Kobold King

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Kobold King last won the day on November 13 2016

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About Kobold King

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  • Gender
    Male
  • Location
    [DATA EXPUNGED]
  • Interests
    Sciences, especially zoology. At times he has kept a birding journal of the avian species he has encountered.

    Books; fiction-wise, he prefers speculative fiction from great authors such as Brandon Sanderson, Robert Heinlein, James White, and H. G. Wells.

    Marvelous movies and television programs such as "Guardians of the Galaxy" and "Doctor Who."

    Space. Spaaaaaace.

    Delusionally referring to himself in the third person.

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  1. "Yeah, I'm totally sought after. Really. Like... everybody's after me. Every... body..." * starts crying * "I just want someone to care enough to chase me..."
  2. YouTube thumbnail proclaims "ALIEN INTERVIEWED! MEANING OF LIFE REVEALED!"

    I'm feeling like if you came all this way to Earth just to make circles in our fields and poke at our cows, you're probably as clueless about that as we are.

    1. Cognizantastic

      Cognizantastic

      Look at what they are focusing on. They're telling us that farm life is the best life. They had to invent space travel before deciding anarcho-primitivism is the way to go.

      "Don't make our mistakes, human!"

  3. If A Series of Unfortunate Events and Fullmetal Alchemist were combined into a freakish chimera of a show.
  4. It's really tempting, but considering how my posts dwindled last time, and the various things I'm trying to keep up with right now, I just don't think I could make it work out. I'm very sorry, but I'll have to sit this one out. I wish all of you the best of luck getting this started, though!
  5. The Very Organized Thief is a free game available on Game Jolt in which the player takes the role of a thief with a meticulous list of items they must steal from a house. The owner of the house will arrive at a certain point and will personally catch and subdue the thief if they are not fast enough to get out. It is a simple game with nothing in the way of a story, but that doesn't stop me from overthinking it a bit. Theory: the titular Very Organized Thief knows the Owner and has been to the house before in a non-criminal context. Here's my reasoning. The Thief enters the home with a randomized list of items to steal, and will not take any item (aside from stacks of money) that is not on the list. This is slightly peculiar behavior for a thief, but it gets weirder. Some items on the list are fairly generic; the list might include a television, or a computer, or other items that one could wager almost certainly exist in an average house. But some items are oddly specific. The list might include such items as "a stamp album," "expensive wine," or the especially specific "portrait of a lady." To me this suggests that the Thief has been to the house before, and knows exactly what items are good enough to steal. Most of the items can be debated, but the "portrait of a lady" almost certainly indicates an amount of specific foreknowledge on the part of the Thief. It's simply too specific of an item to randomly guess exists in a house. The game rewards the player with a high score for acquiring all required items in a short amount of time, which is virtually impossible on a first playthrough. Subsequent playthroughs however will give the player a very good idea of the layout of the house and the placement of items, allowing the Thief to steal everything on their list in as little as forty seconds in some playthroughs. From a meta perspective, this is because of the ability to start the game over fresh and learn the layout of the house through trial and error. From an in-universe perspective, the fact that the title "Very Organized Thief" is only given for such a run suggests to me that if a story exists, it is that the 'protagonist' of a Thief is capable of this feat without the Undertale-like ability to reset time. This ought only to be possible if they have been in this house before. (Admittedly, this is my weakest point. It relies on the meta detail of the game's scoring system. However in a game titled "The Very Organized Thief," I feel it's fair to assume that the ending which bestows this title upon the player is the most likely to be 'canon,' such as that word is.) From these two lines of reasoning we can believe that the Thief has been to the Owner's house before, and knows its items and layout well enough to conduct a very organized targeted robbery in the dead of the night. The question becomes this: who is the Thief, and when did they first come into this house? Here are a couple of hypotheses. 1: The Thief stakes out their targets ahead of time. It is possible the Thief set their sights on this house beforehand, potentially even making entry in the past to scout out its loot and layout. It would be a scheme befitting of a "Very Organized Thief," and seeing as the Owner possesses a personal safe with goldbars and thousands of dollars worth of cash in their bedroom, it's probable that they are a known wealthy individual and thus a likely target for an aspiring plunderer. 2: The Thief has visited the house in a non-criminal context. Perhaps they were invited to a house party, or visited as a plumber or a electrician to work on the house. If this is the case I would suspect the Thief to be an electrician, as the player has the ability to selectively cut wires and disable functions of the house alarm system should they so choose. 3: The Thief and the Owner are estranged family or estranged lovers. This is my personal favorite theory. If the Thief and the Owner were former romantic partners sharing a home it would explain how the Thief knows the layout of the house and has the means of creating a list of items to steal. Perhaps after a bitter dispute the Thief breaks in to steal all of the items that they feel entitled to. Perhaps they were not romantic partners but were instead siblings, and what we are witnessing is an inheritance dispute. Perhaps the Thief is a deadbeat sibling or spouse, and although ostensibly kicked out of the Owner's life, they feel entitled to break in and "borrow" any item they feel like. Perhaps the Very Organized Thief lives a Very Lonely Life, shunned by the one person they had some semblance of family with. Perhaps I'm really REALLY over analyzing this free Game Jolt game.
  6. Ash is in the sky.

    It's like a cross between dreary rain clouds and lines of smoke. There's a hazy mist on the horizon. If I go a few miles down the road closer to the volcano, I smell something like rotten eggs.

    I think I finally know what it feels like on Scadrial.

  7. There's also the possibility that Thanos is actually just certifiably insane, in keeping with his comics title of "The Mad Titan."
  8. I went to Volcanoes National Park today! Figured with everything happening it was a now-or-never sort of deal.

  9. Did I ever mention on here that I moved to Hawaii? Because I did! I moved to the big island of Hawai'i at the beginning of the year!

    Also, there's a volcano erupting twelve miles away and I experienced two mild earthquakes today.

    1. Seonid

      Seonid

      Cool! How do you like it compared to Texas?

      Also - I might have started listening to the Letters Page podcast at work as a result of our last conversation with the end result that I'm all caught up and waiting anxiously for the next episode...

    2. Kobold King

      Kobold King

      I like it a lot! I love the culture out here more than my teensy rural Texas town, and the climate is nice. It's hot, but not too hot. And it rains, but it doesn't rain too much.

      I love love love the Sentinels lore. Though to be honest I mostly use the Letters to give me fanfic points of interest.

    3. Slowswift

      Slowswift

      waaaaaat

      That's awesome! (I mean, not the earthquake part. The rest of it's pretty cool.)

  10. As I said, there are valid reasons to make the argument. I just think the argument is often unevenly applied.
  11. Sadly no, she doesn't. Not until I give her an accessory upgrade, that is.
  12. I've seen some fan-made decks and cards, so maybe... My fic, predictably, mostly centers around a character who can resurrect after death.
  13. Nice to know things never change around these parts. Sentinels of the Multiverse, a superhero card game with some lore I got really invested in. I went too long without writing superhumans and started going stir crazy.
  14. Good to see you! How have you been? Sorry I haven't been around too often. I've been writing fanfic. I have almost twenty thousand words written! ...in an obscure fandom with maybe four or five potential readers. Whatever though, I make myself happy with it.
  15. Little bit of a ramble today because this is in my head. The random stuff threads are still for anything that pops into your head, right? Often times in a fandom shipping is conducted. Two characters wind up paired together by segments of the fandom, and various pieces of art and fanfiction arise depicting them in a romantic relationship. Anyone who's been in a fandom understands that this happens. But increasingly I've seen an anti-shipping attitude on the Internet, or at least, a very particular argument against it. The argument goes that shipping is a bad pursuit because it turns a wholesome platonic friendship and "forces it" to become romantic. The argument goes that it is part of a general devaluation of platonic relationships in our society; an idea that romantic relationships are the most valuable and that platonic relationships are not appreciated. I see where this argument is coming from, and I agree with it. A platonic relationship is an extremely valuable thing, and often times our society and our media don't fully accentuate that like it should be. When shippers conclude that two characters should be together solely because they act in a way that platonic friends should, it can show an inherent lack of understanding of what value a platonic relationship can hold without ever becoming romantic. But here's the uncomfortable trend I've seen that makes me uncomfortable with this argument: the fact that I almost exclusively see it applied to homosexual pairings. In almost any Hollywood movie, if there is a male character and there is a female character, the movie will pair them together at the end. This is especially true of a television series with these characters as part of a main cast. At this point there's almost an expectation that this will happen. The man and the woman belong together. Eventually, romance will come up. If we are going to open a conversation on the devaluation of platonic relationships in our society, I believe it should start here. Why can't the male and female characters be strong friends but not lovers? It's starting to happen more and more in movies, but often as a way of establishing that the woman is "strong and independent" and don't need no man. It's more of a feminist ideology than one that wants to explore the value of platonic love. Hollywood is a major trailblazer for popular culture. Hollywood should be a major focus on any discussion of tropes, harmful or otherwise. And yet so many of these people who are oh so devoted to platonic love don't seem to mind when Hollywood does it. They make these arguments of theirs solely when a fanfiction decides to pair a man and a man or a woman and a woman. They may even deny it being a problem in movies with male and female protagonists, or turn a blind eye when a fanfiction explores a heterosexual pairing that isn't featured in canon. Now, that is not to say that everyone who has ever made this argument is doing so out of homophobia. Far from it. I've made this argument before; I've seen a number of very rational people on this very forum say this very thing. But I believe that the rationality of this argument has attracted people to it who harbor some inherent discomfort with the idea of homosexuality, and rather than being honest with themselves about the reasons seeing these things make them uncomfortable, they latch onto a rational-sounding argument for why it's a bad thing and why their distaste for it is entirely justified. I think at the end of the day, it bears merit for all of us to take a look at the opinions we hold, no matter how trivial, and think long and hard about why we feel this way. Are we in pursuit of rationality, or are we seeking to justify our prejudice? Do we want to see a better and brighter world or just one that suits us personally a little better? Is it shipping we dislike, or the fact that other people might interpret a character that we relate to as a gay man or a lesbian? And really, at the end of the day, don't tell other fans what's right or wrong for them to do. If they're not actively hurting anyone, leave them be to play with their ships. This message was sponsored by the Anonymous Twilight Sparkle / Starlight Glimmer Shippers of America.