Zephrun’s Imperium

The emojis changed???? That is heresy.

I am also a certified triple A. *high fives*

You would get upvotes from me just for Gravity Falls memes, but those are some top tier quality memes.

Well good luck to you, I suppose.

Dear god this is a mess. Okay hi, I’m Zephy, previously known as Star. For the last five years I have been working tirelessly on my own CBSS adaptation inspired by the events started around page 320 of TLT following the story of Narrator Star Celeste I have basically done a COMPLETE overhaul of the characters, story, and magic system, to the point that it’s only tenuously linked to the source material. The CBST/TLT four part magic system is really cool, but it’s also fiendishly complicated and - as always with me - I want to write a story that serves character more than worldbuilding and is tightly held together by theme. TLT is cool and it always has been. But as someone who has been working on making something coherent based off of it….. It’s hard. Incredibly hard. Trying to incorporate all the interwoven threads (hehe) of plot, characters and worldbuilding is one hell of a task. It’s incredibly hard to work with two people towards one creative vision, much less a handful or more. But what makes TLT so cool IS the fact that so many people contribute to it. So be careful. - Zeph <3

The Cosmic Battle to Save the Thread

Ah, I’ve done so many face reveals lol.

Y’all, the LGBTQ prom was actually amazing. I think I adopted someone. My friend spent four hours on my nails. Gender affirming clothing am I right? Imma steal your partner, for real.

Ahem. *offers art* And Cipher-inspired make up?? and memes, that too

Labels are really nice, but I’ve found that they’re often incomplete and our identities are flexible anyway. It’s okay to not have a label, especially as you’re still growing and discovering who you are; you are perfectly yourself. I can relate to this. I could go OFF on my thoughts about gender… Society just makes me so angry sometimes. The worldbuilding here is interesting, but, like…. I live here. I have to deal with stupid societal stuff. It’s not fun.

After years of doubt and anger and anxiety, I have come to the conclusion that I do not believe in the existence of a god. Part of the reason I believe what I do is because it is the belief that affords me the most peace. For me, the implications that come with the existence of a god are terrifying: either this god cannot intervene in times of tragedy (personal or global), doesn’t want to, or - worst of all - is the cause of our suffering. To me, pain is unacceptable. There is no good reason why we have to go through it, there is no apology that makes it worth anything. I refuse to worship suffering by saying that it made me a better person. Because I am not my suffering. I am a much happier, freer person when absolved of the divine. And the way I see it? There are so many religions with so many different ideas of what it takes to have a pleasant afterlife that if I try to follow all of them to cover my bases, I’m going to run myself into the ground. Why should I even care about what happens after I die? I want to live right now, I want to be happy right now, and I deserve peace right now. I spent far too long waiting for a god to deliver me when I had all I needed to deliver myself the whole time. And the fact is, none of us really know what happens after death, so why does it matter? Besides, I think being good for the sake of being a decent person to others is even more moral than doing it out of fear of some faceless god’s judgment. My thoughts are well-summarized by the following quote: Being raised on the assumption that a god existed and supposedly loved me was one of the most painful and devastating things to ever happen to me. Seeing children die of cancer and friends suffer at the hand of mental illness and trauma will never be compatible with the loving deity I was taught existed. To anyone who finds comfort in the idea of a god, I fully support them and would never want to take away that belief. However, I would also ask that believers respect other beliefs; I find it demeaning when people feel pity for me because my beliefs or my identity as a genderqueer, demisexual, panroamtic human means I might not make it to an afterlife that I don't even believe in and I find it insulting when they feel arrogant enough to take it upon themselves to try and save my soul. I am also strongly opposed to the idea that humanity is evil by nature - that can cause devastating issues of self-image - and the idea that I should credit all my happiness and good fortune to a god. The universe is amazing and no matter your beliefs, our existence within it is a miracle, secular or divine.

Y'all are sleepin' on the most iconic human here. @xinoehp512 is the worldbuilding emperor. He is one of the best writers I know and his creativity is astounding. I've known him for four years and he has grown immensely. What an excellent human being. I will never be able to give him enough praise.

Anyone who's known me for long knows I've had intense struggles with mental illness throughout my life. I've experienced severe depression and anxiety and I have fought them hard. But a couple years ago, I would have denied that it was even possible for me to be mentally ill in any way. Because people like me don't have anxiety or depression; people like me don't struggle at all. I was wrong. Everyone struggles. And if you're discounting your own experiences right now - "other people have it worse than I do" "I don't need help" "I'm not as important as other people" - then I have to ask you to question that mindset. You deserve to be happy. And not in some phantom afterlife or faraway future either; you deserve to be happy right now. The soul of mental wellness is self-love. You gain nothing by not being kind to yourself. A future built on a past of self-loathing is not nearly as bright as one built on self-love. You're going to live out the rest of your life in your mind, so I implore you to make it a pleasant place to be. Do things that make you happy. Spend time with your loved ones. Treat your body with kindness - I promise it is doing its best and is not out to get you. Notice the little everyday wonders around you - sunshine is beautiful, but thunderstorms are majestic too. Stay in the moment - the past is unchangeable and the future is impossible to know. Smile more, if you can. Laugh loudly. Let yourself feel. If you're going through it... I'm so sorry it's hard right now. The world is better for having you in it and even though nothing will ever excuse what's happening or what's happened... I am proud of you for every breath you take. Maybe the only one you aren't enough for every second of every day is yourself. I will leave you with a poem that has touched my soul: There Will Be Rest by Sara Teasdale There will be rest, and sure stars shining Over the roof-tops crowned with snow, A reign of rest, serene forgetting, The music of stillness, holy and low. I will make this world of my devising Out of a dream in my lonely mind. I shall find the crystal of peace, - above me Stars I shall find.