Robinski Posted September 17, 2016 Report Share Posted September 17, 2016 On 15 September 2016 at 3:43 PM, kaisa said: If people are adults at 16 in your world, then he is a man. But @Ernei said he was 15, not 16, so not yet a man. This is why we have the words 'adolescent' and 'teenager'. In my book, young man strikes the right note, but you don't want to be saying young man all the time, as that will be repetitive. You can alternate that with his name, of course. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
neongrey Posted September 17, 2016 Report Share Posted September 17, 2016 I'd advise against it; it's generally a hallmark of poor-quality writing, that sort of epithet. I'd work the name in sooner somehow, rather than dance around it, then. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
neongrey Posted September 17, 2016 Report Share Posted September 17, 2016 Doing that sounds way more unnatural to me than just navigating the conversation to a name earlier, honestly. That's one of those things that would probably make me just drop a book cold. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Robinski Posted September 18, 2016 Report Share Posted September 18, 2016 Does the second character know his name, and just isn't using it? That would seem strange. I find that names are often overused. If there are only two characters, one male, one female, in the scene, then referring to the young man as 'he' for a good portion of the pages and 'young man' when you feel you need a reminder, would go a reasonably long way, I think. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
neongrey Posted September 18, 2016 Report Share Posted September 18, 2016 Ughhh I have no time to do anything at all this week, let alone read or write. I'm gonna try and play catch-up on people's stuff from this past week but if I haven't gotten to you yet that's why. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mandamon Posted September 25, 2016 Report Share Posted September 25, 2016 I'm back from the WX16 cruise and trying to figure out what I'm doing again! Had an awesome time, got to meet more cool writers and old friends from last year, talk with the podcast crew again, sit in on WX recording sessions for the rest of this year, and got to meet an agent and an editor. They had a whole lot more diversity-centered programming this year, which was very helpful, and I got to attend a "writing the other" class which will be very helpful for the current work I'm finishing up. The focus was a lot more on the publishing side this time, and many of us got have our pitches critiqued by the agent who attended. There's a lot more stuff that happened, including being on one of the largest cruise ships in the world! I may or may not be critiquing again this coming week, depending on how much work I need to catch up on, so apologies if I'm still scarce. I'll be putting together a blog post soon with my thoughts on the cruise, as I get them in order. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Hobbit Posted September 25, 2016 Report Share Posted September 25, 2016 8 hours ago, Mandamon said: I'm back from the WX16 cruise and trying to figure out what I'm doing again! Had an awesome time, got to meet more cool writers and old friends from last year, talk with the podcast crew again, sit in on WX recording sessions for the rest of this year, and got to meet an agent and an editor. They had a whole lot more diversity-centered programming this year, which was very helpful, and I got to attend a "writing the other" class which will be very helpful for the current work I'm finishing up. The focus was a lot more on the publishing side this time, and many of us got have our pitches critiqued by the agent who attended. There's a lot more stuff that happened, including being on one of the largest cruise ships in the world! You are so cool. I got to do something cool this weekend. I went to the National Book Festival in DC! I went to panels and saw Shannon Hale, Elizabeth Hand, Hannah Pittard, Patrick Ness, and Katherine Patterson. And I got two books signed! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kais Posted September 26, 2016 Report Share Posted September 26, 2016 If you ever wanted to know the difference between editor feedback on a book you've been subbing and refining for a year (and had numerous R&Rs) versus one that's been through light beta work only, it's... it's significant. It's significant at P<0.0001 and holy wah I may never leave my computer again. Just wanted to share. ASD - time to take you apart and make you better, faster, stronger. 4 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Robinski Posted September 26, 2016 Report Share Posted September 26, 2016 5 hours ago, kaisa said: If you ever wanted to know the difference between editor feedback on a book you've been subbing and refining for a year (and had numerous R&Rs) versus one that's been through light beta work only, it's... it's significant. It's significant at P<0.0001 and holy wah I may never leave my computer again. Just wanted to share. ASD - time to take you apart and make you better, faster, stronger. Difficult second album syndrome, prep time reduced by a factor of at least ten!!! 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Robinski Posted September 26, 2016 Report Share Posted September 26, 2016 Yikes @Ernei, don't sacrifice the messenger!! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Robinski Posted September 26, 2016 Report Share Posted September 26, 2016 1 minute ago, Ernei said: Nah, I meant it that it's easier to distance oneself and don't take things too much to heart XD I'm looking forward to reading your next submission. Is it the one about the girl Cassie who can draw the future, that you mentioned in Alpha Readers? That sounds really interesting. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mandamon Posted September 26, 2016 Report Share Posted September 26, 2016 14 hours ago, Hobbit said: You are so cool. I got to do something cool this weekend. I went to the National Book Festival in DC! I went to panels and saw Shannon Hale, Elizabeth Hand, Hannah Pittard, Patrick Ness, and Katherine Patterson. And I got two books signed! Awesome! The more I do writerly things, the more I find networking is really the best option in getting into the market. Get to know agents and writers as people--ask what they're interested in. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mandamon Posted September 26, 2016 Report Share Posted September 26, 2016 11 hours ago, kaisa said: If you ever wanted to know the difference between editor feedback on a book you've been subbing and refining for a year (and had numerous R&Rs) versus one that's been through light beta work only, it's... it's significant. It's significant at P<0.0001 and holy wah I may never leave my computer again. Just wanted to share. ASD - time to take you apart and make you better, faster, stronger. We got a class on the cruise about how editors work with writers on books slated for publication, courtesy of Navah Wolfe. Very eye opening at how involved they are in the story! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kais Posted September 27, 2016 Report Share Posted September 27, 2016 11 hours ago, Mandamon said: Very eye opening at how involved they are in the story! OMG yes. Editors are amazing and do an insane amount of work! Having a good fit for an editor is important as well for sure. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kais Posted September 27, 2016 Report Share Posted September 27, 2016 I'd call the people Sinchan. Best not to use a current nationality in a name. 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Eagle of the Forest Path Posted September 27, 2016 Report Share Posted September 27, 2016 You could also try either Shin or Chi, with the reasoning that the other syllable just means "land" (or possibly "land of"). 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Vreeah Posted September 27, 2016 Report Share Posted September 27, 2016 US of America (American) - France (French) - Argentina (Argentine) - Mitanni (Mitanni, though the people were also Hurrians) - Britain (British) - China (Chinese) Shinchian - Shench - Shinchine - Shinchi - Shinchish - Shinese 1 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mandamon Posted September 28, 2016 Report Share Posted September 28, 2016 Hey folks, if you are interested in the Writing Excuses retreat and cruise, I just put up a blog post about my experience this year. They'll be making the announcement about the one in 2017 before too long. It's a great chance to develop as a writer and get to know a lot of industry professionals. 2 Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
neongrey Posted September 28, 2016 Report Share Posted September 28, 2016 Honestly (and I'm not ragging on you at all here for being able to go), it's really sort disheartening to see this sort of event held up as The Thing To Do (ditto with cons for preliminary networking). It's a pretty inherently exclusionary sort of event, limited to people who either have a certain amount of disposable income or the means to get together a pretty substantial amount of money, and afford the time off work for it. They set up a good rate for it but even then, it's not an insignificant cost at all. Now, these are barriers that aren't as strict as they once were, the internet being a a fantastic tool that it is, but there's still a lot of emphasis on this sort of face to face thing, and it's... I can barely even afford to go walk around local cons for fun, and I can't afford to take time off for them, so if it doesn't fall into a time when I'm naturally off work, I don't even get that. Lots of people don't even have that much access, either cost or by location. So the notion of something like a (foreign!) cruise...The sheer amount of who-you-know-in-person... ugh. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
krystalynn03 Posted September 28, 2016 Report Share Posted September 28, 2016 7 hours ago, Mandamon said: Hey folks, if you are interested in the Writing Excuses retreat and cruise, I just put up a blog post about my experience this year. They'll be making the announcement about the one in 2017 before too long. It's a great chance to develop as a writer and get to know a lot of industry professionals. I look forward to reading your post! I hope I can learn something new from what you shared! Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mandamon Posted September 29, 2016 Report Share Posted September 29, 2016 5 hours ago, krystalynn03 said: I look forward to reading your post! I hope I can learn something new from what you shared! Thanks! 6 hours ago, neongrey said: It's a pretty inherently exclusionary sort of event, limited to people who either have a certain amount of disposable income or the means to get together a pretty substantial amount of money I agree. That's why there are scholarships, and why the alumni set up our own scholarship to pay it forward and help others get to go as well. Obviously the spots are limited, but the alums are doing a lot to try to send more people next year. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
neongrey Posted September 29, 2016 Report Share Posted September 29, 2016 (edited) Yeah, and I know it's something they're aware of and do their best to deal with, it's just, augh. e: like, a scholarship isn't going to make someone able to afford to take time off, and isn't going to cover things like flights, (I wouldn't think). It's not nearly as bad as something like Clarion, but it's frustrating to see so much weight being placed on things like this which are so very non-trivial. Edited September 29, 2016 by neongrey Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Mandamon Posted September 29, 2016 Report Share Posted September 29, 2016 Yeah, it's definitely a problem for those without extra income. Just to let you know, the scholarship does include flights and a daily stipend for food. I think the flight allowance was $500 this year. Not sure what it will be next year. The time off cost/benefit is still a challenge, of course. A lot of people I talked to were making it their one big trip of the year, and planned to try for it every other year or so, depending on income. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
neongrey Posted September 29, 2016 Report Share Posted September 29, 2016 That's cool, then yeah, about the scholarship (though I have mixed feelings about having more disposable income essentially creating a lower bar to entry, but that's far from unique to something like this). I'm not against the idea of retreats or events like that, just the weight they're given. I just know I don't even get one big trip of the year, and I'm far from alone on that. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
kais Posted October 1, 2016 Report Share Posted October 1, 2016 I just wish the RE thing wasn't on a boat. I'd love to go, but I don't do boats. Starships, yes. Boats, no. Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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