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ICanDream

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  1. Sorry can’t submit. My computer is so broken I need to get a new one so that may throw a wrench in things. I’m away so that may limit my ability to critique other people’s work... so that’s a problem. sorry
  2. Sorry everyone. i can’t submit (again!) this Monday due to technical difficulties.
  3. Sorry for leaving it so late but I will not be able to post this Monday. I will, however, be able to next Monday, so, provided there’s space, I’ll post then
  4. Hey I’d like to submit next Monday, provided there’s space. Sorry for my long absence. I stopped writing for a while after getting disheartened when I realised how fundamentally broken a novel is been working in was. But I’m proud to say that I’m back, baby! So... er yeah. I’m back, hopefully to stay
  5. It’s been a while since I’ve done a critique - or even been on 17th Shard for that matter - but I thought I’d give this a try. I think it’s got the beginnings of something great. It made me want to learn more and that’s great. However, the beginning involves far too much exposition. There’s nothing happening, no characters to latch onto and that means that it’s boring and lacks a real hook to draw readers in. I have often made this same mistake; exposition is the kind of thing that as a writer you love, but as a reader you hate. I also think the opening paragraphs are a bit jarring, jumping from one subject to another with only the vaguest links. This stood out most in the paragraph opening with a line about struggle. I’d like to say that I love the idea of Trash Island. It’s cool and clearly has a history. But don’t info-dump; ease the facts the reader needs to know through the text and that will make it read better, and make it more concise. This critique sounds overly negative and I really didn’t mean that. I love the idea and would love for you to submit the next part for critique next. EDIT: Just saw your comment on the opening exposition and how you tried to make it interesting and everything. I can see that you’ve done that, and I’ll admit, it was good exposition, but if you want to open with exposition, it has to be so incredibly god damnation interesting that it’s close to impossible to pull off. So...yeah
  6. I thought it would be a good idea to try and compile a list of all the antagonists for book 4 and predictions about what they will do. So, we have, as antagonists: Odium Moash The Unmade Taravangian (probably) The Fused Ialai Ghostbloods (in a way) I’ll edit the list to include any others that I remember, when I remember them. So some predictions. I believe Kaladin will be guarding one of the Heralds - probably Taln - and Moash is sent to kill the Herald. Kaladin and Moash will have a confrontation and it will be intense. I also think that there is more to Taravangian. I’ll personally be very disappointed if he just falls to Odium, as is implied at the end of OB. Finally, I predict that Ba-Ado-Mishram will make an appearance and be the primary antagonist of the book. So what are your predictions and who are the antagonists I missed?
  7. Who’s your favourite of the three main POV characters. Yes, I know there are more than three, but I’m talking about the the three who have featured most heavily in the Stormlight Archive so far: Kaladin, Shallan and Dalinar. For me, it is probably Kaladin - and it will probably be Kaladin for many others as well. He’s definitely the most relateable and his story really resonates with those who have suffered with depression. However, after OB Dalinar is a serious contender for my favourite character, with his turmoil really making the book for me. I really enjoy Shallan - I especially loved her in WoR - but she really can’t compete against the other two.
  8. How would you rank the first Mistborn trilogy? My personal ranking would be The Final Empire > Well of Ascension > Hero of Ages The Final Empire was a great book about loss, triumph and friendship. Vin progressed from a timid girl to a powerful Mistborn and Kelsier was absolutely incredible. There are many interesting characters, and the book is tight and intense. Kelsier’s death was incredibly powerful and the Lord Ruler intimidating. The book ended in a beautifully satisfying way, while still leaving story threads open for the next book. The Well of Ascension was a good book. The characters continued to be good, and many developed further from the first book in exciting ways. But the lack of Kelsier was tragic. Still, the plot was good and there was a real desperation and tension. However, this book was paced badly and for a long time it seems to drag along. The ending managed to bring back the previous book’s fast pace though and imo redeemed the book. The Hero of Ages was... alright, I guess. The characters (except for Spook and Sazed) weren’t quite as compelling as in previous books, and I didn’t enjoy the villain as much as the previous ones. I didn’t enjoy the Kandra plot line and the book’s avalanche was the least emotional of Sanderson’s. I felt nothing when Elend died, and when Vin died I was a bit disheartened but not distraught as I would expect. So that’s my ranking. What’s yours?
  9. With all the appreciation threads, I feel it is only natural to have a disdain thread. And who is worse than our utterly irredeemable, utterly reprehensible and dishonourable least-favourite character - Moash. As Reddit so eloquently put it: **** Moash. I will begin the hate thread with a haiku. Moash storm off please, You deserve eternal torture, For Elhokar’s murder. And here is a Ketek Storming Moash, eternally dishonourable, eternally storms Moash.
  10. I like Mistborn. I don’t love it, but I like it. The first book was good. The plot moved on quickly, Kelsier was an incredible character, and Vin progressed more in this book than the rest of the series. The world was also new so we were plunged into this incredible new environment. Ellend was also witty and at his best. And the ending was good - not unexpected, but good. A solid four stars. WoA dragged but it had incredible moments. Staff was a compellingly evil villain, and his dynamic with Ellend was good. The ending was emotional and was great. I remember finishing this book and looking at reviews for HoA. And one thing kept being repeated: the fact that HoA had a great ending - way better than the previous books. So I dived into HoA expecting the best. I enjoyed the non-ending section. It was, on average, as good as Well of Ascension. The n I reached the climax and... meh. It was alright but was far less satisfying than the previous books, which both had stronger endings. This was made worse by the fact that I had hyped up the ending for myself. I think Stormlight probably spoiled me - I was used to those incredible endings so I was expecting something nearly as good as that. Am I missing something? If so, tell me what.
  11. The desolation has come! Humans fight voidbringers! But how many voidbringers soldiers are there? There were reputedly “tens of thousands” of parshman laying siege to Kholinar during Part Three and the fleet at the Battle of Thaylen Field seemed impressive. But how big were they, exactly? I would put all the voidbringer numbers to around 100,000 based on given numbers and in-world descriptions, as well as my own assumptions here and there. But there should be many more than this. That fact leads us to a second, more important question: where are the other voidbringers. During Dalinar’s trip to Azir (I don’t have the book on me, so go ahead and call me out on any inaccuracies) the voidbringers are gone, leading to an economic disaster. They aren’t described as simply not working the fields, they’re said to have left. So where have they gone? One answer could be Kholinar or Marat. But there doesn’t seem to be multiple countries-worth of parshman at either of their locations, with numbers in the tens of thousands. So where? Iri? That certainly seems plausible, considering that they are under Odium’s control. But why would they be there if Iri has seceded to the voidbringers? They aren’t putting up a fight. There is no point in going. Althekar? All the voidbringers have left Alethkar, or are in Kholinar. So where are they going? I believe Brandon is setting up something. I don’t know what, but the voidbringers are somewhere, out there, doing something. My guess? Aimia. Brandon has built up this mysterious place for three books, with even an interlude there, and an interlude from an Aimian themself. For now, this only a wild theory, but there you go. Something is going on with Aimia, so could this be linked to it? Also, Shinovar. The shin have many honourblades and to steal them would be to cripple humanity. It could be linked to Moash and his murder of Jezrien. Will he do the same to other heralds and take the honourblades? Fell free to pick this apart. And if you have any numbers about the voidbringer army, please share them.
  12. Now that we’ve had some time to mull over our opinions for this heft tome, I thought we’d have another thread about our reviews for the book. I feel like last time we were just wallowing in the ecstasy of a Stormlight release and it was hard to give it an honest review, so yeah... here is a thread to post your honest review about this book and how it stacks up to the rest. So what did I think of it? I, personally, loved it. Of course, it didn’t quite match the WoR - which remains, IMO, the greatest book ever written - but it did read incredibly well, and I enjoyed it tremendously. There were many things this book did well, and I’m going to go into them: Firstly, Dalinar. Before he was a compelling character, but he, at least in my eyes, had always la led that incredible emotional grounding of Kaladin or the weirdness of Shallan. But in this book... wow, he gave Kaladin a run for his money in who I consider the most compelling of the main three. The whole end sequence with him was phenomenal and heart-wrenching, and his flashbacks were in stark contrast to the man who he is now. In reading those flashbacks, you gain a greater appreciation of the man Dalinar has become. Secondly, the Avalanche. Masterfully written. I found myself emotionally drained after reading it. I felt hope, despair, sympathy, anger, wonder, awe and joy tempered with melancholy (that came out way more poetic than I had intended). This was a great ending. End of. Thirdly, the climax to Part Three. Wow. So what happened at the end of Part Three? I’ll tell you. Dalinar receives another flashback, this one taking him back to when he killed Evi. That alone was emotional. But it didn’t stop there. We got an action sequence with the fused involved which was terrifying. Then we had the chapter “The Girl Who Stood Up”. Then we had Elhokar’s death, as well as the death as many others that Kaladin had cared about. We had Kaladin freeze. Then we got a pulse pounding battle. And then it all ended on a cliffhanger - with everyone in Shadesmar. It’s easy to see why I liked this. Fourthly, all the other good stuff. I include in this section: Kaladin - his arc was incredible and struck a cord with me - Shallan - her arc was emotional and I (controversially) absolutely loved it - the world building - I mean it’s as good as the previous books so yeah, it’s good - and finally I was never back red. That’s high praise for a book this long. Now the stuff I didn’t like: The way Amaram was handled. His final scene where he turned into Yelig-Nar was great, but his character had so much more potential. Of course, it didn’t come to fruition. The whole Sadeas thing kind of fizzled out. This was less of an issue for me than others, but it still bothered me. Heleran. I was really anticipating Kaladin and Shallan talking about this, but nope. And lastly, the Ghostbloods: where were they most of the book? Overall, however, I really enjoyed this book. I’d give it a 8.5/10 and that’s high praise coming from me. While not as good as WoR, it is a worthy third instalment to the Stormlight Archive.
  13. Which moment in Stormlight is the most cinematic? Which would look best as a picture? I’m planning on doing some Stormlight based art, and I wondered if you had any recommendations that I should draw. Nothing that involves facial features or people in general beyond silhouettes. (This is for two reasons: I’m bad at drawing people and faces, plus I can never do characters justice and it frustrates me.) So what part of Stormlight is most cinematic? (The ones I’ve already thought about have already been drawn such as Dalinar appraoching Nergaoul and honour’s perpendiculary on the Battle of Thaylen Fields.)
  14. So I was recently perusing the Stormlight Archive books (as you do) and I realised something: the map of Thaylen City given In Way of Kings is slightly different to the one shown in Oathbringer. It’s minor, but it’s bothering me. If you cannot recall, the map of Thaylen City given in Way of Kings is given through Kabsal and his sand plate vibration thing. What is listed as Thaylen City is actually the ancient ward of Thaylen City, but that’s not what I am talking about. What I am talking about is the fact that there are some differences between both maps, though both are small details. The actual one in Oathbringer is less symmetrical. Did you notice this too? Probably not, but tell me what you think
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