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Mid-Range Game 28: Knives in the Dark


Elenion

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18 minutes ago, Madagascar said:

Liberate the means of production from the corrupt bourgeoisie!

Communism memespam! (memes shamelessly stolen from the internet)

We-must-seize-the-means-of-production.jp

xpost-from-r-fullcommunism-lets-seize-th

images?q=tbn:ANd9GcTmdjo9jpKfPPlhXzYcmzJ

Edited by Elenion
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6 hours ago, Droughtbringer said:

What?

Also, I've returned!

I slightly forgot this was going... (sorry)

I'm reading STINK's vote on me as a STINK vote... so not much from that.

Jondesu... I'm not certain about why, but apparently he trusts STINK, out of Hero and Madagascar, Hero seemed the most concerned about lynching me as it could cost us the game, so I'm inclined to trust him.

Madagascar

You know what you did! Don't play games with me, Drought. This was always going to happen, ever since you did that unspeakable horror.

Also @Jondesu oh wait did a mention and mobile can't delete mentions why is that a feature you know what I'm gonna ask that in the staff chat real quick

Aight gonna wait on a response for that.

Anyway, it seems that even Jon agrees that you deserve judgement for your heinous crimes, and I shall be the one to deliver it.

Unless my stomach acts up, then it'll probably be someone else. But for the most part, expect a vengeful Stink.

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14 hours ago, Jondesu said:

I've had several offers, and have considered them carefully.  Chouta seems to be a popular bargaining chip, unsurprisingly.  At this point, I'll cast my vote on Drought. I gotta give credit where credit is due, and the side that helped me the most is definitely a good side to help in return, especially if I want to be seen as a potential ally in future games.

I can't say anything about Hero, but I know that I am not evil, and I really don't want to die I ask you to reconsider; voting on me will not accomplish much, I have not even been active enough to be an eliminator, the past bit. (And no, I did not only send in orders and not say anything in the thread)

10 hours ago, Madagascar said:

Pah! So it comes to this. The chips are down, the masquerade is dropped, the character you forgot about in Act 1 suddenly emerges from backstage in Act 3 and turns out to have been both the murderer and your long lost identical twin from Paraguay all along. The pigs are sitting on the edge of their seats, both due to the dramatic nature of the situation and because pigs do not fit well in standard theater seats designed for human use. I wouldn't have it any other way.

Meaning I now have an excellent reason to advise we dry up Mr. Drought until he dies dramatically of dehydration as he is, like, clearly evil.

Yes, yes, I know dehydration is typically a long, slow death which not well suited to depiction on the stage in the typical sense, but I figure we can MacGyver a machine out of spare parts from the Kharbranth dump to do it right quick with the power of SCIENCE . Furthermore, his remains will be useful as theatrical props in my darlings' newest low-budget stage production (coming to a Kharbranth theater NEAR YOU this April!)

*hic*

This reads.... not village to me. It seems like you are trying to vote for me, but never actually saying why. If you are going to vote for me, could you at least give a better reason? If you make a good case for why I should be lynched that is one thing, but just lynching me like this is fairly suspicious, and is reinforcing my belief that we should vote on you.

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19 minutes ago, Droughtbringer said:

I can't say anything about Hero, but I know that I am not evil, and I really don't want to die I ask you to reconsider; voting on me will not accomplish much, I have not even been active enough to be an eliminator, the past bit. (And no, I did not only send in orders and not say anything in the thread)

This reads.... not village to me. It seems like you are trying to vote for me, but never actually saying why. If you are going to vote for me, could you at least give a better reason? If you make a good case for why I should be lynched that is one thing, but just lynching me like this is fairly suspicious, and is reinforcing my belief that we should vote on you.

At this point I'm pretty sure that Madagascar and STINK are both evil, and they've convinced Jondesu (who is neutral) to side with them. I could be wrong, but I doubt it. The fact that they're voting for you and not me is HIGHLY suspicious. With my track record this game and the way I've been playing, if I were another player who was villager I'd probably be voting for me right now. 

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14 minutes ago, Herowannabe said:

At this point I'm pretty sure that Madagascar and STINK are both evil, and they've convinced Jondesu (who is neutral) to side with them. I could be wrong, but I doubt it. The fact that they're voting for you and not me is HIGHLY suspicious. With my track record this game and the way I've been playing, if I were another player who was villager I'd probably be voting for me right now. 

Figured as much. Sorry I didn't show up earlier :/ I probably could have helped a bit earlier and the game may have gone the other way. 

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2 hours ago, Droughtbringer said:

This reads.... not village to me. It seems like you are trying to vote for me, but never actually saying why. If you are going to vote for me, could you at least give a better reason? If you make a good case for why I should be lynched that is one thing, but just lynching me like this is fairly suspicious, and is reinforcing my belief that we should vote on you.

2

That was a heavily Madagascar-inflected way of saying, "Hey, the guy who's disappeared for three days came back literally just in time to vote for me, well that's not suspicious at all <sarcastic>, so I'll vote for him out of self-preservation, petty revenge, and most importantly for DRAMA."

It's okay if you don't understand it. I understand my insistence on incorporating pigs and hiccups into literally everything I say may make me slightly harder to interpret at times, a self-imposed limitation I refuse to abandon out of principle even though it probably would have made a lot of things way, way easier. Heck, even people who know me to those who know me well, like these pigs, sometimes take a while to figure it out.

I will say that *hic* even if I were a citizen, Nabbers and you *hic* serendipitously returning at the last minute to vote for me would be highly, highly suspect to me and I would probably vote assuming the circumstances spoke for themselves. Chances are I'd be acting way more ridiculously incoherent than I am now, to be honest. That's really kinda how Mapadonet rolls -- on a wagon made of pigs.

But really that's all besides the point. You are obviously evil and you know what you did.

Liberte! Egalite! Fraternite!

Edited by Madagascar
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8 minutes ago, Madagascar said:

That was a heavily Madagascar-inflected way of saying, "Hey, the guy who's disappeared for three days came back literally just in time to vote for me, well that's not suspicious at all <sarcastic>, so I'll vote for him out of self-preservation, petty revenge, and most importantly for DRAMA."

It's okay if you don't understand it. I understand my insistence on incorporating pigs and hiccups into literally everything I say may make me slightly harder to interpret at times, a self-imposed limitation I refuse to abandon out of principle even though it probably would have made a lot of things way, way easier. Heck, even people who know me to those who know me well, like these pigs, sometimes take a while to figure it out.

I will say that *hic* even if I were a citizen, Nabbers and you *hic* serendipitously returning at the last minute to vote for me would be highly, highly suspect to me and I would probably vote assuming the circumstances spoke for themselves. Chances are I'd be acting way more ridiculously incoherent than I am now, to be honest. That's really kinda how Mapadonet rolls -- on a wagon made of pigs.

But really that's all besides the point. You are obviously evil and you know what you did.

Liberte! Egalite! Fraternite!

So if I take my vote off of you, you'll take your vote off of me?

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Probably not at this point, really, because pretty much all y'all gotta die, tragically, and as the 14th reincarnation of Napoleon Bonaparte, it is my patriotic duty to bring PIG JUSTICE unto the political criminal Nabbers with my bare hands for his crimes against piggery, leaving you as the only other option for the justice of the mob, because of all of those horrible things you did.

*Mapadonet's eyes cross and she leaps onto the podium in a straitjacket that she has resewn to look almost like an 18th-century French military uniform waving a rusty spoon like a cutlass*

VIVE LA *hiccup* KHABRANTH!

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7 minutes ago, Madagascar said:

Probably not at this point, really, because pretty much all y'all gotta die, tragically, and as the 14th reincarnation of Napoleon Bonaparte, it is my patriotic duty to bring PIG JUSTICE unto the political criminal Nabbers with my bare hands for his crimes against piggery, leaving you as the only other option for the justice of the mob, because of all of those horrible things you did.

*Mapadonet's eyes cross and she leaps onto the podium in a straitjacket that she has resewn to look almost like an 18th-century French military uniform waving a rusty spoon like a cutlass*

VIVE LA *hiccup* KHABRANTH!

So you're admitting to being an Elim? That's kinda what's implied by saying that I "have to die"
 

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5 minutes ago, Madagascar said:

Well, at least I'm not *hiccup hiccup* pure evil, like you!

*oink hic oink hic oink hic*

LIES! Of course she's evil! Who else would get mad at a guy for turning a fat, dirty pig into delicious bacon chouta? Pure evil. 

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You *hic* know what you did, Drought! The evidence for your crimes has been reviewed. You've been tried, convicted, and sentenced to death in absence for your terrible crimes by a fair, impartial jury *twelve pigs dressed in black jurists' robes waddle into the scene and start eating garbage* Your crimes, they are *hic* so horrible that no one who's seen the evidence can stomach to describe them. The pigs were traumatized for weeks. How could you be such a *hic* monster?

Nabbers, I *hic* don't have money, but I do have a very particular set of pigs. Pigs that make me a nightmare for people like you, that I have *hic* acquired over a long, illustrious career in psychiatry. If you let Plumpy go now, that'll be the end of it. But if you don't, they will come for you. They will find you. And they will *hic* kill you.

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2 minutes ago, Madagascar said:

Nabbers, I *hic* don't have money, but I do have a very particular set of pigs. Pigs that make me a nightmare for people like you, that I have *hic* acquired over a long, illustrious career in psychiatry. If you let Plumpy go now, that'll be the end of it. But if you don't, they will come for you. They will find you. And they will *hic* kill you.

Plumpy? I did let her go. Days ago. Sales were down, times were rough, I had to let her go. Hence her trip to the Reshi Aisles, which are totally real and not something I made up to divert you.

Or do you mean Rumpy? He's right over there. *Nabbers point at a rather sad looking pile of cloth that kinda resembles a pig in an oversized chouta costume.* He's still on the clock though so I'll have to kindly ask you to refrain from distracting him from doing his job. His shift ends in a few hours, right after the cycle ends. 

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“What? No!” *glances about nervously* “That wasn’t Plumpy’s tail, that was.... uh... well yeah, it was Plumpy’s tail. She... uh... got it surgically removed before heading on vacation. All the cool pigs are going tailless these days. Ain’t that right Rumpy?”

*A muffled “oink” emanates from the mound of chouta-colored canvas.*

”There ya go, see? Nothing to be worried about. Here, why don’t you have another bacon chouta. On the house.” ;)

Edited by Herowannabe
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I ... I smell a rat here ... I don't mean in this chouta ... in the sense that everything you say is riddled with lies, horrible lies! And also maybe in the chouta! Look, I'm gonna have to confiscate this and your entire chouta stand for forens*hic* testing, Nabbers! I'm saying this as a totally legitimate psychiatrist who also happens to be in charge of Kharbranth's health inspection office!

Edited by Madagascar
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1 minute ago, Madagascar said:

I ... I smell a rat here ... I don't mean in this chouta ... in the sense that everything you say is riddled with lies, horrible lies! And also maybe in the chouta! Look, I'm gonna have to confiscate this and your entire chouta stand for forens*hic* testing, Nabbers! I'm saying this as a totally legitimate psychiatrist who also happens to be in charge of Kharbranth's health inspection office!

Pssh, you're not taking my chouta cart! At least not until you pay me for the *checks ledger* 51 choutas on your tab. 

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No, no, liberate the means of production to um, preserve the dignity of ... the ... prol ... prol ... I can't remember nuffin. But look it's all, like, totally for a noble idealistic reason, not because I'm a crazy *hic* person who is clearly not actually a legitimate medical professional of any kind who is trying to get out of paying her tab on the chouta cart.

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6 minutes ago, Herowannabe said:

This game right now:

tenor.gif?itemid=5075291

 

I know, right? It really is something.

The pigs are all right. Just very hungry. Nabbers and I have been wrestling in the mud over this piece of chouta, which has remained miraculously unstained, for the past several hours. He wants to sell it and I want to give it a proper burial. I suppose we'll find out what its fate is soon.

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After six days of death and terror, only five men remained. Div, Droughtbringer, Trumpet Guy, Mad Mapadonet, and Nabbers.

“I think I’ve been absent from my stand chouta stand for long enough,” said Nabbers, “lost time is lost business, after all. Good night, and I hope that we catch the last of the Inmates tomorrow.”

He strode away, whistling a Herdazian tune to himself.

“BWOOT! Droughtbringer, I challenge you to a duel to the death!” announced Trumpet Guy.

Drought snored. It seemed that Ecthelion had somehow passed on his ability to sleep through life-and-death situations.

“I guess that means no.” Madaponet chuckled.

“Stand and fight, you coward! BWOOT! Face me like a man!”

And suddenly Droughtbringer was awake. “Why are you doing this? Can’t you see that Madaponet is a murderer?”

“I can see that very well,” said Trumpet Guy.

A look of realization dawned over Droughtbringer’s face. Both drew swords and charged each other, meeting in the middle with a clash that shot sparks into both of their faces. They kept their swords together, each attempting to use their weight to push the other off balance. With a grunt, Trumpet Guy proved the stronger, pushing Droughtbringer backwards a step and following with a pair of frenzied, slashing attacks. These Droughtbringer parried, but he had no time to counterattack. Droughtbringer stepped backward, recentering his footing, and blocked another strike from Trumpet Guy and responding with one of his own that forced Trumpet Guy to disengage.

“We’re even, Trumpet Guy. I can see it, you can see it. Why do we not both go in peace?”

“This feud between us has to end, Drought. BWOOT!”

He accompanied this blow of the trumpet with an off-handed stab that caught Droughtbringer in the left shoulder. Blood ran down Droughtbringer’s chest. Droughtbringer used his good shoulder to take a swing at Trumpet Guy, but as he swung the sword back to a ready position he felt something grab his arm. Div had crept up behind him and grabbed his good arm, pinning it behind his back.

“Is there no honor in you, Trumpet--hic--Guy? To challenge a man to a duel only to have one of your goons intervene?”

“There is no such--hic--thing as honor in a feud, Droughtbringer. There is only victory, or death. BWOOT!”

Trumpet Guy set his trumpet aside and brought his sword down in a two-handed blow.

*****

“So, this is your devious plan, Mapadonet?” said Div.

They were in a back alley, not far from the mental hospital where Mapadonet had once served as a psychiatrist, before she cracked and helped two other prisoners escape.

“No, our plan was a little more simple than that. Hic--kill everyone. This was just our way of passing the time.”

She gestured to an old chull-cart that had been crudely but painstakingly modified. In the place of the chull harness were two lines of ropes, each fitted to five harnesses that were each attached to a large pig. Think of a rickety dog-cart, pulled by some very porky dogs.

“Mapadonet, you’re mad,” said Div, “Is this thing even safe to ride?”

“Perfectly--hic--safe!” chipped in Trumpet Guy.

“You’re not so sane yourself, Crazy Ivan,” said Mapadonet.

Div raised an eyebrow. He wasn’t accustomed to being called his real name, but he was in good company now. A half-mad psychiatrist, the politician she had driven insane, and Crazy Ivan. It was almost poetic.

“I’m in,” Div finally said, “now where are we going?”

“Don’t worry about that. I’m driving,” said Mapadonet, “My pigs won’t listen to anybody except--hic--me. There’s room in the cart for two.”

Trumpet Guy hopped in the back and extended a hand to Div, who took it. After Div was fully seated, Trumpet Guy shoved Madaponet’s crossbow into his lap.

“What am I going to need this for?”

“BWOOT! Well I can’t hold use it with this trumpet in my hands!”

“Well why do you need the--hic--trumpet?” Div interjected.

“It’s for effect! BWOOT!”

“It won’t be for long, Div. There’s only one more stop--hic--left. Hyah!”

Madaponet snapped the reins and they were off.

*****

Rumpy oinked nervously.

Ever since Plumpy has been “laid off” Rumpy had been fearful for her life, and her boss’s behavior over the past few days had not done anything to sooth her fears.

After shutting down the Chouta stand in a fit of rage the other day, Nabbers had dragged his cart into a small, dead-end alley and had hung some blankets over the entrance for privacy. Since then he had been frantically making chouta after chouta. He had used up all of their supplies, had spent all of his spheres buying more supplies and had used those up, too, until he had piles and piles of chouta.

Now he was busy stuffing it all into sacks, backpacks, his pockets- anything he could use to carry them. He glanced over and noticed Rumpy staring at him.

“You’re wondering what I’m doing, aren’t you.”

“Oink.”

“I’m stuffing all this chouta into sacks. Obviously.”

“Oink.”

“‘Why am I stuffing chouta into sacks?’ You say?”

“Oink oink-oink grunt oinky oink.”

“Yeah.... I really have no clue what your saying, so I’m going to pretend you asked me why I’m stuffing chouta into sacks.”

Nabbers paused to cinch the last sack closed and sling it over his shoulder. He grabbed a chouta wrap in each hand and stood up. “Fun chouta fact that a lotta people don’t know about,” Nabbers said, striking a pose at the mouth of the alleyway. “Chouta is highly flammable.”

With that he struck the sparkflickers he wore on each hand, igniting the choutas he held like a couple of bacon-scented Molotov cocktails.

“Come on Rumpy. We’re getting chouta here before it’s too late.”

*long pause*

“Get it? It’s a chouta pun.”

“Oink.”

“Right, let’s go!”

Just then, a booming sound blasted through the mists.

“BWOOT! Move aside! The Escaped Inmates are coming through! BWOOT!”

What the storms? Nabbers’ left eyebrow raised so high it nearly joined his hairline. He had spent the last six days desperately hunting for the Escaped Inmates, and now on the seventh day they had delivered themselves up! He couldn’t believe it.

Something large and wooden came careening out of the night-mist, smacking Nabbers onto his back. The chouta sacks spilled out of his hands and onto the ground, where a gang of pigs--where had they come from?--began slurping up the unexpected feast.

“BWOOT! The Escaped Inmates are taking a--hic--snack break!”

That snapped Nabbers out of his stunned surprise. “First Mapadonet, and now you too, Trumpet Guy?”

“And me.” chimed in Div as he pulled the trigger of the crossbow. Nabbers, attempting to get up, was thrown back to the ground by the momentum of the crossbow bolt. He landed next to the swarm of pigs that continued to forage the fallen chouta. Madaponet snapped the reins, and the pigs reluctantly left their feast and assembled into a riding formation.

“BWOOT! The Escaped Inmates are leaving the city! BWOOT!”

“And free--hic--chouta for all!”

*****

King Taravangian set down his test paper and sighed. He didn’t need the test results to know that it was a below-average day for him. At least he knew he was stupid today; it was the days that he didn’t feel stupid that he had to be concerned about.

“My lord,” an assistant said, after the test results confirmed what Taravangian already knew, “I have a memo from the captain of the city guard.”

“Let me see it.”

City is in utter disarray. Mysterious hiccupping disease is running rampant. Most of our populace has been exposed to it. Escapees from mental institution have been seen causing mayhem. Fires have broken out in the market district; sabotage is suspected. Forensics department has traced multiple murders to a woman named Madaponet, ex-psychiatrist at one of our mental hospitals, and to Alethi Highlord Locke Tekiel, believed to be a member of a powerful insurgent group. Situation deteriorating. Hospitals are flooded with the hiccupping sick. Over 15 homicides have been reported in the last week. Street sweepers have gone on strike demanding a safer city at night. Madaponet and her supporters are believed to have caused thousands of spheres worth of damage. Units sent to retrieve Tekiel have not returned. There are unconfirmed reports of proletarians attempting to seize the means of production. City Guard is spread too thin to respond to all incidents. We request immediate reinforcements and martial law to be declared.

“What shall we do?” said the assistant.

Taravangian shook his head. It hurt just to think of what to do.

“My lord?”

Taravangian hiccupped.

 

Vote tally:

Droughtbringer (3): STINK, Jondesu, Madagascar

Madagascar (2): Herowannabe, Droughtbringer

 

Droughtbringer was lynched! They were a Scholar allied with the Kharbranth Citizens!

Herowannabe was killed! They were a Scholar allied with the Kharbranth Citizens!

Psychiatrist: You begin the game with an extra life. In addition, you may use your action to drive a player insane, granting them your win condition and adding them to this doc. Some players may be psychologically stable and immune to this action. After you successfully drive a player insane, you cannot use this ability again.

Crazy Ivan:

     Mad Plans: (passive) Due to your inscrutable motives, when you die the write-up will contain your role and alignment, but not your role abilities.

     The Carrier: (passive) You begin the game with Hiccuping Disease, a diabolical bacterium that you have created that gives all of those that you infect the hiccups. At the end of each cycle, every player who has a vote on someone with Hiccuping Disease will contract the disease. The disease has no other in-game effects.

     Revenge: Your win condition is to, at any point in the game, have all living players infected with Hiccuping Disease. You can still win after you are dead, even if you had not won by the time you died.

 

The game is over! The Escaped Inmates, the Skybreakers, and Crazy Ivan have won!

Spectator Doc

Dead Doc

Escaped Inmates Doc

Skybreakers Doc

Crazy Ivan’s Plotting Doc

GM Spreadsheet

 

Final player list:

Spoiler

1. Walin: Nalter, a tastespren scholar Kharbranth Citizens Politician
2. Jondesu: Div Crazy Ivan
3. Devotary of Spontaneity: Akhanaka, a fearless ardent Kharbranth Citizens Scholar
4. Eternum: Aiden Kharbranth Citizens Private Detective
5. Kynedath: Lo-Kag, third Horneater son Escaped Inmates Proto-Bondsmith
6. LivingLegend: Lej'elin, a teen disgusted with the Alethi for good reason Kharbranth Citizens Private Detective
7. Droughtbringer Kharbranth Citizens Scholar
8. Orlok: Highlord Locke Tekiel Skybreakers Nale, Herald of Justice
9. STINK: Trumpet Guy, BWOOT Escaped Inmates Politician (formerly Kharbranth Citizens)
10. Madagascar: "Mad" Mapadonet, a famous pig researcher. Escaped Inmates Psychiatrist
11. Stick: Stick, a sticky stick Skybreakers Skybreaker Apprentice
12. Amanuensis: Ana Lyst Skybreakers Skybreaker Apprentice
13. Drake Marshall: Ev Escaped Inmates Proto-Lightweaver
14. Fifth Scholar: Nolan Kharbranth Citizens Lift 
15. Herowannabe: Nabbers, a Herdazian chouta street vendor Kharbranth Citizens Scholar
16. Coop772 Kharbranth Citizens Scholar
17. Ecthelion III Kharbranth Citizens The Undertaker
18. Steeldancer Kharbranth Citizens Scholar
19. Lady of Chaos Kharbranth Citizens Proto-Windrunner

Thanks go to Hero for the portion of the write-up from Rumpy to the chouta joke, and for the title. My game and balance thoughts should be up by tomorrow. Thank you all for playing!

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