Jump to content

Goatbringer

Members
  • Posts

    207
  • Joined

  • Last visited

  • Days Won

    13

Everything posted by Goatbringer

  1. I regret to inform you all that my wife has said Knights of Wind and Truth sounds like Knights of Wind and Toots and is going to be a book about farting.
  2. Morning everyone. So something weird happened to me today. I've been re-reading The Bands of Mourning this past week in heated anticipation for The Lost Metal later this year. I think the last time I read it was the day it came out, so it's been about five years since I read it and I only remembered some snippets of it - it was like reading the whole book over again. However, from my first read there were some pretty potent memories - just flashes of important scenes I remember: Wax at a party and running into Khriss, Steris and Wax falling in love, discovering that Kelsier lived, an ancient temple, Wax crushed and nearly dead, and a bruised, battered Wax towing a huge airship by a rope through a snow-covered valley. Before going into my re-read, these were the only scenes I remembered from the book. I finished the book last night but - that last scene wasn't there. The closest instance to that is where Wax uses allomancy from the Bands to pull the floating airship out of the sky once he had beaten Edwarn. But no rope, no Wax on the floor of the valley with the ship floating, no battered and bruised face... none of that. It was one of the most potent memories I had from my first readthrough, and I remember thinking "hell, Wax is a tank" in that scene, realising that Brandon had bigger plans for him. There were a lot of things that I straight up forgot happened, like I didn't remember Telsin featuring whatsoever, I didn't remember that the Bands were concealed in the spearhead, I didn't remember going to New Seran, etc. But I definitely remembered that scene with Wax, a rope, and the airship. What's happened to me? Was there an earlier draft of The Bands of Mourning that had some scene like this and was cut, like Szeth's death in Words of Radiance? Have I completely fabricated a memory? Or are we dealing with the Mandela Effect here? Does anyone else remember a scene like that? I guess... there's always another secret.
  3. @Ixthos You were right! This is now live on his site if people want spoilers for the title/content of SP1: https://www.brandonsanderson.com/first-look-at-secret-project-1/
  4. Hey I think I missed the memo - are the first title announcements/chapters being released today or are they going to start next Thursday?
  5. Brandon writing one secret book is on-brand. Brandon writing five secret books is borderline parody of himself.
  6. Guys – I know this is a weird post, but I somehow felt it in my heart and wanted to share my observations with you. This is going to be very niche, but it is for people who understand both the Cosmere and rugby. I’m a HUGE rugby fan, and with the British & Irish Lions tour going on in South Africa, rugby has been on my brain a lot. Because the tone of the series from both coaching staffs has been quite toxic though, I have wanted to channel that rugby-brain towards something fun and away from negative youtube comments about Maro Itoje’s dirty tactics and Faf de Klerk’s high tackles. Because at any given time I’m also thinking about the Cosmere, I came up with what I consider to be the premier starting 15 for an all-Cosmere rugby team. Because I’m assuming that the Cosmere fan and the rugby fan only rarely intersect, I’ll do my part to explain each starting position to you and why I chose each character for their role on the team! I’ve also tried to include a character from each series so as not to overload the team with one particular planet. I’ve also tried to steer away from any god-like beings – no Shards are going to be part of the team. Weird concept, I know, but here’s what I got! Front Row The front row consists of two props and a hooker. Usually, these guys are the popular conception of rugby players: big, hairy, ugly, and powerful. They’re often never the tallest players, but are almost always the heaviest players. The front row’s main job is to scrummage well as well as use their bulk to be lineout lifters and clean out rucks. It was tough to find characters who are short but powerfully built in the Cosmere, so I’ve gone with a taller front row than you might usually find on a rugby pitch. 1: Loosehead Prop – Galladon (Sel) I’ve always seen Galladon as an anchor – and I can see him doing this on the loosehead side of the scrum. He’s described as firm of frame with wide hands and keen eyes – so I see him as kind of a Beast Mtawarira kind of prop: a good combination of brains and brawn. 2: Hooker – Hammond (Scadrial) A hooker has an additional job of being the thrower in the lineout, so they need to have pinpoint accuracy as well as strength. Lately as well, a hooker acts as the fourth back-rower in the team, being more mobile and able to poach balls. That’s why I’ve gone with Hammond. Being a pewterarm he (or she, in the film version!) will have no trouble with the physicality of the game, but Ham’s also got a good head on his shoulders and could identify an opponent who becomes isolated. 3: Tighthead Prop – Baon (Taldain) On the other side of the scrum, tightheads usually do a ton of work without having their praises sung. They’re also usually the biggest boys on the park. I’ve gone with Baon from White Sand. He’s a big guy with wide shoulders, but he’s going to be underestimated due to his physical appearance and has a skillset that will shine through when it needs to (his being able to use sand is an example). Second Row Second rowers, or ‘locks’, are always, always the tallest players on the rugby field. Their job is to use this height and their long legs to call and win lineouts as well as provide power in the scrum for their front rowers. 4: Front Lock – Human (Scadrial) The number 4 lock is usually the meathead of the two. His job isn’t to call the lineout, so he doesn’t need to be as cerebral or as sneaky as number 5, but rather play off instinct and let his physicality rip up the other team. For this reason, I’ve gone with Human the Koloss from Mistborn as the front lock. As big, powerful, and violent as they come, but retains that little memory of humanity not to get red-carded. 5: Back Lock - Numuhukumakiaki’aialunamor (Roshar) As much as the number 4 is a brute, number 5 has got to have at least a little understanding of the game and how to run complex lineout moves. I’m thinking that Rock would very much enjoy rugby as it doesn’t have any overt killing involved and he can actually put his skills to good use in the second row. I also think that his being able to see spren will give him a leg up on any opposing locks. Back Row The back rowers are most often the team’s best players and pack down on the flanks and the back of the scrum. They’re forwards who are more mobile than their front and second row compatriots, and their main job is to tackle, tackle, tackle. The trend with most teams is to have a designated ‘poacher’ as a member of the back row, whose job it is to linger around the tackle area and see if they can strip the ball. 6: Blindside Flanker – Vasher (Nalthis) A blindside’s job is to be an absolute bastard and cause as much chaos as humanly possible. They’re usually big, powerful, yet still mobile enough to disrupt balls at the ruck and maybe get a turnover or two. I like Vasher for blindside flank – he’s a big guy, but he can also be totally brutal in battle if he wants to be. He also has that classic grouchy countenance that a lot of blindside flanks have that fuel their destructive tendencies. And just imagine what he could do in unsheathing Nightblood out on that field… 7: Openside Flanker – Hrathen (Sel) This one is a bit of a left-field choice, but I’ve decided to go for Hrathen from Elantris as my openside flanker. A lot of people will tell you that openside flank is the most important position in rugby, so you have to choose carefully. We know that Hrathen can mix it up with the best of them and has good skills in disarming, fighting, and disabling his opponents – a great David Pocock-esque skillset for an openside. We also know he trudges around in full plate armour all day, meaning the dude is ripped. I was tempted to go with Dalinar for openside, and I definitely think the Blackthorn would have been one twenty years ago, but I feel like he’s retired now. Hrathen, however, is just on the cusp and probably at his peak right now. 8: Number Eight – Eshonai – (Roshar) Your number eight should be the all-around forward: destructive ball carrying skills, cerebral enough to make decisions from the back of the scrum, and be decent under the high ball. For this position, I’ve gone with Eshonai. As the warleader and Shardbearer of the Singers in books 1 and 2 of Stormlight, she definitely has the battle skills to be a number eight, as well as the keenness of mind to know when and how to make her moves. Half-Backs Now we come to the backs – in general, backs are quicker and smaller than the forwards, and their job is to score points. If the above are employed to boss around the opposing team and retain the ball, the backs are employed to exploit the space the forwards provide and score tries. The two half-back positions, scrum-half and fly-half are probably the most important attacking positions in rugby, so having a pair that know each other well is important… 9: Scrum-Half – Vin (Scadrial) Your scrum-half is more often than not the smallest player on the field. You ever see those crazy pictures of two guys playing rugby where one is like half the size of the other? Yeah, that’s usually the scrum-half. These guys are quick, dangerous, and instinctive – playing with both reckless abandon and tactical astuteness. Their job is to get the ball from the base of the ruck and distribute it. I’ve gone for a character with an all-around skillset here: Vin. Halfbacks need to be able to kick, chase, tackle, pass, and read the game – so having a Mistborn with a plethora of skills is handy (especially if she has atium). What’s great about Vin is that since she’s a tiny little thing, she’ll be constantly underestimated by her opponents until she levels them with a pewter-enhanced tackle. 10: Fly-Half – Kelsier (Scadrial) The fly-half is the quarter-back of rugby – they make most of the tactical decisions on where the ball goes next once they get it from the scrum-half and are usually the smartest player on the field. This one was definitely a no-brainer – Vin and Kelsier make a deadly duo, and Kelsier’s experience with his Mistborn powers make him more level-headed than instinctive Vin. He’s also got great experience rallying people together, although he may have a hot head and can pop off sometimes, but hey, as long as he directs it well, that’s going to be useful. Centres Centres are usually the bigger guys when it comes to backs. As second receivers, they will probably take more contact than other backs and their job is to use their power to drive through the defenders, giving space for the wider backs to make the beautiful things happen. Centres also have to be defensively solid, as most of your opponents attacks will come from the mid-field. I always like a tried and tested combination at centre, and fiddling around with two guys who don’t know each others’ playing style always leads to miscommunication and defensive lapses. That’s why I’ve gone for two Rosharans in the midfield: 12: Inside Centre – Adolin (Roshar) Even without Radiant powers, I don’t think there’s anyone I’d bet against with Adolin at inside centre. He combines the power and raw brutality of a Shardbearer with the soft-footed finesse of a master duelist combining the power of a forward with the talent of a back in one package. I’ve also gone with Adolin as team captain. Sure, there are others who may be more skilled, older, wiser, and more experienced, but Adolin is just such a likeable, empathetic guy: he’d make a fantastic captain to rally around and would bring out the best in all of his teammates. I doubt even Kelsier could have a bad thing to say about Adolin’s noble-born status once they get to know each other. 13: Outside Centre – Kaladin (Roshar) Adolin’s midfield partner has gotta be Kal. Has the attacking skills to be a back, but I think where he truly shines is in his defensive instincts. If you tell Kaladin to imagine his team’s try-line is a poor, defenseless soldier drafted into Amaram’s army, he’s going to be the best goddamn defender on your team, making him a perfect hinge on defence, able to snuff out the first hint of attack with his battlefield awareness. When he has the ball, he’s got the attacking skills and the knowledge of his mid-field partner to make in-roads every time. Outside Backs Outside backs are usually the fastest and the most attack-minded players on the team. They will often stay out of the main defensive line, covering for longer kicks for the chance to counter-attack. They’ve got to be good under the high ball and have decent kicking skills. While wings are notorious for being the weakest on their team in terms of defence, the fullback is often the last line of defence against an attack in open space, so they’ve got to have a good skillset. Some teams, like the All Blacks, in the last few years, have used their fullback in a more creative role as a second playmaker in tandem with the fly-half. 11: Left Wing – Szeth (Roshar) I’m going to go with Szeth as a left wing. I think because he can fly, he’ll be pretty good under the high ball. I also think that with lashings, he can do a bang-up job in getting some speed down the left touch-line. Szeth is also much more attack-minded than defensively skilled, and if he doesn’t go crazy from the voices in his head, can be the team’s top points scorer. 14: Right Wing – Lift (Roshar) While Lift may be too young to play full-tilt rugby, she is a Radiant and can heal from injuries really quickly. Lift could really be the next Shane Williams or Cheslin Kolbe – a small pocket rocket who is nigh-impossible to get a hold of due to her abrasion surge. 15: Fullback – Waxillium Ladrian (Scadrial) I like the dual playmaker set-up, so I’ve gone with Wax in the fullback position. While my initial instinct was to have Hoid as one of those wildly unpredictable fullbacks, I think Wax is a solid choice. As a coinshot, he’ll be safe under the high ball, and as a lawman he’ll understand the importance of his defensive responsibilities. And I figure we can have Wayne on the bench as our back-up scrum-half – if anything happens to Kel or Vin, sub on Wayne and bring Wax up from fullback to play half-back. Head Coach: Dalinar Kholin (Roshar) Bondsmith. Old warhorse. Knows every trick in the book to win the battle. Next. Attack Coach: Jasnah Kholin (Roshar) I think that if there is anyone in the Cosmere who is going to be creative enough to be a game-winning attack coach but who may not want to stoop to get dirty with the rest of the players, it’s Jasnah. Jasnah is always forward-thinking and willing to use any means to win. Defence Coach: Raoden (Sel) Dude understands the importance of defending one’s city. He may not be cut out to play the game itself, but he can read an attack and find a way to defend against it like the best of them. So there you have it! Rugby fans of the Cosmere, do we agree? Disagree? Have other choices? Let me know!
  7. Fantastic - I've been so excited to see art from the trip to Lasting Integrity!
  8. Here's a little special surprise for you - one is a pic of Tay actually using a Stormlight reference on a public forum for everyone to see when she asked a question on her Instagram of what tattoos people want to get. Big win, there. The next is a video that she insisted I share with you of her using the Instagram cosmere character filter (much apologies - I do not know who created this filter!) Also warning - I know this board flags swears that we type out in these replies, but Tay swears in the video. So if you're a little sensitive to language, uh, don't watch. Cosmere Character.mp4 I hope you enjoy this small Tay interlude.
  9. Ah, yes, see - I tried to explain to her what "the Lord of Scars" meant, but her eyes completely glazed over.
  10. Okay, fair enough - that's my bad. I didn't record anything for her there. In terms of Taravodium, she didn't have any witty reactions, she just stared at me with wide eyes - probably the same reaction a lot of you guys had to the Ascension. We did talk about it after, and she reckons that this is a really good thing since if you go look back at some older posts she is very much Team Taravangian ("Thanos was right" is a literal quote of hers as well) - she thinks he can do a whole lot of good with Odium's power. I'm not so convinced... he's still planning on sending a Champion to fight Dalinar, after all. In terms of the double villain upgrade, are we talking El? Tay didn't really react to him. Kind of just assumed he's obviously set up as the next secondary villain in book five - a la Raboniel/Persuer in book four.
  11. Her reaction to this comment was "see? I told you that you don't appreciate me enough!"
  12. Ladies and gentlemen – this is it. This is the final post that we’ll have in this thread for the next… three years? Ah, Idos Domi! What a long time to wait! Kelek’s breath! Well, either way, you know the old saying – something about the journey being the good part? Like, it comes before the place you get to? Ah I forget it. Either way. Here’s Mrs. Goatbringer’s final thoughts on Rhythm of War! -- ME: *reading along normally* “Which master-” TAY: Witch master? COOL! What an awesome title! Like the Witcher, but the WITCH-MASTER! ME: No… like, ‘which master do you serve’? There are many potential masters, so which one? TAY: Oh. *Pauses* TAY: I like mine better. -- *Navani thinking to herself about what Jasnah would do if she was trapped in a horrible situation* TAY: What would Jasnah do? Navani, you spent the last three books complaining about your daughter and now you’ve got some respect for her? -- TAY: What if singers are tone deaf? ME: You know… I have absolutely no idea. -- *After Navani shows Raboniel how to make anti-Voidlight and she then uses it to make anti-Stormlight, lying to Navani* TAY: Make this meme: -- *The High Judge and Restares is revealed to be Kelek* TAY: Kelek! He will teach us bronze! I’ve been waiting for him! -- TAY: Oooh, Shallan’s got a magic axe. ME: It’s a dagger. Were you even listening? *pause* TAY: Maybe not. -- TAY: So she kills Restares, then Lightweaves the trial in Adolin’s favour? She’s getting all she wants in one fell swoop! *pause* TAY: Heh. Swoop. Because Mraize has chickens. -- *Talking about the Contest of Champions* TAY: Oh man, is this going to be like Bridgerton? With its duels and sexy, sexy testosterone? -- TAY: I think Navani and Raboniel are sapiosexual for each other. Calling it. Leave your war criminal husband, Navani! -- *no prompting* TAY: Kaladin is just too good for Dalinar. -- ME: You know that people are kind of disappointed that you don’t use the nicknames for the characters anymore? TAY: It will make them feel better that it took me four separate thousand-page books to get these names right. -- TAY: Wait, why aren’t we making these nerds pay to listen to my reactions? This should be a Patreon. Or an OnlyFans. ME: “OnlySafehands”. TAY: And I have a nice one too. -- *Raboniel describing Braize* ME: “the place is barren, devoid of life. Merely a dark sky, endless windswept crags, and a broken landscape. And a lot of souls. A lot of not particularly sane souls.” TAY: Oof, Raboniel. Why are you describing my personality? -- TAY: Navani listening to Raboniel is me watching Janelle Monae. She’s getting feelings she didn’t know she had. -- Simply noting here that Tay correctly guessed that Maya would absolve Adolin at his trial. -- TAY: So what did shart do? ME: Wait – what? TAY: Sha-art? Shnart? ME: … Sja-anat? TAY: Yeah, her. Shart. ME: Good god. -- TAY: Bow chicka-wow-wow! Roland bout to git invested with a tower! ME: Who? TAY: Roland. The listener who is Kaladin’s friend. ME: Rlain. It’s Rlain. -- TAY: *censored* you, Lirin, you *censored* piece of *censored*. -- *Quoting Venli* ME: “I’m a selfish, impotent, sorry excuse for a listener.” TAY: Hard agree. -- *You know what part* TAY: *whispers* I hate Moash. I hate him so much. -- TAY: *singing* This is where therapy would have helped you, Kaladin! -- *Kaladin has armour now* TAY: Wait, what!? ME: Kaladin just said his fourth ideal… it’s kind of the main climax of the book. TAY: Yeah no, I was building up to it but then there was a funny Tik Tok and I had to watch it. How did it happen? -- TAY: Kaladin’s like *makes ‘driving fast’ noises* on his way to becoming a radiant. He gives himself such flack but he’s done good quickly. -- TAY: What the actual *censored* is a sky burial? Do they just drop kick them into the air? -- *scene with Dalinar and Ishar* TAY: I hear you’re in need of a gonnegtion. Heh. Meyer Wolfsheim. He was the original Bondsmith. -- *Tay is a little incensed that the Windspren just become Kaladin’s armour* TAY: Honk honk honk! You can become a shield for Kaladin now! -- TAY: I am very upset about this whole “Navani being a Bondsmith” thing. -- *Moash in the room with Navani* TAY: Navani, murder this *censored*. -- ME: "Journey before destination, you bastard." TAY: Okay, that was pretty hardcore. -- *reading some part* ME: “I can barely make sense of what you said.” TAY: Me, reading this book. -- TAY: Hah! Man, I am here for a sword-ninny spin-off! *pauses* ME: Are you really? Because if you are, I have some great news for you. -- *End of the book* TAY: And we are no closer to Dalinar winning back Tayla’s affection. -- *Biggest revelation Tay has had about Stormlight* TAY: Wait – crem isn’t poop? From cremlings? ME: What? No, crem is like, liquid rock that is dumped by the Highstorms. You thought it was… poo? TAY: … yes? ME: For four books. TAY: In my defence, crem is said a lot and in most of those contexts, it could be referring to poop. The crem is poop from cremlings and they’re like pidgeons so they poop a lot! ME: *stares into the camera* TAY: Why did you like ‘crem before cremlings’ then? If it’s not like ‘poop before poopers’? -- *Kaladin’s healed scars* TAY: Hah. Slaveboi got botox and a retinol peel. -- Tayla’s big desire for book five: Adolin gets treated with some damn respect from Dalinar for once, and he awakens Maya and bonds her. -- And there you have it, cremlings! (her catchphrase takes on a whole new meaning now, doesn’t it?) We have come to the end of the extant Stormlight Archive books! As hinted earlier in this post, Tay might have a listen to Warbreaker at some point, but we’re not going to jump in now. Most of our reading happens at bedtime, so she wants to listen to something that she’s not necessarily going to lose sleep over if she sleeps through it (did I pick a bad expression there?) So, we’re reading The Wheel of Time, the book series that actually caused us to first meet – but that’s a story for another time and another message board. Maybe we’ll see you for some novellas, maybe not, but either way, we’ll see ya in 2023 for book five. And remember: Crem before cremlings. -- BONUS: *Tay reading this thread* TAY: Haha! Man, I’m hilarious!
  13. We’re back for another exciting edition of “Tay Falls Asleep Within 2 Minutes of Me Reading So I Have to Start the Chapter Over Again the Next Day”. We’re workshopping the name, but at least it’s honest. Since the moderators have kindly moved this thread over to the Rhythm of War spoiler boards, I’m not going to hide these reactions behind a mask of mirrors no wait, an invisibility cloak ack still wrong fandom… a spoiler lightweaving. Part III reactions ahoy! -- TAY: Chris, write this down so that I can tell you “I told you so” when I’m right. The Sibling is going to switch on Urithiru by plugging in sword ninny. -- TAY: Adolin should be the Bondsmith. He’s so much cooler and better at bringing people together than Dalinar. Plus everyone likes him. -- On the above note, Tay had much to say about Dalinar. Now that she knows his backstory, she’s not as quick to forgive him as many other characters are. Much like Adolin, she is kind of putting up with D-Man because the whole fate of humanity rests on his shoulders. But she’s still pretty mad about the whole ‘burning his wife to death’ thing. Can’t really blame her though. Be ready for some Dalinar roasting (pun intended) -- *Dalinar tells Jasnah he disapproves of her plot to get Ruthar out of his position* TAY: *angrily* Oh! Really, Dalinar? Nobody in this tent gives a *censored* what you think! Supercilious blowhard. After Evi, you never get to hold the moral high ground! Jasnah should call him “Uncle-who-knows-jack-*censored*-about-*censored*”. You found this entire experience “distasteful”? Know who else found this entire experience distasteful? YOUR WIFE. Oh wait, she can’t experience anything ever because she’s now dead. I swear, he could have vertigo from the pedestal he thinks he’s on. *Interestingly, I think Taravangian says something very similar to Dalinar in their chapter together in this Part* -- *Gavinor asking if his father was brave when he died* TAY: Oof. Little guy is asking the big questions. -- *Dalinar and Renarin are speaking to each other while Sigzil is Worldsinging* TAY: I mean, I think it’s kind of rude that they’re interrupting Schnitzel telling his campfire stories, but okay. These are the kind of guys who don’t clap when there’s a live band. -- *Dalinar is being a good dad to Renarin* TAY: HEY! Dalinar! Why are you only being nice to one of your sons! This is Radiant privilege and I will not stand for it! -- *At this point, Tay got excited about which characters we were in the Knights Radiant official quiz up on Brandon’s website. As you no doubt remember, we did this last year when it dropped – Tay was a Windrunner and I got Lightweaver, much to Tay’s laughter. This time, we did it for each other – answering what we believed about the other person. Tay got Windrunner again, but this time I got Truthwatcher.* TAY: It’s because I am consistent in my character and you? You are a fickle *censored*. -- TAY: Venli wants to remake the Listeners? Man, hasn’t she read The Great Gatsby? You can’t relive the past, old sport. *This may well be the first time she’s mentioned Venli. This is because Tay hates Venli. Like, “Shallan-in-the-first-book” level hate* -- TAY: Brandon Sanderson writes about fashion and people who are interested in fashion like someone who has never cared about clothes in their life. “Adolin did up his buttons. They were shiny and round and fashionable, the peak of Alethi style.” -- *Syl impersonating a Voidspren* TAY: “I’m really annoyed?” Oh my god, Syl is you. A polite Canadian trying to be angry. -- TAY: Is it just me, or does “The Pursuer” sound like a bad WWE character? ME: Not gonna lie, I’ve been picturing him as Triple H. -- TAY: On that subject, ‘The Lady of Wishes’? You can’t tell me that’s not the name of the mistress of a high-end brothel. -- *Points for Tay – she has guessed that Venli will free Lift… but she guessed it before Venli spoke her rejected Second Ideal* -- *On the topic of emulsification, Tay has helpfully put forth the idea that mustard would be an excellent emulsifier for Voidlight and Stormlight since it works well for vinegar and oil in a salad dressing. She frequently asks “Where’s the mustard” when Navani and Raboniel are on the topic* -- *Tayla is also being a real trooper in the Light theory chapters. While I found them fascinating, Tay has been instantly brought back to the horrid spectre of her grade 11 science classes… a class in which she was one percent off an A. As a result, I’m having to give her some Cole’s Notes on the progress Navani is making* -- *Discussing the Magnified Ones and whether Edgedancers could do that* TAY: So I could just make a tree appear and block a shard? That’s what I’ll do. Make a tree pop out of my skin. ME: You’d need seeds to do that, I think. TAY: Yeah but I’d be prepared. I’d keep seeds in my pockets and then BLAM! Tree-face. -- TAY: Wait, so Odium’s voidlight is violet? ME: Violet-black, yes. TAY: But his followers’ eyes are red. And their skin is red, black, and white. ME: Yeah. TAY: But he’s always described in gold robes? ME: What are you getting at here? TAY: Odium’s colour palette is all wrong. He needs to Stick. To. A. Simple. Colour. Palette. This is not on-brand. This is not how you raise an empire. Ugh. -- *Dalinar talking about how Taravangian is able to influence others* TAY: I like the idea of Taravangian being an Instagram influencer. “Take a burst shot of me as I commit this atrocity!” ME: “Do these burnt orange robes make me look fat? Be honest, Adrotagia.” -- *Tay has a pretty okay theory that Dalinar testing out his Bondsmith powers during a Highstorm will allow him to progress faster, due to the Connection and the closeness of all three Realms* -- *Dalinar in the Highstorm* TAY: I can show you Roshaaaaar. Shining, shimmering, wetness! -- *Chiri-chiri is mentioned* TAY: *incessantly sings this* -- That’s all for now, folks! Next one is gonna be a combined Parts IV and V because of, well, you know. Crem before cremlings!
  14. Yeah I worried about this and tried my best to keep everything under spoiler wraps, but I appreciate the move to the RoW board nonetheless
  15. @Trutharchivist thanks... I thought there was something like that but wasn't sure
  16. Guys, it’s a Koloss Head-Munching Day Miracle. While Tay was kind of keen to wait on the Graphic Audio version of Rhythm of War, she realized that it’s going to be, like, a year before all six parts are released and we can listen to it all in one go. As a result, I am currently reading to her (and imitating the excellent voice acting from the previous Graphic Audio versions), while Tay does some sound effects when prompted (she was very good at imitating the red chicken from the Lift interlude). All this to say: we’ve started Part III of Rhythm of War, and since this is not in the designated RoW section, all of Tay’s reactions and theories will be covered by the Shroud of Spoilers. Again, just to be absolutely clear, please do not read the below if you have not yet read Parts I and II of Rhythm of War. Happy reading! And there you have it, folks! Will Tay’s predictions about Taravangian come true? Will she get progressively more annoyed at Venli? How will she react to the flashbacks? FIND OUT NEXT TIME! Crem before cremlings. *Bridge Four Salute*
  17. I love all my interludes, whether they tie back to the main plot or not
  18. So this is less of a theory and more of a "huh, that would be neat, wouldn't it?" thought I had today. From Rhythm of War, one of the funnest cosmeric connections made is that This got me to thinking - in the final part of Mistborn: Secret History, Considering Brandon has told us that similar-sounding names are usually done on purpose (I think the example is that the Worldsingers of Roshar and the Worldbringers of Scadrial are somehow connected), I was thinking that there's an obvious connection between these two: (the rest of my not-theory contained in the spoiler) Like I said, not much of a theory - but if that's the case, I'd be pretty happy!
  19. Fun fact, the tavern that Bridge Four debates going to in Words of Radiance is called "The Ornery Chull".
  20. Cremlings! It has been far too long since we have graced this board with Tay’s witticisms about Slaveboi, JDM, Sneak, and all of our other favourite characters. Allow me to be the first to apologise for the lapse, but it’s been a long, slow journey through the last part of Oathbringer. However, I am very pleased to let you know that as of a couple of days ago, Tay finished book 3… and is thoroughly exhausted by it. It will be a while before we contribute to this board again, but I thought I might add this post today so that you guys have a little pick-me-up in the hand-wringing, nerve-wracking last four days before Rhythm of War drops. Without further ado, here are Tay’s contributions from Parts II to V of Oathbringer! -- *Kaladin is flying around with his big spear energy* TAY: *under her breath* You idiots. The skies are mine so suck my *censored* -- *Stormfather is being ornery with Dalinar* TAY: The Stormdaddy is such a sulky *censored*. He’s the kind of guy who would get a haircut, then get mad that Dalinar didn’t compliment him right away. -- *I am explaining to Tay that there are boards dedicated to theories around Book 4* TAY: Do you call them ‘Uritheories’? ME: … no, we don’t. TAY: You should call them Uritheories. You should tell them that I said that. -- *Jasnah is getting the transcript of her memoirs sent to her via spanreed* TAY: You’re gonna wanna write this pearl down. *pauses for effect* Jasnah should call her memoirs ‘The Princess Diaries”. Heh. -- *Navani is distracted by something and makes a flippant comment about Jasnah* TAY: PAY ATTENTION TO YOUR DAUGHTER NAVANI AND BE NICE TO HER! -- *Our Main Characters find out that Talenel is the actual Herald, not just some madman* TAY: So wait – you’re saying that they should have been feeding Talenel grapes and fanning him with palm fronds this whole time? -- *Mraize offers to help Shallan cover up any murders done in the name of the Ghostbloods* TAY: Okay I’ve got a golden nugget for you. Mraize is a pretty good employer. Hear me out! ME: What!? TAY: HEAR ME OUT! He only asks Shallan to do what she’s already doing, pays her by saving her family members, and offers covering up murders as part of her employment package. Can you imagine how much less stressful my job would be if I knew they would cover up my murders? -- *Odium meets with Dalinar in the visions* TAY: *sighing* Not sure I’m not Team Odium. Why wouldn’t you want to fight for passion? That seems like such a good thing to be the god of… not, whatever the opposite of passion is. I guess that’s Shallan. She’s the opposite of passion. Editor’s note: this is not the first time Tay has agreed with a villain in a major series – she felt like Thanos was very misunderstood. -- *Kaza’s interlude* Usually with interludes, I’ll describe what happens and Tay will say yay or nay to them since she isn’t interested in things other than our Main Characters. However, when I described how one of the Sleepless kills Kaza and the entire crew of First Dreams, this was what she said: TAY: Oh, that sounds cool. I wanna see people dying. Not sure that helped with her growing perception as an Odium sympathiser, but hey. -- *Kaza standing on the bow of a ship* TAY: See her now as she stands on the bow of a ship headed to a new land! In Aimia you can cast some souls! -- *I ask Tay what she thinks destroyed life on Aimia* TAY: *full of confidence* Oh, I know what did it. The dead sprens did it. Not the Dawnshards. Dead spren washed over it like an ocean of corpses. Then everyone on Aimia killed themselves. -- *Dalinar fighting Fen’s son* TAY: So this is Dalinar’s Strat? Just to get stabbed? -- While there were no zingers at Evi’s fate, we both are of the opinion that it is a little upsettingly cliché – the whole Fridge Horror trope of women being killed only to add to the character struggle of the main male character. Sanderson certainly has some great, progressive female characters, but it’s kind of a bummer that this trope wormed its way into the series. -- *Taravangian Interlude where he tells them to kill the singing children* TAY: Man, I guess I’m also Taravangian too. -- *Discussion on safehands* TAY: Hey, tell this to your shard people: do you think Sanderson created safehands because they are what he wants? You know? Like how some guys go crazy over feet? Think he’s all into handies? ME: I’m upset that this topic has been broached. -- *Tay likens the Stormfather’s visions to getting high* TAY: Stormdaddy party tricks get lit in a hurricane bru. -- TAY: Can you swallow a sphere to get Stormlight? ME: I guarantee you you’ll have an answer by the end of this book. -- TAY: I think I’m an Alethi. ME: What makes you say that? TAY: I would murder people for my cats. -- *Dalinar comes out of his rage-killing by smashing some dude’s head into a pulp* TAY: Big mood. -- Dalinar’s speech to Sadeas and his generals after he decides he’s going to go full scorched-earth on the Rift was so exceptionally badass for Tay that she got me to read it aloud to her family. -- *Szeth is back and calling Nightblood “sword-nimi”* TAY: Wait – is he calling it ‘Sword Ninny’? ME: No, he’s saying ‘sword-nimi’ like it’s a sign of respe- TAY: Doesn’t matter – it’s Sword Ninny now. -- *Overhearing Tay talking to our cat in the other room* TAY: Cosmo! Who’s my little Voidbringer? -- *Nightblood is making fun of Szeth for listening to the commands of his ‘magic rock’* TAY: The abject beauty of a magic sword looking down on a magic rock. -- TAY: Oh! I’ve got a good one! I have two memes you have to make for me about Taravangian – the one where he’s doing the mathematics in his head, and then the one where he’s doing the conspiracy theory on the wall. ME: I guarantee you those memes already exist. Lo and behold, they had the conspiracy one, but they didn’t have the math lady meme so I made one: -- *I described how Taravangian wrote the Diagram on every surface of his room* TAY: Why do you write like you’re running out of time? -- *Odium destroying Dalinar’s vision with Venli* TAY: Odium is like a shark. He investigates with his mouth. You know. Violence. -- TAY: Veil is me. I, too, choose my outfits based mainly on pockets. -- At one point a couple weeks ago, we were driving somewhere and made sure to avoid a stalled truck that was holding up traffic on one route. Turns out, it had been fixed and drove onto the route we were then taking to avoid it. It was vaguely funny, but then Tayla said this: TAY: Tayla attuned amusement. She then made a sound like a turkey being strangled and I nearly crashed the car from laughing so hard. -- *Odium gives Dalinar back his memories of Evi, but he’s already been getting them back* TAY: Haha! Odium! That’s all you got? Why do you think I haven’t been sleeping for six months? -- *Adolin gets stabbed by the Fused in Shadesmar during the fight at the Oathgate* TAY: *on her phone* Wait, Adolin got stabbed? *pauses* And he can’t heal himself, right? Ah okay I should actually pay attention to this part. *Puts phone down* -- *Skar and Drehy reveal they saved little Gavinor* TAY: Bridge Four Nannies: we protect those who cannot protect themselves. Our packages also include pickup from school, help with homework, and defense against the Unmade. -- *Odium’s discussion with Taravangian* TAY: Aw man, Taravangian is Boromir. He’s a villain, but all he’s doing is for the people of his city. -- *Jasnah becomes queen* TAY: *banging metaphorical pots and pans* Jasnah is SMASHING THE PATRIARCHY. HERE. FOR. THIS. -- *I had trouble remembering the name of the main female character from The Boys (that show on Amazon Prime that’s vaguely like BrandoSando’s Steelheart)* ME: Yeah, you know – uh… Shiny Girl. Dawnshard? What’s her name? TAY: Starlight? ME: Yeah, that’s her name. Shiny Girl. TAY: You have to tell them that you confused her name for Dawnshard now. -- Additionally, Tay wanted me to point out to you that because of my accent, she initially thought I had been saying Dawnshart, much to my chagrin. -- Speaking of Dawnshart Dawnshard, I’ve already read it – but Tay’s going to be taking a break from Stormlight for a while. Hope you guys have had a fun time reading these posts and we’ll be back… maybe some time next year for Rhythm of War. On that note – AHHHH GET EXCITED Y’ALL! ONLY A COUPLE DAYS NOW!!! And remember when you're reading Rhythm of War in a couple days time - Crem before cremlings.
  21. I'm pretty proud of Brandon. He used an actual swearword. That means that quoting an canonical actual line from one of his works will be censored on this website lol
  22. Hey sounds like we could use some of that in the real world amirite people? Ha!
  23. Well guys – we’ve just kept on rolling in our house. To be completely honest, I think that we’ve kept listening to the books together mainly because Tay slipped a disc in her back and so walking upstairs to our TV has been a bit of a mission, so staying downstairs and listening to Oathbringer has been a much less painful experience for her. SO! We decided to skip Soilencourager for the time being, just because Tay wanted more Kaladin/Dalinar/Shallan action – but mainly she found out that Pattern wasn’t in the novella and wasn’t super interested in it. So! Without further ado, I present to you Tay’s reactions to Oath…breaker! -- One of the first reactions she had was to question – “Why did the Parshendi use Szeth to kill Gavilar? They just happened to have a super-skilled assassin who could be a Surgebinder tagging along with them to the treaty meetings?” I was similarly perplexed. In Eshonai’s prologue perspective, she mentions Klade or another one of the Listener leaders being drawn to Szeth by a voice – are we all in agreement that this is Odium influencing the Listeners to Szeth to make sure that this budding future Bondsmith is killed? Or are there other theories as to why Szeth just happened to be around to be used by the Listeners to kill Gavilar? -- To test Tay’s understanding of the books the farther along we go, I asked her to describe what spren are. TAY: Okay Chris. I’m pretty connected to the matrix. I can tell you what spren are. A spren is a cute magical thing that appears out of nowhere and helps you. Like a stray puppy. It’s important to recognize, however, that when they’re cute magical beings they are sometimes gods. Or storms. Or lamps. ME: Lamps? TAY: Yeah, lamps. Like Navani traps them in things and makes them do stuff. Like be lamps. They also come from the magical bead place. ME: What’s that place called? TAY: Sssssssssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhh…adesmar? ME: Yes! TAY: Oh good. I really wanted to say “Shallandavar”. -- *After I mentioned some of the Radiant orders* TAY: Willshapers? Is that what they call a conveyancing attorney? Help you dissolve your estate? Ha! -- *Kaladin is on his way to Hearthstone* TAY: Press pause. There’s something I have to do. ME: *presses pause* TAY: *sings the entire song of “My Hometown” off of Bruce Springsteen’s classic 1984 album Born in the U.S.A. while imitating Bruce’s singing voice* -- Not really a specific quote, but when the “No Mating” scene showed up, Tay lost it. She is starting to feel feelings for Pattern usually only reserved for our cats and is now referring to Pattern as ‘my baby’. She loved when Shallan says something along the lines of “Well if you love Adolin so much why don’t you marry him?” and Pattern asks if that’s possible. I think she now likes Adolin enough that she’s fine if Pattern ditches Shallan to bond with Adolin. -- Just a point that we both loved: the scene where Adolin and Shallan practice with their Blades and Shallan just loves doing a thing that Adolin is obviously thrilled about. We realized that being with a person while they’re in their element (even if you don’t necessarily like it) is an important part of love, and something that just makes the relationship that much more special. For me, apparently, it’s whenever I get into some deep rugby analysis or I’m explaining an exciting historical event in great detail. Tay realized that this is why so many of her students love her while her colleagues think she’s just decent – her students are seeing her get animated and gushing about The Great Gatsby or Ulysses or A Thousand Splendid Suns while her colleagues are only getting to know her through faculty meetings and such. Really fun realization through this scene! -- She also kind of wants to use Dalinar’s takama belt anecdote in her classes now, but can’t quite figure out where to fit it. -- TAY: Elhokar? Aladar? Gavilar? Dalinar? Kalanor? Revolar? Mrazie, Graves, and Rayse? Why are all these names so similar?! Can’t the leader of the Ghostbloods just be named “Steve”? -- She got actual chills down her spine when Dalinar realized he heard Evi’s name. -- *Hears Urithiru named* TAY: Kind of sounds like ‘urethra’ and I can’t unhear it. -- *Taravangian and Dalinar talking about Nohadon’s dilemma in The Way of Kings* TAY: Taravangian, you’re heavy metal and I am here for it. Kill them all. -- *I point out that many names in Vorin society are palindromic* TAY: Hahaha. Brightlord Tacocat. -- *Tay is upset that Re-Shephir is not killed by Shallan* ME: Well she fled further into the mountain so she’s not a problem any more. TAY: Not a problem!? She’s still a problem! I’d be even more paranoid living in this place now. It’s like if we had confirmation that there were deadly toxic mushrooms in our house but we don’t know where they are. Would you call that ‘not a problem’? -- To finish things off: I’m quizzing Tay before each post to name the Orders of Radiants. Here’s how she did: TAY: Lightweavers. Windrunners. Bondsmiths. Oathbringers. Edgedancers. Skywalkers. Waterdancers. Oathbreakers. Windrunners. Light… weavers. Have I done that already? Dammit. -- That’s all for now folks! Crem before cremlings.
×
×
  • Create New...