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Dark Alley - Non-Hemalurgic Research Division


ostrichofevil

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It has come to my attention that the other Denizens' and my creation, sale, and use of Hemalurgic cookies has upset many people, including the Anti-Bakery, Light Alley, and Mediocrely Lit Alleys. Also, I believe that we (the Dark Alley) need to broaden our horizons. For those reasons, I am starting the Non-Hemalurgic Research Division (NHRD) of the Dark Alley, which will specialize in, well, non-Hemalurgic Research. We will no longer just bake cookies; we will rise up and bake Metalmind Muffins, Stormlight Soufflé, and other tasty Investiture delights!

 

Since this is a sub-group of the Dark Alley, all NHRD members must be Dark Alley members. (Which means that if you want to join, ask in the main DA thread.) However, non Dark Alley members may also help out with our Research, and need not fear spontaneous use of Cookies. In fact, we will limit ourselves to ethical Research in this thread, so morality advocates are welcome.

 

Member List:

Ostrichofevil - Maleril Ostrir Chalev Tekel - Head Non-Metallic/non-Hemalurgic Researcher, and lowly Denizen of the Dark Alley.

Morzathoth - Biochroma Specialist

Screwloose - Research Assistant

IrulelikeSTIK - Research Assistant

Kipper - Resident Forger

Glossary:

Feruchemical Unit (FU) - The NHRD's unit of Feruchemical charge.  One FU is the amount of Feruchemy needed to double a quality for one minute.

 

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Bakery

 

Here you can find information on our bakery. You may order items from the menu on this thread. We also take custom orders, which will probably be added to the menu.

 

Menu:

Metalmind Muffins - (57.34 + 24i) per 2400

Stormlight Souffle -10.95

BioChromatic Breath-mint- 1.8 cents per Breath-mint

BioChromatic Brioche - 40.25

Allomantic Aioli - 0x3.243F6 per pound

Metalmind Mints - 1.23 per .2 FU mint

Compounding Cake - 423.45

Investiture Ice Cream - 2.37 + 2.57i for one scoop.

Sygaldry Sorbet - Five talents

Sympathy Soup - Twelve talents

Forgery Frappe - Four pounds of soulstone

True Source Tiramisu - 8.12

Payment Methods:

  • Cash
  • Filled Metalminds
  • Credit/Debit
  • Investiture
  • Shardblades
  • Bitcoin
  • Your Eternal Soul
  • Upvotes

Note that upvotes are the preferred method of payment.

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Note: This sub-group is approved by Voidus, effective leader of the Dark Alley, and is an official division of the Alley.

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Oh, other investiture delights, eh? Wonderful! I'll have a double feruchemy/stormlight cake, please! And a BioChromatic Breathmint on the side, please!

 

Coming right up.  In your cake, would you like Chocolate (Copper), Vanilla (Steel), or another flavor?  And how many Breaths would you like in your Breathmint?

 

Also, would you like to join as a Research Helper?

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Coming right up.  In your cake, would you like Chocolate (Copper), Vanilla (Steel), or another flavor?  And how many Breaths would you like in your Breathmint?

 

Also, would you like to join as a Research Helper?

Hmm.... Let's see. Copper seems good, and i'd like about 500 breaths in that Breathmint, please.

 

And as for the Research Helper offer, I'll have to consider that.

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Will there be any Metalmind Mints? With the slow release of the investiture in a metalmind rather than the sudden burst of taste that one would get from a muffin?

Good idea.  It would be nice to eat a speed-mint before an athletic competition…

 

Well metalminds do empty quicker than they fill up :P

No they don't; it's equal.  If you spend five minutes halving your weight, then you can spend five minutes doubling your weight.

 

Well, CadmiumMuffins just leave you hungry for more.

 

:lol:

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