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7/8/19 - M is for Monster - hawkedup - 2200 - LV
molah replied to hawkedup's topic in Reading Excuses
Same for me. I quite liked the beginning (although the lack of names was a bit off-putting), but as soon as Ker appeared... I lost all interest. Too heavy on the social commentary side for me. Some things that I noticed up till then: * M doesn't want to be called a monster, but in his head, up till then, he call himself monster * The first time the boy speaks feels like a "As you know, Bob" recap of what happened previously Other than that, I thought this was well executed. Prose-wise, I think it's solid. (as far as I can judge as a English non-native :)) -
My brother in law has the millennium falcon as well. It makes a really nice piece for a glass coffee table There a tons of people who've done that, according to google: https://www.google.com/search?q=millennium+falcon+coffee+table
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See you in a month
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Oh, thank you!
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I've got a new flash I'd like to run by you, but I guess I'll have to wait till the 17th.
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Now that I have the explanation, I like the idea of the caffeine. However, it sounded to me like the vampires needed the caffeine, not their victims for better blood-sucking. Regarding the vampire itself: I think it's alright to create a new type of vampire, but you need to make sure the reader understands that. There's so much history around vampires that we all have a preconceived idea of what a vampire is and what not. And actually, I don't think it matters whether M is a vampire or not. I think it's more important that the readers understands that C is now a powerful being as well, that they drink blood and that the caffeine helps with the drinking. By the way, to me it was quite clear that C still wanted to belong to the in-crowd and was still quite hurt of having been ousted.
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Hey Robinsky, First off, I really loved the voice. Like, I only wanted to continue reading because I found C to be very interesting and entertaining. The twist caught me off guard. I didn't expect something supernatural this far into the story. It was a great surprise, but I wasn't sure what to make of it. My first suspicion was that he was the devil, and I found that to be very cliché. But I wasn't really able to confirm that, so I'm not sure _what_ he is. And I kind of glazed over the coffee-power-pyramid stuff, because it didn't make any sense to me. So here I am now, not sure what just happened. The story ended with her being in again, and suddenly being the number 2? Because... why? And... what are they doing again? Not sure what to make of the ending, and therefore, what to make of the story as a whole. The ending kind of gave me a Limitless (https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Limitless_(film)) feeling. Cheers, Helge