He checked the top of his head, but it wasn’t there. He checked under all four hooves, but it wasn’t there. While he was searching for the barcode, he was nipped several times. This made him unhappy. However, he was determined to stop the evil Joe, so he kept on searching. Several nips later, he realized that the machine had an option where you just typed in your product’s name to pay for it. He face palmed, then proceeded to do so. After purchasing Nippy, he was ready to go forth and begin his quest. He got a running start, hopped up onto Nippy, and started making his way to the Great Swamps of Galvania. On the way there, he noticed a witch standing on the side of the road selling potions. He nudged Nippy to go faster, as he knew that suspicious witches selling suspicious things were never to be trusted. Bob continued along. Soon, his stomach began to rumble. So, he parked Nippy in the parking lot of a nearby McDugals and went inside. He purchased some McNugats for Nippy and a BigDug for himself. Walking outside, he gave the McNugats to Nippy and began to enjoy his delicious BigDug. But all was not well. Nippy was jealous of Bob’s BigDug. So, as soon as Bob got near, he snatched it out of his hands and swallowed it whole. Bob sighed, then ate the McNugats instead. Remounting Nippy, he continued on his quest. Soon, he approached the Great Swamps of Galvania. They were very smelly. So smelly, in fact, that as soon as he dismounted, Nippy bolted and ran all the way back to the McDugals, where he took over and ate everyone’s BigDugs. Bob, now with his nose plugged, continued on his way. He soon discovered the source of the foul smell- stinky cheese. Instead of dirty water, the swamps were filled with liquid dirty stinky cheese. By the time that he got to the evil lair of Joe, his feet were covered in it. The evil lair was a single skyscraper that reached all the way to the clouds, where the stink of the swamps could not reach. The evil Apple Destructor was on the top floor. Bob snuck in through a window. When he got inside he sighed, as he realized that the sky scraper had no elevator. He would have to walk up all 628 flights of stairs. Determined to save the apples, he began to do so. Along the way he was forced to avoid several booby traps such as giant rolling boulders, spikes that shot out of the walls, and a (thankfully) frozen block of acid. Some time later, a sweaty and panting Bob finally made it to the top of the tower. He rejoiced, but then soon stopped as he heard the ominous battle music of a boss fight begin to play. The evil Joe rose up through a trapdoor in the floor amid smoke and flames (for dramatic affect). Bob, who couldn’t be bothered to fight Joe (he was much too tired from climbing the stairs) threw a spike from a trap at the evil Apple Destructor, impaling it and causing it to explode. The machine, having taken Joe a lifetime to build, was irreplaceable. Having accomplished his mission, Bob quickly ran back down the stairs, as Joe was chasing him. Joe got closer and closer, and Bob began to worry. Luckily, the stench of the swamps soon began to resurface as they got lower and lower. It eventually drove Joe back up, and Bob was free. He returned home (on foot this time) a hero. Unfortunately, no one believed his story, so he went on to live an average life. The end.